weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

[satz123]

weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

Can someone HELP ME ! I need to stop drinking

:upset:
:new:

[Doggygirl]

weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

ThreeDogNight;1234784 wrote: Have just read my 24 hours book and women's New Beginnings for this day. Said my prayers and will read chapter 3 of the BB today. Yesterday at AA was 12X12 and we read step 11. Today will be Topic meeting. Trying to stay focused on the day.

So grateful for this forum!

TDN
I love this forum too! That was a good reading today. My home group meets at 7AM every day but Sunday. On Thursdays our topic is the 24 Hours a Day reading. So that's what we talked about today! The two things in the reading that really stood out for me is that it's a privilege to be an AA member, and that I still have more work to do on my attitude about service work. I have truly met some wonderful, generous, lovely people in AA. I am honored to be a peer with them. When it comes to service work, I willingly do th stuff I enjoy, but sometimes am not so willing to do other things - things that NEED to be done but that I may not enjoy doing. I hope I can continue to grow spiritually to the point where I am equally willing to do whatever needs to be done. This would be a real maturing step in my life.

misskris76;1234829 wrote: You don't gotta live that way no more! Yay!

Thank the universe for that!!!! What a relief!!!!

satz123;1234835 wrote: :upset:
:new:

satz - looks like you may not be on - line anymore. I hope you come back and tell us what's going on. We all used to drink like crazy people and we have managed to stop one day at a time. You can too.


G - I agree that the 12 Steps provide a great design for living. While they all fit on one page, I find that I develop a deeper understanding of each step as I go along. Hopefully someday, these wonderful values will be a natural part of me without even thinking of it!

Phil - they are having a big New years party at my club too. Then the "Alcothon" with meetings every hour from 1PM until Noon on New Years Day. A meeting about each of the steps over the 12 hours. I know I will be there for at least one meeting during that time! It's a fun and positive way to ring in the new year.

Thank you all for being here.

DG

[auntiegriselda]

weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

Thoughts about AA

Hello all, I'm back on this site after about a year. I abstained from alchohol for most of the year and went to AA for about 5 months. I enjoyed it but I really wanted to try and moderate, plus I had doubts about the value of doing all of the 12 steps. It seemed like some of them didn't apply all that much to me. And I'm not a religious person so constantly talking about a higher power and praying didn't appeal to me at all. I did very much enjoy talking to the other people there and listening to their stories. I liked my sponsor a lot but we didn't seem to make a lot of progress. She said I was trying to sponsor myself. So I quit going. I'm thinking about going back but I know you can't just go and listen and not do the 12 steps. Some of the people in that group are very adamant about doing everything just so.
I'm back to drinking a bottle of wine a day and feeling bad and depressed the next day. I think I have to decide I'm going to be Al free and not even try to moderate because I just can't seem to do it.
My question is do you think I could go to AA and just hang around and not try to get another sponsor? I have also thought about changing to the women's group for my home group. Doggy Girl I remember that you went through a lot before you started AA.
Thanks for listening
Auntie G.

[retteacher]

weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

auntie g: You could certainly try & go to AA & not fully participate. I'm not sure if it'll work out though. It took a long time for me to admit that I'm powerless over alcohol & that my life was unmanageable. I kept drinking (the way you do...at least a bottle a day) until I realized that moderation was not for me. I have to completely abstain. One small sip would send me into binge after binge.

I joined AA 3 years ago after a disgusting drunk in which I needed to go to the ER. At first, I just went to meetings & didn't even identify myself as an alcoholic. I just said: "Hi my name is Mary." I didn't push myself to make friends or get a sponsor. I was open to the AA message, & the steps seemed like something that could help me. I spoke to someone who told me that all I had to do in the beginning was to take step one & admit my powerlessness over alcohol. I did that on March 23, 2009 & haven't had a drink since.

It's been a wonderful sobriety...better & better each day. Except for a couple of passing thoughts, I really don't miss drinking. I didn't push myself, but gradually the AA program became incorporated into my life. I now have friends, a sponsor, am working the steps, & do service. I didn't push myself...I let it happen in its own time.

Try not to overthink. I just went to meetings even though I felt uncomfortable. My program unfolded.

Mary

[Doggygirl]

weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

Hi Auntie. The only requirement for membership is AA is a desire to stop drinking. There is no requirement to attend X number of meetings, to get a sponsor, to take steps, etc. You will certainly encounter people at meetings who found benefit from doing those things, and therefore will encourage you to do them. But there is no requirement.

I always suggest that people try different meetings if you have several available to you. In my experience, each group is different and some will feel more comfortable than others.

At first I really didn't think all the steps applied to me either - I am also not religious. I came to believe what I believe today through sitting in a lot of different meetings and listening to a lot of different people. The main think I wanted was to figure out how to achieve contented sobriety. AA has helped me do that.

Good luck to you!

[auntiegriselda]

weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

Thanks

I appreciate your thoughts Mary and Doggie. When I tried to moderate I didn't immediately start binging after one sip. I'd have a glass of wine out to dinner, then maybe a few days later have another. It sort of just gradually built up to drinking every day. But the problem is that it's still drinking! And I don't feel well doing it. Have been quite depressed too even with my antidepressants.
Thanks for the advise.
I may start back to AA with the women's group and try that. I didn't go there before.
Auntie

[retteacher]

weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

Auntie G: I've certainly heard about that pattern. Starting back w/drinking slowly & having it build. Speaker meetings are great, because I hear about other people's experience. Sometimes it can be very cautionary for me. M

[bear73]

weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

hi auntie griselda - I'm not big on AA - to each their own.

