af 2 Tuesday April 2013

[treetops]

MAE all. Quick check in.
Hi Mick - no I am not in the Midlands - I am in Surrey. Off to Norwich today - some work to do there.
Congrats Cat on 6 months:wow: thats fabuluso. I hope to be joining the 6 month club next week.

Better go - train to catch

[Mick]

af 2 Tuesday April 2013

Morning all...well start of with a big shout to Cat.....................6 months absolutely brilliant well done


::wd::wave:


its a big milestone in the rest of your life so great stuff


Morning TT..off to Norwich today are you ?how are you enjoying the weather over here? bit different from NZ tho Kuya says its raining there too...the rain will be warmer!!!

..And the very person herself..ok ok back to 2013 it is!!! how are you today mate?...guess what ..weighed myself this morning..had to go on the scales 3 times to make sure....11 st 6 couldnt believe it..all ihave got to do is redistribute it all!!!..at the pool today again tody..hows your gyming going?
More still hows the ciggying going? still doing good are you? keep it up mate

Morning Lav...how are you today?hows gs doing?one coffee for you..............which is on the side for anyone else too!forgot to mention itHopefully you want have to replace the whole gang and its just the weather that has sent their egg laying patterns skee wif..have a great day

PPQP...Coffee too madam? and how are you today?Certainly taking to draping your body over this couch havent you? Meant to ask ..how did the Texas hold em go the othr night ? are you now richer or poorer and wiser?:H Any plans for today?

Morning Rabsy..you in yer new hoose yet?

Morning Sl..how are you today? so your daughter has conquered her fear of the dentist with a bribe of getting her ears pierced? take it she is chuffed with the ears..tell me tho ..how are you going to bribe her next time?Have a great day

Hi BHOG and hows you today? take it your are back to normal today...work routine that is..not you personally!! :H

Morning Turn..like the avatar..yep that would have been one seriously good April fool to have played out!! especially if it hadnt shown too much!!Have a good Easter?hope so

Morning YAH..read your post..ermmmm part one deals with sexing hens?and part 2 ..your quote "Ihad a lazy ass day except for work??????......hellooo..what does that mean?either you worked or you didnt!

"Iwon the lottery except that I didnt get the right numbers"

Ihad a lovely breakfast...except that I didnt cook anything

April 1 is over dearie ..move on :H

right all you beautiful people..(said in actor like tones)time to go, so have a great day stay safe,sober and in some cases ....sensible!bye bye luvvies!!!!

What do I know about s*x? I?m a married man.? ?Tom Clancy
?I believe that s*x is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.? ?Steve Martin
?s*x without love is a meaningless experience, but as meaningless experiences go, it?s pretty damned good.? ?Woody Allen
?Having s*x is like playing bridge. If you don?t have a good partner, you?d better have a good hand.? ?Unknown
?My cousin is an agoraphobic homos*xual, which makes it kind of hard for him to come out of the closet.? ?Bill Kelly
?s*x is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation. The other eight are unimportant.? ?Henry Miller
?The Bible contains six admonishments to homos*xuals and 362 admonishments to heteros*xuals. That doesn?t mean that God doesn?t love heteros*xuals. It?s just that they need more supervision.? ?Lynn Lavner
?There are a number of mechanical devices which increase s*xual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.? ?P. J. O?Rourke
?As the French say, there are three s*xes?men, women and clergymen.? ?Rev. Sydney Smith
?Bis*xuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.? ?Woody Allen
?I can remember when the air was clean and s*x was dirty.? ?George Burns
?It isn?t premarital s*x if you have no intention of getting married.? ?Matt Barry
?You know that look women get when they want s*x? Me neither.? ?Drew Carey
?Life is a s*xually transmitted disease.? ?Unknown
?Remember, if you smoke after s*x you?re doing it too fast.? ?Woody Allen
?s*x at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.? ?George Burns
?If it weren?t for pickpockets, I?d have no s*x life at all.? ?Rodney Dangerfield


A police officer pulls over a woman for speeding. Attempting to get out of a ticket the woman gives her best smile and says to the officer, "I thought police officers don't give tickets to beautiful women." The police officer said, "We don't, here's your ticket."

Old Man On A Bench An old man of ninety was sitting on a park bench crying. A policeman noticed this and asked him why he was crying."Well," says the old fellow, "I just got married to a twenty-five year old woman. Every morning she makes me a wonderful breakfast, and we have then have fun together laughing and relaxing. In the afternoon she makes me a wonderful lunch and then we make fun together laughing and relaxing again. At dinner time she makes me a wonderful supper and then we relax more and enjoy ourselves."The policeman looks at the old man and says, "You shouldn't be crying! You should be the happiest man in the world!"So the old man says, "I know! I'm crying because I don't remember where I live!"

redneck 70th anniversary poem:
roses are red violets are blue i want you to know that i have to poo! our love expands over land and sea. i have a question, will you please wipe me? my back hurts and i cant reach around, if you do this ill take you to town! you think im crazy and that im a nut but i want to thank you for wiping my butt!!!

You might be a redneck if your house still has the "WIDE LOAD" sign still on it.

