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December Determination ~ week 2

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    December Determination ~ week 2

    "You are what your deep, driving desire is. As your desire is, so is your will. As your will is, so is your deed. As your deed is, so is your destiny."
    – Brihadaranyaka Upanishad

    Welcome to week 2!

    Catbuddy, I completely understand what you mean about filling your af time with common daily activities and duties that were previously pushed aside. Thank you for your thoughtful post. I am so happy for you that you have started this journey of reclamation of yourself! ~ Especially for your son's sake. How old is he? My drinking never took over my life to the extent that you describe. However, I was heading there. I was getting to the point that I didn't want to do many activities of daily living without wine on board. This had even started to include my work. If I had reports to write on the weekend, I would have wine with me. I can't believe I did that. I believe the next step would have been the wine only, let the rest be da**ed! BTW, I read one of your posts on the af Daily about your son and his language issues. I am a Speech Therapist in a special needs preschool program, so we have something in common. I am pleased to hear your son has made such wonderful progress. You deserve credit for that.:goodjob:

    Pmom, your dinner sounds really delicious. I have not followed the link Lav provided but I fully intend to explore it today! Thanks Lav!

    Cyn, LBH, Rusty, Star, Rustop, Chill, Kas, IMT, nurdl, Mick, et al., Have a great AF Sunday!
    Dill

    Dont forget, you can: start late, start over, be unsure, try and fail AND STILL SUCCEED!

    If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

    #2
    December Determination ~ week 2

    Good morning to all...

    Thanks Dill for starting out the new week thread and meaningful quote. Appreciated your thoughtful comments about detaching from adult children's struggles as best I can. It is just life to have things happen, both bad and good. No one is spared suffering at times. That is why believing in something is so important to me. I watched a very disturbing documentary, Religulous with Bill Mahr, making fun of and ripping apart all religions. Unfortunately it made sense, although as usual, he was cutting and cruel. I wondered what he believes in...because at the end of the day, what does life mean, why are we here?

    LBH, would love to see a picture of your tree.

    Pap, what a fun and interesting day.

    I woke up feeling guilty and worried, can't quite figure it out. So, I will make sure to eat healthy, get exercise and get my house in order. Actually, I think I am getting stressed out about Christmas, what to send people, what to buy, and I just don't want to do it or spend the money. Bah humbug.

    Hello to Chill, Lav, Rusty, Cyn, CatB, Rustop, and all. Have a good day.
    Formerly known as redhibiscus

    Comment


      #3
      December Determination ~ week 2

      Good Sunday morning friends!

      No sun, rain but not too terribly cold so I shouldn't complain

      Love the quote Dill ~ so true!
      Goes well with the quote I have hanging over my desk reminding us to keep our words sweet because we may have to eat them

      Catbuddy, the chicken poop is recycled right into the garden here. I get great veggies!!! So glad to hear you are moving forward on your journey. My son was diagnosed with ADHD when he was in kindergarten. It was not easy but with a lot of hard work he has grown into a fine, successful young man, college graduate & all. Another great reason to stay the course!

      Star, remember the major mood swing my daughter had last Sunday? Yeah, well, I still haven't heard from her
      I am aware of some of the problems my daughter & SIL have but there may be even more going on that I don't know about & this hurts. I would love to be able to fix things for them but I just can not. My mood has been kind of odd for a while now too, hence no decorating done, little shopping done for the holidays, etc.

      In honor of our Bah Humbug moods:



      Have a great AF day everyone!
      Lav
      AF since 03/26/09
      NF since 05/19/09
      Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

      Comment


        #4
        December Determination ~ week 2

        Star, I?m sorry you exposed yourself to meaningless negativity by watching that show. The premise of the show is so lacking in maturity it reminds me of high school?.the ?cool? people mocking and ridiculing those that are ?uncool? (in their minds). ?Cutting and cruel? as you said. Let me ask you this: As a child, did you ever have something you really liked and thought was wonderful? Then along comes some other kid/s and seeing you enjoying something they start making fun and mocking and ridiculing it. You become confused and you go to your parent or an older sibling/friend and you are so sad. They ask you why and you tell them. Then they say something like, ?Don?t pay any attention to them. They are just jealous.? This is the same. IMHO, Bill Mahr and people of his ilk are jealous of believers. They have no understanding of it, no belief of their own, so they mock. It?s a tired scenario that has played out since people inhabited the earth. If they had any sense of love for their fellow man, they would simply live and let live. "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." Maybe he missed those teachings because he is a non-believer!:H I pity people that have to strengthen their own ego by ridiculing others for whatever the reason.

