Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

[scottish lass]

Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

Evening all.
Byrd, sadly not hanging strong. Friday was really bad bad day for me and I self medicated with wine, but stopped the madness Friday evening. A pottery class would be wonderful, I am so on for that!
Daisy, thank you for your PM - it was a life saver and straightened me out so I jumped back on on Saturday instead of blowing the whole weekend, I thank you!
I hope you family time went well, I feel for your brother - being in Californeia and Dad in England, it is a long way away when our parents are sick. My Dad has just recieved the all clear from cancer, but sadly all the treatments took a huge toll - he is an old man now, he also had a heart attack and needed bypass surgery, so he is not the man that I remember. I feel bad for my mother who is a very young 72 year old and now spends her time ensuring dad is ok - and I am no help at all 6,000 miles away.
So back again and determined to get past 6 days now - got to do it this time....
Good luck with the hospital trips and then your class Daisy!
Byrd, Daisy and anyone else, thanks for the hand holds, I did need them, so sorry that I let you down on Friday, but thanks for being there and I will hold on tighter now. Wildflowers - it is great that Daisy reached out to me - she really did get me thru the weekend, and I am so very grateful....:l:l:l

[scottish lass]

Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

Byrd - trucking around the threads, and saw that I missed your 20month celebration - so very well done! Thanks for showing us that it can be done, and with such grace, encouragement and honesty - it is much appreciated!

[daisy45]

Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

Morning all; it is still a little bit strange for me to be up so early and not feel tired. I am now making it to bed before 1am which is major for me. It really does make all the difference to how my day goes....much clearer head, getting more done and not feeling so anxious. I know alcohol played the biggest part but we must also look at other aspects of our lives that need tweaked...
Kradle, I did go out with a pair of manual shears but gave up as there was so much to do so I got out my saw and cut down 4 massive bushes! They will grow again but the space I have left in my garden is great. Have been reading about what happened to your son; I really feel for you and hope he comes away from this unaffected. I had a situation with my daughter and ended up home-schooling her. It was necessary for me but there are consequences....isolation from peers, lack of confidence in social settings, and a closeness with myself that has resulted in separation anxiety if she is not with me. I really hope you get someone in that school to realise the consequences of that single accusation and toss it...that teacher could have checked out the situation and sorted it quietly without causing this hullaballoo....I pray you get this sorted Kradle...stay strong.
Hey to Byrdie and Scotlass and Wildflowers; always there with a helping hand...
Scotlass, sorry to hear you have gone through this with your dad; I lived away from home for 12 years, although not as far away as you...it is hard for you when you feel so helpless; I'm sure your family know you care and that will be an added strength for them...
Well, went to my class and it is already getting pretty intense - homework! I can see that a lot of the work involves research and learning at home in order to be able to keep up with it all....
I know that drinking would not have a place here; the way my life is panning out now is intense between doing things to better myself and family commitments.
It is nice to see the AF days adding up now - I know for anyone on day 1 it is hard to look forward to even 1 week AF, but those days come together and you will be surprised at how time passes when you get yourself busy....keep believing....

[daisy45]

Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

heading to bed now after doing my 4hr class and another 2 hours homework. It is only the third week and it is getting intense....spent tonight googling, looking up books and looking for answers from my daughter. But, I have to say, feels good to be aiming for something....apart from sobriety...

Will check in tomorrow night; off for a swim at 8am and heading to Dublin airport at 10 to leave my brother off.....
Haven't had time to check in here today so hope everyone is staying strong....

Oops, almost forgot, 3 weeks AF today - Yes, yes, yes!!!!!!

