Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Moring Girls,

LC, the gift bags are different for each grade. I'm not in charge of buying that everything, so I don't know what will goi into each, I'm just going to put them together. Yes, I love watching the basketball, too. I get so nervous when DS is on the court, but the excitement of it all is so fun. Baseball is low key, but i still get nervous everytime he's up at bat or pitching. I've been that way since he was 5 years old. I'm glad you came to get the frsutration off your chest. You did the right thing. And not drinking over them is right!!!!! Stay in the moment girl.

Ava, she did look at me like I was a nutter. I saw it in her eyes. Oh well, that's just me, and I have to learn how to say less and let it go. You've hit the nail on the head with boys and girls. My son doesn't wanna hang out with us much, but I still grab him and kiss and hug him anytime I want. He gets sick of me but I don't care.

LB, yes, you're right. My anxious personality is something I've come to accept, but I also know that I can bring it down several notches if I work at it. I don't need to give a thousand excuses within a minute and I'm going to work on that, as I won't be drinking forever! I have time to learn.

Humble? Are you ok?

Nar, did you get your beauty sleep?

Hey Dot!

NS, what are you up to this weekend?

Have a great day ladies.

[NoSugar]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

acadiaofmaine;1635442 wrote: Day 63 here...I am still in AA. I go hot and cold with it, to be honest. Congratulations, Ann - I'm so so happy for you! Glad AA is working well. I don't think any program is perfect. Heck, I've gotten mad and sworn I was outta here a few times when some things happened. But, like anything else, you've got to take the bad with the good and focus on the good.
Please keep letting us know how you're doing :l.

j-vo;1635462 wrote: She mentioned again about having wine and having fun. There are 5 other women going to work on this. Of course I didn't need to say anything, but right away, I got nervous and said:
I gave alcohol up for lent. Then I said...
I've been getting these nasty blotches all over when I drink lately...
I don't know if it's menopause, but...
I just got lots of blood work done last week...
Omg, it must be menopause...I gained 30 lbs. in the last three years! (that's true and so was the blood work)
So after saying all of this, I though to myself, FFS, why did I say anything!!!!!! I just kept rambling on and on.
.You crack me up, j-vo :H! As my husband always said to my kids about being gracious winners, we've got to act like we've been here before... When my friend asked me how long I'd not been drinking a couple weeks ago and I responded with the exact number of months it occurred to me I might as well put a red A on my forehead! Why in the heck didn't I say "about a year"???? Afterwards, though, I thought 'who cares'? I am proud to be a non-drinker.
I think LB's got it:
little beagle;1635534 wrote: J-vo I personally don't think people need a lot of explanation why I don't drink. I just don't. A smile and saying no, I'm happy with this water, juice, or whayever is usually sufficient. I downplay and change the subject.

available;1635530 wrote:
Well lovelies i am going on youtube to figure out how to fix my stuff up with my knitting. i showed mia today and she loves the scarf so i just need to fix it and finish it which would have been done last week if i had not got annoyed with the damn mistake i made.

YouTube is amazing. I swear, you can learn anything you want there, including unknitting, I hope :H! FallenAngel got me interested in Zentangles, which is pretty much meditative doodling: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6h0XuK95omE[/video]]Zentangle's Betweed - YouTube. I've always been a doodler and I struggle with being a very figity meditator, so I'm thinking this might be a good thing - and some of the outcomes are fabulous.

I hope your daughter finds some relief from her anxiety soon, Ava - it's really something how our kids' problems can in many ways hurt worse than our own :l. She's lucky to have a mom who is always there for her now.

Hey, HUMBLE!!! How is Needy Husband doing? Come chat with us if you need a break.

And how are you doing today, Narilly? Have a nice swim last evening?

SL, where are the 6 bottles???

DB, hope your flea market is a Great Success!

LC, I'm sorry your beautiful day turned sour . But you can still end it feeling so good about yourself :l.

Have a great day, NS

[giraffe1234]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi there everyone
LifeChange, I know kids exactly like that - my BFs grandchildren. Brought up like little gods who can do no wrong, and for whose thoughtless and rude behaviour there are no repercussions, no consequences. And the way they treat restaurant staff - it's fecking unspeakable.
Good luck with dealing with you situation, I will think of you! Sometimes it helps to close one's eyes and think positive thoughts, sometimes it's best just to leave the room. But that's easier said than done.
I really liked what you said: [I]I won't drink over it anymore. I won't hurt myself because of them.
Good advice for me as well - thank you.
Good night everyone!

[lifechange]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Thank you for that, Giraffe!:l It helps to have some who understand!
NS, the red A had me laughing out loud!!:H

ok, I am going to get my butt kicked in Pachisi!

will check in again after the girls are in bed. hope you're all having a lovely Sat.

[MossRose]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi all. Just a quick check in. Spending the day watching my grand-puppy. He is so cute. Wish I knew how to post a pic. Anyway, a few mintues ago, it got quiet - TOO quiet - yep, he was into something. Although I had to laugh. It's like having a toddler in the house. Thank God I'm sober, because I can't take my eyes off him for second. LOL.

