Magical March Madness - Week One

[FlyAway]

Magical March Madness - Week One

Dewdrop--No need to apologize. I get the same way at times with posting online. I do think it's absurd that your grandson's teacher is making such a big deal about the way he holds his pencil. He's only 6 for goodness sake. I feel so badly for your daughter and pray for peace for her.

Blonde--I think you'll enjoy Vale's book. So many interesting points he brings up. It really made a difference in my thinking.

Spedteach--I like "clean and sober" better than "alcoholic" too. I think that fear of being labeled and alcoholic keeps people from trying to get sober. My 8th grade teacher tried to get me to hold my pencil differently too. What a pain in the ass. I hold it between my middle finger and thumb and he insisted that I hold it between my pointer finger and thumb. It didn't make my handwriting look any better and it made me write slower, but it had to be done his way while in his classroom. Ridiculous.

Lav--I can picture you being an advocate for your son and telling the teachers a thing or two! :H Have a great day at Longwood Gardens.

Today is a lazy day at home for me. It's beautiful outside and I've got nothing on the agenda. Gotta love that!

[cyntree]

Magical March Madness - Week One

Greetings all - I'm happily back home, and anxious to catch up with all the news - sounds like there has been a ton of happenings, discoveries, and movements.

Dew - fortunately you have educators at the ready here on the thread! When my great-niece was 4 she taught herself to write - which she does from right to left, in mirror image. Her folks are still trying to figure that one out...I haven't heard how it is going now that she is in kindergarten.

Hope all who are suffering are feeling better, and Chill I look forward to reading about your news. Lav - I remember when you first posted the link to Longwood Gardens here - so beautiful. Hope you have a lovely day there.

Uuuugh, into catch-up mode with all things, taxes included, which I didn't get done before leaving. Will check in later ---

[Rusty]

Magical March Madness - Week One

Hi Gang,

Thank you for giving me the needed space I needed.:l It's been a rough 4 days for me emotionally. Thank you all for your concern. I really appreciate it.:h Part of my despair was that, in the past with this exam, we were not allowed to review the incorrect answers so we could figure out where we went wrong. Sunday evening, my ex-beau, an attorney, called me out of concern and told me that when he took the bar exam...you could ask the Examining Board to see your test answers so you would know where to focus the next time you took the exam. He insists that this situation is no different. My Brass Ovary is ready to fight! I will e-mail the oversight bureau and ask to see the results....he also suggested I ask them to assign a second person to score my exam as I was SOOOO close to passing. He's a good guy in a lot of ways. I know he still loves me.

Blonde-you asked how many times I tried to stop drinking before I finally did. I can honestly say that I had never tried stopping before. My drinking problem started very late in my life....in my mid-forties. I had always been a very moderate drinker before. My plunge into darkness was fast and furious. My drunkfree anniversary is May 28, 2010. I dabbled with moderation but prefer to be AF...which I happily am. I don't want to play with fire. Sure, I could TRY moderating....but hell, who knows how long it would last and then I would go back to a sad, dark place that was terrifying. NEVER GOING BACK THERE! My mom knows I have an online support group but she is the only one in my family who knows. I told my closest friend about this site.

Regarding the term "alcoholic." Nope, refuse to use it. Negative, and talk about a stigma. I absolutely hate it when you meet someone for the first time and they say "I am an alcoholic." Is that how you want to define yourself???? Is that the first thing you want people to know about you???? Oh yes, it's happened to me MANY times when I've met people for the first time....say at a wedding or a community function. This happened between 1985-2000....and this was wayy before AL ever became a problem in my life. Dill, I like your approach. I prefer to say I had a problem with AL and I prefer to be AF. Was my problem obvious to my family and friends? YES. So whether I moderated or abstained....it didn't matter to them as long as I was in control, they got the old Rusty back (not the under-the-influence loony Rusty), and I was not abusing myself. Initially, they thought rehab was the most effective treatment (ummm....depends on whether you want to get help....again, STIGMA).

Other terms I refuse to use and get royally p-o'd when anyone else uses them...."drunk" and "alkie."

In business, I think it's best to keep the fact that you're in recovery to yourself. The reason is.....I think when people know you've had a problem with AL in the past....even if you've been sober for years.....the first thing people tend to think when you are legitimitely sick is...."oh, he/she must have fallen off the wagon." I say this based on my experience over the last 30 years in all types of fields/business venues (I've had about 6 careers). There is a stigma with being labeled an alcoholic and whether you define yourself in that way or not, I think unfortunately, other people do.

Can you see I've stopped bawling and I'm back to my usual self???:H

I am working with a new client this week. I'll be back later so I can tell you how much I love you guys...again....thanks for being here for me.

Dew-I think your grandson's teacher is way off. I'm a leftie and I don't curl my wrist when I write, I turn my paper sideways. The way your grandson writes is the way he feels comfortable.

A big warm hello to everyone else!

[FlyAway]

Magical March Madness - Week One

Rusty I didn't realize you were studying for the bar. I'm glad that your ex is in your corner. It sounds like he's a big help. It's ludicrous to not be able to review what you got wrong! I'm glad that you're back and feeling better.

