Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

[Chillgirl]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Evening guys

Dewdrop - oh dear, you have caught a nasty one, sending you healing vibes and hope you get some sleep tonight. These things usually just have to take their course so be gentle with yourself and drink plenty fluids.

Papmom - Sorry but you do make me giggle, Medical networks, bordatella shots and VPN connections, remember I'm blonde and I really have no clue what you are on about :H

Blondie - great to see you back and thank you for your honesty. You did amazingly well stopping at two, like Papmom it's just not an option for me and never will be. Can I just ask you to please be very careful. So many people on MWO started again with just 2 or 3 and thought to themselves that they had mastered moderation. Most times it all goes horribly wrong with it building back up to previous levels and beyond. I just wonder what the point is in having 2? Isn't it harder to have to be on your guard rather than relaxing and saying "no"? I'm not trying to put a damper on your success I'm just genuinely wanting you to be careful.
The AL monster can sound very convincing, that's why I prefer to keep him buried 6 feet under, padlocked and chained with the key thrown away.

I've been on a roller coaster of emotions today, some pretty extreme feelings of hopelessness, tears and a heavy heart. Now I'm tired and calm listening to the wind howling outside and I'm heading to bed. As she said in one of my all time fav movies "tomorrow is another day".

I like January Jewell's, we are a priceless bunch of gems

[Guitarista]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Warmest greetings to each and everyone of you, and compliments of the season!

I'll have you know that I am the original loin cloth man....of the 'commando' variety. I hope no-one is reading this over breakfast!

Vale your dog Rustop. I bet he/she had a great life with you.

Now Chilli. I wonder if grey sky's are having a negative effect on you? They can on me, but i know that just above those grey sky's, are blue ones.

[Guitarista]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Warmest greetings to each and everyone of you, and compliments of the season!

I'll have you know that I am the original loin cloth man....of the 'commando' variety. I hope no-one is reading this over breakfast!

Vale your dog Rustop. I bet he/she had a great life with you.

Now Chilli. I wonder if grey sky's are having a negative effect on you? They can on me, but i know that just above those grey sky's, are blue ones.

Wishing everyone a safe, sober, happy and healthy week. :h

[cyntree]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Evening all - (darn, just missed you, G-man! (you knitting/commando tease, you))

Dew, dear me, do take care - that sounds like a horrible bug, uuuugh. Rest rest rest...

Lav, hope that your day with the fam was wonderful.

Blonde - glad that you survived your holiday, wow it sounds intense...always feel free to speak to your experience here, that's what we do! I will say that it took me several years of modding which then turned into problem drinking over and over and over again before I was so sick and tired of that cycle that I decided anything was better than that merry-go-round. Good luck with your approach; keep your eyes and heart open to notice the hills and valleys...

Chill - between the weather and your job, (which sounds pretty dreadful - inspecting rental properties!) you sound anchorless, adrift, and as if you are riding out a bad storm. In my life, that place has been much harder to face sober than it was when drinking, because it just remains there, inescapable - - - what was that great quote Lav gave us not long ago, about the sharp edge of the experience? Aaaargh - my heart goes out to you...but I truly believe the right solution is coming to you, maybe it's just time to stop wrestling with the angel and let the questions go for awhile??... So glad that a friend is coming to see you to give some on-the-spot support. Hang in there and thanks for the honesty.

wishing all an enveloping peace --

[papmom3]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Ah Chillie-you make me giggle too! You are much smarter than you give that blonde head of yours credit for!

Bortatella is a vacinne to protect against kennel cough and is required of most boarding and day care facilities. Kennel cough is like our common cold and there are thousands of varieties of the bug, bordatella is just one and so I hate giving that as there is no guarantee that it will prevent a nasty case of kennel cough. But it is fairly harmless and if it turns out I can't afford day care (and after the $240 vet visit today that is a good possibility) then I won't rebooster.

VPN-Virtual Private Networks. These allow workers to log onto a company's network from home and it's pretty much like you are right at your workstation.

Medical Network-All the services you could want are administered by one company/clinic-ortho, vision, office visits, xrays, ultrasound, mammos, lab work etc. This company/clinic takes my insurance and they provide all the specialists too. I am loving it!!


Blondie-listen to Chill-she is spot on. There are a number of relapse stories that started with "moderation". go find DG and Greenie's stories just to start and then decide if this is the route for you.

Just back from boot camp and agility. Boot camp is over for me :upset:. I can't afford to keep going and they will be meeting at a time/day I can't swing. I got a lot out of it tho so just need to find motivation to do it on my own.

time for dinner!

[papmom3]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

why do I always hit send before I'm finished???

Dew-sounds like a nasty flu bug has found you. Do take care and get lots of rest and hydration. :l :l

Chill-sounds like the emotional flu got you! I'm so sorry you were so blue but maybe the tears needed to flow to get the toxins out. Hang in there. I feel you are very close to a decision. :l :l

Cyn-Amen.

[Lavande]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Good evening all!

Had a great family day at the Brandywine River Museum. Here was the best part & EB just loved it:
The Brandywine River Museum Railroad Returns for A Brandywine Christmas

We had a great lunch at PF Changs too that someone offered to pay for (since he invited himself to go on the outing :H )
Had everyone back here for a quick dinner too!

papmom, the Bortatella vaccine is a ripoff IMHO. My dogs always came home with kennel cough when I've boarded them so I just won't board dogs anymore. Daycare probably won't be such a germ factory for your dog. I used to do some work from home for an insurance company, my VPN was great.