[scottish lass]

Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

Ya Daisy - happy 3 weeks! Good for you.
Sorry you are saying goodbye to your brother tomorrow, goodbyes are hard. I am so not jealous of your homework, but good for you for enjoying the challenge.
Still have not managed to go swimming (for exercise) - not doing much of anything right now, have to get sorted out sometime - I know it will help with everything...
Sweet Dreams Daisy....:l

[Byrdlady]

Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

Miss Daisy...3 weeks....Well done!! I'm so proud of that...one more week and you get a hat!!!
I am continuously AMAZED at the change of tone in posts of drinkers vs. non drinkers. It literally pops off the page. When you (or anyone here) has fallen, it's a heavy veil that covers their soul. It is like a physical burden we are carrying....it is frightening to see what AL takes away from us...it really is. On the other hand, when someone has success, you can't contain that either! You see plans for the future! Here's what I notice... ACTIVITY. AL takes us to the couch....AF gets us up and moving! Driving! Planning things!! It really is amazing to read your posts...they are so positive. Next time the BEAST comes calling on you, I WILL BE PERCHED on your shoulder pointing my finger!! Don't you DARE let that BEAST back in this house!! I don't have to tell you these things, you already know them...but I pray for your continued success...because you deserve it!! And look how brite your face looks and that smile!!! You can't find that in a bottle (unless it's hair color!!!) Keep up the GREAT work, Ladybug! You can do this!! B

[daisy45]

Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

Hey Scot and Byrdie; just back from Dublin - took me 4 and a half hours....
My brother can't wait to get back to his wife and kids; he's talking about his own shower, own bed....no place like home....
Byrdie, I feel just how you describe - there is no comparison to how life is viewed sober versus drunk. I spoke to my brother the other day and he mentioned that anyone he knows who is sober are 'bores'. I could have said something in defence of the sobriety crew but I decided against it; I know I felt the same way as he did a couple of years ago - sobriety and all there is to gain from it can not be truly appreciated until you want it and experience it. 'Watch and wonder' is what I hope for him and others who may get fed up with the trudge of alcohol and then, like ourselves, they may look for a different way.
Have to say, it is a glorious day here. Came home to 2 cheques in the post. One for work I done in July. Nice wee surprise.
Byrdie, I think the beast will be more afraid of you than I am - hope so anyway!!!!!

[scottish lass]

Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

No place like home, thats for sure!
4 1/2 hrs is nothing over here, but is huge over the pond - busy day for you Daisy...sounds as if it was a little bit of a reality for you as well, which I am sure is not the easiest...
take care - be safe and be happy...

[Byrdlady]

Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

Daisy, I hear what you say about other drinkers and thinking we are boring. I used to think that too. But I don't think I'm boring, do you??? Eheheh....I was a little more to myself in the beginning, but once I got thru the social situations and didn't die, I got my confidence back. To each his own path.
SL, good to see you, I hope you had a great Thursday!
Tomorrow is going to be a great day...I can just feel it. Hugs to all! Stay strong! B

[Wildflowers]

Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

I just wanted you to know how happy I am for you in finding the truth out about sobriety! The rewards far out weigh anything that drinking brings!...

I bet your pretty cool, funny, creative, sober. I know your just a luv & smart as a ginger snap to!...

I will continue to keep you & your loved ones in my prayers!!!...

It appears part of my families harvest & peace has been short lived. My Mom fell outside the other night. She has had trouble walking, short of breath, congestive heart, diabetic, major weight issues, her eye sight is poor. Was in the hospital late spring, blood transfusions. They have taken MRI, CT, X-rays, & oodles of blood. I pray for a diagnosis & cure. She is of sound mind & is positive, but afraid. I think she will have to go to re-hab, or assisted living. Then my brother, oh my, $$$. Well, it's all going to work out somehow Daisygirl. Time to enact my faith ~ trust. Not forget to take care of me. I've only cried once today.

Must run. Take good ~ good care!!!... You & many others here are in my thoughts & prayers!!!...

