AF Tuesday, 14 May

[learningtolovewinter]

Coffee anyone?
Up early & off to the gym. Tired but clear headed.
Yesterday was my cousin's birthday, the one who recently died. Just realized it, strange how she kept coming to mind yesterday.

[bear73]

AF Tuesday, 14 May

morning winter - up and off to work in a bit - big coffee here too on day 3!
I feel very anxious at the moment comparing myself with others negatively,looking on the darkside, expecting the worst.

I am not proud of this but need to be honest. I am envious of friends who have lost weight,envious of people in my skate team who seem to be progressing, but one of them is unbearably smug which makes it harder. I also feel like I am getting the cold shoulder from someone I really like in the team at the moment.I'm also worrying about an old friendship that seems to be going a bit wrong/person seems very overly critical of me. I feel like a bitter old woman/jealous 16 year old!

I know I have a lot to be grateful for and also can use the envy to push myself forward/show me what I would like to achieve. It just is hard.

Reading about nutrition and supplements book by patrick holford called 'how to quit without feeling shit' - does anyone else take supplements?May help my slightly rubbish mood right now - maybe some of it is also coming to terms with fact I am accepting I can't drink more than I usually do so I am mourning loss of old life?who knows - anyway - sorry for the word vomiting - have a good day y'all.Off to count my blessings/good things in my life.

[Mick]

AF Tuesday, 14 May

MAE everyone....hi ltlw, thanks for startin the thread...extra 10 mins in bed for me ..ta..so how is everyone today?yep an Ill have a cuppa too eeeh looxoory!!!
just about to let the rabbits out....its sunny,windy and yep just started raining,you know that fine stuff that gets you wet.:H

right on with the show...
Morning ltlw how are you today? ta for the brew...enjoy yourself at the gym..was at the pool yesterday....73 lengths, got a bit of work to do today, but probably go later on.So hows life without the numpty neighbours?

Morning bear ..how are you? whereabouts in uk are you? well done on your day 3....be positive ..lot of negativity there..focus all the angst and envy into quitting drinking...just focus on one thing at the mo, seems you are spreading the butter too thin...quitting drinking, envious of your friends losing weight, better skaters etc...as for the friendship..if you think( and that just may be it) why not front your friend up and ask him/her if there is a problem that you feel etc...
My opinion ,and thats all it is, is the fact you are letting all these wee things and I bet there are more, build up to create a massive problem in your eyes that you cant deal with and try to shy away from with booze..I know...I did the same!!deal with the issues singularily and its easier...lecture over have a great day!

Evening TT ..how are you? been cooking in your new oven again..or been to work :H.Did you enjoy your day of meetings?..and more to the point were they productive for the amount of time/energy used? I used to find mine not so...but hey thats the judicial system over here for you..takes a million years to implement a policy and by the time it is in the policy lead has gone complete with all the answers so the status quo remains!!you have a great evening

morning Cinders,how are you today?Chinese buffet yum yum my favourite..whenever we go into Manchester to the theatre, there is always a Chinese buffet involved in the day somewhere down in Chinatown..its only 8am and the thought of salt and pepper ribs n wings ..mmmmm Best of luck with your hubbys tests and surgery.Mine has been rehashed.Was supposed to get op on Thursday ,but now been informed got to go Friday for assessment and possibly needle treatment..then rest up for 2 days.If that doesnt work then the old chop op to see if they can free the nerves.we shall see..anyway have a good day.

Mornin ppqp hows you today?If you arent using that soil I could do with it ...planning the front garden now and it needs a bit if soil to do it!!Yep got the outlaws to the airport ok..phew cant really mess that one up!!Im havin a 2nd brew now..want one?could do with some of that sunshine if you have any spare!! have a great day

morning Lav...hows you today? brew for you too?So you ended up doing all the work the other day?take it you are out with the mulch pile today? cmon lets get it shifted Roughly worked out what I am going to do with the front garden border once I have finished ? doing the back..think I am going to need a ton of soil and also a ton of 20 mm golden stone and to "find " some more big rocks.Watched that programme last night again..breaking Amish its called...2 Amish girls,2 boys an a Menonite girl in New York..boy they havent got a clue about life as we know it..which in some ways is good but in others uh huh..prefer my own life ..it gives me the choice..nuff yakking from me I ve got work to get into! have a good day

Hiya SL...hows you today?yep you have done well to get this far so keep it up...just dont have the regressive sod it moments and you will be top of the pops!!!Yep not into meds either...though unfortunately I have to ..otherwise I will end up as the monty python dead parrot sketch!!!:H but certainly dont take them if I dont have to.