Have you tried SMART they have a website and face to face meeting - no higher power but more cbt style work/toolbox- i find it works for me and i feel stronger and empowered - combined with ' one day at a time' from AA.

[ThreeDogNight]

weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

Hi, Auntie G.
Great that you came back here! The support is so important to me. I never thought that I could get sober, let alone get to day 41! It took rehab to get there --and not my first time--but I now go to AA every day (except Sunday) and I can't tell you how much of a difference it has made for me. I don't have a sponsor yet, but had a temporary one while in rehab, and she called me yesterday. (I had misplaced her phone number.) I was welcomed at her home group and they even invited me to their Christmas party just before I came home. I'd gone to AA before, but did not do any of the work. That doesn't work so well. However, just sitting at a meeting is a reprieve from drinking for an hour. And you may hear just what you need to hear that day. I started back at my women's group on Monday, and that is great, too.
Good luck, and keep posting!

TDN

[bear73]

weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

every time i have moderated recently started with a few - then a few more - etc etc - then back to wasted days hungover and depressed. none is easier than one for me.

[Doggygirl]

weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

auntiegriselda;1234996 wrote: I appreciate your thoughts Mary and Doggie. When I tried to moderate I didn't immediately start binging after one sip. I'd have a glass of wine out to dinner, then maybe a few days later have another. It sort of just gradually built up to drinking every day. But the problem is that it's still drinking! And I don't feel well doing it. Have been quite depressed too even with my antidepressants. Thanks for the advise.
I may start back to AA with the women's group and try that. I didn't go there before.
Auntie

You said a couple of really important things here. Most importantly, you don't feel well with the drinking you are doing. That alone is enough reason to change.

Also, I've heard a couple psychiatrists over the last few years speak about alcohol and depression. And now I'm in school studying to become an AOD counselor, so drugs and despression (and other mental disorders) are a topic there as well. I'll just ask this question: Does it make any sense to take a depressant (AL) and an anti-depressant at the same time?

Of course none of that has to do with AA other than as a group, we can help each other see some of the insanity in what we do around drinking.

DG

[retteacher]

weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

I too am a person who finds 1 or 2 drinks nearly impossible. I've tried that over & over to no avail. Now that I've gone for almost 3 years wo/a drink, it's so much easier to keep on doing what I'm doing. I like that I come out of social events w/the same brain as when I went in (as opposed to scrambled & numb). I'm not complacent, because I see relapsing of long-time members pretty regularly. That: "I'm all better now...maybe I can have just one" message is so seductive. I know it'll take a long, long time for my brain to attain an equilibrium again...if ever. So, in the meantime, I go to my meetings, do my stepwork, & take sobriety one day at a time.

[ThreeDogNight]

weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

Good morning, All!

I too am someone who can't have one or two drinks. And drinking what I was drinking got me into so much trouble. I was prescribed anti-depressants a couple of years ago; took them for a couple of weeks (still drinking), and decided they didn't work. Got a new one last year--same thing. Well, a great therapist I had been seeing recommended Paxil, and I started it just before rehab last month, and it has helped me a lot with the anxiety. I usually resist medication, preferring to take vitamins and herbs, but I was desperate and agreed to try. So glad I did! But you can't expect anything to work if you are still drinking.
Told three friends about my DUI and rehab, and all three were so supportive! Amazing how most people have an alcoholic family member or friend. My friends were also so surprised to hear this--I had become a closet drinker and never drank in public--only in my home, and, unfortuantely, in my car. Never want to go back there!
Will check in tomorrow, but hope everybody has a happy sober New Year's Eve!

TDN

[retteacher]

weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

tdn: I too was a closet drinker. Even my husb didn't know the extent of my drinking. Awful hiding all the time! That was one of the worst parts of my alcoholism.

I haven't told everyone I know about my alcoholism & AA. However, I just recently told 2 women friends about it. They too were so supportive. When the time is right, the news my AA membership comes out.

Tonight will be a wonderfully quiet night w/my husb. Tomorrow a nice potluck w/AA friends before the Sun. night meeting.

M

[Doggygirl]

weekly AA Thread - Dec. 26 - Jan. 1

Hi friends! TDN, so very glad to hear that Paxil is helping you now! Your info about what happened with meds while drinking just confirms everything I've heard about it. Our doctors have a very difficult time offering us meds to help us when we mess it back up with AL. And I don't know about you, but I ALWAYS lied to my doctors about my drinking. So they never even had a chance to consider the impact of AL on any meds they might prescribe, much less offer me up applicable warnings.

I was a "daily relapser" for years and years. I would always wake up saying "not today" but then changed my mind very quickly. I frequently tried to limit myself to "one or two" but that never happened either. After coming to MWO and achieving 60 days AF, I drank again. The first few times seemed pretty "normal." However, it was only a matter of a couple weeks or maybe even less until I was right back to my old tricks. Drinking in secret was one of them.

I am so very grateful I'm not living that way any more. I too find it much easier to just not drink at all. Nothing to worry about that way.

I too have been nervous about telling certain friends of my non-drinking / alcohol dependent status. I have always gotten way more understanding than anything else. What is more fun is telling people I am back in school. Of course they ask what I am studying. When I say "Addiction Counseling" I get some puzzled reactions LOL! I am following my heart and that's all that matters.

The Alano Club is having a pot luck / speaker meeting / dance tonight, followed by the all night Alcathon from midnight until noon tomorrow. I'm opting for a quiet evening at home with Mr. Doggy. Will probably catch a meeting in the morning though.

Happy New Year one and all! May 2012 be a wonderful year for all of us!

DG