I want to respond to everyone, but the truth is, I am behind in my reading AGAIN!! So sorry - and I mean that.

But I did read your story LC and wanted respond. I have to admit, I'm a bit shocked. You have been living with your BF and his son for 8 years. This child is only 13, which means you have been in his life since he was around 5. Am I doing the math right? I can only assume it's a "divide and conquer" mentality. That will only work if your BF and the ex allow it (sorry, not trying to throw fuel on the fire). Anyway, I feel bad for you. Since I lived in a step-blended family situation for almost 2 decades (my ex-husband and I married when my sons were very young) , I know it takes a lot of work. But that work is really the responsibility of the adults to remain united. You deserve that respect. Unfortunately, I know many children just like that now - even a few that I'm related too. I have a nephew who was coddled his whole life, treated like a king for no good reason, and now he is a totally inept adult - doesn't work, doesn't drive, doesn't do anything, except mooch off his parents. Scary stuff. So you are absolutely right to be concerned about the future of BF's son. Whew - rant over.

Sorry you are going through this. For some reason, your story really hit a nerve with me. Hang in there.

Hope everyone is doing well. Ava - sorry you daughter is suffering from anxiety. But she has you to guide her, so I know she will be ok.

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi all - managed a good walk this morning - borrowed the ranch (where the girls are riding)'s dog and did a brisk 5 miles - feeling good - got some endorphins buzzing. Started a diet - looking forward to feeling good this summer.
NS - 4 bottles were sent back as undeliverable, they are coming back from the wine club with next months two..and then two more months of this.
LC - I am in the central valley - a place with a really bad rep called Stockton, where I will leave once the girls finish school. They are 13 and 15. I work from the east bay (main office in Oakland) but offices in Fresno and Reno.
I am feeling so good and strong on the AF front - so hoping this is here to stay for a while....
Hi to all Loamers...

[lifechange]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

So while putting the girls to bed, I fell asleep-- So nice to be cuddled by a (still) little and very tired 9 year old! I am very tired so will hit the hay and continue on tomorrow.

Moss, thank you so much for responding! You have given me some things to think about and are no way adding fuel to the fire--I am going to try and put it out of my mind for the time being to sleep, but would love to respond tomorrow and perhaps hear your gut feelings... if you have time--maybe I will pm you so as not to bore the heck out of everyone. I am so bored with this situation and the fact that I haven't yet figured out how to make a change that I could die!!

Hugs to you all and thank you for being part of this wonderful, sober, pre.Spring day!
I have to say I am very grateful this evening!

edit: x post SL-- glad to hear you are feeling so strong!! more tomorrow..

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Loamers, so much to read and i have coffee in hand so all good. Woke up to a beautiful sunny morning but had the weirdest dream. I was with a family (mine apparently) and we were being chased by Germans and i even ended up in a camp but still kept getting rescued by a a man and woman and ended up swimming in a beautiful river with apparently my sister, who i dont have one of. It was one of those dreams that even when i woke up i still went back to exactly the same bit, i went through a lot to get to freedom so maybe it was subconsciously telling me something profound!

LB Mia's anxiety went through the roof when my mother told her she would never amount to anything, she has always been anxious like me but atm she cant work so i like to take her out on the weekend as she feels safe with me. She will get there and we have everything in place but she needs to do the hypnosis etc which she feels will do nothing but i am very persistent when need be though she does not like listening to my wisdom.

Jvo the only people that matter are the ones you love, what every one else thinks is not overly important in your life. I love you as a nutter just the way you are. I try and tell my boys everyday that i love them, getting a cuddle is a bit harder but i love it when they come up to me for a hug.

NS that was so funny, what did you exactly say? was it just months or days included as well? Thanks for my wake up laugh. Did your friend have any idea about your drinking? so many questions. I youtubed undoing fark ups and its called "tinking" so i unpicked and knitted and still stuffed up as cant figure out which pattern row i was on so i unpicked and repeated that process about 4 times, all the while losing my patience but i did it finally and now i have nearly finished so might pop over and get some more wool today and i need to get some wool to knit penguin jumpers for injured penguins to keep warm.

Giraffe lovely to see you checking in. I would want to kill said grandchildren and probably would or just not take the darlings anywhere and tell them precisely why. My kids were wild when we went out as we did not go out much with 4 of them but when we did they got the lecture from hell before we left and if they misbehaved they got it when we were in private. I was a firm believer that a smack never hurt a child in moderation of course and having an ADHD child with behavioural issues was a challenge to say the least.

LC how lovely that you fell asleep with your girl. My girls still sleep with me if they come over without their other halves or in the morning come into bed for a cuddle and kiera is 27 in May. They will always be my babies. Good on you for getting through another trying day by the sounds of it. As soon as i read your post my blood pressure went up. After this amount of time and as you being the caregiver of this obnoxious child then you should set the rules and your bf should be supporting you. I have had step children in my life and they did as i said. i remember having a big argument with one of the mothers about me disciplining her children and i said if they came into my house they had my rules and if she did not like it then keep the children at home. I think the children respected that they had rules when visiting and i loved them dearly and when i broke up from their father i have not seen them since and that was very hard but thats life. I agree with Moss and i hope i have not spoken out of place. It makes me mad that kids, of course not all, have no respect and play on it, one would think he would know better after all this time. I have bricks if you want me to send you one or two.

