That was a powerful moment for me too Unwasted. I'm really glad you posted about it. It brings back important memories. There used to be a lot of "sting" in the word alcoholic for me. Something I feared. Something I wished and hoped I wasn't. Now that word has zero emotional power over me. It's a fact of my life - a condition I have to manage by not drinking alcohol. The later years of my drinking. (well, actually many many years of my drinking) were filled with secrecy. Filled with things unsaid and truths unspoken. NEVER talking about my inner struggle with alcohol. Saying things out loud has been SO freeing. Typing stuff here at MWO was such an important start. SAYING it all has been another level of freeing.
I'm glad you are enjoying the meetings. I have learned so much about myself and about life around those tables, and the lessons continue for me. So many of my human relationships were affected by alcohol. I didn't really learn how to relate to people beyond the superficial. If someone made me mad (i.e my husband) I drank. Happy? I drank. Etc. I love the fact that around the tables, I am recognizing emotions and learning (slowly) how to really deal with life. What a gift. Now when someone says something that evokes a reaction in me, I immediately recognize the opportunity to learn something new about myself.
DG
Comment