AF Daily - Thurs 9/15

[greeneyes]

Here ya go! Run with it!

[Lavande]

AF Daily - Thurs 9/15

Good morning queenie greenie

Good morning to one & all!
Having a hard time getting my big blue butt in gear......allergy season is rough on me
Really looking forward to the cooler air promised this weekend. Want to get outside with the electric hedge trimmers & do some serious cutting :H

Grandsons will be here at 1 pm so I need to do a few things before they arrrive for an afternoon/evening full of fun.

Wishing everyone a terrific AF Thursday!

Lav

[lucky 2.0]

AF Daily - Thurs 9/15

I will not drink today.

[LVT25]

AF Daily - Thurs 9/15

Hello friends,

It is a cool, rainy blustery 38 degrees here this morning. I am seriously thinking about crawling under the covers again after the kids get off to school. I used to do that a lot back in my drinking days. I also spent a lot more time on the couch. Yuck!

Lav and Det--I feel the same way about Dr Oz. I like his book and I even record his show every day, but could care less if I see it anymore really. And I haven't seen Dr. Phil in years. The hormone diet he was talking about was apparently something you buy over the counter. Some supplements that help you burn fat. Anyway, I gave up fad diets years ago--Burn more calories than you take in and you will lose weight. I hope I find the time and motivation to start working out soon. I am super soft, and I know at my tender age of 29, I am going to have to change my eating habits and exercise more!

Marshy, the friend that signed me up as a volunteer passed away a few years ago---he still had the paperwork in his home, his mom gave it back to me. At that time you had to be on the fire department and the rescue squad. I am going to do some checking, I think they have changed that--as I really have no desire to fight fires. I have also hesitated because living in such a small community the odds are if you go to the scene of an accident it is going to be someone you know.

I had a pretty productive day yesterday. Did some canning and laundry. Now my goal is to actually cook with this stuff otherwise it is a huge waste of time. I've got a friend that I think will be happy to take some of the older salsa and spicy juice off my hands.
After I go to work for a bit, I might can the rest of the tomatoes sitting here.

Pap--congrats on the part time job! I've wondered about the site keeping the AL on the mind more than not. But I also think it keeps me from deciding I can drink again. I'm afraid of what would happen if I didn't check in here, and I have become so attached to all my monthly abs friends!

One of the assistant football coaches just called. This is one of the volunteer coaches. He just found out last night my son turned in his gear. We had a good talk. Unfortunately, it isn't the head coach that needs to change his ways.

Guess I won't be going back to bed today.

Have a good sober one!:h

[LVT25]

AF Daily - Thurs 9/15

Hi Lav-cross post. Hope your allergies calm down.

:welcome:Lucky2.0 Good for you! Stay with us, we're committed to AF DAILY!

[Kaslo]

AF Daily - Thurs 9/15

Good morning Fabinkies....!

I want to thank all of you for your kind words on my 8 month best before date. In this case its a best after date.

Greenie, have a great day ruling over the Green Realm.

Lav I wish I had as much contact with my gks as you have and I hear you re Arthur. What a mean old man he is. I have stopped taking Arthrotec, tired of the intestinal discomfort. I am going to see if I can just do Advil now that I have been AF since last February.

Lucky, me neither. Not a sausage.

LV enjoy the jems on the shelf...I used to love canning. Except I know what you mean. Id can my arse off and then the jars would sit on the shelf. My own fault of course. Not the tomatoes though. They got used. Hmm.

I have searched to corners of my brain for something awesome to relate to yez all. Unfortunately nothing emerged but dust motes and a solitary fly.

Kaslo

[Treya]

AF Daily - Thurs 9/15

Hi all,

On the run here but just want to say have a great AF day.

Kaslo it only seems like yesterday I was congratulating you for 6 months. 8 months is super -awesome. Maybe one day I'll get there myself. meanwhile...you are like one of those annoying kids at school who's older than you and will always be older than you!! :goodjob: Only kiddin. No competition involved in being AF -right??

Lucky 2 Don't drink today. We'll join you. :H

LVT25 I take it that's 38 farenheit? It must be near 34 centigrade here today in Italia. A little hot for this fresh air junkie-but there's always a siesta You and me wishing for some cooler air Lavande.

And now to the sunbed for some vitamin A (in shade)

XTreya

[universal]

AF Daily - Thurs 9/15

Hi guys,

Went to see my friend yesterday. She looked good considering. She is having surgery this morning for them to try to stop the bleeding and put a stent in to drain her lungs. Not sure what is going to happen here.

I'm okay, tired and kind of irrritable today. Going to head to the farmers market and get a coffee with a GF who is also in recovery. I just need to get out of this house. I feel like all I have done lately is cook and clean and I'm about to lose my mind! Some well needed GF time will be healthy and healing for me.

Hope everyone else has a good day!

