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AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

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    AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

    WAKEY WAKEY ABBERS!!

    T-Storm brewing but it almost looks like it's sliding by just to the north. We're getting the wind (and cooler temps) but no rain or show. Yet. Unfortunately it's not supposed to do anything for the heat and we will be close to 100 again to today. Yesterday in boston it hit 103 which tied a record from 85 years ago!! I have a doggie playdate to go to and I'm not really looking forward to it if it's really going to be that hot.

    No call from job #2a. Very disappointing. A position finally opened at my present place. The woman is retiring in Sept. They are keeping the title and salary the same ($$$) but have totally changed the job description. I'm not sure I agee with what they are doing but I applied anyway. I can do anything for $70K a year! I'm well qualified for this so I at least should get serious consideration. The one person who I thought would be my biggest competitor is on the Search Committee for some reason. Very odd. They were grooming her for this or so I thought. So, I've got 2 irons in the fire if #2a doesn't work out. Timing is starting to suck however as we get closer and closer to Orientation and the beginning of school.

    Tomorrow I head down to the Cape for my friend's engagement party. This will be my first really tough social even since i went AF. I dont' know anyone but my friend and her fince and they will be mingling. I'm also riding with them to the dinner party so I can't leave when I want. The other part is I'm very self conscious about how I look. I'm sure I've added 20 lbs since my skinny very fit friend last saw me in 2009. I have nothing to wear to this thing-all nice clothes don't fit anymore so my self confidence about meeting these new people is at an all time low. I'm also still very nervous about leaving all my guys with my hoarding friend. She has promised to clean up the living area and kitchen so there won't be hazards on the floors for LM to get into. Fingers crossed. So, this trip is going to be very stressful on all fronts. My one goal is to make it through AF. I don't really have any plan in place except to have an AF drink in my hands at all times and to dig deep into my memory and my committment to this lifestyle. I'm not worried about what people will think if I'm not drinking-could care less. I'm worried that I will feel so uncomfortable I will turn to AL for relief.
    But, need to get through today's scorcher first. It's finally raining and there is a great breeze coming throught the windows. So nice to have the AC turned off!!
    Will check in again tonite.
    :l
    New Birthday: May 8, 2010

    "Because dwelling from, not upon, the space you want to inherit is the fastest way to change absolutely everything."[/i]-The Universe

    KO the Beast!!

    #2
    AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

    X-Post P3! Good morning! Let's use yours!

    I am in for an AF Saturday. I woke up very early but fell asleep early, so life is good. Catching up on some reading. Then will be off to rentodump oops I mean investment property to do MY job for the day, which is measuring windows for some shades / curtains / whatever. I better google up on that.

    There is an AA picnic this afternoon - bunches of friends will be there so might swing by that depending on activities at the new place.

    My copy of my transcript from College #1 arrived yesterday, so the Junior College should have gotten theirs too. I double checked and I do believe the pre-requisites are all met on this transcript for the exemptions I want. So I will be calling the Junior College on Monday to confirm their receipt, and hopefully go register earlier rather than later next week!

    That is what's up in the dog house today. One thing is for sure...

    DG
    Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
    Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


    One day at a time.

    Comment


      #3
      AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

      P3, so sorry to hear that you are feeling so much stress about this event! Is it really worth it to go if it's so stressful? Is life to short for this?

      Of course we all react differently to stuff. In reading your description of concerns you have, the thing that would bother me the very most if it were my trip is the part about being trapped with someone else driving and not able to leave. If it were my trip, I would need to find a way to resolve that part, or I don't think I could go. Not sure if that is your biggest issue though! I hope you are able to get more comfortable with everything. :l

      I just know your job thing is going to work out in a way that is positive for you! I Believe!

      DG
      Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
      Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


      One day at a time.

