October AA Thread

[caysea]

October AA Thread

Hi All

Congrats. Betty!!!! The 1 year is a big day. I am sure it seemed so impossible at the start. Congrats on finding your way out.


Stay Healthy and Keep Fighting
AF. 5-16-08

[Determinator]

October AA Thread

yay Betty! so damn pleased for you. you win the highly coveted 'golden pumpkin award'

Pumpkin 'Hijinks' F1 - 2011 AAS Vegetable Award Winner

Caysea, good to see you matey

sober hugs from a hotel in NorCal xxxxxx

[bettygirl]

October AA Thread

mmmm punkins!

im waving at you from Washington, det! im gonna go watch that link right now!

caysea! good to see you! it was a bit daunting, but I was so ready!!! I really let go and just went for it in aa...it has worked so far when for sooooo long, nothing did! I have been at mwo for years (under the name peacenik before), and although I made it 7 months in 2007, I didn't have any face to face contact with others who really got what I was going through...with mwo and aa, I have made more progress and feel like I can sustain this lifestyle forever, one day at a time

ive got a lovely lentil stew on the stove, and some fresh turmeric to experiment with (I ate some raw today...my teeth were orange for hours, and my tongue still is! tastes like a carrot times 100...not too bad and sooo good for us!).

peace!

[Determinator]

October AA Thread

turmeric rocks! I buy it in bulk. you can make a tea with it too. they drink that in Okinawa.

[retteacher]

October AA Thread

BG: Congratulations on your one year. Let us know how it was to receive your coin. There's nothing quite like getting a year under your belt & receiving that recognition. Take care of yourself. Mary

[TheSunFlower]

October AA Thread

Thinking about going back to AA. I like my CR group, but some Wednesday nights are just not manageable. My issue in AA was that I had a tough time finding sane women. The ones that were only came by once in awhile.

I like the mixed meetings even though they were mostly men. I got good stuff from there. Never faired well in women's meetings. The last one I went to I was a few days sober and they asked me to dinner. Dinner was in the bar area....I did not make it another 24 hours after that. Now with more time under my belt....I can understand how sitting in the bar did not affect them.

Anyways....I am thinking I will mix in the 1pm that meets every day from time to time. Great group of men and I enjoyed their topics. This way I can free up a Wednesday evening when my kids have homework and I need to be home with them. CR has childcare, so it was easy to take them with me during the summer. Now that school is back in....its not that easy.

[retteacher]

October AA Thread

SF: What is CR?

You're so right about men far outnumbering women in AA. It's hard as heck for a woman w/quite a bit of program to find a sponsor. And yes, there are definitely some unstable women (& men). We're just getting off alcohol, so we're bound to be a little nuts. I keep going to different meetings which puts me in contact w/people w/good program.

Good luck.

Mary

[chrysa]

October AA Thread

Also, if there is a problem simmering in your life, it's probably a good idea to unburden yourself of it. fr Mary

Congratulations to everyone on their 1 yr anniversaries or any anniversary. I just watched the Robin Williams segment on JonStewart. Very sobering

I did something really stupid. I feel sick about it. I have been playing with the fact that I can drink 1/2 or even 1 bottle of white in the evening after work. It doesn't seem to affect me-- I think in mystupid mind -- esp I do not go out and get anymore.

Well, last night I felt very relaxed & had accomplished a lot at work and I knew I was working at home today so could sleep i n a bit. I did something really stupid ...about 11:30PM I decided to go out. Thought I would get some more wine. I went to a coffee bar - espresso. They also serve wine. I had an espresso and a glass of wine.


If that wasn't stupid enough I texted my daughter & told her where I was and was drinking espresso and a glass of wine.

The point is I have never done such a thing in my life. I could have had an accident & it would have been a DUI. A dozen bad things could have happened. I really can't believe I did this. It was like Robin Williams describing the "lower power"...

And I texted my daughter!!! It is astounding what alcohol does to the brain. I am sick over the whole thing. I remember her saying to me that what worries her the most is that she doesn't know what my bottom could be. This is what rings in my ears.

The thing is --- I think this proves that I cannot have just one drink or a few white wines, ...I may not become a fall down drunk but I do really stupid shit!!!

