Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[little beagle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Narilly glad you got through that night out. The next time won't be so hard.
I thought of you yesterday Dottie in our 80? weather wearing sleeveless tops and shorts. You can commiserate with me this summer. Everything has a price.

[NoSugar]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

That storm was coming my way, DB, but I guess it decided to go somewhere else. (I'm not complaining, mind you :H!). We have a few inches of snow so I could ski but it also is very, very cold and I'm a Big Weenie .

Roxy, thanks for saying "hi". So glad you chose to begin again today. You know, starting over is just too hard to keep doing it. It may not seem like it to you right now, and there will be uncomfortable days ahead, but it is so much easier physically and emotionally, to just stick with it. The damage we do to our psyches when we let ourselves down over and over and over is just soul-crushing. Please don't do this to yourself anymore.

You might think this is easy for me to say because maybe it wasn't so hard for me or that I don't really remember because it was over a year ago. That all may be true. I have to concentrate really hard to remember the feeling of a hangover or a 3 a.m. heart-pounding, head-spinning wake up. I also have only a general feeling about how poorly I felt for several weeks after quitting. But I know that in all of this time since I quit, I've never suffered excrutiating pain, or blacked out, or been inexplicably injured, or said things I later regretted, or not known what I said, or hated myself, or considered the future absolutely pointless.

Not having those as part of my life anymore is worth any agitation and discomfort and self-pity I felt for a few weeks. This was such a small price to pay to get my life back.

Addicts go for the short-term reward so choosing sobriety is tough - it's a long-term goal and it requires ongoing nurturing. That may sound too hard to do but I promise you, it is much, much easier than starting again over and over.

xx, NS

[Pavati]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

MAE, Loamers--

This post is all about me - thanks in advance!

Part 1 - I spent my day 90 hiking, writing, cooking soup - very relaxing and productive. Then DH and I went out to a nice dinner with a gift certificate we had from Christmas. At first it was VERY hard for me. He ordered a cocktail, and I felt a longing. Then I looked around and noticed all of the wine glasses - wine wasn't really my drink of choice, but with a great meal I liked to have it. I was feeling deprived - literally EVERY table I could see all people were drinking alcohol except one with a kid. Then the food started coming, and it was delicious. DH and I had a great conversation - partially about my AL intake - he brought up Phillip Seymour Hoffman falling after 23 years and asked me if I thought about that. DUH (but he was very sweet and caring about it). Anyway - by then I was in to the food and conversation and had a great time, no deprivation feeling left at all.

Part 2 - we went to a small bar to see some friends and their band play. Normally I would have a buzz from dinner and would drink more at the bar, freeing me from my inhibitions and dancing up a storm. I was fine at the big concert - I could dance in relative anonymity, but last night the dance floor was small and anything but anonymous. I didn't want to go because I felt conspicuous, but then felt like I really wanted to show support for our friends, so we went. I was hanging back in the corner enjoying the music when friend came up behind me and pulled me onto the floor. I was terrified at first, but then just looked around at everyone enjoying themselves, all smiles, dancing to the music, and I was able to let go - unassisted by alcohol - to dance and have fun. I guess that was a hurdle of sorts, although I am sure I'll be self conscious next time, too. I know that I can overcome and have fun. I drove home pretty early, read my book and went to bed. DH got a pretty good buzz going, but he was fun instead of annoying. We had a great time.

And this morning I was able to get up and go to a yoga class, something I have avoided doing for a long time due to being hungover or not sleeping well (or both). Last night - no 3am anxiety, a proper sleep, and a great class this morning. A great weekend!

Narilly - so happy to hear you made it through AL free. A bottle of wine is a lot to watch someone drink - watching the transformation take place is amazing to me. I am heading for a ladies weekend next weekend, but another friend doesn't drink so we'll be ok.

Have to run - another sporting event for the boys. Have a great Sunday, everyone!

xo
Pav

I am truly

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Quick check in to say hi - so many success stories here, well done LOAMers!
I do read when looking for inspiration or confirmation - so keeping up with most of the happenings. It is a really fast moving thread thou. Rainy, dull day here and working, so doing some reading around the threads. Keep up the good work everyone and know that you are helping the lurkers:l

[NoSugar]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

I lurk on the thread you've been posting on, SL, so knew you were doing really well :goodjob:.
It is great to have you pop in here when you have a chance. xx- NS

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Thanks NS!
Just did a little counting and the last six months i have been working more than in the previous couple years - I have had 157 AF days out of 181....with Feb being my best, so the next six months will rock!!

[MossRose]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Just a quick check in to stay accountable. Went to the city today with some girlfriends to see a show. Had a great time. But haven't had time to read back on what I missed, so hope all of you are doing well. Nice to see you here, SL, and great job on racking up the sober days.

[HumbleRider]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi all,
I'm still here, still sober. I've been busy the past two days and for some reason I tossed and turned all night last night, so I'm going to bed now, eyes, flagging. Xo hope all is well, haven't had time to read, will catch up tomorrow.

