Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

[Rusty]

Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

Hi Papmom:l

Sorry-x-post, and I feel soooo badly that you didn't get the job you wanted. I'm glad you're on Wellbutrin and I hope it helps you. I'm proud of you for making those tough choices in tightening your budget. All of those things....agility, your Jeep....must have been so hard to give up. Great news on the phy. exam and too bad your new doc is incompetent. Yes, absolutely, give faith a try. It really does work, and if you have time check out the What We Believe In thread. It's excellent, and I lurk there often. I'll pray for you, today, dear friend. Am I working too hard again, you asked? No, not really, but I have had the most profitable August in my 6 years of having my business. I am also taking more classes in November to be certified as a trainer and consultant in the medical devices and occupational health and safety fields. Thanks for always asking about me, Papmom, and I pray your luck will turn around soon. I've been in your shoes and it's heartbreaking. Love, Rusty

[rustop59]

Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

Hi everyone

Thanks for thinking of me Rusty. Alls well, just came back from our cruise yesterday and got rid of the last lot of visitors today. My daughter goes back to school tomorrow. Have lots n lots of catching up to do. :lPapmom, hang in there. Well done Rusty on doing so well in your business. Everyone else big hello, look forward to joining you all again during the week.

Rustop

[Lavande]

Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

Welcome back rustop! Can't wait to hear about your trip

Rusty, don't worry about me ~ I work quite well under pressure (think of nearly 30 years worth of cardiac calls) :H
Glad you are expanding on your skills for work.

papmom, I am sorry about everything :l
But living within our means really is something we all have to do or face the consequences. Just don't give up - keep looking around for a better job situation - there's one out there waiting for you. Glad you & the kids are healthy

Roasting a (what else) chicken for dinner but Stella & her clan are safe :H

[dill]

Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

Hello Awesomes, I was just re-reading some of last week's posts and some of this week's posts. I really feel like I am so close to grasping the golden ring, flipping the switch, turning the page or however it may be expressed. I never truly understood before the joy that freedom from alcohol could bring. I always felt somehow gypped that I had to give it up; the once pleasant ending-of-the-day drink had gone so far out of control and I couldn't put that genie back in the bottle. But I am finally working past that. I am less resentful and more grateful that there is freedom and it can be mine. Something LBH said last week about drinking at this point was somehow a pathetic act hit very close to home. There is not simple pleasure in it anymore and it no longer serves me to keep trying to make it so. Yes, "brick-headed", that sums me up!

Rusty, no, Mr. D and I did no boating this summer. I started out the summer with my back injury and boating was pretty much out of the question. Thanks for asking though! I sure feel for you having to deal with negativity. It's quite draining. You need to put up your invisible force field to keep the negativity at bay!

Papmom :l, thanks for the encouragement. I am glad you are trying the Welbutrin and hope it helps.

Rustop, glad you are back!

IMT, I love Hangover Free Sundays too! I love waking in the wee hours of the morning and realizing that I am AF and that I will have a good morning when it's time to get up and moving.

Hi Lav and LBH, Chill, Star, SD, nellie, TDN, kas, et. al,

[ThreeDogNight]

Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

Good evening, everyone.
Don't always post, but read the posts every day. It is encouraging and interesting here.
Pap3, was just going to send you a PM today, as I haven't seen you around for a bit. I am so sorry about that flippin' job! They must be a bunch of idiots at that school!! I know it's hard to think now, but something will come for you. I do have faith, and I will ask for something good to come your way. Don't give up! Glad you started the AD. I took Wellbutrin a couple of years ago, but I was still drinking, so it didn't work. Paxil did work for me, but the Amoryn seems to be what I need. In any case, I sure hope this brings the relief you need. But you stay AF, and I admire you so for that. Sorry you had to cancel the trial in Maine, and sorry about the Jeep. God, you have so much on your plate. Maybe you can come up and visit us.
Just got back from work and am going to have dinner, then get into bed and read and watch some TV. Had quite a long work week.
Hope everyone has a great evening and a great AF week!
TDN

[papmom3]

Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

Thanks TDN! Very nice words. Just sent you a PM.

Thanks everyone for sympathsizing with me today and for the good thoughts. I've been thinking that something has to change for 2 years now and so far nothing. But I am going to hold on to the faith that there is a plan for me somewhere.

What i forgot to post today was that my yard has become a wildlife sanctuary all of a sudden! I was pretty sure I had 2 fish left in the pond but this week I saw 3! There are 2 frogs and a TON of Painted Lady butterflys on my butterfly bush and tall coreopsis. Also a couple of Monarchs here and there. I saw what I think was a flycatcher of some sort flitting through the trees, a hawk calling overhead today and hearing a bunch of bird calls that I haven't heard all summer. Migration might be starting early. Lots of crickets as well tonite. Not bad for a city back yard!!

