Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Get well Narilly - that does not sound good!
Thanks for all the messages. This is my third 30 day plus - two years ago I managed 62 days (thru Christmas and NY) then drank a very expensive bottle of wine I got for Christmas - should have taken everyones advice and re-gifted, but it was my favourite:upset::upset:. Took me a long time to get another 30days, then blew that one too. I think that is why I have been thinking so much about what to do when I got to 30days this time....Star sorted me out by telling me so sweetly to just go day to day, once I did that I stopped stressing about reaching my goal and what to do next - I am back to ODAT, and I am not thinking of forever at all, and the stress has gone!!
So onward and upwards with all my friends here on MWO....:l:l
I am not drinking today......

[Dottie Belle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Time to vent ladies,
DH is a dolt again...I swear if something happens I will never, ever, never get married again...
Folks think he is so nice and sweet etc but they don't see the mean/lazy side of him that I see...we have been together almost 20 years and he gets worse by the day...aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
vent over...

[patrice]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi Dot.. vent away it really helps. Is he usually like this or is it a stage he is going through??.. A few deep breaths!!

I'm up super early.. sleep has again been terrible for the last few nights. Well today is 7 days ( kinda 8 really but when I had that wine last Sat, it was after midnight when I stopped).. Off on my long journey later with my little one.. he's pretty good on planes .. and all I can say is thank god we have an ipad mini!
Coffee and will be back later !!
x
Pat

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

MAE all.

Pav it was very sad to see people so young drinking like they did especially the guy with pancreatitis and the girl needing a liver transplant. My thought was "i never drank that much". there went my al brain making excuses again.

Humble that was funny about your hysterectomy, nothing stopped us die hards did it. I slipped two discs in my back and was bed bound for a week or so, that didnt stop me, got my sons to get it, for pain relief of course or went to drs for pain relief and stopped at the bottlo for a stock up.

Dot we are getting there which is great, makes life so much easier to have some idea on what I am doing on my lappy, i know that so its very appreciated. Gambler did pm me with another photo site so pm me if you want that so we can put pics on here. Its called Photobucket.

Nar hope you are feeling better soon. I had a drinking dream last night and abused someone for some reason about drinking. Day 14 and looking forward to a mum daughter day and a nice coffee in the sun before some serious candlemaking. Have not done that since i was in high school, so a couple of years ago now.

SL good on you for your switch, i too am a ODAT girl now. I used to think and think about not drinking EVER again and that would make me drink. I could not get my head around never drinking again, now i just say i wont drink today and it is much much easier. I never had a favourite wine except Sauv blanc which i kept a few wineries in business nicely. It all tasted the same and went down the same.

Dot you are so making me not want a man, thank you. My ex of 17 years whom i sent to greener pastures to my ex best friend was so lazy. I told him when the kids were young that if he didnt change i would leave and he didnt and i left and he then had the audacity to say he would change. Gees wtf I thought. Sedate him Dot is my recommendation lol.

Pat I hope you have a lovely relaxing and fun holiday af. I will be thinking of you over in NZ. So close to Aus. Hope you manage to get on the net for a check in and if not we will all be waiting to here how it all went.

Humble i have downloaded photoblip and will go and have a look maybe tonight. Hope the program i pm'd you works. I am right into a tv series Haven so had to watch it last night but now have to wait a week for another, that gets frustrating.

Well ladies, time for another cup of tea and then get ready to spend a lovely day with my girl. The sun is shining and birds singing and I am one happy sober soul.

I will not drink today.
xx

[Dottie Belle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Patrice I don't know if it is a phase or not...but the older he gets the more cranky..he is 16 years older and there are days it seems like a huge chasm between us...
Available I have a photobucket account...I will try to upload some pics soon. I am going to print the instructions out so I can read and I am trying to follow..

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Dot - I managed to leave mine 3 years ago - he is too lazy to do his part of the divorce, so I remain attached to him - it took me 23 years to work it out, 17 years of marriage and we lived together before - maybe it was a big hint when it took me so long to decide to marry him - but things are so much better now my girls and I are making a new life for ourselves - it is a big struggle, but much better this way.
It seems that you really have to work out what is the best thing for you, life is too short to bu unhappy....

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi Ladies!

Well, it's been snowing off and on here all day. I managed to get out and x-mas shop though. Very messy but got some things accomplished. Nice, quiet Saturday night here. Going to relax, eat Chinese food and maybe watch a movie. Awww. Sounds lovely. OH, the drinking when ill....yep. I have to say, you know you're an alcoholic when you still manage to guzzle when you've got a fever, head cold, and everything else! Certainly thought it made me feel better, although it probably did kill off some germs quicker!

Nar, hope you're feeling better, darling!

Patrice, so you used Itunes to download from? We have itunes and I'm gonna try that also. Have a safe trip and enjoy your family!!!

Pav, loved your quote from the nest. Makes so much sense and is very true. I will post that in my journal as a reminder when I'm feeling low and think I should be on top of the world. Glad you made it through the work party!! Boredom is fine. Drunk is not. Way to go!

Ava, you put the kindle on your laptop! Haha! We are getting smarter by the second! Love this. Enjoy your candlemaking with your daughter. Sounds like lots of fun. It's a perfect activity for quality time with her. And what movie were you talking about with the guy having pancreatitis, and the girl needing a lilver?

Dot, venting is a good idea. Get it off your chest. Holding it in only creates problems, especially for us.

SL you sound wonderful! back to ODAT. These little thought changes can do big things for us.

Giraffe, DTD, Star, RL, Freefly, NS, Humble and all you lovely ladies, have a wonderful MAE!