      Comment


        #4
        AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

        thanks DG!! I appreciate the empathy and understanding. I guess I feel that although I'm not the social butterfly I once was, I can't keep ducking these events just because I don't drink anymore. It's important to my childhood friend that I be there, just as it's important I be at her wedding in Oct. To not go because I'm scared of being bored or being left out because I'm the stranger in the group would be very selfish of me. this event won't kill me. It may be uncomfortable but it won't kill me. In fact, if I keep my mind and heart open I may just meet some facinating people! I am fully committed to an AF life and I'm pretty sure if I cave it won't be at a party-it will be self sabatage when I'm feeling very low but that's what I have you guys here for!! Now my biggest concern is my babies and that they will be safe for 24 hours. Worst comes to worst, I take them with me, take my car to the party, turn on the super duper fan I have and put the sun shade over the car. it's supposed to be very nice on the Cape tomorrow and Monday-80's and very dry. Then I find a motel for the night or drive back home. Great thing about being AF is I can drive at any hour I want!!
        What a dif a few hours in perspective makes huh?
        New Birthday: May 8, 2010

        "Because dwelling from, not upon, the space you want to inherit is the fastest way to change absolutely everything."[/i]-The Universe

        KO the Beast!!

        Comment


          #5
          AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

          What a dif a few hours in perspective makes huh?
          Indeed! And yours is wonderful as always. :l

          DG
          Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
          Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


          One day at a time.

          Comment


            #6
            AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

            Good Morning All,

            We stopped for the night and we are about 3 hrs away from camp. It is remarkably cooler here and feels so refreshing.

            P3. I know you will do well at this party today. My hope for you is that you go in a way that makes you and your dogs the most comfortable. You are a beautiful, strong person so hold your head high and be open to possibility and FUN!!!. Say Hello to the Cape for me. I grew up in RI and MA and I miss my visits to the Cape.

            LVT. It sounds like your husbands symptoms could be a result of his progression with drinking. Chronic long-term drinkers exhibit all of those symptoms. Have you ever thought of making the decisions for awhile? I don't want to get into your family business and what you believe is most important but this might take your sons out of the line of fire. It could cause some other tension between you and your husband but that might not be all so bad. I always go back to the something that really struck me about addiction (and dealing with the drug addiction of my brother) and that is that those with alcohol and drug addiction are not going to stop unless they are experiencing a considrable amount of pain and our job is to NOT take the pain away.

            DG and Det--I do think that fats help. I love advocado and I also cook with coconut oil. I do really like the Paleo diet.

            Hello to everyone else.

            Big congrats to Dglv on making it AF. Big deposit in the self-confidence bank for ou!!!

            Where's Bear been these days?

            M3
            AF Since April 20, 2008
            4 Years!!!
            :lilheart:

            Comment


              #7
              AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

              Good Mornin All!

              Jeez Pap, Doggie and M3 ? you Dudes are up early!

              Made it another night! I might start getting the hang of this. So here is how I dealt with last night. I called both our boys and told them they were on their own for dinner ? I was gonna? take their Mom out to dinner! Then as soon as I got home I didn?t stop to think about AL. Got Mrs. IJM and away we went for a nice dinner. After which I dropped the top on the car and we went for a nice nighttime ride for a while.

              I need to come up with some plans for tonight. I?m smoking a roast all day today. Problem is that I have to be home to tend to it all day. Think I will keep myself busy with some yard work.

              Pap ? hope you see a big ?ol job offer real soon ? one so big you will worry about what tax bracket it will push you into. Quick question? Are you planning on running for public office and need your friend?s vote? If not then why worry about your appearance. Just be yourself and I will bet you will have a blast.

              Doggie ? You are doing all the things that would make me want to grab an air sick bag ? closing on a house, going back to school. The only thing I haven?t seen you sign up for yet is a prostate exam! That would sort of round out the list of things I avoid at all costs!

              M3 ? have fun camping!

              The IJM thought of the day?. ?If ghosts can walk through walls and glide down stairs, why don't they fall through the floor??

              Have a great weekend all!
              IJM

              Comment


                #8
                AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

                Hey IJM,

                Forgot to give a shout out to you. How about going for a short run or run/walk. No time like the present and you'll be back in no time at all to tend that roast. Any alcohol in the house my friend? If there is, tell your wife to dispose of it or hide it. Happy to hear you're doing well.

                M3
                AF Since April 20, 2008
                4 Years!!!
                :lilheart:

                Comment


                  #9
                  AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

                  Love ya IJM!! You always make me laugh!