"How can I ever thank you?" gushed a woman to Clarence Darrow, after he had solved her legal troubles."My dear woman," Darrow replied, "ever since the Phoenicians invented money there has been only one answer to that question."

When a person assists a criminal in breaking the law before the criminal gets arrested, we call him an accomplice.When a person assists a criminal in breaking the law after the criminal gets arrested, we call him a defense lawyer.

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman were without tickets for the opening ceremonies of the summer Olympics but hoped to be able to talk their way in at the gate. Security was very tight, however, and each of their attempts was met with a stern refusal.While wandering around outside the stadium, the Englishman came upon construction site, which gave him an idea. Grabbing a length of scaffolding, he presented himself at the gate and said, "Johnson, the pole vault," and was admitted.The Scotsman, overhearing this, went at once to search the site. When he came up with a sledge hammer, he presented himself at the gate and said, "McTavish, the hammer." He was also admitted.The Irishman combed the site for an hour and was nearly ready to give up when he spotted his ticket in. Seizing a roll of barbed wire, he presented himself at the gate and announced, "O'Sullivan, fencing."

Mrs. Dugan and Mrs. Riley were talking one day about Mr. Riley and his constant drinking. Mrs. Dugan said, "I have an idea about how to stop him from spending so much time at the pub. Every night he comes home through the cemetery. One night you should get disguised and spook him when he comes staggering through." So Mrs. Riley waited in the cemetery one night until she heard her husband coming. She jumped up and a startled Riley said, "Who are you??" Mrs. Riley replied, "I am the devil!" With that, Riley shook her hand and said, "Glad to meet ya, I'm married to your sister."

"I'm not saying that the customer service in my bank is bad, but when I went in the other day and asked the clerk to check my balance ... she leaned over and pushed me."

A wealthy investor walked into a bank and said to the bank manager, "I would like to speak with Mr. Reginald Jones, who I understand is a tried and trusted employee of yours."The banker said, "Yes he certainly was trusted. And he will be tried as soon as we catch him."

here is a list of excuses for not going to work..feel free to use/adapt any of them

And?
No excuse necessary - I was pregnant at the time

Got Pulled Over
Say a cop pulled me over and towed my car and I got lost. Well, I was kicking rocks. I hit a guy in the eye and I had to carry him to the doctors and I left my phone at home and I left my keys in the car.

Crime witness
Witnessed a crime or accident and was taken by the authorities to give testimony.

Best excuse ever... needed evidence
I woke up one morning for work and followed my daily routine: took out my beautiful snake, and sat down at my computer with a bowl of cereal on the table and the snake in my lap. While reading an absorbing email, she happened to slip out of my lap, up on to the table... and was halfway inside my printer before I realized where she was going! I had to call in to work to say I was going to be late because I had to extract my snake from my printer. My boss said I had 2 minutes to text him a picture of the snake in the printer or I was fired. I took the picture, sent it, and got to keep my job. It took me over 2 hours to get her out, but it was the funniest reason I've ever had to miss work.

Admin Assistant
Took my children by the store before work, tried to take a short cut and "got stuck on the ice". Could not go forward or backwards. Boss said, Good one, he is keeping a list and going to publish a book.

If you live where is snows
The snow plow broke down in front of my driveway and I can't get out to come to work. I they move it in time I'll be in. But of course when you go in the next day, you say it was there all day long.

Coastguard Volunteer
Well this only works if you live near the sea, but I really did tell my boss I was a volunteer for the coastguard so i had beeper and would beep myself with an "emergency" everytime i got bored at work. After a while he said he just couldnt employ a coastguard volunteer because of the regular absence but he told me I was good person doing the right thing and he told me how "we need more people like you in this country" (this elaborate lie went on for 4months

My brother and his wife had a baby
I had a first-time lunch meeting with a new client that I tried for 3 years to get a face-to-face meeting set-up. I slept thru my alarm. I called him up 10 minutes prior to the meeting and told him the honest truth, "I overslept my alarm... my wife and I were at the hospital with my brother and his wife from 1am to 8am to experience the birth of their first child... I got home and decided to sleep for a few hours before our meeting and honestly just woke up... I live an hour away so I will never be there on time... hope we can reschedule for later in the week.".



Colonoscopy
When I really need a day, this is my favorite excuse...I am taking my Mother for a Colonoscopy. No one want to talk about THAT and I look like a wonderful daughter. It works every time

Insomnia
Had a guy who was "catching up on some sleep after dealing with a bout of insomnia the past couple of days". Well thank goodness that's all he needed.




Car Stuck in Garage
An employee called in to say her electric power went out so she couldn't get the car out of the garage.


Don't Pay the Ransom....
Run into the boss' office and yell, "Don't pay the ransom, I escaped!"

[learningtolovewinter]

af 2 Tuesday April 2013

Just checking in- didn't make it to the gym as I got up to late. It is okay, I will do one of those workout videos now. Truth be told I let the doggies dilly dally on their walk as it is 32 degrees F and I have to ride my bike to the gym. How do these Dutch folks get on their bikes all winter long??? Omg. I just couldn't do it this morning. I will force myself to go for a ride once it warms up a bit. Exercise is really important for me to feel balanced. Okay. Julian Michaels here I come....