Hiya Kuya ..see how easily that rolls off the tongue? hows you today? had a good day today?busy? hows the no smoking campaign going?Take it with the early start you were at it all day..get some chill time in :l take it easy

thats it from me folks ...shoows over, so see yall tomorrow have a great day /evening

Q: What do a jackknifed semi in Ohio, a guy getting a divorce in Alabama, and a tornado in Kansas have in common?
A: They?re all fixin? to lose a trailer

A hot coed visits a doctor for a physical. After the checkup the doctor says, ?Everything looks fine, but why is an M imprinted on your stomach??

?My boyfriend goes to Michigan,? she replies. ?He loves his school so much that he wears his varsity jacket during sex.?

The next day a different coed visits the same doctor, and she also has an M on her stomach.

?Let me guess,? says the doctor, ?your boyfriend goes to Michigan.?

?No, but my girlfriend?s at Wisconsin.?

A woman invited some people to dinner.
At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said,
"Would you like to say the blessing?" she said.
"I wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied.
"Just say what you hear mommy say," the woman answered.
The daughter bowed her head and said,
"Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?".


A woman called her doctor to complain about her husband's snoring.
"Is there anything you can do?" she said,"Well, there is one operation
that will cure your husband, but it's rather expensive.
$1,000 plus $450 a month for 36 months."
"OH MY GOSH!!!!" exclaimed the woman, "that's like leasing a sports car!"
"Hmm," the doctor murmured. "Too obvious, eh?".


ben's dad was building a pine bookcase, and ben was watching and occasionally helping.
"what are the holes for?" ben asked.
"they're knot holes", said his dad.
"what are they, then, if they're not holes?" said ben.


Where do geologists go for entertainment?
to rock concerts.


why is a classroom like an old car?
cuz it full of nuts, and has a crank at the
front.


did you hear about the florist who had
two kids?
one's a budding gunius and the other's
a blooming idiot.


whats a snail?
a slug with a crash helmet.


what did the dumb ghost name his pet tiger?
spot.


how did the police scare the bugs away?
they called for the S.W.A.T. team.


what crawls and wears uniforms and helmets?
army ants.


why was the firefly flashing on and off?
his light was on the blink.

A couple had two little boys ages 8 and 10, who were EXTREMLY mischievous. They were always getting into trouble and their parents knew that if any mischief occurred in their town, their sons would get the blame.
The boys' mother heard that a clergyman in town had been successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he would speak
with her boys. The clergyman agreed, and asked to see them individually.
So, the mother sent her 8-year-old first, in the morning, with the older boy to see the clergyman in the afternoon.
The clergyman, a huge man with a booming voice, sat the younger boy down and asked him sternly, "Where is God?" They boy's mouth dropped open, but he made no response, sitting there with his mouth hanging open.
The clergyman repeated the question. "Where is God?" Again, the boy
made no attempt to answer. So the clergyman raised his voice some more and
shook his finger in the boy's face and bellowed. "Where is God!?" >The boy screamed and bolted from the room. He ran directly home and dove
into his closet, slamming the door behind him. When his older brother found him
in the closet, he asked, "What happened?" The younger brother, gasping for breath, replied, "We are in big trouble this time! God is missing and they think we did it!".


There was a farmer who grew watermelons. He was doing pretty well,
but he was disturbed by some local kids who would sneak into his water
melon patch at night and eat his watermelons. After some careful thought,
he came up with a clever idea that he thought would scare the kids away for sure.
He made up a sign and posted it in the field. The next day,
the kids show up and they saw the sign which read,
"Warning! One of the watermelons in this field has been injected with cyanide."
The kids ran off, made up their own sign and posted it next to the farmer's sign.
When the farmer returned, he surveyed the field. He noticed that no watermelons
are missing, but the sign next to his read, "Now there are two!!!".

[treetops]

AF Tuesday, 14 May

MAE - this definitely has to be a quick dash as I must get some serious work reading done. Worked at home today - but also made ginger crunch and enchiladas in my new oven.

