Ladies on a Mission Week 3

[available]

Ladies on a Mission Week 3

God i lost it again. Gees you think i would have learnt and listened to how to post without losing it.

Been a trying day but home in my nest. Have pea and ham soup on and a load of washing and made a coffee. No AL in site.

Jvo loved your 2 posts though i only read the one. Being anal is good, i used to be when the 4 children were growing up but now i am pretty unorganised but i seem to manage. At work i am definitely organised and like you at home, yep do the minimal but always kind of clean.

Humbe you dont need luck, you will be fine. Say you are on antibiotics or something. Excuses are always good at the moment. Its just a desire to be sociable.

SL desires are better than cravings I think, they go away quicker when we slap ourselves around the head. The cravings are shocking and harder to settle that AL brain down. I have had a few desires this week when things got tough but just said NO. I am not giving in I am here for the long haul and thank god for here.

Nar I will never bitch again about the cold if you are in -27 temps. I complain at -3. Brrr is all i can say and i bet you thank god for central heating. I'm glad you dont drink and I dont drink either.

Pav my boss is an arse what can i say. I tolerate him and i love my job but i wont be treated like shit by anyone. I will go along my merry way like I always do. Like you Pav i have been a lunatic posting but Day 6 and i am sure all the lovely ladies understand.

I have plans for a stress free weekend doing some cleaning and walking to clear the head but i am so tired from work that may end up in watching dvd's and relaxing.

[patrice]

Ladies on a Mission Week 3

All great here, enjoying the start of the weekend AF
Hi Everyone...
Well I'm also an English language/Literature teacher... now this is getting Spooky!!!
xx
Take care
Patrice

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission Week 3

Morning beautiful ladies!
Well my daily weather report from Calgary, Canada is -28C/-30C, wind chill -39C. Today is the coldest is should get this round and then will warm up tomorrow. I walked to work this am and wore my ski pants, down vest, down coat, sweater, turtleneck, winter boots, and mitts. SO I was toasty warm. Except my face got a bit cold. lol! Whateva.

OMG, all these teachers(J-Vo, Humble, Patrice) and a couple of nurses(Avail, SL) too! That is kind of wierd, no? Well, it is good you will have something in common. I know both these professions can be highly stressful. My job is stressful at times too. I am a buyer and we are always being pushed to meet deadlines etc. And the people I work with can be very difficult to deal with, of course.

Great for you gals giving up smoking. Thats another addiction which really sucks. K9 and J-Vo, good luck! I actually smoked until I was 25 then just quit.

Had a fight with hubby this am. He walked to work without me and left me to walk alone. We have been married for 23 years and sometimes it is so difficult. I would just like to friggen kick him in the nu..s. Really, grow up Husband!
But, you know, I have no desire to drink.

Hey Pav- make sure you are vigilant this weekend and the next. I know you are still feeling the effects of your last episode but as soon as that bad feeling wears off you may decide its ok to have 'one'. We NEVER have Just ONE!! Just be grateful you are sober. Drinking AL sucks for us. We would not be talking on this website if we could drink AL.

Love y'all, back to work.

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission Week 3

First of all, I can't express how much you ladies on a mission mean to me. I've never felt so good about coming to MWO and felt the support that I do from this thread. We are in this together and you know what they say about strength in numbers. So I'm grateful to you gals!

My excuse to people for not drinking, and it did come up once, is that AL triggers my hot flashes. Yep. That shuts people up.

Busy weekend coming up, and I'm grateful for that. No room for AL or AL thoughts. My son plays basketball and the tip off tourney is tonight. Looking forward to it as it's the beginning of basketball season. We have games every Tuesday and Friday, so Friday has always been a strong trigger for me and I'm thankful that I don't need to think about AL at all the next several months on that particular day.

Humble and Patrice, I just gave a three paragraph writing assignment to my hormonal 8th grade babes. Haha, I love the looks on their faces as I go through all the expectations! But the higher the expectations, the better the output. I love reading them (well, most of the time). Humble, good luck today at the memorial event. Keep a fresh thought in your mind, "I don't drink for anyone or any reason because I love myself."

