Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

[spedteach]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Beautiful Xmas dinner last night with salmon sent from my sister ala Pike's Place Market in Seattle. Scrumptious!! Followed by hours of hilarious Pictionary.
Son #2 left yesterday. Son #1 plus DIL left today. Still youngens (that's a word, right) dropping in for homemade pizza tonight. Am so happy to be sober. Glad to have a place where my children and their friends like to come to.

Chill, there is a guy in my neighborhood who teaches a class on frugality, how to live on about $4000 a year. He talks about getting rid of stuff, growing, making your own food. He walks everywhere. Know he's extreme but like the idea of working towards minimalism as a way of life.

Rustop, loved thinking of you on the beach this morning. Take care.

Pap,
I work at a homeless shelter twice a week and frequently eat lunch there. We ( the staff and volunteers) are told not to eat with the residents (the men who live at the shelter) and the guests(the folks from the street). We sit at our own table. This is a Christian based shelter. Somebody tell me that's not so hypocritical.

Evening's on it's way. Everyone look for that waxing crescent moon with his girlfriend, Venus at dusk tonight.

[spedteach]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Beautiful Xmas dinner last night with salmon sent from my sister ala Pike's Place Market in Seattle. Scrumptious!! Followed by hours of hilarious Pictionary.
Son #2 left yesterday. Son #1 plus DIL left today. Still youngens (that's a word, right) dropping in for homemade pizza tonight. Am so happy to be sober. Glad to have a place where my children and their friends like to come to.

Chill, there is a guy in my neighborhood who teaches a class on frugality, how to live on about $4000 a year. He talks about getting rid of stuff, growing, making your own food. He walks everywhere. Know he's extreme but like the idea of working towards minimalism as a way of life.

Rustop, loved thinking of you on the beach this morning. Take care.

Pap,
I work at a homeless shelter twice a week and frequently eat lunch there. We ( the staff and volunteers) are told not to eat with the residents (the men who live at the shelter) and the guests(the folks from the street). We sit at our own table. This is a Christian based shelter. Somebody tell me that's not so hypocritical.

Evening's on it's way. Everyone look for that waxing crescent moon with his girlfriend, Venus at dusk tonight.

[one2many]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Lav! Those kiddies are adorable!!!!!! Just beautiful xx

Hi to all the Diligents!!!

[Lavande]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Hey cyn,
Can I put an order in for some felted stuff now that've you've figured it all out? Sounds very cool.
Enjoy your trip to NYC (take an umbrella, heard rain is on the way).

Hi Oney & Zenny - thanks! I was very pleased with the collection of pictures & appreciate the work that it took to get those three kids to sit & smile together

Shelley, I love that my kids & now their kids keep wanting to come back. Makes me feel wanted & appreciated - something I haven't felt for way too long
Glad you had good company!!!

[rustop59]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Good morning everyone

Thank you all for the nice words and good wishes. I know that as animal lovers you can all understand what it is like.

Lav - what adorable grandchildren. You are so lucky. You and Sped should be so proud, you ladies are certainly doing something right when your families want to keep coming back to you. My late MIL spent a number of Christmas's alone (through choice) and daughters, sons etc. would not travel to spend it with her. There are three brothers still living here, all about an hour apart and not one of them has phoned or visited one another for Christmas!!! I used to do it my way until I got burned so now I have stepped back and leave them all at it. My family is the girls and hubby, the outlaws can take a flying @$$$.

Had a lovely walk on the beach yesterday and going to another one this morning. The weather is very mild so taking advantage of it.

Have a wonderful day everyone.

Rustop

[Dewdrop]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Merry Xmas everyone I hope you all enjoyed the holidays, it?s been busy, busy here but I am having a duvet day ? I?ve switched off the mobile and unplugged the landline. I?m hibernating away from the world today so will try and catch up with you all over the next few days.

We had a lovely Xmas and the grandkids were just so excited and happy, at 6, 2+1/2 and 3 you can imagine, the 6 year old was in awe at his presents and so grateful for everything. It?s a magical time at that age. I was at my eldest?s for Xmas dinner (12 of us) and honestly I sooo overate, the food was traditional and delicious but my DIL made three desserts ? a fresh fruit pavlova, individual cr?me brulees with fresh raspberries and a homemade Christmas pudding. Well we all demolished every pud, there were no leftovers! In the evening a few of us went and visited my youngest and his family, they had decided to have a quiet day on their own with their daughter (they are the ones who lost their son recently) and it was a peaceful and relaxing evening after the mayhem of the day. I was initially concerned they were isolating themselves but by the time I left I knew they had made the right decision.