Bear - take Mick's advice and channel that anger and frustration at the booze. At alcohol/liquor/ethanol...think of all the kinds of booze there are and how they are packaged - but whats it about? look at the ads and think about what is really there at the crux of the beautiful candle-light dinners etc - the ads are not selling romance - they are selling ethanol that rots the liver and fogs the mind and can make beautiful people like you and me into bumbling idiots.
Imagine a plastic bladder of wine (the inside of a box of really cheap wine) served up on a silver tray...how sexy and enticing....

In other words - know the real enemy and make an all out war on it. Its poison. I hope Kuya comes along to lend some fire here - she's great on this stuff!!!!
Read Allen Carr's book if you haven't. also Jason Vale (who I think plagiarises Carr but who knows).
Or recognise the booze as The Beast - seductive, plays words with you, tricks you (thats from Jack Trimpey, Rational Recovery). Well you can talk back and outsmart The Beast because you are a human who has learned to think.

Thats my advice - and what I did for several months. I still have that anger but I think now its more indifference - can't be tossed with alcohol any more. But I am not going to play with it. Others can, and some can play the game safely. But we can't.

Take care all!!!

[learningtolovewinter]

AF Tuesday, 14 May

Life is much better, I am less like some sort of on the edge crackhead.
(never done drugs my the way). Just sayin' that all that racket upstairs was making me really nervous and jumpy.

We are no longer 'hoping for the best.' Poor husband has to deal with a lot of crap, getting things in order, but if we do not take action selling this place will be tough. New 'house rules,' more meetings with the other owners, and seeing an attorney about how to deal with the owner upstairs who lives abroad.

I am hitting the street and looking at apartments, townhouses, houses.... etc... whatever I can find. I, naturally, want to spend a sensible amount of money. Tricky business. Oh, and of course we have a laundry list of wishes, which we are quickly modifying. It is really not good that we are forced into doing this sooner versus later, but we are going to deal with it.

As for as the wine goes I am pretty okay for a few days. I have a big box of valerian tea I drink pretty much all the time in hopes that if something comes up I won't bounce off the ceiling.

Best to everyone for an AF day.

[kuya]

AF Tuesday, 14 May

MAE Abbers.......early(ish) night for me as I am bloody knackered.

LTLW.....I hope things settle down properly soon, you need peace and to focus on the job at hand.

Bear.....do you think you may be displacing anxiety about quitting onto these other things? LOLAB,who posts on Newbies, said that she used to create drama to justify drinking, and I think it is true of all of us early on.

Let none of us lose sight of why we are here. We contribute to an abstainance thread on an online forum specifically for people with alcohol problems.

Some come to moderate and one or two succeed.

The rest of us are alcoholics, we CANNOT control our drinking and drink at levels that can shorten and/or ruin our lives. That is why we know we MUST abstain.

Getting and staying sober is why we are here and to get sober everything else has to be put aside. We are fighting for our lives.

[Lavande]

AF Tuesday, 14 May

Good morning Abbers!

Thanks for the coffee, I am on my second cup already
Spring has temporarily disappeared, the temp is just a few degrees above freezing. I'm afraid the mulch pile will continue to sit & wait for me. I have a lot of work to get through before my grandsons arrive this afternoon, busy!!!

Mick, you do know that show about the Amish is all fake, right?
The real Amish around here are barely able to speak English let alone do any acting :H
I have see that show a few times, it is 'entertaining'. I hope you get relief from your assessment & treatment & can avoid surgery if at all possible

bear, I'm hearing the same things you talked about a few years ago. If you really want to make progress you have to change your thinking. I really found the hypno CDs to be very helpful! The hardest part for me was just taking that leap of faith into believing that everything would be better without AL. I only wish I had done it sooner

Greetings TT, Kuya, PQ, , SL, SF, LTLW & everyone stopping by today!
Wishing everyone a wonderful AF Tuesday!

Lav

[learningtolovewinter]

AF Tuesday, 14 May

I was just thinking that I need to post a solid reason everyday why I don't want to drink.
Might keep my little brain on track?

Today: Drinking makes small problems into big ones.

[Cinders]

AF Tuesday, 14 May

Today is a wonderful day to be sober!!

I have many items on my "honey do" list that I wish to accomplish, the sun is out and I want to enjoy it and I look forward to spending time this evening with my husband cuddled in bed and chatting.

If I take a drink, none of that will happen.