SL, you and Available are nurses! I have so much respect for that profession. What area of concentration or unit do you both work in? My SIL just got her nurse practitioner's license and she loves her new job.

SL - you've got AL talking to you and you need to shut him up. Remember you love yourself too much for him to ruin you. When we are tired, that's the biggest trigger. I know it is for me at least. Have you heard of the HALT acronym? Hungry, Angry, Lonely, and Tired. Big triggers. What's your plan? Talk it out, write it out, and post, post, post!

Available, Oh, the boss story. I know those feelings. Early in my career, I was called into my principal's office. At the time, I was a special educator. A student I had was lazy, didn't put any work into anything, no effort whatsoever. Well, he said to me, this student cannot fail. If he fails, you're not doing your job. OMG. Whateva! Being a special needs teacher was always a rewarding experience, and I still work with them in my English classes, but we also have other supports for them. Not enough though. Take it with a grain of salt, sister, and enjoy your relaxing AF weekend!

Did anyone see the movie 9-5 back in the early 80's, with Lily Tomlin, Dolly Parton, and Jane Fonda? Ok, when we get angry at our bosses, let's do a little visualization, something like from the movie where they tied him up and kept him prisoner in his house for months. Just little visualizations can take the edge off!

Narilly, Brrrrr! Sorry you and hubby had a disagreement. You both live close to work that you can walk. How cool! And you must have been married the same year that I got married - 1990. July 21.

Ok, so I have to work the concession stand for a few hours tonight, then my son's game is at 8:00. I'll check in tomorrow with you girls. Have a wonderful, sober Friday!

[Dottie Belle]

Ladies on a Mission Week 3

Snowing and 27F here...staying in all day...it is pretty when I don't have to go out in it..may make some soup from scratch...I am getting to be a good cook now that I have the time and am not laying around hung over and miserable.
I will be hanging around here all day...just lazy and trying to stay warm.

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission Week 3

mmmm! Dottie, now your talkin', make me some soup! It's freezing here!

J-Vo- you make me laugh! Hot flashes..thats good.

First of all, I can't express how much you ladies on a mission mean to me. I've never felt so good about coming to MWO and felt the support that I do from this thread. We are in this together and you know what they say about strength in numbers. So I'm grateful to you gals!

Ditto that babe!

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission Week 3

Hi - spent the morning speaking to four classes at my daughters middle school career day - now I have a headache - not cut out to be a teacher for sure. Then came home and had to give one of my higher staff some feedback which he was not at all happy to hear and extremely defensive. UGGG - enough to make me drink too - but as you say Avail - not going to give him the power to drive me to drink! Too much ower for one measly human to have - p'd off too!
Pav - I am Scottish and came to Ca in my 20's, now in 50"s and forgot to go home - and yes it is cold here!! We are not built for it in sunny Ca so I think it is worse when it hits - and to go from 110 in summer to 18 in winter is a huge switch. We are supposed to egt snow here tonight which has happened twice in the 15yrs I have been here....
Well now - having a panic as I am nowhere near ready for Christmas - I must have got used to Thanksgiving as I have run out of time - and I am blaming it on Thangsiving coming so late in the year - will have to catch up this weekend in the middle of trying to get everything else done

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission Week 3

Hi - spent the morning speaking to four classes at my daughters middle school career day - now I have a headache - not cut out to be a teacher for sure. Then came home and had to give one of my higher staff some feedback which he was not at all happy to hear and extremely defensive. UGGG - enough to make me drink too - but as you say Avail - not going to give him the power to drive me to drink! Too much power for one measly human to have - p'd off too!
Pav - I am Scottish and came to Ca in my 20's, now in 50"s and forgot to go home - and yes it is cold here!! We are not built for it in sunny Ca so I think it is worse when it hits - and to go from 110 in summer to 18 in winter is a huge switch. We are supposed to egt snow here tonight which has happened twice in the 15yrs I have been here....
Well now - having a panic as I am nowhere near ready for Christmas - I must have got used to Thanksgiving as I have run out of time - and I am blaming it on Thangsiving coming so late in the year - will have to catch up this weekend in the middle of trying to get everything else done

