Christmas started early here...last night we ate a whole box of choccy biccies...so need to get more..makes the new year resolution easier to work out!!
Afternoon KY...glad your moods are getting a we bit straighter..soinds like you are getting back to your mad self...good for you
Mornin Nurdl...how are you today?So you used to have your own photo business did you? see thats the beauty of digital..if they are rubbish you just delete them, which I can assure you in my case is 99% of the time!!How did the yoga go? I was actually thinking of doing that...just for the stretching and suppleness exercises...hmmm a lot of just going to s happening in my head at the moment!!!
TDN....good morning to you ..and well done on your 31st day now...such a pity you cant tell these muppets that you are dealing with ref you car and licence "oh and by the way , I dont drink any more"..Did you get the present made for your friend?
good morning Lav...heres a coffee to run round the yard with chasing the puppy! how are you today?All the Christmas shopping done now?and the prep finished?wow Lav what a lovely dog..yep definitely your grandson needs to protect him!:H thanks for posting the pic
Mornin PPQ....:l well -21.. wow guess you wont be out too much today!You sound a whole lot better today so well done you.So you are working in a casino today? what does that involve? ...if I being nosey...I am!!:H Have a great day
Mornin Yah..how are you?Yep my daughter is here too..isnt it strange how your routines go to rat ?All of the sudden the telly is filled with more crap than usual, things appear different places etc...and now she is talking about coming back next year!!...hmm that will be a discussion point after Christmas!!
Mornin Det...how are you? you sound definitely on the perkier side..Sometimes I watch a programme on the telly called auction hunters..where people buy storage lots that have been left...some of the stuff found is unreal.
Mornin Cantoo, wow you be careful with that frost!! how are you today? yes methinks I have more of the same coming with my daughter...need to box a bit clever tho...otherwise will end up with her mother siding too!!Im sure it will be sorted out..like the yoga idea tho..I seem drawn to that for some reason too..You have a good day
Rabsy...how are you today after bimbling round the expensive Scotch shoppie?You know,I have got the complete set of the Royal Doulton birds of prey and also the owls..they are whisky decanters cast as birds of prey.I have got 12 of them,all full of McCallans whisky...not once have I been tempted to open them, nor will I ...strange that...works out about 7 pints of Scotch!!
Right onwards and upwards...Moscow have a great day everyone
A man goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waving at him.
She says hello.
He's rather taken aback because he can't place where he knows her from. So, he says,
'Do you know me?' to which she replies, 'I think you're the father of one of my kids,'
Now his mind races back to the only time he has ever been unfaithful to his wife and says, 'Are
you the stripper from the bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table with all my buddies
watching while your partner whipped my butt with wet celery???'
She looks into his eyes and says calmly, 'No, I'm your son's teacher.'
Won't be in touch for a while, I'm being investigated for stealing inflatable seaside goods...........................................go tta lilo.
I went on Dragons Den the other night and showed them my dads old shot gun, Peter Jones said "and whats your idea" i replied "it's a simple concept Peter just put the cash in the fking bag.
Paddy on a first aid course and the instructor asks, "What would you do,if your child swallowed the front door key ?" Paddy replied, "Climb through the window!"
Paddy and some of his mates decided to go on a voyage to were the Titanic sank and go down to have a look at it. When they got there Paddy asked if he could go down on his own first so they all agreed. with Paddy on board they lifted the vessel into the water and down Paddy went. After some hrs,. later they brought the vessel up and lifted it back on board,the hatch was opened and Paddy got out and stood on deck just staring at them all. Whats up Paddy one shouted, what did yeh see lad, Paddy just looked at them and said. Your not goin to believe this lads but after all these years the swimming pool is still full of water
After many years of trying to win the Lotto this bloke hits the jack pot 42Mill,. After getting his wins he does all the packing for the holiday of a life time. As hes about to leave the house he shouts to his wife, get your coat on ..his wife shouts back."Are we going on holiday love." he shouts back, "no I am Im just turning the heating off"
Last week was my birthday and I didn't feel very well waking up on that morning. I went downstairs for breakfast hoping my husband would be pleasant and say, 'Happy Birthday!', and possibly have a small present for me. As it turned out, he barely said good morning, let alone ' Happy Birthday.' I thought.... well, that's marriage for you, but the kids.... they will remember. My kids came bounding d
own stairs to breakfasts and didn't say a word..
So when I left for the office, I felt pretty low and somewhat despondent. As I walked into my office, my handsome Boss Rick, said, 'Good Morning, lady, and by the way Happy Birthday! ' It felt a little better that at least someone had remembered. I worked until one o'clock , when Rick knocked on my door and said, 'You know, it's such a beautiful...day outside, and it is your birthday, what do you say we go out to lunch, just you and me....' I said, 'Thanks, Rick, that's the greatest thing I've heard all day. Let's go!'
We went to lunch. but we didn't go where we normally would go. He chose instead a quiet bistro with a private table. We had two martinis each and I enjoyed the meal tremendously. On the way back to the office, Rick said, 'You know, it's such a beautiful day... we don't need to go straight back to the office, do we?' I responded, 'I guess not. What do you have in mind?' He said, 'Let's drop by my place, it's just around the corner.'
After arriving at his house, Rick turned to me and said, If you don't mind, I'm going to step into the bedroom for just a moment. I'll be right back.' 'Ok.' I nervously replied. He went into the bedroom and, after a couple of minutes, he came out carrying a huge birthday cake ... followed by my husband my kids, and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing 'Happy Birthday'. And I just sat there.... On the couch.... Naked..
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
I've just called in to see my dyslexic friend- he was busy covering his penis with black shoe polish.I said to him "You idiot ! you're supposed to turn your clock back !.
A bloke walk's into a bookshop and says: "Do you have that self help book for men with small cocks?"
Female assistant replies: "I don't think its in yet."
He replies: "Yeah that's the one.
I've invented a golf ball that automatically goes in the hole if it comes within a foot.They've been a huge success.Just don't carry them in your back pocket.
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