Boxing Day was spent at my parents with some of their neighbours and a few friends dropped by during the day, so lots of tea drinking and more yummy food. I was also given a load of leftovers when I eventually managed to escape last night and I feel a bit like a beached whale today ? hence the duvet day. Although I plan on a long walk on the beach this afternoon as the weather is mild after a few days of very high winds. This is my second AF Christmas and it was a breeze, last year I was quite anxious and had my plan in place for any eventuality. This year I didn?t even think about it, wonderful!

I love the talk of decluttering and minimal living and something I plan to do over the next week, I wonder if it?s something to do with the time of year to have a clear out and sweep away the old year and start a new year afresh? I too seem to have accumulated too many things and at the same time juggle too many spinning plates (mixed metaphor I know but sometimes I really feel as if I am not only spinning the plates but juggling them too!). There is something about the simple life that is very appealing. Much to ponder and reflect on at the moment.

Take care everyone and I'll respond to you all individually soon.

Dewdrop :h

[Chillgirl]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Good Morning Everyone

its so lovely to hear all your stories and I feel I've had a fleeting visit into all your Christmas's. Lav the photos is beautiful! No wonder you enjoy them so much and EB is growing into such a handsome wee guy.

Sped - I'd love to hear more about the guy who teaches minimal living, i don't suppose he has a website? If I could live on $4000 a year my troubles would be over!

Dewdrop - I think you are right about the time of year for decluttering. Somehow I want to start the new one with as clear a picture as I can and getting rid of stuff feels like it gives me more space to do that. I have also felt for a long time now burdened by "stuff" if I could throw everything I own in the back of a pick up and drive off into the sunset Id be happy

This was my 2nd AF Christmas too and I agree I didn't even have to think about it. Strangely I had a drinking dream last night which was not a happy one and I awoke a bit disconcerted.

The high winds have indeed stopped here today and I'm going to take advantage and get another long beach walk in. There has been a weather warning issued for tomorrow when gale force winds are expected.

Im feeling very joyless Im afraid, we have had none of the family get togethers many of you describe. It was just me and I Parents and I wasn't much company. My Sisters don't always get along and one doesn't speak to the others husband, so a group get together is not possible. I got to thinking about what does make me feel joy and I really don't know any more. I can't remember anything in such a long time that brought me any pleasure. I know it sounds terrible to say it but I feel the joy left with AL. I don't seem to have been able to replace my previous social life with anything and Im never any fun these day. When Im with people socially, Im always bored and waiting to leave as soon as I can. Its like my "joy" was surgically removed. Sorry to be on a downer but if I don't speak to you guys I would go crazy.

AND I need names for our jaunt through January!!!! Yes its only a few days till 2012!

[startingover]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Hi Dazzlers

Chillywilly, can I say something here? You ARE a joyful person at least you are when I have been with you. I soooooo know how you feel right now tho. I feel EXACTLY the same. I am so down i dont even really feel like living any more. It will pass tho. And I feckin hope it will be soon.
I think that its because your life is in such a hiatus that you feel this way. Mine too. I have no answers All I can say is that you are not alone in your feelings and I dont think its lack of AL even tho I have so wanted to get out my face just to change how I feel just now.

Sorry Dazzlers for my downer post too. I just wanted to empathise with Chilly

[spedteach]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Morning,
Chill and Starty. Don't dare apologize for being downers. If that's what's going on, so be it. It is what it is.

For me, know at a certain point, I need some alone time. After pizza last night, I went out and walked for an hour or so. Needed to get grounded, back to a place I can trust will always be there. Just me ,by myself, walking. Being with my son and his friends was good but they are leaving this morning.

Chill, know I go on and on about this but gratitude lists really help me. My AA sponsor always reminds me, if nothing else, at least be grateful to be sober. Your spin class, Elle, the beautiful place you live and the possibility of Portugal. Hang in there.

Love, Shelley

[Stargazerlily]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Good morning to all.....

