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    Need all the assistance i can get

    Drinking used to be fun....but now fun has become drinking and I drink almost everyday.At times two bottles of wine a night ,half a bottle of whisky,12 pack of savanna (cider).However i am very functional as well,am at work on time ,never missed work because of it,but i know i drink too much and i lie about it sumtimes because of the shame.

    Today i want to embark on a recovery journey am hoping i can be a moderate drinker ,but am afraid i dont know how to do it by myself.Ihope someone here can hold my hand and help me through this journey.I have failed.:new:

    #2
    Need all the assistance i can get

    Summertym, glad your having a hard look at this and taking it seriously. I can't help on modding since it just doesn't work for me, but if you're wanting to do a stretch of abstaining and see how you feel, you're in the right place for sure!
    nosce te ipsum
    (Know Thyself)

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      #3
      Need all the assistance i can get

      Hiya Summertym..well youve taken the first step..well done you. Dont know much about taking al in moderation except that I failed miserably on numerous occasions, so now I am af which works for me..whatever you choose or decide, you wont find a better place to get help, so cmon in
      af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 12

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        #4
        Need all the assistance i can get

        Hi Summertyme and :welcome: I noticed you post and just wanted to say that I can really relate to every single word. Drinking stopped being fun for me too, and started taking over my daily life even though I was still very functional on the outide. I was in a high level management position at a Fortune 50 company and never missed a day of work and was always an "over achiever" in that regard. But alcohol slowly snuck up and took over my mind, even while I was still following my "rules" such as not drinking in the workplace, not drinking before 5PM (and later 3PM), etc.

        I found myself arriving at work and just feeling this need to establish a "drinking plan" for after work. Once I had happy hour lined up, I could get on with the work of the day. Stuff like that. Sometimes I would be just counting down the hours until drinking time. I started to love weekends where I felt drinking early in the day was my "reward" for working hard and being successful.

        I though alcoholics lived under bridges in boxes. I was successful! So I couldn't possibly be an alcoholic. I was shocked to find out (after coming here in 2007) that people with alcohol problems come in all shapes and sizes, from all kinds of professions and backgrounds - alcohol knows no boundaries.

        My Way Out is a nice place to explore whether you will be able to moderate your drinking, or not. Many of us find we cannot go back to that place where drinking is "fun again" and doesn't cause risks or problems when we do it. I am one of those people. It is far easier for me to have zero drinks than to try to have one. Only you can figure out what your reality is in that regard.

        Good luck to you. You are not alone.

        DG
        Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
        Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07


        One day at a time.

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          #5
          Need all the assistance i can get

          ST: I too was a functional alcoholic. I tried to drink mod but was never able to. Once I had one, all bets were off. Good luck. Don't think about tomorrow. Just stay sober today. Mary
          Wisdom, Courage, Strength
          October 3, 2012

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            #6
            Need all the assistance i can get

            Hi Summertym..how are you?what are you up to?
            af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 12

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              #7
              Need all the assistance i can get

              I can so relate to this post...I am right in the same spot, starting day one (again) today. Drinking has no longer been fun for a long time. Time to stop the madness. I'm tired of waking up feeling like crap, not remembering what I did the night before. Best of luck on your journey. I know from being sober for stretches of time over the last few years that it does get better. We must believe that in the early stages.
              Whatever you invest in the circle of LIFE is what comes back to you. Multiplied. What you give to people is what they eventually give back to you. Don't do the math. Just increase your LOVE.

              BE HAPPY...BE CONNECTED...BE HEALTHY!
              :h

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                #8
                Need all the assistance i can get

                I agree with everyone. I have tried and failed miserably at many attempts to "moderate" my drinking. I promise to only drink on weekends, only drink after a certain time, know when to cut myself off, etc...Then after just one weekend I find myself making excuses to drink on Monday, then Tuesday and so on and so forth. I am an alcoholic and moderating just never worked in my favor. Today is what feels like my 110th day 1 but I feel this is the time that it'll be different. Like you, drinking is no longer fun. It's become more of a chore than anything. Having to go to the store, take my shots, feel like crap the next day. So does not seem worth it anymore. I agree with Doggygirl as in I believed that alcoholics lived under bridges, had no teeth, were dirty and disheveled...I am an upstanding citizen, try to volunteer when I can, have a beautiful 4 year old, a gorgeous house and a great life. How could I possibly be an alcoholic? Well, I am and I too have learned that anyone, no matter status, can be one. I hope that you can learn how to moderate but if you can't just be willing to accept that and completely abstain. I wish you lots of luck and keep in mind that everyone on here is here for you!
                One day at a time, no matter how many times I fail, I will get this monkey off of my back!!! :confusedmonkey:

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                  #9
                  Need all the assistance i can get

                  I haven't been here in a while, in fact I am always surprised when my password still works. But this is a good place to be. I have finally made it to just over 2 months AF after many tries and mornings feeling like I failed once again. This last time I was even rejected by a re-hab because I wouldn't check in for 30 days, they refused to treat me out patient. But I am here and taking it one day at a time. That is all you can do. Don't think long term right now, just work on being sober today. You get a lot of good advise here.
                  AF again since 3/13/2014

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                    #10
                    Need all the assistance i can get

                    Hi Summertym,

                    Welcome. You've come to a good place to start tackling this - congrats on taking that first step. We all know how hard it is. I too can relate to your post.

                    You'll find a fair bit of debate here re moderation versus abstinence if you search around. Many here find they can't moderate. Some in the moderation section have found ways that work for them. In either case most would say try at least 30 days completely alcohol free before you make a call.

                    Personally not only can I not moderate but my ability to has only grown worse over time, not better, which is typical for alcoholics. But only you can figure that one out at the end of the day.

                    In the meantime, can you chuck out the booze and set your sights on a 30-day detox for starters?

                    :l Lilly

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                      #11
                      Need all the assistance i can get

                      Also, do you mean you drink this much altogether nightly or thereabouts: "At times two bottles of wine a night ,half a bottle of whisky,12 pack of savanna (cider)."

                      If so, and note I'm no medical expert, you may need to taper and/or do a medical detox. Can you talk honestly to your GP?

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