Well here we are folks...Monday morning yet again...yipee..complete with Chrimbo tree and decs now..did an excellent job of supervising it all....and now my instructions are quite clear...you WILL enjoy Christmas ..understand???? :H
Right enough of the festivities...movin swiftly on...tea and coffee available
Affers blondie how are you?so the jokes remind you of Tommy Cooper do they??Just like that....you will be fine..after all this time you know you can do it...KY is probably right....its a subconscious link to being involved on here
Mornin KY....oops affers..you ok?
Hiya TDN hope you are ok...and things get sorted out this week for you..interesting where the name three dog night comes from...there is a dispute as to whether Inui Indian ,Californian, or Aboriginal...what isnt disputed is the fact it was a gauge of how cold it was at night times...they would huddle up to their dogs...hence it was a i/2/3/ dog night last night..wow...the stuff you learn on here!!!:H
Mmmmooooorrrrnnnniinnggg Lav...now hows that for a super slow start??Coffee for you ...eh no ..not a million years ago...but not far off it!!!!have a great day
Hi Pauly...you ok?....did you do all your Chrimbo shopping?Sure?....ok then what did you get me?:Hhope daughter n baby are well
Mornin PPQ...I know it was :l...how are you? Community wise I would have thought you are pretty busy at the moment..
Morning YAH Hi all--quiet time here, just doing some cleaning and decorating and watching a little football. ..Now try it all at once :H you doing ok?
Hi Det..yep as much as I appreciate the great outdoors...think you were taking it a wee bit far...no sleeping bag???
Apart from tired, wet cold miserable and aching...you ok???:H
Scottish lass good morning to you...sorry that youre weekend ...was crap....put the issues to bed and move on..have you got a plan written up if it happens again..cos thats when it bites your bum.You know what you are going into ..at the moment be strong..one day at a time....oh yes...this is your post " If you will still have me, see you all tomorrow."..........you are here ,we are here all part of the same team..end of discussion
Good morning lucky ..and welcome..how are you? like your avatar..especially at this time...2006 you joined..wowee you must have seen some to ings and fro ings on this site
Morning Cantoo........whats wrong? can we help?
Mornin Nurdl....you ok? think sometimes we try and blame things like feeling down , rubbish tired and crap on maintaining an af lifestyle..Dont think that is neccessarily true,,,think what we are not doing is grabbing a drink when we feel like crap..and so it all seems magnified...anyway youve got a flash purple car to zoom about in!!!
Right peeps...time to go,Strangely enough in this the "festive" season is when you fell at your lowest ebb..I felt it the other day over something really silly...
Just think tho...there are a lot of people worse off than us at this very moment
anyone heard from shue and the others?
Take care
I phoned the local gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits. He said, "How flexible are you?" I said, "I can't make Tuesdays."
"He said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library'. I thought 'That's a turn-up for the books.'"
"So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give me a lift?" I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'"
"You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice."
"So I went down my local ice-cream shop, and said 'I want to buy an ice-cream'. He said Hundreds & thousands?' I said 'We'll start with one.' He said 'Knickerbocker glory?' I said 'I do get a certain amount of freedom in these trousers, yes.'
I went to Millets and said 'I want to buy a tent.' He said 'To camp?', I said [butchly] 'Sorry, I want to buy a tent.' I said 'I also want to buy a caravan.' He said 'Camper?' I said [campily] 'Make your mind up
I bought a train ticket and the driver said "Eurostar" I said "Well I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin? Still, at least it's comfortable on Eurostar, it's murder on the Orient Express...
I'm so lazy I've got a smoke alarm with a snooze button.
I bought some Armageddon cheese today, and it said on the packet 'Best Before End...'
So I went to buy a watch, and the man in the shop said "Analogue." I said "No, just a watch."
I went into a shop and I said, "Can someone sell me a kettle." The bloke said "Kenwood" I said, "Where is he?"
So I went in to a pet shop. I said, "Can I buy a goldfish?" The guy said, "Do you want an aquarium?" I said, "I don't care what star sign it is."