[Pavati]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi, Friends--

I feel very blah right now. I went to a lunch that we have every year in honor of a friend (older) who died in 2005. We spend three or four hours at the table, laughing and sharing stories while eating really good food and catching up. Normally I would have had a cocktail and a glass of champagne - but it was never a time that I over drank. It was one of the times that I can point to where AL was (seemed to be) my friend. Of course, no one wants to keep a friend who is moderately nice to you here and there, but a backstabbing, liar asshole most of the time. But the setting made me miss him a bit. I didn't want to see him, and I was fine not drinking (especially seeing a friend who I know struggles with AL slightly overdo it), but the whole thing sort of made me feel blah.

I actually think I feel blah because I am over scheduled for the foreseeable future. Parties, family events, work stuff, getting ready for Christmas, etc. etc. etc. I do think that December (in the North) is a time when we're supposed to be hibernating, slowing down, snuggling in - NOT going balls out to celebrate! have fun! party! 24/7! I honestly and truly know that alcohol would make everything I am feeling even worse, because I would feel blah plus guilty, remorseful and sick.

I am struggling with never and forever, but not because I can't imagine life without alcohol - I actually can imagine it quite well. Right now I feel like the struggle is that I am mad and disappointed at myself for not having control and not being able to keep myself from getting in this position. I feel like an idiot. I know intellectually that is not true, but my emotional side is in charge at the moment.

Dottie - I'm sorry for what you're going through with your husband. I went through a very rough patch with my DH a number of years ago - I thought it was the end. What helped me make it through (in addition to the reasons I married him to begin with) was understanding that I couldn't control his behavior - only my reaction to his behavior. I try to focus on his strengths and understand his weaknesses. My al anon sisters love to say, "today's expectation is tomorrow's disappointment."

Sorry to be a downer this afternoon. I am off to ANOTHER party. I will be there for a short time and then will be back with an attitude adjustment () - at least I'll try.

I hope you are all doing well. J-Vo, you posted something on another thread that I was going to mention here, and now I can't find it - it was another of those "you, too?" moments. I'll see if I can find it.

Everyone else - sorry this post is so me-centric. That's where I am right now. Congratulations on all of your great successes, and thanks for your support.

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Pav,
Remember the post you posted from yesterday on Happiness, that treetops shared? Reread that. You don't have to be on top of the world 24/7. You can have those down times, and guess what! You can do it because it's normal. Please cut yourself a break and just go with it. Maybe slip a positive thought in your head every now and then if you feel like it. This time of year is so very overwhelming for everyone and that makes us anxious. Take it one minute at a time, and remember, you do have peace inside of you right now. Breath, dear.

[Dottie Belle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Thanks everyone..I know that I can not change him and I need to adjust myself and how I react. I also think part of this is the darn gloomy weather and I cant get out and get any sunshine or do anything fun. Kind of feel trapped here with him and 24/7 is way too much...plan to join a gym first of the year so I have a place to go and work off my frustrations and get more ME time...that is the plan.

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Pav, that was how I was feeling all last week - I do not feel that I expressed myself as well as you have.
I was feeling very resentful, and the idea of never again was really putting me in a bad place. I have two wonderful girls and the idea of not having a glass or two of champagne at their wedding is more than I can take.
I know I have to change to a feeling of gratitude instead of everything else, but making that switch is beyond me...
I am sorry for your day today as it has highlighted my biggest block to succeeding...
I am trying my hardest to just take each day, or even each minute and live it without too much looking forward....
And, I was just wishing that the world could stop for a day so I could get off and breathe a bit. but didn't happen....

Dottie - I hope you did not read me wrong, if you cna save your marriage that is the best - I was just saying don't spend too long in unhappiness - work out what YOU need to be happy and go for it....you are important....

[Dottie Belle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

SL I didnt misunderstand....I totally agree that I need to put myself first....I plan to stay where I am...he has good qualities and I have to remember those when he starts to drive me nuts...it will be OK.....

[patrice]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi girls
Dot - i'm sure it's just being stuck together for long periods of time.. and the weather too, things will be much better when you get out and about a bit!
Pav- I completely understand how you are feeling. I'm not looking ahead at this stage, just each day at a time. Really felt like having a drink after i had finished all my stuff last night. Just told myself not now...
SL - Totally understand you as well! I haven't looked ahead to next week when I will be surrounded with family and friends for the first time in 18months.. I can't or I will start over thinking!
J- Vo - no, I downloaded from isohunt and transferred it into itunes.. it worked!
Hi Narilly - hope you are much better today
Hi Ava - will defo miss our daily chats when all the other girls are in bed.. Not too likely I will be online but will give it a go
Well I'm off in an hour - all ready,, looking ahead to the long flight and this will be the first time I will say no to those onboard drinks.. normally on these long flights I would be quaffing all the free drinks. Today no
Take care all and have a fab Xmas
I'll be checking in the moment I get back ( on 31st.. NY's EVE)
xx
Patrice

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

How long is your flight Pat? Oh the free drinks, forgot about them, i went to thailand, took two valium and i was near the kitchen where they did the drinks without measuring, mmm great flight. Have a great time and one day at a time with drinking

Jvo i will look for the name of the documentary it was on youtube. Someone on NN posted it.

SL i am with you about getting rid of hubs. took me ages too to say yes to getting married, should have realised but it wasnt an unhappy 17 years just i did everything.

Well candlemaking was great fun sober, driving sober, being sober. Had a coffee and made lots of candles and spent quality time together. we are thinking of making lots and getting a little store and it is something i feel i can have a big interest in. My other daughter messaged me and said she is coming over for dinner so a baked dinner it is tonight.

One more week of work and then holidays. Looking forward to getting house in order and doing nothing.

will post longer later as daughter here for a visit.

[patrice]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hey Ava - great about the candle making.. I love candles!
Flight is 10 hours
+ 2 hours to get to singapore
Have a great xmas xx