[Pavati]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

G'night Loamers--

SL - thanks for checking in. I lurk and have seen you around, too. Sounds like you're doing well!

I got sucked into the Oscars even though I've only seen two movies this year. Blah blah blah.

Happy New Week!
xo

[sweetpea29]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Pavati;1633476 wrote: MAE, Loamers--

This post is all about me - thanks in advance!

Part 1 - I spent my day 90 hiking, writing, cooking soup - very relaxing and productive. Then DH and I went out to a nice dinner with a gift certificate we had from Christmas. At first it was VERY hard for me. He ordered a cocktail, and I felt a longing. Then I looked around and noticed all of the wine glasses - wine wasn't really my drink of choice, but with a great meal I liked to have it. I was feeling deprived - literally EVERY table I could see all people were drinking alcohol except one with a kid. Then the food started coming, and it was delicious. DH and I had a great conversation - partially about my AL intake - he brought up Phillip Seymour Hoffman falling after 23 years and asked me if I thought about that. DUH (but he was very sweet and caring about it). Anyway - by then I was in to the food and conversation and had a great time, no deprivation feeling left at all.

Part 2 - we went to a small bar to see some friends and their band play. Normally I would have a buzz from dinner and would drink more at the bar, freeing me from my inhibitions and dancing up a storm. I was fine at the big concert - I could dance in relative anonymity, but last night the dance floor was small and anything but anonymous. I didn't want to go because I felt conspicuous, but then felt like I really wanted to show support for our friends, so we went. I was hanging back in the corner enjoying the music when friend came up behind me and pulled me onto the floor. I was terrified at first, but then just looked around at everyone enjoying themselves, all smiles, dancing to the music, and I was able to let go - unassisted by alcohol - to dance and have fun. I guess that was a hurdle of sorts, although I am sure I'll be self conscious next time, too. I know that I can overcome and have fun. I drove home pretty early, read my book and went to bed. DH got a pretty good buzz going, but he was fun instead of annoying. We had a great time.

And this morning I was able to get up and go to a yoga class, something I have avoided doing for a long time due to being hungover or not sleeping well (or both). Last night - no 3am anxiety, a proper sleep, and a great class this morning. A great weekend!

Narilly - so happy to hear you made it through AL free. A bottle of wine is a lot to watch someone drink - watching the transformation take place is amazing to me. I am heading for a ladies weekend next weekend, but another friend doesn't drink so we'll be ok.

Have to run - another sporting event for the boys. Have a great Sunday, everyone!

xo
Pav

I am truly

Hi LOAMERS :hiya:

Quick shout-in before work.

Great work Pav Congratulations on 90 Days :wd:

[lifechange]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Sounds like everyone had a successful weekend!
I am off to work and will check in again this afternoon.

[roxane]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

:wd::happy::wd::happy:


haha pav congrats!

[giraffe1234]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Fantastic Pavati - especially the dancing without alcohol bit! Great job.
I still have to try extra hard to really enjoy a good meal without wine (which is without question my drink of choice); but then at least I remember the meal, remember what I said and what others said, and I feel fine the next day.
You are lucky to have a kind and supporting partner to encourage you.
Keep up the good work!
xx

[little beagle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Pav you rock. I am so proud of you. Having fun w/out alcohol is really having fun I think. It makes our brains happy. Releases all those good chemicals we try to get from our addictions. If that makes sense?
off to work for me today. Have a good one all.

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Pav, that is the best story Ever!! Way to go! It is amazing that we can actually have fun without AL. All these years of drinking, we were just fooling ourselves or hiding from ourselves. Now we can really be in the moment and enjoy our lives, not just blur them out.

I was reading Allan Carr last night and one thing he said struck me. He said: Why would you try and moderate? If you try and do that then everytime you have AL you keep the little monster alive and will continually obsess about when your next drink will be and how you will moderate. This will trigger the Big monster to come back eventually and you will end up drinking more than ever. AL is addictive and posionous.
(that was my paraphrasing and probably not totally acurate)

I am proud of myself for not drinking on Saturday night with my gal pals. I am proud because I was seriously thinking I was going to moderate that night. I followed your advice (SL, J-Vo, Ava, Pav, Humble, everyone) I posted about it. I talked to you girls. That really, really helped me. A TON!!

Now I have another weekend I am worried about and it is not until April. I am going out of town to a beautiful mountain town by Calgary with my best friend who I have known since I was 4 years old. She was the first person I drank with. She is a moderate drinker. Anyway, I told her I did not want to drink on that weekend and she said "of course we are going to drink! We can have a glass of wine with dinner, we have to celebrate that we are turning 50!" I said "ok". But I am obsessing about that weekend now and I don't want to do that. I also don't want to drink so I have to figure out how to deal with it. I will be coming to you gals for help

SL, I am glad you are feeling good. You sound great and are doing really well. So nice to hear from you. xo

LB, that totally makes sense. Havind fun without AL is really having fun.

Giraffe, a big bear hug from me

Talk to you soon girls!