I was in this restaurant and I asked for something herby. They gave me a Volkswagen with no driver.
I went to the doctor. I said to him "I'm frightened of lapels." He said, "You've got cholera." So I met the bloke who invented crosswords today. I can't remember his name, it's P something T something R.
So I went down the local supermarket, I said "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it", he said "Those are pickled onions".
So this bloke says to me, "Can I come in your house and talk about your carpets?" I thought "That's all I need, a Je-hoover's witness".
I was having dinner with my boss and his wife and she said to me, "How many potatoes would you like ?". I said "Ooh, I'll just have one please". She said "It's OK, you don?t have to be polite" "Alright" I said "I'll just have one then, you stupid cow
So Batman came up to me & he hit me over the head with a vase & he went T'PAU! I said "Don't you mean KAPOW?? He said "No, I've got china in my hand."
So I went to the dentist. He said "Say Aaah." I said "Why?" He said "My dog's died.'" "Now, most dentist's chairs go up and down, don't they? The one I was in went back and forwards. I thought 'This is unusual'. And the dentist said to me "Sir get out of the filing cabinet.'"
"So I got home, and the phone was ringing. I picked it up, and said 'Who's speaking please?' And a voice said 'You are.'"
"So I rang up my local swimming baths. I said 'Is that the local swimming baths?' He said 'It depends where you're calling from.'"
"So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.' He said 'I'm not stopping you.'
So I told my girlfriend I had a job in a bowling alley. She said "Tenpin?" I said, "No, it's a permanent job."
So I told my mum that I'd opened a theatre. She said, "Are you having me on?" I said, "Well I'll give you an audition, but I'm not promising you anything."
So this cowboy walks in to a German car showroom and he says "Audi!"
So I fancied a game of darts with my mate. He said, "Nearest the bull goes first" He went "Baah" and I went "Moo" He said "You're closest"
So I met this bloke with a didgeridoo and he was playing Dancing Queen on it. I thought, that's aboriginal.
I visited the offices of the RSPCA today. It's tiny, you couldn't swing a cat in there.
So I said to a Scottsman 'did you have terrible spots as a kid?' He said 'ac ne'
Right enough of the festivities...movin swiftly on...tea and coffee available
Affers blondie how are you?so the jokes remind you of Tommy Cooper do they??Just like that....you will be fine..after all this time you know you can do it...KY is probably right....its a subconscious link to being involved on here
Mornin KY....oops affers..you ok?
Hiya TDN hope you are ok...and things get sorted out this week for you..interesting where the name three dog night comes from...there is a dispute as to whether Inui Indian ,Californian, or Aboriginal...what isnt disputed is the fact it was a gauge of how cold it was at night times...they would huddle up to their dogs...hence it was a i/2/3/ dog night last night..wow...the stuff you learn on here!!!:H
Mmmmooooorrrrnnnniinnggg Lav...now hows that for a super slow start??Coffee for you ...eh no ..not a million years ago...but not far off it!!!!have a great day
Hi Pauly...you ok?....did you do all your Chrimbo shopping?Sure?....ok then what did you get me?:Hhope daughter n baby are well
Mornin PPQ...I know it was :l...how are you? Community wise I would have thought you are pretty busy at the moment..
Morning YAH Hi all--quiet time here, just doing some cleaning and decorating and watching a little football. ..Now try it all at once :H you doing ok?
Hi Det..yep as much as I appreciate the great outdoors...think you were taking it a wee bit far...no sleeping bag???
Apart from tired, wet cold miserable and aching...you ok???:H
Scottish lass good morning to you...sorry that youre weekend ...was crap....put the issues to bed and move on..have you got a plan written up if it happens again..cos thats when it bites your bum.You know what you are going into ..at the moment be strong..one day at a time....oh yes...this is your post " If you will still have me, see you all tomorrow."..........you are here ,we are here all part of the same team..end of discussion
Good morning lucky ..and welcome..how are you? like your avatar..especially at this time...2006 you joined..wowee you must have seen some to ings and fro ings on this site
Morning Cantoo........whats wrong? can we help?