[Rusty]

Magical March Madness - Week One

Fly-no, I'm not studying for the bar. My ex is an attorney and his point was that if an examining board for the state bar association can get access to a law student's score, than I should be able to get mine for the field that I am in.

[Chillgirl]

Magical March Madness - Week One

Evening guys

Rusty - SO good to have you back and hear you are taking action, this ex sounds like he really has your best interests at heart, how wonderful to have his support, no chance of any re-kindling of romance?

I wholeheartedly agree with you on how negative it is for people to define themselves as "alcoholic" what a terrible affirmation that is! With increasing awareness of we get what we think about this stinks of reason to fail. Sped how great to hear your group use "clean and sober", thats what we want to put our attention on.

Dew - I echo the other replies regarding your Grandson's writing and we are lucky to have a great wealth of experience on this thread. Perhaps you should tell his teacher he's going to be a Doctor..... no one can ever read their writing anyway!

Lav - I keep forgetting to mention that adorable photo of Lily in her party dress, someone said she looks like a Princess and that perfectly sums her up, absolute Royalty! She already has great presence.

Cyn - welcome back.

It's turned really cold again here with high winds and sleet....yuk. It's weird to think im on a 4 week count down at work and with only one more pay to come its going to be a challenge. I have enough saved to support myself and pay rent for 2-3 months in which time I will have to find work. I should probably be terrifed but Im just looking forward to the adventure of someplace new......

[Lavande]

Magical March Madness - Week One

Welcome home cyn & good to see you back Rusty

Chill, I have a feeling you will make the most of your adventure
Sorry to hear your weather is turning on you again. I almost hate to say that it's supposed to hit 60 degrees here tomorrow & 70 on Thursday - yay!

Have a nice walk through the conservatory at Longwood today with my girls
Here's a bit of color for you -



Now - doesn't that make you feel better??

[papmom3]

Magical March Madness - Week One

Hey marchers!

Rusty-so good to see you back and your feisty self!! You kick ass with that exam board you hear???

Lav-gorgeous pics, thanks for the eye candy!

Chill-I think you have the best attitude for this new adventure AND you've saved up a little cushion. Good on you!! You should be proud!!

SD-I'm with Lav on the hormone headache. Hopefully will be gone soon.

My meds came finally but will take time to kick in. Meanwhile I felt pretty bad today so am hitting the hay. My neph is doing well after the extractions under anethesia.

See you all tomorrow!

[rustop59]

Magical March Madness - Week One

Good morning everyone

Back to the rain here, give me frost any day of the week.

Lav - your beautiful colourful photos were just what I needed to cheer me
up this cold and dreary morning.

Cyn - welcome back from your travels.

Your too Rusty, good to see you back to your old self. I agree that it great that
you have your ex in your corner and looking out for your best interests.

Dew - I agree with the others. He should be left alone, years ago here they forced
anybody left-handed to write with the right hand, madness. A friend of mine who
had a daughter who held her pencil differently and who's writing was all over the place, turned out to have hypermobility syndrome. Now this kid has all sorts of different
issues but it took them 13 years to diagnose that. It means she now can use a laptop
in school. Just thought I would throw it in there.

Papmom - glad the meds came. You take care of yourself. How is DD's sore?

Star, Dill, Sooty, Chill, Sped, Fly, Blond and anyone else I missed happy hump day.

Rustop

[Stargazerlily]

Magical March Madness - Week One

Good morning to all...

I had the day from hell yesterday, ached all over, felt nauseous, but made it through my day. I took extra vitamin C, 2000 mg, two days in a row. An attempt to not get my husband's cold, and I wonder if the extra vitamin C made me sick and achy? Feel a little better this morning, have to go to work, yikes.

Dew, of course all schools want kids to be cookie cutter alike. It is a huge problem, but in the States, they all have to pass tests, so have to be taught to the test. They will try to have your grandson conform, that is one reason many people home school, or use alternative schools. I am glad I am out of that, as my son always struggled. I agree that your DIL needs time to grieve, and it will not be over any time soon. Sending you healing energy and support.

Chill, wow, you will certainly be ready to go, with the exciting weather in your area. I know it has been a real challenge for you with the harshness of the winter. Amazing that you saved a couple of months' rent and have made the decision to move. I admire you for your courage to find something better. I was laying in bed thinking of how sick I am of Midwest winter weather, this area, etc. I feel stuck due to being buried in my house financially. You on the other hand say, I am leaving, going from this place. Good for you. No regrets. Let's continue to focus on positive affirmations and blessings in our lives.

Sped, you do so much good work, it is so great to hear from you. I agree, constantly being forced to say I am...something negative is so counterproductive. I love the I am clean and sober phrase and can say it is so much more healthy. If I wanted to start running/walking, do you have a good book or program to recommend? thanks

Pap, so sorry you are sick again, wow, that stinks. Take care of yourself girl.

Lav, thank you thank you thank you for the lovely pictures of flowers, I am so looking forward to spring. It is going to be in the high 60s today. I will be in side working, but will take time to peek outside.

Cyn, welcome back.

