tuesday morning

[bear73]

hello everyone - well day 3 af today for me.Was offered wine 3 times last night and still said no.
I didn't say no to birthday cake though, or to eating too much Indian Takeaway - working on that this week, Quick run tonight, gym class tomorrow,gym Thursday and a class Friday.
I will stick to my calorie allowance too - checked weight chart and am currently on the border between overweight/obese.
It's great to be back I feel clearer already - apart from this lingering cold I've had for about 3 weeks that never quite breaks out.
Just working on the weight this week, realsied few things from my lst time AF.
Not to do things out of fear of not fitting in (whether that's skipping gym to see friends (can always go along later) or eating too much unhealthy food or drinking/smoking.Obvious - I always knew it but now i feel it if that makes sense
If i lapse not to give up, but to look at why - I knew this,and tell everyone else this, but am not very good at applying to self. Usually I would beat self up, for example if i smoked i would then stress about it ,eat loads of junk and skip gym - convince myself i was a total failure and couldn't change.It's destructive but also in a bizarre way avoids fear of failure. If I 'choose' to give up it's a conscious decision - not really but avoids trying,it being hard,failing and having to pick self up. Also ultimate fear of what if i can't really do it.
anyway as I'm superaware of this thinking pattern hopefully it won't trip me up again.
good morning to you all xx

[YoungAtHeart]

tuesday morning

Well done, Bear--you must be proud of yourself! You are also gaining some great insights into yourself as well. It is a good thing not to add insult to injury and turn a minor transgression into a major setback! I know that I have sure done that before. If you do slip up a little with food, for heaven's sake, don't beat yourself up--it's never helped anyone to do that!

At any rate, I have just learned that I have to do a rush job on my income taxes to apply for financial aid for Maddy's college. We've already missed two deadlines. Obviously, these folks expect you to do your taxes in early February! How repulsive! So that's what I'm going to be doing for the next several days. Fortunately, I have all the info pretty much in one place, so it will be only slightly irritating instead of pulling-out-your-hair frustrating. Still, there are other things I'd rather be doing, for sure!

Otherwise, I'm okay. It is good to be getting back to normal after the ice storm and drinking and etc. and to have a clear head again. Anyway, I'm just going to scan the rest of the boards and then get down to my taxes. Ugh!

Hugs,
Kathy

[YoungAtHeart]

tuesday morning

Where is everyone today???? :-0

[bear73]

tuesday morning

just what i was thinking..off for a run in a mo so will check out boards later on.so nice to not be hungover day 3 af and loving it xx

[dilayne]

tuesday morning

HI Bear and Kathy, and all to come!
Kathy, have fun with the taxes (holding my nose!!! :0)
Bear, woo hoo on saying no-way to the wine!

I'm doing OK..no problem with abs really except visiting my sisters this weekend...part of me would have liked to have drank with them, but then seeing one of them get drunk and be annoying..and provoking her 21 year old son by not listening to him and arguing with him...well, I was glad I was sober and that I didn't have to engage in that dialog...She had visited last year and we drank too much together and we ended up having one of those long drunken circular dialogs that left both of us confused and emotional..no one heard the other..anyway, I don't miss the insanity at all. I was also a little annoyed when she offered my 21 year old daughter wine..she just assumed that she would want to drink (she allows her's to..and has since before they were of age) My daugher really didn't want to..and hasn't ever drank in front of me..I told her she could if she wanted to..but I knew that she REALLY didn't care to...so, you know how family can be..always a little revealing. I enjoyed our visit very much, but was very glad that I didn't succumb and that I didn't have to engage on that level.

Have a good day everyone..especially if you get the holiday (I don't!)
X0X
Di

[rivergirl]

tuesday morning

Bear, Good job with your running and gym class - you go girl. Young good luck with your deadline and good morning! Dilayne, Your story about family interaction hit a note with me- families have so much power over us. Mine is a drinking family but it is all wound up in expensive wine and good whiskey so it is supposed to look classy. I've been a little depressed the last few days- not exactly sure what's going on - 52 days AF today and at least no cravings though.

Cheers,
Riv

[dilayne]

tuesday morning

HI Rivergirl...funny you mention 'classy'...my sister thinks she is a class act above others...that was some of the irony of it all, I could see that class has nothing to do with anything..and all the crystal wine glasses in the world can't change that! Excellent job on the 52 days as well!!!
Di

[Popeye]

tuesday morning

Hello All,

A pretty uneventful day today, which is not a bad thing.
No problems, no anxiety, I just drifted along to the present moment.
I'm at ease and it feels good.
I hope you all have a nice night.

[Lou]

tuesday morning

HELLO!!!