Mornin Nurdl....you ok? think sometimes we try and blame things like feeling down , rubbish tired and crap on maintaining an af lifestyle..Dont think that is neccessarily true,,,think what we are not doing is grabbing a drink when we feel like crap..and so it all seems magnified...anyway youve got a flash purple car to zoom about in!!!
Right peeps...time to go,Strangely enough in this the "festive" season is when you fell at your lowest ebb..I felt it the other day over something really silly...
Just think tho...there are a lot of people worse off than us at this very moment
anyone heard from shue and the others?
Take care
I phoned the local gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits. He said, "How flexible are you?" I said, "I can't make Tuesdays."
"He said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library'. I thought 'That's a turn-up for the books.'"
"So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give me a lift?" I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'"
"You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice."
"So I went down my local ice-cream shop, and said 'I want to buy an ice-cream'. He said Hundreds & thousands?' I said 'We'll start with one.' He said 'Knickerbocker glory?' I said 'I do get a certain amount of freedom in these trousers, yes.'
I went to Millets and said 'I want to buy a tent.' He said 'To camp?', I said [butchly] 'Sorry, I want to buy a tent.' I said 'I also want to buy a caravan.' He said 'Camper?' I said [campily] 'Make your mind up
I bought a train ticket and the driver said "Eurostar" I said "Well I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin? Still, at least it's comfortable on Eurostar, it's murder on the Orient Express...
I'm so lazy I've got a smoke alarm with a snooze button.
I bought some Armageddon cheese today, and it said on the packet 'Best Before End...'
So I went to buy a watch, and the man in the shop said "Analogue." I said "No, just a watch."
I went into a shop and I said, "Can someone sell me a kettle." The bloke said "Kenwood" I said, "Where is he?"
So I went in to a pet shop. I said, "Can I buy a goldfish?" The guy said, "Do you want an aquarium?" I said, "I don't care what star sign it is."
I was in this restaurant and I asked for something herby. They gave me a Volkswagen with no driver.
I went to the doctor. I said to him "I'm frightened of lapels." He said, "You've got cholera." So I met the bloke who invented crosswords today. I can't remember his name, it's P something T something R.
So I went down the local supermarket, I said "I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it", he said "Those are pickled onions".
So this bloke says to me, "Can I come in your house and talk about your carpets?" I thought "That's all I need, a Je-hoover's witness".
I was having dinner with my boss and his wife and she said to me, "How many potatoes would you like ?". I said "Ooh, I'll just have one please". She said "It's OK, you don?t have to be polite" "Alright" I said "I'll just have one then, you stupid cow
So Batman came up to me & he hit me over the head with a vase & he went T'PAU! I said "Don't you mean KAPOW?? He said "No, I've got china in my hand."
So I went to the dentist. He said "Say Aaah." I said "Why?" He said "My dog's died.'" "Now, most dentist's chairs go up and down, don't they? The one I was in went back and forwards. I thought 'This is unusual'. And the dentist said to me "Sir get out of the filing cabinet.'"
"So I got home, and the phone was ringing. I picked it up, and said 'Who's speaking please?' And a voice said 'You are.'"
"So I rang up my local swimming baths. I said 'Is that the local swimming baths?' He said 'It depends where you're calling from.'"
"So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.' He said 'I'm not stopping you.'
So I told my girlfriend I had a job in a bowling alley. She said "Tenpin?" I said, "No, it's a permanent job."
So I told my mum that I'd opened a theatre. She said, "Are you having me on?" I said, "Well I'll give you an audition, but I'm not promising you anything."
So this cowboy walks in to a German car showroom and he says "Audi!"
So I fancied a game of darts with my mate. He said, "Nearest the bull goes first" He went "Baah" and I went "Moo" He said "You're closest"
So I met this bloke with a didgeridoo and he was playing Dancing Queen on it. I thought, that's aboriginal.
I visited the offices of the RSPCA today. It's tiny, you couldn't swing a cat in there.
So I said to a Scottsman 'did you have terrible spots as a kid?' He said 'ac ne'
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