Simply Sober October - Week 2

[papmom3]

Simply Sober October - Week 2

Morning all!! Well said Star!! You will have twice the fun and half the stress on your trip staying AF. Imagine waking up to those beautiful sunrises raring to go-no headache, no hangover, no regrets. Ahhhhh......

I don't know why I've been so selfish lately with the newbies. I guess I just got tired of offering my experiences and suggestions and warnings and having them totally ignored and then to see that person(s) slink back the next morning tail between legs lamenting and saying "oh I wish I had listened to you guys" or even worse "I don't regret what I did, but I'm back on the wagon with renewed commitment." Right. I just got very hardened and cynical especially with the repeat offenders. I can tell the difference between someone who is really struggling with the addiction and someone who just hasn't totally made the commitment to at least try. sometimes you have to make the hard decisions and sacrifice to get some time under your belt. Oh my, what I soapbox I find myself on today!! Off I go!! :soapbox:
Have a great day everyone! See you tonite!!

[dill]

Simply Sober October - Week 2

Hello Sober Ones,
Star, interesting thoughts and observations about early abstinence and later abstinence and abstinence in general. I haven't had the experience recently of someone encouraging me to take an al beverage, but I remember that being common in the past. I myself encouraged others. It seemed harmless to me then as I saw alcohol as fun and as a social lubricant. I didn't see it then as I do now. I certainly meant no harm in my encouraging others to imbibe, I was just ignorant of the true nature of alcohol. More recently, no one has encouraged me and I think it may be due to our level of maturity. At age 60 people assume I know what I want to drink!:H
Pmom, Was the neonatal hat crochet or knit? What yarn did it require? Is the pattern difficult? I sew sometimes but prefer knitting and crocheting. I just finished a patchwork sampler for my grandson using bright colors outlined in black. It turned out so cute! I'll see if I can get a picture to post. I forgot to take one before I sent it off to him. Duh!
Lav, Have fun today on Gma duty. It's taxing but fun. I have to work today, unfortunately. But the next time I have the grandson over, we are going to make play doh together! He told me he likes play doh. I think I'll make it fall colors.
LBH, I love the theme of that poem by Frost. I thought of your comment a few weeks ago about the brilliance of the flowers in your garden as the fall was just beginning. It is like gold and cannot stay. It makes me appreciate them even more. There was a time when drinking that glass in the evening was like gold as well. A moment to savor and enjoy but does not last. At some point I went chasing that gold, like the pioneers of the gold rush. It turned out to be but Fool's Gold for me.
Rsutop, glad you have solved your internet problems and hope you will be able to get back to regular posting, between your chauffeuring duties!

It's 7:25 and I'm seeing pink light on thet horizon. May the sun rise upon another af day for us all. :h

[Chillgirl]

Simply Sober October - Week 2

Hi Guys - Happy humpback day

Sorry for being MIA but I have a lot going on in my head at the moment and for some reason Im not ready to verbalize it, which isnt like me :H

Anyway I just wanted to say that Im fine and will share more when it feels right. Im going to London this weekend to an NLP conference with Starty who Im so looking forward to seeing and the positive energy will be just what I need.

Papmom - I so sympathize with your financial woes as Im in a similar state and wish we lived closer as Im sure we could work out a pink girls house share and help each other with doggy care.

[Lavande]

Simply Sober October - Week 2

Hello friends,

I'll be back later tonight to explain my bizarre day, not great fun.
Greetings to everyone!
Lav

[ladybirdheart]

Simply Sober October - Week 2

Greetings! I trust you will sort through your thoughts and feelings, Chill, sometimes I too just have to let things percolate, talking about them seems premature or somehow alien. Dill, I think about you every day in my garden, things are changing but still glorious, I shall take good care of the garden over the winter with all of my grateful heart. Pap, I think more people than not burn out from time to time in their efforts to help others with self-defeating behaviors such as substance dependence, obesity, abusive relationships etc. We can say what works for us, but that is about it. A person can know exactly what the right thing to do is for a particular problem, but we each still have to find a way to actually pull it off when we are all alone and to deal with any failures along the way in a manner that allows us to even want to keep trying. Things get even more confusing online when the underlying emotion and intent of posts can be misconstrued. I think of how loyal you have been to your friend who is the "collector" and I don't think it is selfish to need a break and surround yourself with people who are high functioning. How I feel about myself and my own life seems more dependent up it than I would like, but when I was drinking and less conscious of what I was doing to myself I think I had more fantasies about rescuing people. My sympathies in advance, Lav, I hope you are OK. Welcome back to our world, Rustop. I am so with you on this path, Star. Love, Ladybird.

[Lavande]

Simply Sober October - Week 2

Well, just found a free moment....

My day started off with a txt message from YB at 6:30 am. He was having severe abdominal pain. At first I thought so what, why tell me? Then I woke up & realized he was in pain & scared so I did the right thing & took him to the ER. He's had a lot of testing done & is having a scan done now in nuclear medicine. It's looking like a gall bladder problem, we shall see. He's been admitted & will be staying overnight even though he's already putting up some resistance. He had an IV narcotic administered so he feels better now - duh.
I had to send my DIL scrambling to find someone else to watch the kids this morning, oh well. I can't be everywhere at once :H
Waiting to see if they want to treat him medically or haul him off to the OR, Oh boy, fun, fun.