        Lav, I am still with you on the whole Christmas thing. Maybe today will be the day that breaks my Christmas log-jam! I'm going shopping with a friend...for Christmas gifts. Wish me luck!
        Dill

        Dont forget, you can: start late, start over, be unsure, try and fail AND STILL SUCCEED!

        If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

        Comment


          #5
          December Determination ~ week 2

          Just posted this on last week's thread, durrrrrrrrrr! Anyway, so hello to week 2!
          ---------------------------------------------------
          Happy Sunday all Determined ones -

          Cat, thanks so much for sharing your story - you are truly inspiring. The steps you are taking sound huge, not like just baby steps. Congrats on your journey and your continued AF-ness.

          Star - glad you are home safe and sound. Ah, yes, mixed emotions...but you seem to be dealing with everything with a clear eye and a clear head. I'm with you on missing snow -- that's why I came back to a winter climate, but outside of the 22" snowfall here October of '11, there's been next to nothing. We just had 3 days of 40 degrees and rain - what a nice snowfall that would have been...

          LBH - a 7' metal cherry tree? I love the sound of it, wherever did you get such a thing? Your posting was positively fragrant with the essence of mountain-y pine, it may have pushed me over into the holiday spirit. And the famous cabinet is moving elsewhere...my my things are really happening here on the thread.

          Chill - take care, I'm sure you are absolutely spent after your trip. What an angel you were to go...
          to the light

          Comment


            #6
            December Determination ~ week 2

            Hi Cyn!
            That same weather you described is still here, yuck. My poor chickens are looking muddy.
            Hope you have a good day.

            Dill, that person who ridicules others to feed his never satisfied ego = YB
            I've always known that about him but looked the other way. I should have given him the boot 40 years ago.
            AF since 03/26/09
            NF since 05/19/09
            Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

            Comment


              #7
              December Determination ~ week 2

              A good day. I actually took a few hours off of worrying about How Will Everything Get Done?, and spent empty time, trying to enjoy the relationship with time and space.

              At the moment, I'm roasting sweet potatoes and pears at the same time as chicken pieces....it is the 2nd night of Hannukah, and as my husband celebrates that Holiday, we have the candelabra set up and ready to light. I love this holiday...it's like lighting the Advent candles of my youth...as the light dims in the natural world, the candle light strengthens....

              I also had the surprising opportunity to clear out my raised bed vegetable gardens, which were sadly neglected all summer long.. It was like erasing Shame -- I felt so incompetent, looking at the lovely raised beds all overgrown. There seemed to be no time to take care of it all - getting ready to be away yet again, etc - but now it is done. And the mower is run out of gas and winterized! I feel grateful for the late spring weather, as much as I complain about it. In my previous MN home, the thought of a garden being able to be worked in December is laughable! I have to say that the brussel sprouts were still bearing, and so I grabbed some mini 'sprouts' for our dinner tonight. Although the lilies that I trimmed were sprouting buds....aaaargh!!)

              Love to all, and best wishes for a great Monday -
              to the light

              Comment


                #8
                December Determination ~ week 2

                Hi all,

                Thanks for the warm welcome. My son is 9, and tonight he fell asleep in my arms (we came home late from a party). Ahhhhhhhh. So content.

                My garden was non-existent this year; couldn't stay sober enough on the weekend to plant. But one tomato plant came up on its own from last year's roots/seeds. It was on the end of the tomato row, all on its own, but bravely bore fruit all summer. I loved that plant. I am going to have a wonderful garden this Spring! I will share pictures, too.

                I hope some holiday joy comes your way as we start week 2.

                :l Cat
                "It is easier to maintain than to start from the bottom again. I can't go back there." Byrdie

                AF since Oct 2, 2012

                Comment


                  #9
                  December Determination ~ week 2

                  :welcome: cat and big hello to everyone else

                  Some very interesting, insightful posts again this week. I learn so much from this thread. Wish I had more time to post.

                  Things are busy, busy. I am gradually working my way through a long list and bit by bit am catching up.

                  Wishing everyone a wonderful week 2.

                  Rustop

                  Comment


                    #10
                    December Determination ~ week 2

                    Good morning to all...

                    Dill, thanks for taking the time for feedback on my religious dilemma. I agree Bill Mahr is an a## and was rude and condescending to the people he interviewed, but the people he interviewed could not logically defend their beliefs either. I guess the nastiness, hatred of women, and judgementalism in all belief systems is not spiritual to me. In fact, the men in charge use their power to hurt women and children with no accountability, a real and scary thing. For example, reproductive issues are not covered by many insurance companies, especially if affiliated with a church group, but ED is. I do not want to offend anyone, but I am sick of the hatred in churches. Please don't tell me the LGBT population is going to hell either. OK, I'll stop.

