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I have been so used

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    #1

    I have been so used

    After reading Mario's thread yesterday regarding all the crap that AL does to you (can't find the thread now), it got me thinking more about my past relationship with alcohol.

    When I think back to old relationships (way back when I was in university) and the guy you really liked only wanted you for one thing and could care less about you as a person. I remember feeling so used and that I would never let that person have the privledge of my company or otherwise because they cheated me and made me feel used, hurt etc....

    Well that's exactly what AL has done to all of us. I never really viewed it in that way. But boy am I ever pissed off that I let AL abuse me, hurt me, embarass me, humiliate me, physically emotionally and spiritually. And I kept coming back to it - Ughhhh :yuk:

    Well just like old bad relationships - Alcohol will NEVER have the privilege of taking advantage of me ever again. I am so OVER you. :bat

    I'm at the point where I don't even miss it as I hate what it did to me, how it controlled me. I don't view that first buzz you get after a couple of drinks as good, I view it as disgusting because it was the AL Beast slowly sliping it's greasy slimely self around you controlling you.

    When I decided to be an Abstiener for life I was nervous and fearful that I may fail yet again. However now that I look at AL in this horrible yet honest way I will not let it abuse me again.

    Thanks Mario for the thread you posted yesterday, it was a gift to me as I now fully and completely have a clear view of Alcohol. I am so excited for my life. :thumbs:
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    #2
    I have been so used

    Thanks....

    For posting this. I "think" I miss that "buzz"....where you almost feel so warm and fuzzy that all is right with the world. Its only AL giving you a hug that you have let him back in. And yet that warm and fuzzy feeling will be ripped from you by morning. Never really looked at it that way before. I do not miss his hugs But, I would be lying if I said I did not miss that feeling.

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      #3
      I have been so used

      Awesome post, Meech. What a great way to look at it. I'll use this the next time the cravings hit.
      ~ The chief cause of failure is trading what you want most for what you want now ~
      -----------------------------------
      Goal #1 - 7 days AF -

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        #4
        I have been so used

        Right there with you Meech
        AF since 03/26/09
        NF since 05/19/09
        Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

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          #5
          I have been so used

          I have replaced the warm and fuzzy feeling of the first 2 drinks with falling asleep naturally every nite. I wake up most mornings now amazed that I actually feel asleep and didn't wake up at 3am with heartburn and a headache. That AL induced warm and fuzzy feeling isn't all it's cracked up to be is it?
          Great post Meech! Keep up the good work!!
          :l
          New Birthday: May 8, 2010

          "Because dwelling from, not upon, the space you want to inherit is the fastest way to change absolutely everything."[/i]-The Universe

          KO the Beast!!

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            #6
            I have been so used

            Great post!!! What an interesting perspective on the AL beast.
            I am the master of my fate . I am the captain of my soul.

            Had 10 weeks AF from 9-11-11 to 11-24-11


            AF since 2/20/12

            Goal no.1 - 1 week DONE !

            Goal no.2 - 2 weeks.

            Goal no.3 - 30 days.

            Gaol no.4 - 10 weeks .

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              #7
              I have been so used

              Meech, I just have to let you know that I read your post last night and knew as I read it that it would profoundly and forever change the way I think about alcohol. So much so that I was still thinking about it as I fell asleep, and when I woke up throughout the night for a few minutes my mind would drift back to it.

              The sentence you have about the first buzz being disgusting because it's the beast slipping its greasy, slimy self around you to control you. Priceless!

              Thank you so much for your post. I can't imagine not being able to fight off the craving for that first glass of wine if I use this imagery.
              ~ The chief cause of failure is trading what you want most for what you want now ~
              -----------------------------------
              Goal #1 - 7 days AF -

              Comment

                #8
                I have been so used

                Irie,

                I am SOOOO glad I could help. I feel the same way. Now that I view the AL Beast in this light it is so much easier to rid it of my life.

                I do not want to wake up 20 years from now still struggling with Alcohol. What a waste. Too much living to do.

                Have a sober productive day everyone! :l

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                  #9
                  I have been so used

                  Well said Meech! Thanks for posting this. You are right...too much living to do. We are lucky to find this out before it gets too late!
                  Whatever you invest in the circle of LIFE is what comes back to you. Multiplied. What you give to people is what they eventually give back to you. Don't do the math. Just increase your LOVE.

                  BE HAPPY...BE CONNECTED...BE HEALTHY!                   :h

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                    #10
                    I have been so used

                    i really needed to read this today - as i am seeing old friend this weekend who i used to regularly get wasted with - not what i want anymore. i feel blue and no enthuusiasm to do anything/bit ill/ worried if i don't go to work/will i feel worse staying at home mooching about stuff.
                    meh - sorry pity party alert!
                    one day at a time

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                      #11
                      I have been so used

                      I hope the thread is helpful Bear! Don't let the Beast get his slimey hands on you this weekend. We all have those bleh days. I'm having a bit of one today too. No motivation. Tomorrow will be a new day.

                      My middle child is home sick so I just did lots of TLC with him. So I guess it's not a day gone by unwasted. Just not too productive.

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