af day Wed 31 Oct

[CanToo]

af day Wed 31 Oct

Hmmm, I tried to find you a Kiwi joke, but I can't post that SH$T here!
:xmouth:

I'll do some thinking.....

[kuya]

af day Wed 31 Oct

CanToo;1403312 wrote: Hmmm, I tried to find you a Kiwi joke, but I can't post that SH$T here!
:xmouth:

I'll do some thinking.....

I googled Kiwi jokes.....tis a remarkably unfunny country and strangely whilst Kiwis are nice people their humour is limited. They don't get POM sarcasm really.

This is one though;

Why are New Zealand thoroughbreds the fastest in the world? Cos they have seen what Kiwis do to their sheep!

[Turnagain]

af day Wed 31 Oct

MICK!!!! 120 days!!!! wow...I didn't see that earlier!

How wonderful.....You are inspirational!!

[TheSunFlower]

af day Wed 31 Oct

Mick...a whole 120 days! Love it!

I have not read the thread as I don't have much time tonight.

Det...I just wanted to respond to you. You have always been there for me. Yep, I might have drank in that situation. Sounds like the worst you did was drink.....and did not make an ass of yourself. Congrats on that! Your hangover will be healed soon and you can move on and do what you need to do. Once I gave up on beating myself up about drinking when I did not plan to.....I was able to pick myself up faster. We are human. The mental is the worst....and when I beat myself up.....I was sure to drink again to erase that crappy emotional feeling.

I know that many have advised you to "tell' people at work. I don't recommend that. 90% of the population has no idea what we go through. Opening up to people who just don't get it....is not advised....even in AA.

Take it for what is. The emotional hangover lasts longer than any physical one.

That said.....I just had a friend who killed herself yesterday drinking. This was a person who had years of sobriety. I have been on the phone with her boyfriend all day. I am sad to say that this did not shock me. She has has been in numerous rehabs over the last year....to drink 48 hours after she got out. Of course she lied to me...lied and lied to me.

But, I will say that the number 1 reason why this happened was because....she beat herself up mentally. So sad as she was to start a new job, but got delayed due to the hurricane. So she drank herself to death. She was planning on starting school....excited about the new job.....now I get to go to funeral.

So a funeral it is.....please everyone take caution....I think being hardcore abs is great....but, if you fall and beat the crap out of yourself on every level....and then people join in to make you feel extra crappy....it can put you in a bad place.

I've been there....and I can see how this unfolded. I loved her, she was in no way toxic....but, her death has me very sad.

I may have said a few things about a person that is toxic and abusive to me. But, I wanted to be honest with the board. I am sure she responded with her toxic attitude.....I just refused to visit the site and read....for my well being. I take this stuff seriously. Getting 34 nasty texts.....can knock someone down and not up. I was just in good space to deal with it....but, will not tolerate it......and going to the funeral that I am now going to....makes me know....that I made the right choice.

I see so many people get shook up over what is posted on this site.....I know that I have personally been attacked....and I don't think....sending someone 34 nasty texts or imploding on anyone is the way to do it.

KY...was I direct enough My friend died. And yes, I am over emotional right now.

[CanToo]

af day Wed 31 Oct

Sun
:l

[kuya]

af day Wed 31 Oct

Yep SUN ...... Loving your directness, this is your place where these things can be said.

As Cantoo said :l Sun

[TheSunFlower]

af day Wed 31 Oct

Sorry KY....I meant that as a joke. I think you actually called me 'abrasive"....I am that too. And many othe things)

I am hurt and saddened right now. She is one of the biggest reasons I detached from AA. I saw what they did to her after she relapsed after 13 years. They were not kind to her at all.

I think AA is great.....and anyone going keep going. I can not. I have spoken to my AA friends and they all understand.

I am not bullet proof. If I live long enough.....I can't 100% say that I will never drink again. And I can not have friendships built on that alone.....after 13 years....all she had was her "sober" friends and all turned on her on a dime. I don't want or need friends like that. I so tried to be there for her, but she was too far gone when it all went downhill.

I have watched this thread evolve....from harsh words to someone who drank....then depending on the friend level....be kind when someone fell. I was one who spoke up and said....stop beating people up. Man did I get thrashed on that.

If this is hardcore abs thread....that shows no kindness (ony to certain people)....I need to leave. I may drink tomorrow or 13 years from now....maybe never again....who really knows. This is a wicked battle we are in....and am raw.

For me...I make it fun to be sober. Like getting the tea....and then being asked what I mixed with it. I just have fun with the 90% who don't get it. No harm. I come home sober and that at the end of the day is all that really matters to me. How I did it......varies by day.

Am an alkie I don't know. I can stop. I don't drink anything that is put in front of me. And quite frankly.....I don't care. I just know that I like being sober. Is that not enough....the person I mentioned.....tried to quizz me on charater defects....sure I have 'em....but, who really cares. I can spend my panties in a wad over something so stupid....."as I am too direct or abrasive"..."so stop being me"...or I can just be me. I like me...even if you don't.

Seeing my friend die from this type of thinking....I'll just be "me" for the moment. I like me. And for today that is enough.

Sorry....so emotional. I don't think I'll be able to check in. We are leaving tonight to get to all the viewings and funeral.

Do people die from this yes....but, for the most part it mental.

I am off to a funeral...

[Determinator]

af day Wed 31 Oct

wow Sun, so sad to hear of this tragedy to someone so close. AL is a heartless and savage creature no doubt.
I feel like ass today (mostly mental but also my stomach) will be going on a fishing trip tomorrow (hoping for calm seas).
I do indeed have my reservations about speaking openly of my issue. for one thing I have security clearances to consider. but my my boss does know as I've been open with him. I just don't need to spread it among the ranks as I think that may be imprudent.
have an early morning, so must pack my things.

be well everyone, and thank you all for your support