[Lavande]

Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

papmom - do you have a camera?
My DIL comes over here & takes pictures of all my backyard naturey stuff, prints them up & sells them on Etsy as greetings cards, magnets, all sorts of stuff
Just a thought for you
There always is something nice going on if we just remember to keep our eyes & ears open - amen.

[Lavande]

Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

Good Monday morning all,

Heading out in the pouring rain to watch my grandsons for a couple of hours then a trip to the PO to mail out all my weekend work then finally to Curves....busy is good

Wishing everyone a great AF Monday!
Lav

[Guitarista]

Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

papmom3;1369169 wrote:

But I am going to hold on to the faith that there is a plan for me somewhere.

What i forgot to post today was that my yard has become a wildlife sanctuary all of a sudden! I was pretty sure I had 2 fish left in the pond but this week I saw 3! There are 2 frogs and a TON of Painted Lady butterflys on my butterfly bush and tall coreopsis. Also a couple of Monarchs here and there. I saw what I think was a flycatcher of some sort flitting through the trees, a hawk calling overhead today and hearing a bunch of bird calls that I haven't heard all summer. Migration might be starting early. Lots of crickets as well tonite. Not bad for a city back yard!!

Hiya Pappy! Good to see you.

That's some kind of sign right there, with all that nature action going on in your backyard. Life blossoming......

Hi Lav,

Have a happy healthy week everyone!

[dill]

Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

Greetings Lav, G, Pmom, TDN and All,
I love my early morning walks with the dog, but dawn keeps moving later and later. My walk time is being compressed by having to get to work. My posting time is too. But I'm checking in to say I'm happy to be here, hangover-free and ready to win another day!
Loved to hear about your nature preserve, Pmom. When you need serenity, you have it close at hand.

[ladybirdheart]

Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

I think you are clearly on a good path Dill, for some of us a steady slower pace works for all sorts of things. I think if I had not gone back to drinking more than once after being AF I never would have been able to see it for what it simply is, drinking would have retained some seductive mystique, instead of what turned out to be rather sad. If I am ever sorry I am AF, all I have to do to appreciate it is to drink. Pap, as with G I think it?s a treat how you discovered all of what you have, literally in your own backyard. Unless we are a little bit happy we can?t see what is there and I am glad you did. I think the way I got to be really good with money early on was tune in to whatever was wonderful in the world at arms length. I discovered I could go without all sorts of things that other people had, that I thought I needed, that people told me I needed, that other people paid other people to do, and just perk along in my world until I had enough cash saved to get something or go somewhere without paying interest. I have always had a lot of fear about living outside my means, trusting that things would somehow be OK, so I have just never developed a taste for it. People still laugh at me but I think in a good way. I have a lot of conveniences and ?stuff? now but if I were to lose them I would hope that my inner life would not be very different. Off to bathe and trim my little doggies who have been ?helping? me all week in the garden. They are much more pleasing to pet when they are not sticky with pine sap. Hi all, welcome home Rustop! Love, Ladybird.

[papmom3]

Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

Hey LBH-what you wrote sounds so good and true. I'm not sure how as the oldest, I somehow developed a sense of entitlement once I was out on my own. Certainly my parents did nothing to encourage that-quite the opposite. We as kids never wanted for anything but were told no many times. Vacations were camping trips or a week or month at my grandparents, not trips to Disney. My jeans were not the latest style and my mom made many of my clothes which I thought was very cool (I'm sure my sister, she of the Filenes and Talbots worshipers, was horrified). I have never had a problem with second hand or used things-I love a good bargain. But, the first time I got a credit card, I maxxed it out in no time buying christmas gifts for my family. First year on my own. From then on it was a vicious cycle of I need this or i want that so I will buy it. When I first bought my house I was definitely house poor and used the CCs to buy the fundamentals. I've used the equity in my house up completely funding home improvement projects, buying a car because mine died, financing vet surgeries etc. My toys are phones and laptops, one every couple of years. I have no other toys except agility related. my cars have always been used. Did I really need a V8 Grand Cherokee? Hindsight says no. I could have gone with an v6 Escape but I was bound and determined to get the highest tow capacity. Have I towed the Paphut yet? Nope. And it looks like I never will. I envy people like you and my brother and my dad. I don't know what sick addiction it is that makes me live above my means but all for just daily life stuff. And yet I was happy to get a 98 cent can of pasta sauce today at Walmart-good for 2 or 3 meals and I paid for it with cash. Such a contrast I am. Frugal one minute when my back is against the wall (love the thrill of Freecycle!), spending like a maniac the next. Oh, and I can always rationalize. Well, I just rationalized my way to giving up my car, my paphut, my beloved agility and probably top notch care for the kids because I have no cushion.
Will I ever really learn?
I do love nature, always have. The first thing I did tonite when I got home was go see the fishies and frogs. Still there. butterflys no where to be seen but it was late. I needed to see my little buddies in the pond in order to get over the fact that I won't be able to take thursday or friday off. My boss is in a huge jam-people are jumping ship left and right-and he needs me in the office. Will he ever tell me thanks? Nope. Will I get rewarded for having his back and rearranging my schedule and disappointing my dad by canceling our sail on Friday? Nope. but I continue to to acquience to him. Why? Because he's the boss? He didn't actually come out and say no, just gave me the look. I guess I keep hoping he'll actually get it some day. sigh.