In addition if I drank and was depressed I could think of killing myself and just might try it ! why? because I am a stupid drunk. Perhaps that is my label for myself...a stupid drunk.

I do really stupid things like think I will have fun...like Robin & Jon Stewart talked about

Anyway...Mary ..you very kindly gave the invitation to unburden ourselves..so I did..

Someone else here said the best thing is that the guilt,remorse,self-deprecation goes away when we have sobriety.....I look forward to that..cause I feel real sick inside at the moment...

[retteacher]

October AA Thread

chrysa: What happened to you has happened to many of us. The thinking that started you off is called "stinkin' thinkin'" in AA. It's also called alcoholic thinking. The summer of 2012 I got into that kind of thinking:
-"I've been sober so long, I think I can now drink normally."
-"I was never as bad as ___________(fill in the blank)."
-"I'll only have one."
-"I'll only have a little in order to fall asleep."
-etc.

That's why the disease of alcoholism is described as cunning, baffling, & powerful. It blindsides a person. I had to admit that, even though I'm not homeless & haven't lost everything, that I'm still an alcoholic. I cannot take one drink wo/wanting more & more. I cannot drink safely. It's as simple as that for me.

Chrysa, pick yourself up & dust yourself off & get back on the beam. You can do it. By the way, I found that I could not stay sober wo/AA in my life. Even w/AA, I slipped last year. It's a powerful disease, & I need all the help I can get.

Always, always come here w/a problem. You don't have to go to meetings to read/share here.

Good luck.
Mary

[gettinitright]

October AA Thread

First day AF in 6 weeks. I have quit before and I will again. Tired of being sick and tired. Shakey, sweaty, pretty painful day to be honest, but upward and onward I go.

[retteacher]

October AA Thread

getting: Of course you can stay sober. Never forget today...how sick, shaky, sweaty etc. you feel. Never romanticize alcohol. It's not your friend. Whenever I get those bad thoughts of how I might be able to drink safely, I try to remember my last drunk. It was disgusting & humiliating.

I couldn't be more grateful for my sobriety. I love getting up in the morning feeling good. I haven't thrown up in a long, long time & am amazed that it was once a daily occurance that I took for granted. I don't walk around w/a headache or gastro-intestinal problems.

Take care of yourself. Mary

[Just Another Recovering D]

October AA Thread

Hello all, I'm new here but, gee, I sure do enjoy the reading. I think I had heard that Robin Williams was one of us, but I didn't know about his relapse story. I have heard similar stories numerous times, but hearing his brought the potential risk back to front-and-center in my mind. I've got a little over two and a half years and I'm forever thinking that I got this thing licked. What a fool! Hey, quick question: I've recently taken on a sponsee who takes Melatonin to enhance sleep; wants to know my take on it. It seems pretty harmless but I'm thinking it's a "mood-alterer" which of course is a red flag. Me, I would never risk it, but my new friend is a bit unaccepting at this point. Any thoughts??? Thanks. Like the thread! Mark

[TheSunFlower]

October AA Thread

Mary,

CR is Celebrate Recovery. It is church based and does follow the 12 Steps. Certainly not for everyone, but it did help me.

Everyone...have a great AF day!

[retteacher]

October AA Thread

Recovering D: I think melatonin would be considered OK. I'm not a purist about meds. I know sober people that have to take them: anti-d's, anxiety meds, pain meds, etc. As long as it's not to get a buzz, I think it's OK. I've tried melatonin, as I'm a terrible sleeper, but it didn't work for me. It did nothing to alter my mood. Now, I just accept that I might not get a full night's sleep once in a while. I do have a friend that smokes pot. I think that is definitely not OK. I've met people who have readjusted their sobriety dates when they've finally given it up. I've sometimes heard it called "marijuana maintenance." That is not OK as far as I'm concerned. Mary

[retteacher]

October AA Thread

Everyone: I just got back from a very moving speaker meeting. The speaker really spoke from the heart, & though his story is different from mine, I could really identify w/the drinking to quell the fears I walked around with. A good meeting. I'm so glad I went. mary