                    Cyn, how wonderful to get some yardwork done in December. I was able to complete alot yesterday inside, so feel good today about going to work. Still lots of Christmas stuff to do, I am ordering and sending things online today, then next weekend finishing up at the stores. Hanukah sounds like a wonderful celebration with the lights and delicious food. The best thing to do is take it day by day, I guess. Are you staying home for the holidays this year? Weatherwise, I think the snow will come, sometimes it just starts later. Good to have you on the thread.

                    Lav, sometimes I think our daughters take us for granted. My daughter is crabby and not feeling well still, but nothing I can do about it. Just leave her alone to work it out. The way you describe YB does sound extremely difficult...a taker and not a giver. It would be nice to have more balance with him.

                    Chill, thinking about you and hoping to hear from you soon, when you are ready.

                    Nothing like a good cup of coffee in the a.m. I am enjoying one right now. Hope you all get to too, if that is what you like. Have a good day.
                    Formerly known as redhibiscus

                    Comment


                      #11
                      December Determination ~ week 2

                      Good morning all,

                      Overslept but not complaining

                      Catbuddy, nice to hear you are enjoying your AF life. It sounds like your son is as well, that's great! I love gardening & with this huge property I have I can grow anything I want. I just can't deal with the summer heat anymore, the last few summers have been extremely HOT! Hope you have a fabulous garden next year

                      Greetings Rustop, Cyn, Star & everyone!
                      Star, I don't have much tolerance for the Bill Mahr, Rush Limbaugh type personalities on TV & radio. The words 'pompous asses' come to mind :H
                      I hope our daughters get their respective acts together by Christmas. I'm just giving mine all the space she needs & trust she will work out her difficulties. Hope your daughter feels better soon.

                      OK, gotta run. Have a great AF Monday everyone!
                      Lav
                      AF since 03/26/09
                      NF since 05/19/09
                      Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                      Comment


                        #12
                        December Determination ~ week 2

                        Hi everyone, good morning, happy Monday. Ok maybe thats a bit of a stretch. December is half way over almost? I got more than a skiff of snow here.. had a photo here but its an old one apparently so I ve taken it out.

                        I dont have much to add to the discussion re the Bill Mahers and Rush Limbaughs of the world. I actually LIKE the message Bill is giving, he is correct, some organized religions are definetly NOT about the sweetness of Jesus, (in fact they are about profits and power) but he certainly isnt kind about it. Its unfortunate but we have all shifted into an age when civility, decorum and kindness is considered boring. Its got to have obnoxiousness, violence, shock value, some kind of filth or it doesnt sell. Searching for relief, Mr. Kaslo and I stumbled upon a British series called Doc Martin, hilarious without the stream of invective. I think its on Netflics if anyone is interested.

                        Well its past my monday morning goofing off time. They seem to want me to work.

                        Love to all, Kas
                        Kaslo

                        Stopped the madness: February 14, 2011
                        Status: Happy:h

                        Comment


                          #13
                          December Determination ~ week 2

                          Hey Kas,
                          I remember that pic from last winter

                          I've seen a few episodes of Doc Martin on Netflix - good!

                          I need to get some work done too - don't know what I'm waiting for :H
                          AF since 03/26/09
                          NF since 05/19/09
                          Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                          Comment


                            #14
                            December Determination ~ week 2

                            I watch Doc Martin religiously!:H

                            The problem with organized religion is that it is organized by humans and is therefore fatally flawed. The religions do stray far from the original teachings in many cases.
                            Dill

                            Dont forget, you can: start late, start over, be unsure, try and fail AND STILL SUCCEED!

                            If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you will find an excuse.

                            Comment


                              #15
                              December Determination ~ week 2

                              Not to change the subject or anything :H

                              I'm still thinking about cheap heart healthy meals.......
                              I made one of my favs tonight - barley & sweet potato pilaf - yum
                              It's vegan, lowfat & a very tastey recipe from the Forks Over Knives cookbook (the plant-based way to health). If you ever get a chance to watch the documentary on Netflix - do so!

                              Dill, I agree with you about organized religions. I just cannot bring myself to go back on a regular basis.
                              AF since 03/26/09
                              NF since 05/19/09
                              Success comes one day at a time :thumbs:

                              Comment

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