Was talking to a friend yesterday, on why she thought the numbers on this thread had dropped significantly, and how we could improve on it..or could we?After all this thread is about helping and sharing experiences on how to stop drinking,once past the initial days, .10 different people replied on this site yesterday,with 248 views,on the Newbies nest there were 38 separate people posting, and on the army 15.
Do you think we need to tweak this thread up at all? And if so how?Or is it a phase ...would be interesting to hear from some of the faces that have gone as to why they went...if you dont want to go public then pm me..after all its our thread so lets make it the best we can
tea and coffee available..and hot water with lemon...its my fasting day!!
Evening tt..how are you? on the way home now ...feet up and chill time is it? Looking through the threads ,yes there are quite a few from south of the line on here..looks like the sales of Speights and Castlemaine will be down!!Glad your daughters party went well...one line in there said it all...and my daughter was proud ..now if thats not a reason to sack the drink I dont know what is..well done :l
Evening blondie..glad you are feeling a wee bit better..yep we all get like that ..its like hitting a flat spot.In times like that you have to be double jointed and give yourself a kick up the ass..I know Ive just done it!!!So what have you been up to today?
Manflu has gone ..just down to a cold level now :H...strange talking bout holidays...yep just been looking too!!
Well done on not having a sneaky drink :applaud:it just aint worth it is it?
Morning Patrice....got news for you...the Jocks that left the parcel werent giving it to you...they were wanting it looking after..the beer was supposed to go in the fridge till they got back!!!
So how are you?All these discussions over vegemite and marmite!Personally, I cant stand either of them..Prefer a cup of Bovril laced with Lea and Perrins sauce!!!
Well hello Lav..tis the smartass here!!!!:H well is that lickle cupcake sitting all on its lonesome in the fridge still? I fear not!!You could have had it with your coffee this morning!!
How are you today?how did the kid free day turn out?Have you any plans for today?Have a great day anyway.
Good morning to you shelby,how are you today?day 31 for you now ..great.As far as cheating goes there is no such thing any and every way to stop al intake for me is acceptable..well stopping breathing aint that clever really...but apart from that :H..so go fir it girl ..well done
Det ...wow mate..yet again on another high note..excellent my friend..how are you? found a cracker yesterday...garlic salad in white vinegar...olives ,cloves of garlic, peppers etc all in vinegar..tastes lovely, but certainly reduces your friends list!!!
In answer to your question about Ikea...why would I go there for furniture???
Reminds me of a joke I heard which is quite appropriate bearing in mind all these allegations of sexual harrassment in the British Government
Why is our government like Ikea furniture? One screw and the cabinet is f..cked !
Morning PPQP...wow these lawyers are sure a pain ..do they get paid by the e-mail?Days gone it used to be they got paid for the letters that they sent out.
How are you today? apart from all that guff....."dingle nuts"..thought to myself now where have I heard that name before...and then bang ..Emmerdale Farm..Zak Dingle...go on tell me you watch that one too!!!
Anyway you have a great day
Morning Cat..you ok still cold over there? thought it was us getting all the crap weather .Any plans for tonight?
Morning SF ..how are you today?how long have you been into yoga? Seem to be quite a few on here into it..hows things on the af front with you ? still doing ok?
right peeps thats me offski..take care ..have a good one ..dont forget ,,any idea/suggestions welcome
A group of Americans was touring Ireland. One of the women in the group was a real curmudgeon, constantly complaining. The bus seats are uncomfortable. The food is terrible. It?s too hot. It?s too cold. The accommodations are awful.
The group arrived at the site of the famous Blarney Stone. ?Good luck will be followin? ya all your days if you kiss the Blarney Stone,?the guide said. ?Unfortunately, it?s being cleaned today and so no one will be able to kiss it. Perhaps we can come back tomorrow.?
?We can?t be here tomorrow,? the nasty woman shouted. ?We have some other boring tour to go on. So I guess we can?t kiss the stupid stone.?
?Well now,? the guide said, ?it is said that if you kiss someone who has kissed the stone, you?ll have the same good fortune.?
?And I suppose you?ve kissed the stone?? the woman scoffed.
?No, ma?am,? the frustrated guide said, ?but I?ve sat on it.?
How things have changed
Scenario : Jack goes quail hunting before school, pulls into school parking lot with shotgun in gun rack.
1962 ? Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack?s shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.