I hope everyone is as happy being AF as I am today. This day would have been a real bear to handle with a hangover :H

Greetings Pap, dill, star, chill, LBH and anyone else popping in

[dill]

Simply Sober October - Week 2

Whew! What a day you've had, Lav. Try to relax and pamper yourself tonight. I'm sure you were torn between taking care of YB and taking care of your grandkids but you did the right thing.

Chill, I understand the need to go quiet every now and then. Do what you need to do.

LBH, the sunset tonight was absolutely golden.

[Lavande]

Simply Sober October - Week 2

Afraid I missed the sunset but at least I'm back home now

YB is scheduled for surgery early tomorrow afternoon & will be discharged later in the day - yikes.
Guess he's going to deal with having to stay here for a day or two. I'll be nice :H

Honestly, you just never know what's right around the corner, do you?

I hope everyone has a peaceful night!
lav

[papmom3]

Simply Sober October - Week 2

Wow Lav-what an unexpected turn your day took!! As much as I have wanted to give YB many many haircuts, I truly hope the surgery goes well and that his pain will be much reduced once that nasty gall bladder is out. My brother had emergency GB surgery 2 days before Thanksgiving in 2009. They said if they had waited even one hour more it would have burst and we could have lost him. It sounds as tho YB's GB is not as acute so good wishes are being sent out to him. Extra love and hugs will be sent to you who will be the caregiver for 2 days. I know you will be busy but remember we are all here for you.

Chill-oooohhhhh, a pink girls house!! Can you just see it? Ms Lav is invited too if she can stand all the pink! :H Oh Chill, I wish there were a way for you and Elle to move over here. The job situation is better, housing is better for prices I think and the thought of having 2 (or more) dear dear friends as roommates is a heavenly thought. Sigh.
I do hope all will be OK for you. You know we are here when you are ready. :l I think it fab that you will be with Starty for a few days. you guys always have such fun. Would you post pics on FB for me?

Dill-I too was guilty of pushing AL on people when hostessing or out with friends. Who knew back then? It was fun and it was a social lubricant and is still to some people-just not us. As you are, I am fortunate that no one questions me at all.
The hat/cap was crocheted with cotton varigated yarn-mostly white using a half double stitch. I don't have the pattern as my friend walked me through it step by step and when I tried to duplicate it last nite it came out half the size and kind of funny looking :H. Tonite I am working on a scarf, probably for me using really soft nubby blue yarn. Very difficult to work with as its very hard to see the holes to go through but I'm using double crochet stitch and its OK if it comes out kind of holey. I think that might be in now-shabby chic. I would LOVE to see a pic of the sampler if you can get them to send one to you!

LBH- I finally had to tell my friend last nite to stop talking about watching Hoarders and thinking she wasn't that bad, and to stop complaining about her son trying to get rid of some of the stuff in her yard and to stop talking about the cleaning she says she is doing. I just can't take it anymore. She will never ever change and I just need to accept that and define the boundaries. I don't feel so loyal now but I need to protect me. You are so so right about how everyone needs to find their own way out, no matter what the addiction is. We all did it our way and did it differently.

Rustop-welcome back to the land of pings and pongs!! We missed you! Happy belated 20th to your dear daughter.

today was a ho hum day with a twinge of jealousy and bitterness thrown in. The IT department who DIDN"T hire me but hired a colleague of mine instead, brought her to my office to "teach" her how our scanning system works. It was really tough to listen to the banter and all. I kept thinking, "hrmphh, they wouldn't have had to teach ME that-I already know it!".
I just hope I don't have to work too closely with her as I have no doubt I have more knowledge and skill than she does and it would suck to have to pretend she's the expert. Not.
OK, got that little rant out of my system, hopefully for good.
the good news is I think I have enough gas to get to work and home again tomorrow. I'll be able to buy a tankful on Friday when I get paid. Also, my freezer and fridge are almost empty!!
Have a great nite all!

[Chillgirl]

Simply Sober October - Week 2

Good morning gang

Lav - oh poor YB, that pain must have been excruciating! What on earth would that man do without you!? Do you think that ever crosses his mind?

I had a good chat yesterday with an employment agency and I'm hoping I may have an interview with a local Insurance broker soon. Commercial insurance was my career pre marriage and although i would be a bit rusty i know id pick it up again. There is another company looking to recruit in a town further away and they would be a great co to work for but like Papmoms dilemmas I have calculated that fuel would be ?300 a month to get there. That plus doggy care would not even leave me any money to pay rent so financially I'm really having to rely on getting work in my local town to make it viable.

I'm off to seize the day! Have a wonderful AF Thursday everyone.

[Stargazerlily]

Simply Sober October - Week 2

Good morning to all...