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission Week 3

SL, Brrr...that is cold for California! We are pretty used to it here and have great insulated homes and central heating so it is not so bad.
That sucks to have a stressful day like that. Dealing with defensive people, gross for sure!
I had a shitty start to my day dealing with my husband who has the lowest emotional intelligence ever! Anyway, I have been working on that all day. I find that hard to deal with because I don't always know how he is going to react. He can be a real ass if he drinks too much. But whatever!
We are going out for supper tonight and I am going to have a glass of some AF drink. Not sure what yet. This is a place where I have drank lots of times but I don't have any craving to drink tonight. So no problemo!

I was reading this book which someone here suggested.I will give you the name when I remember it. Something about addiction. In the book, the author says that there are triggers that make you drink. A lot of times its because people feel helpless in some situation. Today, I thought about drinking for a minute and then sat back and really thought about why drinking was coming into my mind. I think it was not having a plan for the evening, I am thinking boredom is one of my triggers. I don't like being alone and having nothing to do...maybe it is being alone? Anyway, I'm just blabbing on.

I will talk to you beautiful young ladies later.
Time to bundle up and go home. Just imagine, it takes about 10 minutes just to get all my gear on to walk home! lol
xo

[Pavati]

Ladies on a Mission Week 3

Good Evening, Everyone.

I was a social studies teacher, so I have corrected a lot of grammar in my time, too. Can't we just all agree that when typing fast and on various devices from secret corners of work we won't worry about fixing typos, grammar and spelling? We all know that we all know what's right, right? :goodjob:

SL - Yes, it might snow where I am, too. VERY rare as we are nowhere near the mountains. I almost turned to nursing after my first several years as a teacher. I have always been fine with the blood and guts - it was just the other bodily fluids that turned me off.

Dottie - I'll take some soup, too. I'm glad to hear you've been cooking more. I love to cook, but it has a strong association to drinking for me. It hasn't been a problem this time, and I hope it doesn't become one.

J-Vo - I have a busy and kid-filled weekend, too. I am very happy to have the ability to be present and not hung over for it all. While you're at the snack bar, grab me some red vines?

Humble - I hope your memorial day was not too hard and that you appreciated celebrating the life of your loved one with a clear head.

Narilly - Your description of what you put on to walk to work (without your un-emotionally-intelligent DH) made me laugh. I thought of Maggie Simpson whose arms and legs stuck straight out when dressed for the cold.

One thing you said reminded me of something that I have heard here a number of times and also talked with my counselor about tonight: the fact that you thought about thinking about drinking - or meta-analysis of the origin of a craving. Each time you do that you are building your sober muscles more and more so that you'll be able to stop cravings sooner or avoid them all together. Wow - I'm not sure if that made sense, but basically, analyzing a craving will help you avoid it in the future. Not sure why I didn't say it like that in the first place.:H

Everyone else, I hope your Friday nights were safe and sober. Pleasant dreams and here's to a hungover free weekend!

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission Week 3

Pav- that is a good synopsis of what I was trying to say. Thank you. The book is, Breaking Addiction by Lance Dodes. I haven't finished it yet but so far so good.
Ya, it is pretty funny how we have to dress to stay warm up here. Lol! You have to try it sometime
Pav- glad you are sober and present.
Same goes to all of you gals.
I'm going to the SMART meeting tomorrow unless my car doesn't start. It's -30 tonight and my car doesn't have a plug in for the heater. Don't ask me why I would own a car like that in Canada! So I will let you know if I make it. I really want to go but we are in a deep freeze right now.

[HumbleRider]

Ladies on a Mission Week 3

Hi all,
J-vo, good excuse about the hot flashes! I just read that menopausal symptoms can last 20 years in some women. And your "I don't drink anymore for any reason because I love myself." Good one.

Dottie Belle, after I go to see my elderly friend's new house, I'm going to stay in too. With the wind chill here, it's in the single digits F. And I'm planning to make split pea soup.