[Lavande]

Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

Good evening G, Dill, LBH & Papmom,
Hope everyone had a good day, I did. Got some more work too - awesome.

Speaking of 'stuff collections' I'm not a big fan but YB sure was. He's wasted a lot of money on stuff he used once maybe twice then forgot all about it like a dehydrator - wtf?
Most of his stuff is out in the special garage he built for himself across the driveway from the other garage........what a waste!

Papmom, glad your fishies are happy & hanging out with you
Sorry your boss has you by the short hairs (so to speak). Maybe you can sneak out early on Friday?

I am expecting a visit from my daughter & Ms Lily tomorrow - just a fly by for lunch really but I'm happy!
Wishing everyone a good night.

[ladybirdheart]

Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

Good that you have more orders, Lav, and a nice visit to look forward to. I am so glad you are around, Pap, I understood completely when you said earlier that you had to hibernate for a while. We sure can get ourselves into a pickle in one way or another. Since I have been here, every few weeks or months I experience something that I can either go through or talk about, I don?t seem to be able to do both at least at the same time. I suck at multitasking in all of its vicissitudes. I am glad we are both here now. Off to look at something restful for a while. I thought of you today when I inadvertently upended a little toddler turtle while tidying a plant. I first saw him last year (and only once for a few minutes) as a newborn, and I?ll make an attempt to post a picture of that debut tomorrow. If he surfaces again I shall take a new one as he is twice the size. Today I discovered, as did he, that he loves cantaloupe. He was born here in my inner city backyard, lived alone through ?9F last winter. Nature has sustained me over and again, it's like an explosion, an infinite variety of living, it won?t be denied. Night, night. Love, Ladybird.

[Chillgirl]

Awesome August Abstainers ~ week 4

Good morning guys

It's wonderful to have our Mr G around clocking up these AF days and to see TDN, IMT and Nellie. This thread attracts great energy and is always a joy to read.

Papmom - :l you always inspire me so much with the way you keep getting over life's knocks. You dust yourself off and get back up when so many others would cry in the dirt. God rewards the brave and you have the most amazing courage, never stop having faith that it will all work out for the greater good. Your life took you on the AF path and gave you the strength to keep going. You are a remarkable person Papmom and I never cease to be proud of you.

Rustop - :welcome: home!! Great to see you back.

Lav - YBs junk garage would drive me crazy! I'm I "thrower-outer" I keep only what's practical and what's used, I'm not a nic nacks person, I love minimal and lots of space.

Well I guess I should give a better explanation as to what's been happening in Chillworld. In a silly way I've been reluctant to put it in black and white in case I tempt fate to take it away from me. I'm the most unsuperstitious person anyway which makes it even sillier so here goes.....

As you all know I had been traveling around England since finishing my course looking at areas I would like to settle in. Well Suffolk was one on the list, it's in one of the driest parts of the UK, is mostly farmland with some nice sized towns and within easy reach of the beautiful city of Cambridge. Just 4 weeks ago I started looking at rentals down here and at the exact same time I received an email from a guy who happened to live here who'd seen my profile on a date site I'd registered on. Of course I asked him about certain areas and said I was coming down to look so we arranged to meet up. I came down and saw a house I liked which I would have taken but the usual issue of pets put it on hold. In the meantime Mr Suffolk and I met up and got along incredibly. Instead of staying for 2 days I stayed for 5.

After returning to Birmingham for just 2 days he made the 5 hour round trip to come and see me for just one night and then I went on holiday with my Parents. On the last day he drove up again and joined me, met my parents and came back to Birmingham with me to help me pack. We had agreed I would come back down to Suffolk and stay with him while I looked for a place to live. That plan has since changed again and we have decided that although we have known each other for such a short time we want to make a go of it together and Elle and I are therefore going to move permanently into his home. I know it's all happened so quickly and I'm aware of all the dangers of it all going wrong. However the truth of the matter is, I have absolutely nothing to lose. Not only have I fallen in love with Suffolk but with Mr Suffolk too and I can't remember being this happy for such a very long time. It may all end tomorrow but with all I have learned about living in the now, I'm truly taking one day at a time and enjoying every wonderful moment.

So today I have been living here for exactly one week and life is so good.......