Rusty, do what you have to with the testscore. I think that tests like that are way too emphasized, but it is what it is. I am glad you are back emotionally, you are strong and fun. I agree with your views on sharing personal info on drinking. It is no ones business, and people WILL judge you, so keep it to yourself. A shame, but so true. Alcohol adds nothing to life, it just takes away.

Hello to Rustop, fly, blonde, dill, and all!

[dill]

Magical March Madness - Week One

Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them - that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.
Lao Tzu

Those pictures did make me feel better, Lav! Thank you. Those flowers are have the affect of making me appreciate change. If not for constant change we would not have the beauty of those blooms. Just recently I have been down and it has to do with change. Generally I am very accepting of change in my life. I know there is no stopping it and acceptance is the key to surviving it. But every now and again it knocks me for a loop. I recently came across some old family videos while clearing my desktop computer of important files. The old videos transported me back to a different time in my life and I missed that time and the feelings and activities and people that were a part of it. Long changed and nothing to be done about it. Still, I was saddened. I'm moving on, as there is no other way to move, but the flowers, they really helped! :thanks:

Looking at one of the videos in particular I saw myself sitting with a beer in my hand at a family picnic at our home. I remember the day and also that I was buzzed. So I was uncomfortable watching the video and looked at it critically to see if I looked and acted "ok". That made me sad, too, that I was going thru that mental exercise while watching a simple family video. This is probably the core of my real sadness. Anyway, I decided in the end that I did look and act ok, but it didn't change things because I know inside that I was not OK. I was ok in that I still thought the whole process of drinking socially was ok. But, I also know that I was drinking more than socially. I was dependent. That vidoe was taken before I decided to quit.

Marching onward now. Thank you for indulging me. I have no place else to offload these thought and emotions.

Have a happy af Humpday!

[Lavande]

Magical March Madness - Week One

Happy Humpday Marchers!

Glad the flower pics brightened up everyone's day just a little

I'm off to Curves now ~ will be back. Looking forward to 60 degrees today :yay:

Lav

[BlondeAFAmbition]

Magical March Madness - Week One

Hi Peeps!

Chill, I really admire your courage for such a big change in your life. I know you have been wanting this for a while and I am so happy for you! Best of luck with the move, I am sending you blessings that everything will be smooth for you! :l

Lav, those flower pics are lovely...nature sure is amazing, isn't? I swear I could look into a flower...really LOOK into it like I was going to paint it a la Georgia O'Keefe style, for hours. It is remarkable how nature designed them with just enough of a launching pad for a shaggy bee to pollinate!

I'll chime in on the anti-alchoholic label sydrome myself. I would never say in public that I am an alcoholic. I haven't been pressed to say anything about it really. I told my husband that I am simply not drinking anymore because it does not agree with me. And that's what I will tell family members too. As for friends and co-workers, I really don't think I need to say much. I don't work with a bunch of heavy drinkers or even a group of office comrades who go out afterwork on Fridays for a beer...I work in a health food store and there really isn't that sort of environment there, thank goodness! So, I will not label myself as an alcoholic to anyone and I am keeping my problem to myself other than the outlet of MWO, which has been a godsend. I don't think it's anyone elses business anyway and hubby understands that I just prefer not to drink! He does and that is his choice, but I notice he is drinking less now that I am not joining him.

I did notice last night after he put out the recycling bins that they were almost half of what is usually in there...none of my BIG wine bottle peaking out. No need to arrange the paper recycling on top to cover the plethera of bottles...NICE! Now, the neighbors may think I have an issue with diet soda but so be it! :H

Star, sorry you had such a rough day yesterday with illness! Wasn't it nice of Lav to post our favorite blossom (stargazer was the middle pick I think?) Sending you healing vibes my friend.

Cyn, welcome back!!! Good to see you!

Rusty, sounds like you are in better spirits! Amen! Hope you have a great day!

To everyone else, Pap, Dill, Fly, AlmostFamous, Shue, Rustop, Det, Kas, Dew, LBH, Sunshine and anyone I missed, have a LOVELY DAY! Today is the start of my 3rd week sober...loving life!

[sooty]

Magical March Madness - Week One

Happy humpday Marchers, interesting reading on here. Sorry i've been AWOL, had lots of things going on, new carpets and some horrible dental work!

I did manage to get to my appt with my meditation teacher on Monday and we were talking about change and learning acceptance of the things we can't change. I think I spent a long time feeling resentful and angry and I sought refuge in booze - the being numb that Dill was talking about earlier.

I guess that feelings are good, even if they're uncomfortable, if you see what I mean. Better we experience the full gamut of emotions rather than live life with only part of our minds aware of what's going on.

My best wishes to all of you, thanks for being part of this fascinating journey with me.

See you tomorrow :l

[Lavande]

Magical March Madness - Week One

Sooty on Hump Day
I have found that once we truly convince ourselves that our feelings won't kill us living AF is a very pleasant experience

I am happy to report that I've finally broke thru my 18 day weight loss plateau & lost 1 more pound :yay:
I was getting just a wee bit frustrated because I've been pretty damn good sticking to 1200 calories daily & exercise most days :H :H

Have a great day!!!