SL, I had to have that uncomfortable talk the other day with on of the teachers in the program who used to be a coordinator--she doesn't take kindly to my upbraiding her for anything, even the most heinous errors, and this was one of them. In the past, I would be thinking of the drinks I'd have later to relax. Now I just think it's all in the way I react as to whether it becomes a trigger or not.

Narilly, when I let my husband get under my skin, AV says 'Go now and get something to drink, then consume mightily until you've shown him!' Really emotionally stupid on my part, I know. The other day we got in a tiff, and...nothing! I did not consider a drink. Thank goodness.

Pav, metathinking is working for me.

Okay, so the Memorial Day yesterday went really well. I told my friend that I didn't feel like drinking these days, which is the truth, and she was very light-hearted about it and did not pout or pressure. She had a Bloody Mary and I had one too, without alcohol. I was not tempted or uncomfortable in the least while I was there. We played pull tabs and won $170. There was this drunk guy at a table behind us who kept spewing and slurring filth, so much so that the bartender came over to us and apologized, calling him an idiot. I was so grateful that wasn't me.

Hope all you ladies are enjoying another AF day. I sure am! Thanks for all the words and thoughts of support for yesterday. Worked! --Day 34 here--

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission Week 3

Morning - chilly here, lots of rain, but it did not snow (that I saw anyway!), Snow level has got to 200 ft I heard on news thou - lots of skiing for those so inclined!
Well, to do list is huge, so better get off to it...

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission Week 3

Hi Beautiful Ladies on a Mission,

Last night was our kick off tournament (continues today) for our basketball season. I'm so excited that my son is playing on varsity this year and is starting. OMG. The excitement and joy it brings to a mommy. And to be there and not miss a beat (meaning me) is a gift. I'm grateful. Really grateful. I hate working the concession stand as I'm not good with making change. They probably lose money when I work!

I listened to an interview this morning that is above in the General Board that treetops posted. It was really excellent and this woman has her book out called, Drink: Intimate Relationship Between Women and Alcohol. I listened to this and I think we could all relate to so many of the things she talked about. Couple of things that caught my ear:

*Don't aim for happiness. Aim for grace and gratitude.
*Our secrets kill us. The mental health profession has done a lot in this area to reducing this stigma.

She is a fan of AA, but not a bible-thumping version. She goes to lots of woman's meetings. She said to connect with others that you can relate to.

Anyhow, if you have time, listen to it. I'm going to purchase the book!

Dottie, we are neighbors. I'm in PA. We got snow last night after a warm front! It was 63 degrees on Thursday, then snow yesterday. Enjoy your hot soup and stay warm, friend.

SL, that was so nice that you volunteered for career day! I hope you get some "stuff" accomplished today. I know, it's right around the corner, and I've only got a few things done. We're having a small x-mas here this year as the rest of family will stay in Philly due to Dad's health. He will get out of rehab for a broken ankle and torn ligaments on his knew/had surgery and cast for 6 weeks from hip to toe. Now he's in intensive physical therapy. I'm going to visit over the holidays.

Narilly, good for you for not letting your argument get to you and I mean the bottle. That's progress, dear, and you should pat yourself on the back. How did your dinner go? You're right about the planning thing. I think that's when I'm insecure...when I don't have a plan in place. Let us know how SMART goes.

Pav, yes, agreed! No proofreading! Yay! And the "analyzing a craving will help you to avoid it and build stronger muscles." Yep, yep, and yep. Thank you .

Humble, glad your memorial went well. $170! Yippee! As far as the drunk, those situations can make us stronger. We don't want to look like that. You sound strong and at peace. Congrats on your day 34!

Well, more BB today! Have a lovely day, Ladies.

[Dottie Belle]

Ladies on a Mission Week 3

MAE all,
5 inches of snow and they are predicting more for tomorrow..boohiss....
Children's Christmas party was fun...made more snow cones than I could count..but seemed like everyone had a good time and that was the important thing..but my back hurts from standing for 4 hours....not used to that at all. May need the heating pad for a while....guess I am out of shape. Oh well beats the alternative.