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[beherenow]

Hi everyone!

I have again started complicating my life with my drinking. Been sober for quite some time but suddenly started drinking just for fun about six months back. Now the downward spiral has continued and I am not enjoying my drinking sessions at all. In fact, each one of those makes me feel more guilty.
So now I have decided to come over to mwo, journal my way through this whole month so that I stay sober.
I am aware that this is a great forum for people who want to quit drinking and preserves our anonymity.
Looking forward to making this a successful month of abstention.
:thanks:

[daisy45]

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beherenow Welcome! I know just how you feel. I am doing just the same. On day 4 now and feeling better already.
It doesn't take long for the fun to stop....but you have come to the right place. Check out the Newbies Nest and read as much as you can. There is a wealth of information here.
Looking forward to getting to know the new and sober you!

[caper564]

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hey BHN.. i too am starting again, not sure if i feel better already but i am trucking thorugh each day. the worst for me is the boredom at night.. what do sober people do all night ? sit around and watch TV... LOL.. keep it up we will make it.

caper

[papmom3]

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Oh my Caper no no no no!! We do NOT sit around watching TV all nite!! That's what I did when I was drinking. Now.....
Mon/Fridays-I have my own home based business and this is when I do that work
Tues-Quilting class(took this up the same time I went AF)
Wed-agility class
Thurs-part time job at nursing home
Sat-day off-time to catch up with cleaning and errands/social events-crash early at nite
Sun-all day shift at nursing home

Did I mention I also have a full time job that I do MUCH better now that I'm not hungover every day?????

Oh, and now I fit time in with my pets and actually FEED them at nite!!

So no, we do NOT sit around watching TV every nite-I rarely watch the boob tube anymore. No time, and couldn't be bothered.

The sober life is so fulfilling and now I don't have enough time to do everything I want!!

Try it -you'll like it!! :l

[retteacher]

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bhn & caper: If you're worried/guilty about your drinking, then you probably should try abstinence. Normal drinkers don't even think about drinking.

Sober people do all sorts of things at night:
-go to MWO.
-go to AA meetings.
-see friends & family.
-read.
-hobby.
-etc.

I was an alone drinker. It was intensely boring. I planned my day around drinking & hiding it. I felt guilty & ashamed every day. My energy was all tied up in the obsession w/drinking.

It's so freeing to be away from all that. I have much more energy for positive things.

Good luck to you both.

Mary

[beherenow]

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Its been a few hours since I put my first post and already replies are received from three people with a range of experiences - starters daisy and caper and experienced papmom & retteacher.
Daisy, yes. I shall be reading in a lot to try and soak up experiences but for me the problem really is not knowledge but my tendency to lose track and forget my lessons. Alcohol is a really sneaky addiction- just when I thought I had things under perfect control, it reminds me of my all-too-familiar fallibility.
Caper & retteacher (retired teacher?), your reply is perfect. It is about having a concrete plan for handling our tricky, testing times; the times when we are bored and get sucked into drinking.
For me, as for most, the evenings are troublesome. When I do not have a solid plan, I tend to fall away.
So just for today, I resolve to go back from work and use the evening productively - spend the time with family and working on other essentials - probably read something positive.
And yes, I shall be putting up daily posts at least for the month.
And shall practise being here and now.

[Nelz]

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You have made a very wise decision young grasshopper!! You've done it before, so you know how to do it again. This is indeed a great place, lots of good people, lots of support.

Almost a guarantee, that someone on here either has or is going through what you are at the moment, and will have some way to cope or deal with it. I wish you all the strength needed to battle this beast with us, it can be done GOOD LUCK

Havent been on much lately, so havent give this little gem out for a while,


Here's yer star!

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[Lavande]

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Just want to say hello & welcome to beherenow & caper!

Glad you joined us, MWO is a great place

I have been a busy, busy person since going AF like most here. No more excuses, no guilt, no hangovers ~ life is good!

Hey Nelz - I don't think you've ever given me a star :H

Wishing everyone the best!

Lav

[piper123]

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I am finishing up day three and I started swimming again, and going to the gym. I kind of walk around in a daze though...not sure where to start. Tonight I tried a little of a spinning class, but didn't want a sore butt so quit halfway through. My gym has a big screen movie room that is dark like a movie theater (the gym is actually a renovated movie theater) with all kinds of random equipment in it. Each day they show one movie over and over. Today was the 40 year old virgin. It was so funny doing a mile on the elliptical laughing with everyone else working on machines. Each day I have to do something physical. Even if it means walking around the block.

So that's what I do at night. It's hard because I had to put my dog down on Saturday morning so my comfort pal is gone and it's very lonely. That is why I have to go out and be around people. I keep remembering the HALT....and I'm not hungry or angry or tired (well, now I am), but I am lonely and that is my trigger. That is my mountain.

Keep posting and good night.

[papmom3]

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Oh Piper-so sorry to hear about your pooch. It's never easy no matter what the reason. At least you're taking care of yourself and not letting AL make a very sad time even worse.

Post as much as you want and keep up the good work.

:l

[beherenow]

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Day 2

Day one negotiated safely, on to day two now.
Hello piper, nelz, lavande and papmom.
Been a heavy day at my workplace but that shall not be an excuse for boozing in the evening.
Have to attend a social function but my resolve is strong - I shall not have anything to do with drinking.
Taking it one day at a time for now.

[sunshine_gg]

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Well done on day 2, BHN! And Welcome, too! :hallo:

[Nelz]

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Lavande;1218868 wrote: Just want to say hello & welcome to beherenow & caper!

Glad you joined us, MWO is a great place

I have been a busy, busy person since going AF like most here. No more excuses, no guilt, no hangovers ~ life is good!

Hey Nelz - I don't think you've ever given me a star :H

Wishing everyone the best!

Lav

Lav, you've set the bar so high, I dont think you could ever get one! Truly one of many favorites on here..........keep tryin..........LOL


Great job on day one Behere, just keep it up, and keep crossing off and counting up days

[beherenow]

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day 3

Day 3 is here and as I reflect back, my life takes a familiar pattern - the whole day spent at the workplace, too busy to think of anything other than work, so never a problem time. Evenings are a different matter. When I lower my guard and consciousness, I fall prey to the idea of having just one drink and off I go sliding down the slippery slope.
The problem is probably my binge-drinking. Once I start, having just a couple of drinks never seem to give me the buzz, so I go on and on to the stage where I start to slur and behave oddly. And my sleep is always disturbed when I drink, where I wake up in the middle of the night and then cannot go back to sleep with vague thoughts swirling around my mind.
I know that I can push myself back to sobriety and the path starts with this attempt to stay sober for 30 days.
Thanks for the welcome Sunshine and Nelz thanks to you for giving me a leg up.
I am using this thread as a journal to post on a daily basis. I find that publicly journaling my intentions tend to strengthen my resolve. And yes, experienced friends always seem to guide and motivate us along the path. I have tried such journaling earlier to give u smoking and that worked wonders.
Today being a saturday night, I need to be extra cautious.

[beherenow]

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here I am again

Back again after long. Not that I fell away in-between. Been drinking off and on without that strong commitment to completely stay away. Shall just keep journaling here to strengthen my resolve.
Hello all my wonderful friends! Have a great day.