God Bless

Love, :h

Wildflowers :l

[daisy45]

Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

Hey Byrdie; good to see you back in top form!!!!!
I went to my calligraphy class today and again really enjoyed it. We used proper calligraphy pens and ink today; it is so interesting how many styles and how beautiful it looks.
Byrdie, I really think you should look up a class and go - I know you would love it. It is creative and thoughtful and there are so many added things like making your own cards, little personalised books and framed quotations.....
The others in the class are mainly pensioners - full of wisdom! I love being the youngest (at 47!!!!) and listening to their stories. Most of them have been doing this for years and the work they do is exceptional, especially an old man in his 80s.
I am looking after my cousins little toddler tomorrow for the weekend; and my ex-husband is 50 this weekend. His wife text me to ask me to the party on Saturday night. It will be in the house him and I lived in - gonna be a weird one!!! All of his family will be there; I will actually feel more comfortable with his new wife - her and I get on pretty well. I have to go as I know my daughter won't go without me. Going to take the babby with us. She will create a distraction and hopefully an excuse to leave early......the things you have to do....it will be grand!
So on I go, merrily hopping through the buttercup meadows of sobriety - isn't life great when you open your eyes?!!!

[daisy45]

Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

Wildflowers;1383918 wrote: I just wanted you to know how happy I am for you in finding the truth out about sobriety! The rewards far out weigh anything that drinking brings!...

I bet your pretty cool, funny, creative, sober. I know your just a luv & smart as a ginger snap to!...

I will continue to keep you & your loved ones in my prayers!!!...

It appears part of my families harvest & peace has been short lived. My Mom fell outside the other night. She has had trouble walking, short of breath, congestive heart, diabetic, major weight issues, her eye sight is poor. Was in the hospital late spring, blood transfusions. They have taken MRI, CT, X-rays, & oodles of blood. I pray for a diagnosis & cure. She is of sound mind & is positive, but afraid. I think she will have to go to re-hab, or assisted living. Then my brother, oh my, $$$. Well, it's all going to work out somehow Daisygirl. Time to enact my faith ~ trust. Not forget to take care of me. I've only cried once today.

Must run. Take good ~ good care!!!... You & many others here are in my thoughts & prayers!!!...

God Bless

Love, :h

Wildflowers :l

Cross-post there Wildflowers; you hang in there. I will be with you in your prayers for your mum and brother. And, cry away; it helps to get a little release.....
Couldn't help but smile at your comment about 'ginger snap'; I have blonde hair and 2 days ago took a notion of going brunette. It didn't quite work out so now I am well and truly ginger/auburn!
Nighty night and sleep tight. x

[daisy45]

Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

Well, I have just my finished a 500 word essay for my first assignment; can't tell you how good it feels; needs a bit of tweaking but it was in the back of my mind all week - I like to get things done and dusted and not worry about sqeezing it in at the last minute....
Actually, after reading this back, I realise that this is the 'sober me' talking; when I drink, everything is last minute or undone; I wouldn't even be doing a course - feeling like this is soooo much better.............
We have a beautiful, sunny, cold day here - isn't life great?!!!!

[daisy45]

Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

Hi all; day 27 here; have to say not major cravings but definitely thoughts creeping in here and there. I have found reading posts from others who are feelling similar to myself very helpful - 'you took the words right out of my mouth' kind of thing.
This time around has been the busiest I have ever been during a quit which really is a bonus. I am concentrating more on what I have to do and not so much thinking on 'not drinking'.
Going to get my ass on to my exercise bike now for a while - I like to read a book while I cycle; usually get more done as don't notice the time pass away.
Oh, and I am now a brunette. Went from pure blonde to 4 days ginger and finally went for brunette! Now to find out which one has more fun????!!!!!!

[scottish lass]

Reaching for the stars - after a good kick up the ****!!!

Congrats Daisy - and beat those voices/cravings!
It is lovely to hear others facing the same thats for sure!
I was just driving to work and thinking about going shorter - can't imagine changing colour that much, am a blond - was a blond, maybe more light brown and grey and blond with help but to change to ginger and brown not sure about that! I do play with the length and am feeling a need to reinvent myself to help with all my journeys!
Happy biking and reading!