Dewdrop, Nurse Lav recommends lots & lots of green tea. I swear that stuff keeps me healthy. Hope you feel better very soon

Chill, we talked a while ago about investing in a light box.........why don't you look for one now? It can't hurt & just might help you thru these winter doldrums. I've seen some good bargains online. I've been taking a St John Wort supplement for the past three years & I find I am much less blue - even during these winter months.

G - I sure hope your loin cloth stay put in windy weather :H
You know we'll never be able to get that image out of our minds now!!!

Blondie, glad you checked in, we were worrying about you!

cyn, it all does get easier when we stop wrestling with everyting!
I naturally want to be in control of what happens to me but that is a leftover from my childhood experiences. I was actually taught by my mother 'control or be controlled' That was all because of my father's controlling, abusive behavior towards all of us. I have found my current circumstances easier to deal with by just letting it all go.

OK, enough from me. Wishing everyone a comfy AF night. Where is our girl Rusty??

Lav

[papmom3]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Lav I totally agree about the bordetella thing but have no choice if Mickey is to go to day care. The owners agree with me too but for liability purposes they require the vaccine.

The winds are howling here tonite-they say gusts up to 40 but I swear it's a continuous 40 with gusts much higher. If it wasn't winter I would think hurricane!!

I took 2 books out of the library today so I think I will treat myself for 30 min or when I fall asleep-whatever comes first!!

[Chillgirl]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Good morning diligent ones
This year is slipping fast through our fingers like the sand in an hour glass and I wish I could put my foot on the brake just to give me more time to prepare for the next one....

Lav - I share EB's love of train sets, I know I'm a girl but as a kid I adored them along with trucks and diggers. I won't invest in a light box as there is no way in the world I will spend another winter in Scotland! Standing in a damp rental apartment yesterday waiting for the viewer to arrive, I stared out the window at the pelting rain and swore I would escape somehow.

Papmom - thanks for the run down, yes we too have kennel cough vac, I just never heard it called bordatella. What's the story with Mickey going to day care? Isn't he usually at home with the other two?

Cyn - you are such a dear and have got it so on the mark. I really DO feel this is all so much harder to face sober. If I was drowning my sorrows and numbing out every night after work I wouldn't be able to go to the depth of despair my mind is taking me to. I intensely dislike my job and the people I work with, all I do other than work is come home alone. I have no friends here and the only ones I see are my family who I just cannot relate to. I'm screaming on the inside. I'm getting way past the stage of having to work out a plan, I just want to escape!

Mr G - I too now can't get the image out of my head of you in a loincloth :h nothing like a little eye candy to make a girl smile.......

[startingover]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Hi Dazzlers
I just wanted to say how much I enjoy this thread. Its so honest and helpful. Knowing we arent alone in our struggles and triumphs is so important.
Chill, I have shed more tears lately than I have in a lifetime I think. We will sort this. I think I can just about promise you that. In a few months we will look back at this time and wonder why we were so worried and sad.

[bear73]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

hey all - good luck blondie.
i have tried to mod many times - can start off on 2-3 but find it hard and also soon get back to old levels. hope it works out for you - be really honest with yourself.
asking myself why i wanted to quit in first place helps me.

[Guitarista]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

startingover;1234665 wrote: Hi Dazzlers
I just wanted to say how much I enjoy this thread. Its so honest and helpful. Knowing we arent alone in our struggles and triumphs is so important.
Chill, I have shed more tears lately than I have in a lifetime I think. We will sort this. I think I can just about promise you that. In a few months we will look back at this time and wonder why we were so worried and sad.

You are never alone around here Starty! :l

[startingover]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Guitarista;1234677 wrote: You are never alone around here Starty! :l

:h:h:h

[Guitarista]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Hiya Blondie,

I have been down the moderation road for the last half of this year after 2.5 yrs of sobriety. It was something i wanted to do, as i thought i could control it. Well, slowly but surely, my drinking levels crept up over time, and i think this is typical and 'classic' for problem drinkers like us, once we have crossed that line into regular, sustained alcohol (and self) abuse. I have the discipline within me to 'control' my drinking level's, but really, the truth is i didn't/don't want to. Why would i? My brain/body chemistry enjoys getting numb and slowly smashed, and 2 or 3 drinks don't do that for me. However, as much as i wouldn't recommend anyone with AF time up go back to drinking via moderation, i also understand that, at least for me, i had to try it again, just to remove any doubt, and i think i can see your reasons for doing so. I only ask you to be vigilant with your drinking, and be safe with it. Be very careful and aware if drinking levels creep up over time, because whilst they may not, they are very likely to from what i know, and see around me. My decision after my little experiment is to continue long term sobriety. I don't enjoy the feeling of having even a little bit of alcohol in my system. I am never at my best, and i see the lie and the myth all too clearly now, that we 'need' AL to socialise, relax, and/or enhance life or others' company. Of course, no-one could talk me out of what i had to do and finally learn and better understand my own relationship with AL, which may be different from your's, but i suspect not. But i respect your decision, and i am not knocking you for it. I wish you safe and happy travels friend.

Best wishes, G-bloke.

[sooty]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Morning Dazzlers, isn't it good to get back to some sort of normality? Only the dreaded new years eve to get thru now and we'll be back on an even keel.

I'm sorry for all of us feeling a bit down, myself included, but the nights will start drawing out and it will soon be spring.

Thanks for the link to the museum Lav, it got me googling and was v interesting. You can learn a lot from being on here .

Have a good day folks