Monday January 22nd

[Java]

Monday January 22nd

Okay i must brag, my boys are going to the SUPER BOWL!!!!!!!!!!!, I was rooting for the Saint and the Colts, at least one of my teams won!

Anyway Morning to everyone, seems like everyone is is their normal spirits, especially Fan!!!!! You guys crack me up, Paul you are still my hero..dont worry and quit beating yourself up, You have said so much stuff to me that has pulled me through these past ten days, and we are only human, meaning we all make mistakes, otherwise we would not have gotten ourselves in this situation i the first place.

I am on day 10 AF today. Very excited about that fact, still on all my supps and the topa, woke up ran again this morning, however I was a little sore from yesterday, see yesterday mornign I could not sleep, so at 5 A i had this bright idea to break out this Tao bo (sp) exercise dvd I bought a year or so agao and only used once and decided I would do it (i usually rest and dont exerccise on sundays) well all, i am paying for it today!!!!! Holy crap I am sore. And if you would like something funny to picture. Picture this, a 23 year old with no coordination trying to kickbox in her living room at 5am with two cats who think she is up early to play a game with them!!!!

Oh dear...I have such a very interesting life sometimes, much more interesting when I decide to wriite it down i notice. I am off now, seems i have work to do (funny how that seems to pop up when I am at work)

Love to you all,

Victoria

[Java]

Monday January 22nd

Hey Becca good morning, Holy craap could you believe that Game!!!!! We were posting a the Same time. have a great Day, i will be on Later.

Victoria

[YoungAtHeart]

Monday January 22nd

Back to Day 1 for me too, although fortunately, I don't consider it a complete washout. There's a little triumph in the failure.

I will not do my long usual diatribe. Short version: Fight with Maddy about cleaning her room and bathroom. I found the end of a bottle of vodka (just enough for a small drink) that my sister had not hidden well when she left for NY. Had a drink. Found courage and removed daughter's laptop from her possession and refused to return it until room was cleaned to my satisfaction. I went back to AF wine and started knitting some leg warmers and finished watching football. Room got cleaned up and computer was returned. The end.

I feel like an idiot for drinking, and yet I did accomplish something--setting a limit with my daughter. It's pathetic that I needed a drink to do it. I'm upset that I broke my AF days, and I feel more than a little sheepish about telling you all, but I can't say I that I don't feel gratified that her room is clean, either. Goal for next time is to do it AF. Maddy is so manipulative about stuff like this, that she can talk circles around me.

Oh well, the bottom line is back to Day 1.

Cashy, don't feel too bad. Have you tried nicotine replacement? It can really help. That's how I quit a long time ago.

Gem, I've been known as a party girl too. We'll have to have a party here on MWO again. A good way to cyber party without alcohol!

Ilex, good luck with the opening of the pub! Good luck rising to the challenge!

Olly, you didn't do badly with the party. You learned a lot about yourself as well!

I agree, SeaBreez, moderating is hard work!

Sorry about the party Becca, keep on putting one foot in front of the other, honey. And thanks for commiserating about the Saints. It's not too bad really. They did better than ever before, and the Bears just outplayed them. At least the Colts won!!!
Georgia;">
Newgrl, I am going to imagine that you are exercising for both of us! At 23, I am completely envious of your energy! You go girl!

Paul, just stop it now!! You're the best! I'm worried at how much you're beating yourself up. What's the point?

Bear, I think you are on the right track. You seem to be thinking a lot of interesting stuff as you keep on this road of sobriety. I think you're going to do well, and if you make mistakes, you will learn a lot from them.

Anyway, it's off to get ready for work for me.

Hugs to all!
Kathy:l

[Olly]

Monday January 22nd

Hey Kathy,
we can walk together... I'm officially on Day 1 again too!

Olly

[Popeye]

Monday January 22nd

Hi All

I'm feeling better now. There's no point worrying about past lapses.I've got to carry on making a better life for myself.
I really am doing rather well. I'd never have thought 2 months ago that I was capable of staying sober for three weeks.
Olly The night out was arranged for Saturday night.
I couldn't go (thankfully) as I was getting a central heating system fitted.
However, when the guys had finished, I went straight round to the shop and bought some Vodka.
I don't know why. I only know that I felt really useless after it. Anyway , that's history now. Onwards and upwards to better things.
Thanks Fan, Cash, Olly, Gem, bear, Ilex, Pebbles, SeaBreez, becca, Victoria, Macks, Lush, Debh, stoatqueen, Lou, Birdman, Kathy, Kizzy, Gina, vinophile, Changeling, Kitkat, lisa, Nancy, Andy,Paula and anyone I might have missed. My pity party is well and truely over.

[Olly]

Monday January 22nd

Oh, good Paul! I'm smiling ear to ear for you. You da Man.
Olly

[lucky 2.0]

Monday January 22nd

Today is Day 27!!! Can you believe it???

I am waiting for the period to kick in where I no longer think about traveling down the vino aisle @ the store or having a glass, or bottle of cab with pizza. But, until it does, I will keep up the good fight.

My best to all. We can do this.

xooxoxo,
lucky

I have tried for @ least 5 years to get to this place of abs success. The difference this time is all of you @ MWO, supplements as outlined in RJ's book, Alan Carr's book, and Campral. It is still early in the game and I have to visualize continued success. RJ wrote in her blog the importance of writing down your goals. That is also key. I have heard that 1000x from life coaches.

[lorisunshine]

Monday January 22nd

Good morning to all of you.
I wasn't able to get on the boards yesterday. We are still cleaning out stuff in my moms house. We will be doing it for month at this rate.

