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    #31
    af day Thurs 17 Jan

    Det - Lots of cyber-hugs to you. Sorry to see you hurting like this.
    much love

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      #32
      af day Thurs 17 Jan

      Afternoon abs

      I think my modem problem was due to the heat
      Anyway, I wrote a long post but can't find it (I smartly saved it somewhere, so I may post it next week when I find it and it is completely irrelevant!):H

      Off "up the coast" for a few days next week (shh. birthday) And now heading out for lunch - spicy kung pao chicken with extra cut chillies

      Will try and get back on tonight so I don't fall too far behind again.

      Great jokes Mick!
      :welcome:

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        #33
        af day Thurs 17 Jan

        Hey Det, please take it easy on yourself. You are a fine person. An injury is hard to cope with, but healing can happen, it takes a while. Get into the pool to do your physio as soon as you can, you can get it back. BTW? Have you thought of training for a chef? You'd be dy no mite, Det. Dont be worried about switching at your age, lots of people get a second third forth career later in life, and by my books you are a youngster.
        Kaslo

        Stopped the madness: February 14, 2011
        Status: Happy:h

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          #34
          af day Thurs 17 Jan

          Hi guys, my friends, and my home.

          I'll add my two cents. I moved on from the nest as I think it is a place of tumbling - early sobriety feels like a turtle trying to make it out to sea. Once you are beyond that tumble, it feels selfish to take up air space if you doing well and others aren't. Yet I wasn't ready to consistently offer the support needed, too early in my own discovery. So I tried a few threads, and found this and the weekly ab thread.

          I would be sad to think it was time to move in a few months. So that tells me I'm nowhere near ready. I think two years sounds like the right timeframe for "long term abstinence." I also hope that Mick, Lav, Kas and others (Molly?) who are over six months feel they can let their hair down here, vent, get support, etc. That to me is the primary difference from the nest or just starting out threads - we are no longer in triage mode.

          HOWEVER, and a big HOWEVER, a slip can come at any time, and if this is where your peeps are, then you should post that here. Hopefully the response is enough.

          I'm going to post to Det now.

          Love all,
          Cat

          Mick, CFO is Chief Financial Officer, as YahYah said. My company is audited, so we close the books, and are reviewed for decisions, process and consistency. We also plan the upcoming year, and present the budget to the BOD. This has all been just so much more intense due to the merger we have pursued. Today my finance manager told me she can't do the job anymore, and will train her replacement. She may stay in a new role if it is sane enough. We have burned her out through the insanity of last year. It is crazy right now.
          "It is easier to maintain than to start from the bottom again. I can't go back there." Byrdie

          AF since Oct 2, 2012

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            #35
            af day Thurs 17 Jan

            Hi Det,

            It has been an awful time for you, and I feel for your pain and depression. You don't need to apologize to us about drinking. It is going to make the situation worse for you, though. Try to stop and find the path again. Feel free to PM me any time.

            Cat
            "It is easier to maintain than to start from the bottom again. I can't go back there." Byrdie

            AF since Oct 2, 2012

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              #36
              af day Thurs 17 Jan

              TheSunFlower;1445914 wrote: Just a mention to DET. Hang in there.....I have had a week of shitty stuff thrown at me. I wanted to drink so many times. Appparently, people don't want us to post here.....it seems a bit silly to me. If AF is your goal....you should be allowed to post here....getting advice. But, they seem to feel different. I am off this board and wish the very best for you.

              And I will repeat.....there is a thread for "people that are long term abstainers". Except they want to post here and "put rules on it".....personally.....you peopleshould be kicked off this thread....and moved over to the new one
              This is EXACTLY what I meant ..... If you had read properly SF, no one was saying that THIS monthly moderation should change or anyone should leave or not post.

              There is NO long term abstainers thread and Mick posed the question as to whether there should be and Molly said she had started one before. I, and some others, like the idea......it is a discussion.

              Because of where you currently are, you are sensitive and give an emotional response which then requires explanation, reassurance etc

              And who, exactly ARE you people? Nobody can be kicked off any thread.

              Anybody can post anywhere but there are certain threads I don't post on, like AA because I don't like the higher power stuff of AA. I would expect a long term abstainers thread to be, well, long term abstainers. But if long term abstainers don't want one then there is no point in starting one.

              Det. You know how much I respect you but something, yet to be uncovered, lies at the root of your inability to let this poison go. You are highly intelligent, but we know this can be an impediment to sobriety. I don't know how long you have been on this merry go round but it is painful to watch. Please seek some additional outside help. I write this with a heavy heart, but someone has to.

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                #37
                af day Thurs 17 Jan

                Take care Det. I don't know you very well but I do know a lot about vulnerability and depression and things caving in. and its bloody complicated with AL. You will get there - try to heal yourself - in ways that are possible and above all do-able.
                Lots of hugs from Treetops.

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                  #38
                  af day Thurs 17 Jan

                  Det, you've been on the right path for quite some time and inspired me and supported me in the holistic approach.

                  The Det I know and love is a fab and invenive chef, hikes and shoots, takes very cool photos and has an awsome array of knowledge on medical/ diet issues. He's been challenged by Paleo non believers and took the time to carefully explain all he research behind his choice. And what I lke the most is that everything is delievred with a brlliant sense of humor.

                  The depressed sounding Det that posted recently, I love too , he makes himself very scarce when he's like that and I really wish this was not the case but I understand.

                  Det, I don't know what happed that made the last 7 months so bad but I do remember you happy and in love and having a full and healthy life ... For a whole lot lot longer.

                  I hope your tenacity will once more kick in and you find what you need to do to get you past this. Things ALWAYS look soo much worse after one drinks. Tomorrow is a new day.

                  Xoxo
                  workaholic, shoeaholic and yes ... alcoholic

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