The holidays are such a wild mix of feelings. I was so excited to have family come to stay, then yesterday could barely wait till they left. I acutally ached from all the stress, work, constant visiting. They left, I rested enjoying the quiet, then started in on a day filled with cleaning and laundry. No TV, no music, just quiet. Finally this morning I feel normal. So Chill, do I sound like a lunatic?

Going to visit friends today, have to drive about an hour and a half and it is snowing, that figures. It is pretty though.

Back to healthful eating and exercise, so will feel better and better as the week goes on.

Jammin January, Joyful, help me out here.

[papmom3]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Chill sweetie and Startie-no need to apologize. Part of peeling the onion of sobriety is to feel these feelings we stuffed down and covered up with AL. Pre AFness your joy was artificial. Mine was no doubt. AL is a depressant no doubt but it is also a pain killer. Remember how many times you just desolved in tears for what appeared no reason? The feelings of hopelessness and remorse? Wanting to get somewhere but not knowing how or where so might as well open another bottle?

Without going through these down times we will not figure out where and what we are supposed to be.

I agree with SPED about the gratitude list. Whether you make it in your head before drifting off to sleep or use a journal, it really and truly helps. The blues are so good at hiding what is going right in our lives that we have to forcefully sweep them aside so we can see the good things. Try it for a week straight and see if you don't start feeling better AND start to have a clearer vision of what you need to move towards.

As far as living frugally, just keep in mind the chap who is living on $4000 a year has given up a TON of things we take for granted. Does he have a car and if so, how does he use it? Does he work? Does he have internet or even a phone of some sort? Does he have family? Does he buy birthday/christmas gifts for them? Does he live in town/city where walking to everything makes sense? Does he own or rent?
To live that way is commendable for sure but what would YOU (collectively speaking) be willing to give up to even get a fraction of way near to his lifestyle?

For me, food, oil and car gas alone put me well over 4K a year not to mention electricity and other utilities the city charges. I looked into solar but couldn't afford to buy it outright or to lease it as it would take 2 years to start seeing a profit!! I can't quit my job and you all know I tried so hard to find one closer to home this year so my auto fuel bill will not change except to increase. Could I grow more food in the summer? Possibly but I don't have space big enough for a really substantial garden so at most I would be able to save some money on veggies only just for the summer. i'm not allowed to have chickens so can't harvest my own eggs. I can't sell my house right now so can't move closer to downtown (nor would I want to) or move to a smaller town where there is a true town center where all the services I would need are housed. Where I could cut would isolate me more than I already am and totally cut the joy from my life: Internet, cable, agility, quilting.

So it's a lofty dream and some people do attain it. We can probably do a little something to move closer and most of us already have pared down as much as possible.

Lav-I totally forgot to comment on the GKs!! What an adorable pic and what a nice gift your kids gave you! I love seeing how much the GKs have grown in just over 6 months!!

OK, got to get ready to bring the car in for more repairs (speaking of expenses!!).

[Lavande]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

Good morning all!

If it wasn't for those three cute little kids my life would be joyless too chill...........
I am truly grateful for my sobriety so that I can have complete access to those kids. My life would be pretty empty without them. My parents are long gone, my brothers don't know I exist, my friends have scattered, so has my husband I guess this is just the way life works out. Somehow I had no idea battling lonliness would be such a full time endeavor. Makes me ever so grateful for my MWO friends

A lot of rain is on the way later today so I'll look for something to keep me occupied inside.
Enjoy your long walk chill, rustop! Dewdrop, decluttering sounds like a good way to spend the day - think I'll join you. Starty, I have a feeling we'll all feel renewed in the new year & I'm looking forward to that! Shelley, lets work on our gratitude lists today - our sobriety is #1 on the list!
Star, drive carefully on those snowy roads.

January Jewels, Jive, Jazz........

[papmom3]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

oooh, I like January Jewels!!

[spedteach]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

How about Just January?

[Lavande]

Dazzling and Diligent December - Week 3

That works too Shelley

Hi papmom, we cross posted earlier this morning.
The guy living on $4000/year must be living 'free' someplace. Even a 300 sq ft studio apartment runs over $600/month, utilities, food, car expenses, etc, etc. Maybe he lives in a monastery :H
I couldn't afford to keep my piggy swissy fed on that income :H

Where did my mojo go?????
Better go look for it....