Thursday January 22nd

[Andy1111]

Thursday January 22nd

What's up everyone? I used to post a lot here and I am back. Don't have much to say right now, heading into a meeting, but might be back later. Day 4 for me. One day at a time.

[Accountable for Me]

Thursday January 22nd

Hello all - you all sound like you are doing so well!! Keep up the good work!

Macks - it truly is a bitter sweet thing to have aging grandparent, or even parents for that matter. Your granny sounds like she is a pretty positive lady and feels blessed to have you all around for her.

Day 20 for me. I am trying not to get too absorbed in counting the days anymore, because I am feeling it's kind of like a jail sentence and I am serving time for something. But that is just me.

So glad everyone is doing well!

[abby1]

Thursday January 22nd

Good Morning Good Friends in Absville,
Accoutable, I KNOW exactly how you are feeling. But we need to realize that it's not a jail sentence, but a better way of living our lives. I keep telling myself that!!! I think back about all the times I made an ass of myself and that is reason enough to keep putting 0 in the tracker.
Birdman, Ollie, Mack, Pual & New Girl.... where all doing a journey and isn't great to have someone to talk with on the trail of success!!
Day 11 for me, working this morning..... I waiting for the excersie "high" to kick in so I forget about the high of drinking.
xoxoxxo to everyone in Absville.
Abby

[Accountable for Me]

Thursday January 22nd

abby1 - I didn't mean to come off sounding negative. And you are right, it isn't a jail sentence, but it is a way to a better life. I just found over the last few days, that I have been dwelling on the amount of days I have AF. Maybe I just need to find something constructive to do instead of focusing so much on being AF? I do appreciate your point of view. Maybe I am hitting a feeling of being 'complacent'. And I certainly don't want to do that - as we all know what can happen then, eh? So thanks for your kind words! I appreciate them.

[Birdman]

Thursday January 22nd

Life Sentence

Accountable,

I know what you mean about the snetence. I went to the doc yesterdayfor my thirty day check up. I lost 14 pounds and went 23 day AF and had given him the MWO info earlier. I was feeling pretty chipper until he said, "Just remember you can never take another drink of alcohol again." I thought, "Well, I don't know about that. I am not drinking now. I do not want to drink now but I am not putting my self under the pressure of everyday for the rest of my life." It kind of made me sad. It is not that I want to drink or that I miss drinking myself to sleep every night or being hung over every morning but to say I can never under any circumstance regardless of the reason anywhere in the world ever again sip one more drink? I find that thought to be so constrictive it makes me want to have many drinks. I will not but does anyone else understand this rant?

Birdman

[Accountable for Me]

Thursday January 22nd

Birdman - I completely understand your rant! I too, have been told by my doctor I cannot drink ever again. Honestly his words sent me into a tizzy and I ended up drinking more than ever before. The word 'can't' is not a word our brain accepts easily. It makes us feel 'powerless'.

What I have found that eases my pesky brain, is telling myself "I can drink if I want to, but I choose not to right now.." Is this setting me up for failure? Am I living in denial and will I eventually end up hitting the bottle seeing I am not be completely honest with myself. Because, in actuality I cannot drink ever again, if I want to have any kind of life.... My brain won't allow me to accept the harsh word 'can't'. So therefore, I truly have to manipulate it into thinking I can, but I won't.

[Java]

Thursday January 22nd

I agree accountable, and birdman i understand, I know it is not safe for me to drink again, but to think I NEVER can sound kind of harsh, so I am just thinking that i dont want to today and i dont want to tommorow and thats all i really need to know, i will deal with forever at another time!

[wwbarb]

Thursday January 22nd

Hi, all. Quick day 4 for me. Not hard, just yuck. It made me realize that I have to get this sh*t out of my system and move on.

I am thinking going to go down to 100 mg of topa today . I'm not getting enough to eat during the day which is bringing my energy down. Then I am exercising vapidly because I am an all or nothing person so that's zapping me too.

Not to mention my sixteen year old. I am just waiting for the powder keg to blow. Apparently he is getting some not so good advise from a bunch of his friends who are about to turn 18 (he's 16) who are about to get kicked out of their parent's house thinking its a good idea to drop out of high school and get their GED. His grades suck and nothing I do can get him to do his homework (he is one of the most intelligent kids I have ever met). He's thinking he can get a job, get his GED and go to college later or a trade school later after working for a while. He has agreed to go fix his ridiculous haircut today, tho. He thought it would be fun to take his very long dyed black hair while I was gone during Xmas break and shave the sides of it. Now that it's grown some, we are going to do a buzz thing.

Hi to everyone - personals later. I have to get some work done today, but best wishes to all of you if I can't get back.

[Olly]

Thursday January 22nd

Hey all,
yeah Birdman, I can relate to the rant. I too feel this immediate defensive rise when faced by someone telling me what or what not to do. It's just my nature. But, I'm sure your doc meant well. And, as far as never is concerned... like newgirl said, why not worry about that later. Maybe the day will come when you immediately agree to the same comment "yeah, don't I know it" or something to that effect and it won't push your buttons. Maybe not. But, why worry about it now. Now is the time to keep on feeling good..AF!!