Hi to all, I don't have time to read everyone's posts but hope all have a wonderful AF day. I am grateful for the chance to do the enjoyable things in life and enjoy them. I hope the same for all my AF friends here.

Love,
Cindi

[bear73]

AF Tuesday, 14 May

thanks everyone for your input - I feel much more content this evening and less anxious.

Mick - I live in Berkshire but come from Manchester originally. I do think I am displacing some anxiety around drinking and creating drama. I think the envy points to what I want to achieve in my own life - so I want to use it for a positive.

Treetops/Lav/Kuya - I am working on challenging thinking - read some Jack Trimpey through reading SMART message boards.I really like the rational recovery approach. Have just got Jason Vale book on kindle - very very similar to allan carr book - but if it works. Think I may well buy the supplements recommended in the patrick holford book.

Have a lovely evening everyone.

[porqoui]

AF Tuesday, 14 May

MAE ALL...late check in here.

LTLW...thanks for the coffee and the kickoff. Yup, the brain works in mysterious ways. Good plan to post a reason for not drinking everyday and I love the one you chose for today. Will be watching for tomorrows.

Bear...:l it is hard! Being honest and posting your thoughts is brave, and I am proud of you for having the courage. The more you get it out there posting, journaling, sharing etc. the more you can let go. And believe me, I had a lot to let go. Hang in there, we're here. Glad you're feeling less anxious this evening, anxiety played a real number on me but it too passed. I just love it when people find positives in their lives.

Mick...doing great today, thanks for asking. Good job on airport trip and as far as the soil, people are coming out of the woodwork asking what we're doing with the left overs. Answer, it's going into the "in ground" plots.

TT...good advice to Bear and the rest of us. Yup we can talk back and outsmart the beast. Hope you're taking some "me" time.

KY...getting and staying sober is why I'm here and it seems to be working so far. Hope you're getting a peaceful, energizing sleep. See in my tomorrow.

Lav...hope you got all your work done before the g/kids got there. Was going to rib you about your mulch pile but some of my soil pile is still there, so will wait till I've finished.

Cinders...do you write your own "honey do" lists? Sounds like you've got a great plan in place, cuddles and chatting with hubbie tops AL anytime.

Well...it appears I'm in court tomorrow morning and hopefully the POA situation will be dealt with. See you all on the flipside....PPQP

[learningtolovewinter]

AF Tuesday, 14 May

Hoi- quick post to say I did just fine today.
I think the L- glut is helping, just got some good advice & will hit the health food store tomorrow. Want to focus on calming my racing thoughts.
Lots going on... Hope everyone is managing ok tonight!

[kuya]

AF Tuesday, 14 May

Bear......get supplements! I cannot stress enough how helpful they are. People manage without and once you are sober for a period you don't need them BUT to keep struggling when help is available makes no sense.

Multivitamin , vit B, L glutamine, GABA ( unles prone to seizures) inisitol.

These things help to replace the building blocks destroyed by drinking and to bypass the pathways damaged by drinking.
In the early days good diet is insufficient alone since we have damaged our body's ability to absorb nutrients.

Our bodies are complex machines that we have been running on the wrong fuel for a long time, it needs a lot of extra to repair the damage.

[scottish lass]

AF Tuesday, 14 May

Checking in to say hello - crazy meeting day today (yeah one of those:upset - last meeting in San Fran 6-9pm, then a couple hours drive home, just to get up and start over again!!! Wish I didn't need the money!
Well, at least not much opportunity for the drink (excpet after the evening meeting when the bar will be next stop - i will be so ready to get home, it won't be a problem).
Mick - so right - once the "regressive sod it moments" go, I will be well on the mend - good grief, not sure about "top of the pops"! Loved that show when I was young - it was a regular Thursday watch for our family.
Hey Cinders - Honey do list is a list of jobs for your honey to do, not you!!!!! Enjoy your cuddling - i am jealous :l
PPQP - good wishes for a conclusion tomorrow - I really hope you get this worked out
Bear and LTLW - hang in there guys and keep moving forward, I know we can do this, just like those who are here that have managed to reach the places we aspire to....
"See" you tomorrow....MAE all, :l

[TheSunFlower]

AF Tuesday, 14 May

Just checking in. Things are going great. Inner Journey....it is personal and I do not care to elaborate....still sober....seeing why I drank. For me....it so much more than addiction.