Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[daisy45]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Thank you all for your support - really, I am fine. I think night-time brings on deep thinking. I realise now that after I divorced all those years ago, was also when I would sit alone when kids were in bed.....that is when I started drinking away from the normal, and gradually it went from beer to wine to nightly. Isn't hindsight wonderful?
Waking up to a bright and breezy day works wonders.....went to the gym, read all your great posts, attitude of gratitude and bingo! For today anyway....but that is good.....tomorrow is a new day. I really appreciate all your posts.....made all the difference!
Rox, hang in there....this is a fine bunch, all here to support you....

[roxane]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Day one done daisy and narilly. Apart from a raging craving in the afternoon it's not been too bad.

Attitude of gratitude!

[daisy45]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Rox, the best part is waking up sober and clear-headed; that is the time of day that I try to use to carry me through until bedtime. Savour that satisfaction and know that it will only get better.....

[little beagle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Daisy I agree. Waking up clear headed and sober no anxiety is wonderful. Also being able to really sleep again. I will post more later. Off to clean the office.

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

What a great night for our team. We won sole possession Section Title. This has not happened ever in the history of our team and my son was a big part of it. Son did super tonight and played almost whole game. We meet them back at the school to pick them up after away games, and since this was a special night, we honked our horns as the boys got off the bus. It was so great.

[NoSugar]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

j-vo;1622753 wrote: Hi girls,
This is where I get off the pity party bus. I'm done feeling sorry for myself as I was for the last three days. I ready to move on and live my AF life with you cool AF girls.
.That bus is going nowhere, J, so good for you getting off. Honestly, I don't see how anyone with a negative attitude can get his done! How do they make it through the tough parts if they don't truly believe they are on their way to a better life? Keep your eye on that prize .
narilly;1622799 wrote:
So what do you think the successful ones do? Keep posting, help others on this site, what else?

I read this earlier, Nar, and it sparked my interest in what works. I've made a list (in no particular order) of what, at different times over the last year, has worked for me. Maybe others could add to it.

Committed to 100% honest posting
Vowed to post before taking a drink.
Other than responsibilities, did only what I felt like doing; e.g. exercised only when it sounded like a good idea.
When I felt like it, got back to hobbies I enjoy.
Ate the way I feel best - high quality, nutrient-dense food.
Occasionally used L-glutamine.
Spent formerly wasted time on MWO (~4 hours/day).
Read and learned all I could about biological, chemical, and psychological aspects of addiction.
Watched movies and videos on the subject.
Asked many questions of and advice from people I admire on MWO.
Modeled my actions and thoughts on those of people who were succeeding.
Learned from the mistakes of others.
Offered support whenever possible and advice when I could.
Developed relationships on MWO with people ahead and behind me.
Had back-up phone numbers and email addresses for when MWO was unavailable and used them.
Deliberately adopted an attitude of gratitude by noticing the small but important improvements in my life.
Made it clear to people in my life that I no longer drink.

So, ladies, what else works for you?

[little beagle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

I have tried to reprogram my brain. Alcoho-bad, poison. Life with out it -good.
I listened to what the successful people told me. I tried to befriend those in need of a friend on this journey. And I started loving myself again.
Plus I hug my dogs at least once a day.

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi - long post coming up.....NOT! Got home safe and sound, and another day successfully AF, yeah! Office day with long commute - car had check engine light, at least $1000 for parts, have to order parts, couple days.....and still not drinking, love it!!!
Good to see all doing ok today (did quick skim thru so hope I didn't miss anything..)

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

SL, thank you.
I have changed the way I look at AL. From something I desire to something I am grateful to be free from.
I view AL as a poison that society accepts because so many make money from it and by keeping us addicted. I don't want to be part of that.

Those are my additions.

It's so frickin cold here. -32c windchill. I wore my long johns to work under my pants. We actually have a long john index here to tell us if we need to wear them or not!
My face was almost frozen walking home, I had to go inside and warm up a couple of times.
It's +23c in Orlando at 11pm, holy cow!!! I am so looking forward to being warm for 10 days.

Goodnight!

[giraffe1234]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

100 days

100 days have arrived, and it still feels surreal that I had my last drink on 27 October 2013. I had actually opened a 2nd bottle of wine (it was a Sunday). However, snatches of posts I had read as a lurker on MWO kept coming back to me. After a while I retrieved the cork from the trash (how disgusting!) and told myself I?d have the wine the next day. Three weeks later I threw it out. The guardian angels must have guided my googling fingers to find MWO.

Reasons why I drank:
I love wine, and I love the way it complements food. That will probably never change.
To make my relationship tolerable (I am trapped there financially; just got to live with it)
To crush memories and guilt
To alleviate anxiety of the general and social kind
Work pressure

Reasons why I need to be sober:
I could not control the drinking anymore ? it went way beyond wine going well with food.
I often became pie-faced by 20:00 and passed out in front of the TV.
I went to great lengths to organise activities not to clash with drinking time. Drinking time and quantities steadily increased.
I was unsteady at social events and my speech slurred.
I got so tired of lying about/explaining/concealing alcohol breath.
My drinking was destroying my health, and realised I was going to kill myself with either organ failure or drunk driving.
I was missing out on my children?s lives big time. I could not remember conversations we had, movies we watched, and moments we had shared.
The hang-overs and shakes became intolerable.

Being sober did not improve matters re. the emotionally abusive relationship, but at least I can now remember all of it every day. I believe feeling and remembering the brunt of it is a good thing. Not an easy thing, but the right thing.
The memories and guilt remain; I am working on that.