Pap, I understand about feeling discouraged with trying to help people find their way out. I read something recently that talked about allowing people to suffer, go through their journey, and not feeling responsible to solve their problems. I feel the same. If someone asks, or it comes up, support can be offered, otherwise, I have been thinking it is just part of their journey. I need to and am often touched by Just Starting Out and General Discussion threads, from time to time. I often just read. Your hoarder friend will stay a friend as you are setting good clear boundaries. The work incident sounds more than annoying...good to hear your gas and food will last till Friday!!!

Chill, good luck on the job search...the NLP conference sounds interesting, I would love to attend one. I will have to look in my area. I am also interested in Mind Based Stress Reduction, but the training is pricey. Hope everything is going well with Mr. Suffolk.

LBH, the weather is changing here, gardens are covered in leaves, frost on more and more mornings, it is lovely.

Lav, YB takes you for granted, of course you did the right thing. Hope for your sake (and his) that the surgery goes well so caretaking is at a minimum. What a day!!!

Rustop, hey, your daughter is 20, wow.

Work today and my new thing is Jimmy John's veggie sandwich. I got my husband hooked on them, too. To all,have a good day.

[dill]

Simply Sober October - Week 2

Good morning everyone,
Lav, I'll be sending strength your way for the next couple of days. I hope YB recovers quickly and things get back to "normal" ASAP.
Chill, I hope things go well with the insurance job, or something turns up soon. It's a tought economy but you're a talented and bright woman. I'm confident you'll find something!
Star, I've never heard of Jimmy John's so I googled. The nearest one to me is 25 miles away, so not likely I'll be going there real soon! If I ever see one when we're traveling, I'll give it a try. I too read sometimes in the just starting out section. I have not forgotten the misery I was in back then and how totally obsessed I was with alcohol... how the thought of going one day without drinking overwhelmed me!!! Breaking that obsession has been a long process for me.
Papmom, Here are the pics I got. They are small and don't display the piece well, but you will get an idea of it.



Each square is a different crochet stitch. It was fun because I learned so many new stitches.

I made a pumpkin pie from scratch yesterday. It was delicious! I think it was worth the extra effort of baking the pumpkin and scooping out the meat. It did seem to have more flavor.

Let's continue on our af ways. We all sound so much happier and productive. Attached files [img]/converted_files/1955195=7056-attachment.jpg[/img] [img]/converted_files/1955195=7057-attachment.jpg[/img]

[Lavande]

Simply Sober October - Week 2

Good morning one & all!
Just wanted to stop by & say HI before this day launches ~ likely to be very long!

Chill, I hope that job works out for you, sounds good

Star, there's a place called Jimmy Johns not far from here but all they serve is hot dogs, eeewww.
I'll take the veggie sandwich any day!

Dill, I love the coziness of hand made comforters & still have some my Mom made
I am so relieved that we have broken through & kicked aside the compulsion to drink. We truly can live happily & peacefully without AL.

OK, off I go!
Wishing everyone a terrific AF Thursday.
Lav

[rustop59]

Simply Sober October - Week 2

Hi everyone

Lav - it seems all your family including YB depend on you. Hope he gets well soon, men are not the best of patients. Make sure to give yourself some me time.

Dill Love the quilt. I have not done anything creative in years and I used to enjoy it.

Chill and Papmom - wishing you both success in achieving the job you both deserve.

Star, Rusty and LBH you all sound to be in a good place. I don't have time to go into newbies much but if any of them are reading, I hope they take comfort in the fact that a lot of us here struggled in the beginning. I did not become totally AF overnight and that disillusioned me at times but I kept trying.

Did I mention that I am doing a course called Absolutely Fabulous? Two style coaches are giving it and it covers dressing for body shape, make up, colors, accessories and a shopping trip at the end. As most of you know I struggled to loose weight last year and finally did. At 50 I think I need to revamp, I have been wearing the same make up for years. Enjoying it so far.

Rustop

[ladybirdheart]

Simply Sober October - Week 2

Dill the crocheted blanket is wonderful! I love samplers with all the interesting squares. And Rustop, I am in envy, I am quite sure I could use a major makeover. I wear no makeup and my hair is in long pale braids tied around my head, total strangers call me "Heidi". I think I do a little better with clothes. Thinking of you, Lav, as you take care of your mysterious and maddening husband, I have always rather liked him but I am sure he is much less infuriating when viewed from across the country. Star, thanks for the Jimmy Johns veggie sandwich tip, I found out there is one by the University a couple miles from here. Enjoy carving out a job, Chill, I learned early on that I love having money made by my own self, it is different money somehow. Cyn, are you still in Germany with the maestro? I am trying to keep a good attitude in spite of having yet another f-ing spasm/pinched nerve/whatever, the third in the past few months, this one in my back/hip. I do not want to take medication so I am using ice and heat, I hate being hemmed in, hobbling around. I limped through Trader Joe's, and in their enormous liquor department I am sure was a bottle of numb with my name on it but not today, I am home slamming water as I think dehydration is playing a part in these things. I am now down to 115 pounds so I should be moving like a gazelle instead of Jabba the Hut. At least I can already feel things turning around for the better. It seems to take about three days to get loosened up. Speaking of all loosened up, dear Rusty, hope you are mellow. Happy almost Friday, Pappy. Love, Ladybird.