Olly

[lucky 2.0]

Thursday January 22nd

Hi all-

Day 23 for me. I just realized I think my tastebuds have changed. I used to eat salty chips to wake up my deadened tastebuds. I just had a small piece of white, mild cheese and it was so salty I could not take another bite. It is the same cheese I have had a 1000x. Weird. Also realize I am not drenching Mexican food in salsa either for the bite of it to startle my tastebuds into perking up and realizing there is some flavor in my mouth. Interesting stuff, @ least to me....

Keep up the fight for abs.

[Birdman]

Thursday January 22nd

Thanks guys

Okay I will stop stewing.

Jay

[Lou]

Thursday January 22nd

Hey all,

day 10 for me....10 days ago i wounldnt have believed it, im so proud of myself and grateful for the support iv recieved here.
Well i tried to go to the gym this morning but its closed due to adverse weather conditions...they had no power and all the trees around were blowing down. we have winds of 100 miles an hour here, its quite scary actualy...my lovely huge back garden is in complete disaray...i have lost most of my fences and theres no point trying to fix it till this wind stops....also i have scaffolding all around my house at the mo as theyve just finished my new roof (thank god theyd finished!) so iv had to park my car in another street as theres all sorts of shrapnel being blown off the scaffolding.....im just waiting for a metal bar to come through the window. It really is bad here!! scared to go out incase i get decapitated by a slate!!!
Anyway...im sure that interested you all!!!
Macks im glad your visit went well...and remember keep your chin up mister...and hi to Lisa too.
Right off to get the dinner started....back later...if im not decapitated in the mean time!!!

Loves

Lou-Lou x x

[weemelonhead]

Thursday January 22nd

Mornin all!!! Nice work on the 'faaaarrrr ooouuutt druidic calender once again pauly, you bonkers old codfish!!
Glad to see you feeling so chipper though .......just hold your kilt down though while you're doing that highland fling will you???? The melon does not need to see a couple of Scottish kiwi fruit whilst she chomps on her muesli!!!!
Olly...yup, right with you on the lethargy trip, I have claimed all the back seats on the bus and am spending the entire journey prostrate!!!!! Am eating really well, and sober as a geranium, but feeling tireder than I ever did under the influence! When you get your gym kick...send me a shovel full won't you???
Avian Hombre...yes, I think I am inclined to stand up and vote with AFM and NGrl with regards to the finger of Buddah pointing out that you can NEVER drink again...I don't think anyone takes to kindly to orders, I think we like gentle persuasion better, and AFM is right, even if you KNOW you can't drink again, and WON"T drink again....keep it secret from your brain ....lull it along for now with a gentle skip in the park, and let the facts creep up by themselves!!! You're doing great! oh, and by the way...salagadoola menchicka boola bibbidi bobbidi boo!!!
New grl and Sammys....you da men...er...gilsl...all this talk of exercise is putting me to shame, I have trouble just raising the energy to get my key out the purse when I reach the front door...soak those muscles chickens!!!
wwbarb...TEENAGERS!!! aren't they 'great???'...when my daughter was your sons age, she had 2 tatoos, multiple body piercings, and half electric blue and half black hair!!!! She couldn't be bothered with school, and her chums were a motley crue to say the least....BUT...have you ever heard that Baz Lurman song sunscreen???? Listen to it, some of the most interesting people he knows are about 54 or something...and they STILL don't know what they want to do with their lives......
Steph is 18 now, and has passed through all manner of phases so far, and is likely to go through a heck of a lot more!!! She has finished school, and is looking forward to a bit of travel, a bit of work, and then deciding later, after she has seen and done a bit, where she feels the 'Pull'....As long as they do not hurt themselves or others, I think it is good for kids to have a bit of space..it can be worrying for us parents if they seem to have no direction, aims or ambition....and although I would not support a sloth, I will support my daughter as long as she keeps moving forward, trying hard to support herself, and learning SOMETHING (wotever that may be??) all the while!!! My thoughts are with you barb......this is a rollercoaster isn't it????????
And last but not leastypoos....Mackyboy and Lisa..yup, there is definitely sweet and sour in the mix for you guys..it will be wonderful to see your family again, and I am sure that your dear Gran will be chuffed to bits with so many of the people she loves around her!! her 'new' room sounds FAB too!!!!!! Hugs to you both...if the family are anything like you two......The Mackeral clan gathering should be a right hoot!!! It must be hard...but I hope you can focus more on the hoot than the hard bits! xxx:h

And to all else who are scampering around absville today.....happy days my friends!!!! xxx

[Popeye]

Thursday January 22nd

Another busy day in Absville, which is always good to see.
Well done everyone on your continued AF days.

Birdman.
I agree with accountable (as usual). Anybody saying 'can't' to me is like a challenge.

Lou. I'm proud of you aswell:wd I heard about your weather on the tv. Sounds scary.

Macks. Glad you're back. Family life is always ups and downs. It's the nature of things. I hope everything
works out for you and yours.

Melon....'as sober as a geranium' brilliant...:H :H

[Popeye]

Thursday January 22nd

Another busy day in Absville, which is good to see.
Well done everyone on your continued AF days.

Birdman.
I agree with accountable (as usual). Anybody saying 'can't' to me is like a challenge.

Lou. I'm proud of you aswell:wd: I heard about your weather on the tv. Sounds scary.

Macks. Glad you're back. Family life is always ups and downs. It's the nature of things. I hope everything
works out for you and yours.

Melon....'as sober as a geranium' brilliant...:H :H