                  Thanks all for the boost of confidence. I am now looking forward to the party tomorrow and seeing my dear friend so happy in her relationship and retirement.

                  Gotta get ready for the doggie party now!
                  New Birthday: May 8, 2010

                  "Because dwelling from, not upon, the space you want to inherit is the fastest way to change absolutely everything."[/i]-The Universe

                  KO the Beast!!

                  Comment


                    #10
                    AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

                    Hi all,

                    Fingers crossed for everyone for all their projects and hopes.

                    Am still around and AF but fall asleep almost as soon as I sit down at the moment. Have got to get my act together as am going to the theatre tonight. Absolutely do not want to doze off during the second act. No pressure to drink at this one although I am very good at resisting pressure. I find the cravings worse when I am alone always one of my old triggers.

                    The famous sleeping through mealtimes diet has stopped working. I put on 1.5lbs this week.

                    Sending lucky vibes to all.

                    Take care
                    Learn from yesterday, live for today and hope for tomorrow - Einstein
                    AF 8 June 2012

                    Comment


                      #11
                      AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

                      Good morning Abbers!

                      Well the heat has taken out one of my chickens.......crap!
                      Poor things, I'd croak too if I had to live out in that record-breaking heat

                      papmom, I'm jumping on your shoulder & will be with you all weekend whispering Lavan-ittudes in your ear :H
                      Just go to your friend's party & don't worry about the rest....it's BS

                      Greetings DG, M3 & IJM!
                      There will be minimal outside work for this girl until this heatwave breaks. It's just nasty out there & I have more poison ivy breaking out......

                      Wishing everyone a fantastic AF Saturday!

                      Lav
                      AF since 03/26/09
                      NF since 05/19/09
                      Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                      Comment


                        #12
                        AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

                        G'Day all,
                        Just saying hello. Not much to report. On Thursday night (Day 10) I had some wobbles. Latest bewitching thought that assailed me 'Being without alcohol is just not relaxing. I'll never be able to relax again properly.' Anyway-because I'm really trying to train my awareness I caught that thought and laughted it to scorn just before it began to depress me and before the cravings set in.
                        A few deep breaths later it began to subside. Had a few opportunities to drink this weekend already and managed an assertive 'no thanks.' Wish me luck!
                        Sending positive feelings of power to all,
                        x Treya
                        AF since 11 July 2011
                        You can never get enough of what you don't really want

                        Comment


                          #13
                          AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

                          Morning abberoos!

                          Day 50 for me here. Treya, have you tried deep breathing or meditation? It really helps me to relax.

                          It is hot - again! I slept in and am still feeling tired but I will head to the pool in about a half an hour to cool down. My sister and my neice should be here later tonight so I am looking forward to that. I am also looking forward to having this entire day to myself to relax and chill out. I read my morning meditation and did my prayer and am feeling good. I am so glad I went to that treatment centre. What a difference it made in my daily outlook.

                          I hope everyone has a great AF day today.
                          Every day is a day to start over and remember that I am powerless over my addiction. I will no longer give the BEAST any power over me - he can go straight to hell.
                          :h

                          Comment


                            #14
                            AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

                            Greetings everyone, well done universal on 50 days great job.


                            :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

                            Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
                            I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

                            This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

                            Comment


                              #15
                              AF Daily-Sat July 23, 2011

                              Good Morning!

                              Had a beautiful sober Friday night and I'm up an kickin ass and taking names this morning! My lord I feel great! This is the way to be! Why do I question that? Anyway! Working this morning, had a run and breakfast already.
                              DG-good luck in school-its hard!
                              P3- you will do great at the party! Your strength will carry you through. Well be in the back eating
                              popcorn (and maybe a little ice cream!)
                              M3- good to see you! Glad your back seems better!
                              IMJ- so good to meet you! You are so funny! I can see why these guys missed you!
                              Lav- poor chicky! That sucks! How hot is it getting there? Here in Texas were are in the 100's everyday
                              Mario-good to see you
                              Uni-glad your back and doing well!
                              You always succeed if you never stop trying.
                              Everyday we choose the direction of change.

                              Comment

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