Bean, to answer your question from yesterday - I don't tell everyone I meet that I'm an alcoholic but if they are offering me al and won't stop or if they have it around me all the time I a) don't go there (people, places and things are huge in early recovery) or b) tell them I am in recovery and to please stop offering me al. My house is AL free and my trailer is AL free and those who are important to me know. They are supportive and loving. That's my .02 cents on that topic!

Love and hugs,
Uni

[Bean]

AF Daily - Thurs 9/15

I am struggling BIG TIME. Just don't know how I'm going to beat this right now. Feeling really really hopeless.

[Kaslo]

AF Daily - Thurs 9/15

Hi Bean. Read the Tool Box thread. I still read that thread quite often. Its incredibly helpful. ALso maybe seek some med help at the Hosp in N. Just go to emerg and tell the emerg physician whats going on. You CAN do it, you ARE worth it, it WILL get better.

kas

[greeneyes]

AF Daily - Thurs 9/15

Bean, it'll pass!! Get out of the house away from AL. Go for a long walk, go visit someone, go a movie, but go occupy your brain and body somewhere else. You don't want to keep doing day one over and over. You need some AF time under your belt before you go home. You can get through this!!

[Bean]

AF Daily - Thurs 9/15

I am going to clean for a friend any minute now. They know about my problem so I can be open with them which will probably help. I drank last night and had a fight with my BF...now he is saying that he keeps emotional distance from me because he never knows if he will turn up to find me drinking. Probably fair comment but it hurt.

Got to go.
Bean

[Doggygirl]

AF Daily - Thurs 9/15

Bean, I love Greenie's suggestion to get out of your house and do something. Go for a walk or whatever relaxes you and helps you change the channel in your head.

Those truths are very difficult. I think we have all been through that process on some level or other, with various types of people in our lives (spouses or SO's or kids or bosses or friends, etc.) For me those truths hurt because that stuff had been true for a long time, but I didn't want to accept it. Once the people closest to me started saying something, it hurt but also made it impossible for me to live in complete denial anymore. ((((Bean))))) One day at a time. Or one minute at a time. Just get through today AF. I know you can do it. And Bean, Kas is right about the hospital. If you have any concerns about detoxing on your own, please ASK FOR HELP. I know how much our pride gets in our way of doing that. But this is life and death my friend.

I'm joining you Lucky in no drinks for today.

LVT - I envy your canning. I just didn't get any done this year. I will regret that when I have no home canned tomatoes this winter! :upset:

Uni, enjoy your GF time today!!! Too much time with myself doing household stuff isn't good for me either.

Lav, I had to stop and think for a moment when I read "big blue butt!" :H Enjoy the g-sons!

Greenie, thanks for getting us started. What man-projects are you working on today?

School was good today. The subject of denial came up and our teacher reviewed something I had never heard of - the Jahari Window. Google turns up lots of info - it's a tool used much more broadly than just recovery circles.

Basically there are 4 panes to the window:

1. OPEN (side of me) - Info I know about myself that others also know about me.
2. BLIND (side of me) - Info that others know about me that I do not know about myself. (i.e. people farther along in recovery than me can see things in my thinking or behavior that I absolutely do not see)
3. HIDDEN (side of me) - Things I know about myself that I keep hidden from others. (there is a saying that we are as sick as our secrets - those things we keep hidden to protect our egos / images, etc. - lot's of this in early recovery)
4. UKNOWN - things I don't know about myself and nobody else knows either. (an example would be future events - I dont' know when I am going to die and nobody else knows either)

Typically in early recovery, our "open" pane is very small, and our blind and hidden panes are much larger. The goal is to get this stuff in better balance.

Anyway...I wish I had a video of the teacher presentation. It was really good - much better than I can posibly describe in a post!

One thing is for sure, AL takes me to a very dark place very quickly - and I don't want to go there today.

DG

[greeneyes]

AF Daily - Thurs 9/15

Doggygirl;1177905 wrote: Greenie, thanks for getting us started. What man-projects are you working on today?

I fixed the toilet this morning! $5 flapper thing. Yay!
Work work
other kind of work
errands
swimming
yoga in a bit

I'm enjoying all your school info! Blind side... never thought about that!

[Kaslo]

AF Daily - Thurs 9/15

DG, loved your discussion here about open, blind, hiddden and unknown. (who knew?)

I also think that the type of abuser we were has differing degrees of these conditions. I think the closet drinker has a HUGE blind side. I am embarrassed to think that I thought nobody knew but I suspect that several of the friends and relations I had actually knew a lot more than I gave them credit for. I also think I THOUGHT I was very open, and told myself I was, but was infact I was totally blind, and or hidden and or unknown.

And one more thing I think. I think that younger drinkers who enhabit the bar scene, big social drinkers have a much harder time with NOT drinking, because they have been very open. They must no longer drink, they have such a huge obstacle dealing with the explanation they feel they owe to the world that they can NOT drink anymore...cause its killing them. When a blind or hidden drinker quits, its business as usual. No one even notices. Its kind of a lunch bag let down, actually.

Kaslo.