2012? School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.
Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.
1962 ? Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.
2012? Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.
Scenario: Jeffrey won?t be still in class, disrupts other students.
1962 ? Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by the Principal. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.
2012 ? Jeffrey given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADD. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a disability.
Scenario : Billy breaks a window in his neighbor?s car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.
1962 ? Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.
2012? Billy?s dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist tells Billy?s sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy?s mom has affair with psychologist.
Scenario : Pedro fails high school English.
1962 ? Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.
2012 ? Pedro?s cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro?s English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.
Scenario : Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red ant bed.
1962 ? Ants die.
2012- BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated, Johnny?s Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.>
Scenario : Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.
1962 ? In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2012? Mary is accused of being a s*xual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy.
A group of children were trying very hard to become accustomed to Nursery School.
The biggest hurdle they faced was that the teacher insisted on NO baby talk! You need to use ?Big People? words,? she was always reminding them.
She asked John what he had done over the weekend?
?I went to visit my Nana,? he replied.
?No, you went to visit your GRANDMOTHER. Use ?Big People? words!?
She then asked Mitchell what he had done
?I took a ride on a choo-choo?.
She said. ?No, you took a ride on a TRAIN. You must remember to use ?Big People? words?.
She then asked little Alex what he had done?
?I read a book? he replied.
That?s WONDERFUL!? the teacher said. ?What book did you read??
Alex thought real hard about it, then puffed out his chest with great pride, and said,
?Winnie the SHIT?
apologies blondie :H
Once upon a time there was a blonde with long hair, blue eyes, and she was sick of all the blonde jokes. One day, she decided to get a make over, so she cut and dyed her hair. She also went out and bought a new convertible.
She went driving down a country road and came across a herd of sheep. She stopped and called the sheepherder over. ?That?s a nice flock of sheep.?, she said.
?Well thank you.?, said the herder.
?Tell you what. I have a proposition for you.?, said the woman.
?Okay.?, replied the herder.
?If I can guess the exact number of sheep in your flock, can I take one home??, asked the woman.
?Sure.?, said the sheepherder.
So, the girl sat up and looked at the herd for a second and then replied, ?382″.
?Wow.?, said the herder. ?That is exactly right. Go ahead and pick out the sheep you want to take home.? So the woman went and picked one out and put it in her car. Upon watching this, the herder approached the woman and offered, ?Okay, now I have a proposition for you?.
?What is it??, queried the woman. ?If I can guess the real color of your hair? can I have my dog back??
One day a father gets out of work and on his way home he suddenly remembers that it?s his daughter?s birthday. He pulls over to a toy Shop and asks the sales person, ?How much for one of those Barbie?s in the display window??
The salesperson answers, ?Which one do you mean, Sir? We have: Work Out Barbie for $19.95, Shopping Barbie for $19.95, Beach Barbie for $19.95, Disco Barbie for $19.95, Ballerina Barbie For $19.95, Astronaut Barbie for $19.95, Skater Barbie for $19.95, and Divorced Barbie for $265.95.?
The amazed father asks: ?It?s what?! Why is the Divorced Barbie $265.95 and the others only $19.95??
The annoyed salesperson rolls her eyes, sighs, and answers: ?Sir?, Divorced Barbie comes with: Ken?s Car, Ken?s House, Ken?s Boat, Ken?s Furniture, Ken?s Computer, one of Ken?s Friends, and a key chain made with Ken?s family jewels.?
Things you dont want to hear in the operating theatre
Better save that. We?ll need it for the autopsy.
Someone call the janitor ? we?re going to need a mop.
?Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness!?
Spot! Spot! Come back with that! Bad Dog!
Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what?s that?
Hand me that?uh?that?uh?..thingie.
Oh no! I just lost my Rolex.
Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?
Damn, there go the lights again?>?You know, there?s big money in kidneys. Heck, the guy?s got two of them.?
Everybody stand back! I lost my contact lens!
Could you stop that thing from beating; it?s throwing my concentration off.
What do you mean he wasn?t in for a s*x change?!
Anyone see where I left that scalpel?
This patient has already had some kids, am I correct?
Nurse, did this patient sign the organ donor card?
Don?t worry; I think it?s sharp enough.
What do you mean ?You want a divorce?!
She?s gonna blow! Everyone take cover!!!
FIRE! FIRE! Everyone get out of here!
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