I am starting my 22nd. day AF, but it has been a real struggly this past weekend. I hope it has something to do with not coming on this site. I think I am getting addicted to all of you guys and there is no known cure to menkind. Ahhh, just think, you are stuck with me until I get too old to hit the keyboard or until I get Alzheimers, whichever comes first.

I congratulate you on all your triumphs and setbacks. We should consider our slips as exercises in affirming how we do not wish to live. They are just little reminders how much worst we have been feeling, before we started this journey.

I love you all and wish you a successful day, whatever that means for you.
Love Lori.

[vinophile]

Monday January 22nd

Good Morning,
I,too, am on day one again;dissappointingly after only 6 day AF. Drank 2 glasses of wine last night after a phone call from my mother.She is 80 and lives alone but is becoming increasingly forgetful. It is really elderly dementia but she gets angy at me when she can't remember something and then blames me.She blames me for taking things from her house which she has misplaced and it truly unnerves me. And depresses me as I know this situation will not get better.
Anway after an episode last night I dove into a bottle that my husband had opened. Fortunately there was only 2 glasses left or I would have had more. And, Ollie, I too spent some time obsessing about whether I should open another bottle or not. You see I was really not happy with just two glasses. I guess what AA says is true. You really have to "think beyond the first drink" as we know what lies on the other side of the first one.It is really exhausting to try and moderate!!! I would have been better off had I listened to the relaxation cd's or just gone to bed and read but as a knee-jerk reaction I drank.....phoey!!!!!!

So now instead of just being upset about my mother(or more accurately my helplessness in this situation) I am upset that I drank as well. I feel like my own worst enemy.
I have to take my mother for some banking this afternoon and it will not be easy as she is vey agitated this morning. I am also very aware that some of you(Lori I know) are grieving over the recent loss of a parent. This makes me feel doubly guilty as I know my time with her is limited.I know I should have more patience.
OK my bitch session is over. I feel better already
Wish I could address you all.
Janet

[Popeye]

Monday January 22nd

Hi Lucky and Lori
Well done both of you.
Hi Janet. I'm Glad you feel a bit better.
I think you're doing OK.

[Accountable for Me]

Monday January 22nd

Good morning Absville! A lot going on this morning here on the boards. The weekends can be such a challenge, but keep your chins up and keep trying if you had slipped!!! For those of you who stayed AF, congrats on your continued success. Day 24 for me.... cannot believe it. Made it though a hurdle of weird emotions over the last few days. Going to stay with my dad and his wife tonight to break out of this monotony. He said he was concerned because I have been sounding depressed lately. Nice to know he cares. I think I just need a change of scenery for a day or two to pep me back up.

Like Tawny said in one of her posts, something to the effect, 'Either drink too much, or think too much. Don't know which one is worse'. I really think this is my problem! (Smart woman you are Tawny!)

To those of you who are feeling down, my heart goes out to you. :l And just know it will get better.

[Andy1111]

Monday January 22nd

Hey gang,
Day 8 AF after my failed mods and my initial two weeks AF. Feeling a lot better. One little thing I wanted to admit: I've been on Lexapro (anti dep/anxiety pill) for anxiety and Klonopin for about three years now. I am convinced my anxiety/panic attacks have gone up because of my drinking.

Now that's stopped drinking again, my anxiety levels have gone way down. I am using the Klonopin (which is basically valium/xanax) to help me feel better when I am craving alcohol or having panic attack. I know it's really addictive, but I don't truly feel addicted. At any rate, I've read that it can help long term drinkers wheen themselves off the boozes. It certainly helps, of course, along with supps and the Campral.

Anyway, just wanted to relay that advice.

Overall, doing well, the first week was full of ups and downs and on Sunday I felt a little empty without drinking beer during the Pats game. However, I did not drink this weekend. Big test for me tonight, Tues and Weds as my wife is away. I plan on doing some cooking, watching some TV and maybe hitting the gym. I'll check in if I have any problems.

Paul--don't feel bad about the slip. I think a lot of us "beat up on ourselves" way too much here. We need positive support, not negative.

Andy!

[Birdman]

Monday January 22nd

28 days and counting. I was really stressed out last week about a birthday party on Saturday with a bunch of old friends who I hadn't seen in 20 years. Our drinking back then was truly legendary and I knew I was in for the temptation of my life. I managed to to survive the evening alcohol free because what I was not aware of was that all of my rowdy friends had settlee down and noone drinks anymore. There ws no drink to be had. Alot to worry over nothing.

I am using the hyno cds and I don't notice anyone writing about them. I was wondering if anyone else is using them or tired them and what your opinions are.

Birdman

[rivergirl]

Monday January 22nd

To all of you Your support is so wonderful and positive. I am still Af at 23 days but I know form my past experience that I could slip at any time (Then I will need to remember the pick your self and dust yourself off- get back on the band wagon myself) How many years I have wasted from staying down after a slip. Oh if one minute of experience can be remembered before a slip - how much trouble I could have saved myself.

Thanks to you all for your honesty and posting - you are strength to me.
Rivergirl

[wwbarb]

Monday January 22nd

Day 8 for me - made it through the weekend thanks to being busy, busy, busy with fun stuff, no alcohol in sight.

To those of you who slipped, it is part of the process - if you learned from it, great.

To all of you in double numbers, thanks for inspiring us.

Kathy, my teen almost drove me to the bottle last night. He packed his stuff and left. Half an hour later was back with no where to go. His room is not clean.

Gotta get back to work.