Hi to everyone here in absville...and well done to you all for your own achievements.
Well i aint done much today...didn't get up till 1.30 pm!!! but i'm still having trouble sleeping i didn't get off till past 4am.
Anyways...got my act together and went the gym..have managed to increase my cardio to 2 hrs...major achievement. Still waiting to see the results tho...I'm counteracting it tho as the anti depressants I'm on at the moment increase your appetite and I'm not supposed to take them till i go to bed as theyre supposed to help me sleep!! But i find myself waking up in the night starving...so i eat and then I'm wide awake again!! Something i think i need to discuss with my GP as i do get very depressed when i put on weight ( i have been anorexic in the past due to being the "fat kid" who was bullied at school).
Its annoying me as i feel its holding me back...everything else in my life is falling in to line and now i have the weight issue again...maybe i just have to find something to pick on myself about??!!
But still i am good and happy...day 43!!!!

Loves to all

Lou-Lou x x x

[Java]

tuesday morning

Sounds like everyone is having their ups and downs today, me included. I am on day 39, I am excited that I have made it this far...but it is a struggle to deal with knowing i have certain occasion to deal with i would have never thought twice about before.

I am running a half marathon this coming weekend, and we have decided to stay in the city we are going to through the weekend, I have told one of my bestfriends I am going with that I am not drinking (she thinks it is cuz i quit smoking, and that i have a better chance of staying smoke free if i dont drink for a couple of months after i quit smoking...heheheh tricky tricky me.) But I am quite nervous about going because the two i am going with dont go out and party all the time, so when they do, they like to have a really really good time, so i will have to be really really strrong. I know I can do it, and there is no way i would want to mess up all the days i have added up AF, so i would appreciate everyone putting your superhero powers together this weekend (sat-tues) for me, so i can have superhuman strength in all the bars and night clubs i will have to deal with. I know i can have just as much fun sober, heck, i can have more fun, i wont be dehydrated, sick, have a headache, feel bad, need recovery time, i will be able to enjoy my vacation, and I wont have to worry about regretting anything i do, cuz i know i did it all sober and with a clear mind. Okay, i think i just totally talked myself into being okay....cool!!!!

Thanks for listening to my crazy rant!!!!!!!!! Oh, and by the way....I love you guys


Victoria

[Lou]

tuesday morning

Victoria

Superhuman powers already on charge for you honey.....ill throw them at you fully powered on sat. You can do it!! x x x

[angieUK]

tuesday morning

Hi victoria you answered your own ? xxx really good luck x xx x

[Accountable for Me]

tuesday morning

Well it is a later post for me than usual... although I am not posting here (ABS) daily anymore. I had a very good day mood-wise. I think I have snapped out of my bout of depression. It was a LOOOONG week of battling the blues but today I have been consistently happy, so I am hoping it is over with.

Met my daughter's new daycare provider. Give her the big ol' thumbs up. :thumbs: I was so nervous and stressed about placing my daughter in daycare. But it is the only way or we will be banging on the 'poor-house's' door in the near future. She has only been with me, and I know it is selfish, but I didn't want her to be with anyone else. :dunno: I had a good 'interview' with this woman, and Hailey was in there like a dirty shirt. She didn't want to leave when it was time to go so, I must say it is good all around. At least I will feel comforted knowing she will be happy and will be taken very good care of. I will start her in slowly over the next couple of weeks. A relief in many ways. Oh! Shoot! Now that means I will actually have to start working!! LOL!

Oh - life changes so fast doesn't it??

Day 53 for me. You know it is funny how the addicted brain works. Here I was all proud and happy I have this huge part of my stress dealt with and I was thinking on my way home that I should celebrate with some wine. Then it quickly dawned on me I don't drink anymore. Doh! Where did that come from? :huh: Just a reminder we need to keep on our toes!!

Have a great day everyone!!!

[YoungAtHeart]

tuesday morning

Yay--like nice to see some others on here besides bear and me! ;-)

Accountable, I had to laugh at your wanting to celebrate with wine! I've had thoughts like that pop into my head too at times. It is easier to resist the "celebration" thoughts than the "self-pity" ones for me. Good for you on finding good childcare and bummer that you have to go to work, but you are handling it like the strong woman that you are.

Victoria, I have every confidence in you. I will send you hugs and good vibes this weekend, as well. Good luck with your half-marathon, too.

Lou-Lou, you are no longer the "fat kid". I have the intuitive feeling that a lot of the "fat" you see on your body is in your head, love, although Iknow it is hard for those scars to heal. I think it will be good to talk to your GP about your meds, though, and see if there is anything to help with waking up at night, starving! Yikes!

Hi and welcome, AngieUK! Look forward to hearing more from you!

Good to see you too, Di--oh those families!!! Gotta love em!

I hope your mood lifts soon, Rivergirl--I'm sending a some good vibes your way.

And hi, Popeye! Glad all is peaceful in your part of the world.

Anyhow, good night! I got 2/3 of my income from last year calculated today. Tomorrow the rest of that, then on to the deductions...... Such fun!

XOXOX,
Kathy

[YoungAtHeart]

tuesday morning

Another one bites the dust!

I thought I lost my post, but I didn't! Whew! There were bad words in here before I edited it! LOL! ;-)