I am still disappointed that the wrinkles around my eyes did not magically fade, that I still have dark circles under my eyes, and that my energy levels have not soared to dizzying heights.

Statistics are not on my side, and in all probability I will fall off the wagon sooner or later. I really don?t want to, but at least if/when I do, I will not be judged here at MWO. Every day is a new beginning now.
Like HumbleRider said: It is a blessing to have friends who celebrate success and accept failure. I could never have come this far without all of you.

Thank you to each and every one of you for your unconditional support.

[Dottie Belle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

giraffe huge congrats on 100 days...that is a mjor accomplishment!! You should be proud of yourself!!
:goodjob::wd::applaud::yougo:

[giraffe1234]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Thank you Dottie!
Thank you!!!

[Pavati]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Nar – My session with my counselor tonight was about community and how important it is to belong to a community of sober people to hold each other accountable, and to keep each other honest when that dick head starts speaking words out of our mouths like “just one will be ok.” Those drinking dreams involving having to face the loamers are proof to me that I value you all so much. Florida will be WONDERFUL. I was complaining about the cold here today – it dropped to nearly 40F (that’s positive 40, not minus).

Glad you’re feeling better, Daisy. I was in a funk for three weeks, but I feel like I am pulling out of it. I will follow your reminder – attitude of gratitude!

Way to go, Roxanne – stay strong and stay with us! You can do this. I recommend a detox bath with Epsom salts – the magnesium is supposed to help with anxiety. Drink plenty of water and eat good food.

LB – Good luck with your meeting with your daughter. I agree with you and Daisy that waking is the best part – no anxiety, no guilt, and no empty promises to myself.

NS – All of that sounded good on your list to me. I would add that writing down and making myself remember how terrible I felt from my last hangover and adding it to my mental playlist. If I think about a drink I say to myself, “what would a successful sober person do with this thought?” I remember that you all say “play it out to the end.” And I think about getting drunk, waking up at 3am with the GSR brothers, and the feeling of the hangover in the morning. Then I take a moment to find several ways I am grateful for being sober, thank myself for quitting the beast, and go on with my day. I would also offer that it is good to get yourself up and out no matter how you feel, even if it is just for a quick trip around the block, or even to corner and back. I firmly believe that fresh air and exercise are very potent medicines against ennui and anxiety.

SL – thanks for the check in. If you had a drink that would have been an $1,010 day. Think of all you saved! I really appreciate your strength through the FWad situation, and your being there for your girls.

Dottie – those moods bother me! I feel like I should wake up grateful and happy every day, and sometimes it is irritating when that doesn’t happen. Of course, then we remember that waking up in that mood isn’t nearly as bad as waking up hung over and in that mood. Phew.

Giraffe! Amazing on 100 days, and an amazing 100 day post. I am so proud of your accomplishments and am glad you are sharing your journey with us. I believe – because I HAVE to believe – that relapse is NOT inevitable. I think if you take steps to stay sober and really, really work you can and will. I am not putting down anyone who hasn’t stayed sober, but if I didn’t believe I could beat relapse I would have a hard time taking the choice of drinking off the table. If I was going to fall eventually, why not now? I guess that’s where the One Day at a Time motto comes in. You sound strong and steady – like a loping giraffe!

J-Vo – Congratulations on your son’s team. Let me give you a hand as you step off that pity party bus and hang out with us, full of our attitudes of gratitude!

Jennie – your swim is described perfectly. I would have to get up in the dark and swim in an outdoor pool, so I am not motivated for winter swimming, but I’ll get back to it this spring and summer. I’m glad you found this thread. I was lurking back when you and NS joined, and enjoyed reading your story – you had a lot to add.

Patrice – glad you checked in. One more day and you get a full moon! Maybe Star will help Byrdie out here?

Star – hope you’re ok! Busy making Giraffe’s 100-day prize??

How you doing, Humble? I am trying to balance MWO and getting to bed on time – they are both important to me.

RG – Welcome back. Read back for my post on uniqueness – I think there is inspiration there that might help you get passed a bad day. Have you thought about what to do the next time you feel the pull of AL? Come here and post, for one.

Ava – you have been a monster (in the good way) around MWO. I really loved how you supported the newbies in the nest last night – I could hear the relief in their posts after you supported them with your inspirational words. Maybe you have a future as a motivational speaker? And I love the idea that you feel sorry for your ex FWad because he lacks your strength and determination. Poor FWad! (And I love free food, too.)

Phew – you all write a lot! Hard to respond to everyone. I have Ava’s fear of missing someone – if I did, so sorry. It is late and I’ve been busy – excuses, excuses.

xo
Pav

[HumbleRider]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Congratulations, Giraffe. You've been a role model helping me to remain sober. Thank you for your presence here and yahoo!! Love your 100 day post.

I spent a lot of time just reading to catch up and now my eyes are flagging. Will try to get an Ava style post in tomorrow.

J-vo, you sound good.

Roller Girl, pick yourself up, dust off, and jump back in the saddle. Your posse awaits!

Everyone else, take care, we all sound sober right now. By the way, if anyone needs or just wants to talk, you can always email, text, or call. What NS and others keep saying is so true--we are fortunate to have each other and should reach out to one another when we need a true friend and honest support. xo

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi guys
My eleven year old dog is at the vets, I'm a wreck but have Mia with me. Send me hugs. No al though but thought I would type it to b accountable. On later
Xxx