Best AF Tuesday to all.... gosh this really is an inspiring thread. Very positive and so good to see people realizing their goals. It just means this is all possible! The way I feel today I have no interest in drinking, but it won't last I know. Gotta keep working at it.

[kuya]

af 2 Tuesday April 2013

MAE.......Winter .....don't say it won't last .......it did for me and lots of folk......there is no reason for you to assume anything.....this is YOUR quit !

So how you enjoying Engerland TT ? I wish I could afford a short visit but too expensive and too far.

Mick .... Well done you on the weight......I have been slack the last few days so I doubt I have shifted any. Ciggie quit OK.....funny though I don't get the same joy that I got from being sober and I don't feel particularly energised.......truth is I am bored with it cos I expected to feel bigger and better. I won't smoke but I need to push myself physically to see the improvement in fitness or something. And the chocolate craving is driving me nuts ... I don't even like chocolate that much

Congrats again Cat.......feels really real at six months doesn't it?

[Lavande]

af 2 Tuesday April 2013

Good morning Abbers!

Below freezing here again this morning ~ where is Spring?
A month from now the heatwaves will be here, so strange......

Greetings TT, Mick, LTLW, Kuya & PQ

Congrats on the weight loss Mick! I still wouldn't mind seeing another 10 lbs disappear myself! I'm not driving myself crazy over it though. Not like I have anyone around to impress anyway :H

Looks like today will pretty much be a repeat of yesterday - almost like seeing into the future
Have a terrific AF Tuesday everyone.

Lav

[porqoui]

af 2 Tuesday April 2013

MAE ALL....

TT...thanks for the quick kickoff. Hope the work is fruitfull.

Mick...thanks for the coffee. Well done on the weight loss. No couch lounging today, back to normal routine. My phone has been pinging all weekend with work emails which I must now deal with. No big win at the tourney this year. Came in 7th with no re-buys so held my own for awhile.

KY...hang in there with the no ciggy's. Was curious how long it's been now. Would be interesting to compare with the AF days. I know at one point I felt like I had hit a plataeu and nothing was changing. I'm not a big chocolate fan either, but boy did I crave the sugar after giving up the AL.

Lav...enjoy your day. Sounds like things are pretty much back to normal routine for you.

Forecast for today is 17C (63F) and snow on Friday. Will definetly have to spend some time outside today. Off for my second cuppa and joke reading. Have a great AF Tuesday all and all to come....PPQP

[BHOG]

af 2 Tuesday April 2013

Good Tuesday morning to all!
Not much to tell here, work is not good today (technology isssues due to management trying to fixa problem that doesn't exist).
But I'm sober, so I can bit*h intelligently.

[Catbuddy]

af 2 Tuesday April 2013

Mae, everyone.

It's great to be home - four days away is a long time for both my son and me. I left my computer behind, so I couldn't post much, and I really missed it.

Thank you everyone for your praise and encouragement. I'm so happy about this. It really is something to be proud of, you know! As an aside, I forgot my L-glut on my trip, and went through deep sugar cravings and blood sugar swings. Though there was AL all around at the ski resort and our condo, I didn't feel a strong draw, but boy was I tempted by the Easter chocolate and I was HUNGRY the whole time. I really think I'll be taking L-glut for the long haul. Thank God for it. I don't think the last six months would have been successful without it.

Congrats Mick on that weight loss! LTLW, I use workout tapes all the time! And as my tag line implies, I'm a Jillian Michaels fan, too. I think Lav has a great thing going at Curves. I believe exercise is right up there with L-glut for keeping me from overeating.

Nurdl, it's so good to have you back! You've been busy. Please stay awhile.

Kuya, TT, BHOG, SL, and anyone I missed, have a great Tuesday!

Cat

[learningtolovewinter]

af 2 Tuesday April 2013

Another day AF- bedtime. Today I didn't think about wine- must keep up my guard though. And I made it to the gym tonight- so 2 workouts today & body feels better than last night.

[scottish lass]

af 2 Tuesday April 2013

Hi all - sunny day and I am happy, left the office a bit early as girls off school - and oh heck yes, my mind immediately went there! Sunny days are definatley a trigger as is a holdiay feeling - no homework shouting, no stress to go to bed as no need for the bed bugs to get to bed early - so many silly excuses to indulge - trying to make the great reasons not to outshout these silly excuses - wouldn't I like to feel this good tomorrow??? Well, heck I won't feel like this if I drink now will i???
Yup, girl is happy with her ears....not sure what next bribe will be Mick, she is getting older so there are many options..notthing quite so big though - the eldest got blue streaks in her hair when she kept her grades up, so it will likely be something along those lines - the bribery (prefer reward:H:H - makes me feel better as a parent:H) works for me!
Intellegent bit*hing rocks indeed BHOG!
Still craving (and eating) the sweets Cat - maybe I shoudl give L Glut a go again - how do you take it? and what brand???? I am doing ok on the diet, but would do a lot better without chocolate!
KY and PPQP - we coudl have a choccie party:l
Howdy TT, Lav and LTLW.....