SL all i read was "i borrowed the childrens ranch and did 5 miles", im thinking what the hell did you do with the borrowed ranch, then i read "dog". Warming up over your way is it? I will be so jealous of you all talking soon about your heat and i will be rugged up but not as rugged up as Nar.

Where are you Nar and Humble?

Well day 99 today and farking nearly finally to trippple. I keep looking at the 100 day thread with anticipation of posting my first short post. This post started out short but i always have an opinion sigh, I need you back Pav but i hope you are having a great time and are preparing for our party.

[NoSugar]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

available;1635759 wrote:
NS that was so funny, what did you exactly say? was it just months or days included as well? Thanks for my wake up laugh. Did your friend have any idea about your drinking? so many questions..

I looked her straight in the eye and said "Thirteen months". Now who the heck ever says thirteen months other than maybe a doting parent regarding the age of their first child. Even my second one was aboutayear for several months... Thank goodness I didn't know the week or day counts!

None of my friends knew I drank too much because I very rarely did in front of anyone. Plus, many of them have similar troubles and drink as much or more as I did. Actually, I think many people do and those of us here are the ones that are admitting that whatever our intake was, it was causing us problems. Like that woman who more than once mentioned to j-vo that there would be wine and fun at the gift bag-stuffing party. People really want others to be drinking, too, and for it to be perceived as a normal, fun thing to do. I had the same experience with book clubs. I don't know if they ever would have got off the ground if wine weren't always served. And half the time we just drank and chatted and barely talked about the books...

By the way, Ava isn't joking about sweaters for penguins : Volunteers sought to knit sweaters for penguins - KGUN9.com

Good to see you, Moss. Don't worry about not reading everything written around here. Not that it isn't quality prose but... you'll be ok if you miss something :H!

Hi, Giraffe! Sorry more of us aren't up and about in your daytime but good to hear you are doing well.

Sounds like you had good days, LC and SL! Hope Pav is having a great time with her friends and not feeling left out. At least when she comes back here she'll be the center of the In Crowd on her 100th day AF.

Later - NS

[Dottie Belle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hello ladies,
Long day but the flea market was a huge success...I think folks were glad to get out of the house and needed some shopping therapy...but my back hurts from standing and having to be there so long..but now i am off the hook until next year...I did a really good job if I do say so myself!!

[lifechange]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

And a very good morning to you!!

Ava, day 99!!!!! :h and on a Sunday. Lovely... That dream sounds amazing and very profound. I'm envious-- I haven't had one of those for quite some time. Enjoy your freedom beautiful lady. I am so happy to have you here in my life! I am a bit worried about your knitting mistakes, though. Maybe I shouldn't count on that yellow bikini I was hoping for for my 100 day gift!:H Not unless you figure it out soon... Let's see how it goes with the penguin sweaters. I looked at the link NS posted. CUTE! Poor little penguins, though. We think we have problems, eh?! I hope you are having a wonderful day...

SL, I don't know Stockton, but I believe you if you say it isn't so great! And you are from Scottland, aren't you? Have you been in the States for a very long time? At least you have a ranch where your girls can go riding! And a dog you can borrow to go for a nice run! I love horses and would give a lot to have the opportunity to spend more time riding. Preferably western style trail riding in AZ! Oh well. One of those things I have to accept that I can't change for now!

I had such a hard time falling back to sleep last night. I did some concentrated breathing and lots of repetitions of the serenity prayer-- it must have all worked at some point. My goal today is to stay present, not too far in the past or future. I will try not to make any huge, life changing decisions today-- instead I will enjoy the kids and the beautiful weather. They go to their dad's tomorrow for a week (we alternate weeks) so I will have time to think about all the other crap then.

Hope you all have a very peaceful, happy Sunday---
I will probably be here often. Just have a feeling..

[lifechange]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

And a very good morning to you!!

Ava, day 99!!!!! :h and on a Sunday. Lovely... That dream sounds amazing and very profound. I'm envious-- I haven't had one of those for quite some time. Enjoy your freedom beautiful lady. I am so happy to have you here in my life! I am a bit worried about your knitting mistakes, though. Maybe I shouldn't count on that yellow bikini I was hoping for for my 100 day gift!:H Not unless you figure it out soon... Let's see how it goes with the penguin sweaters. I looked at the link NS posted. CUTE! Poor little penguins, though. We think we have problems, eh?! I hope you are having a wonderful day...

SL, I don't know Stockton, but I believe you if you say it isn't so great! And you are from Scottland, aren't you? Have you been in the States for a very long time? At least you have a ranch where your girls can go riding! And a dog you can borrow to go for a nice run! I love horses and would give a lot to have the opportunity to spend more time riding. Preferably western style trail riding in AZ! Oh well. One of those things I have to accept that I can't change for now!

I had such a hard time falling back to sleep last night. I did some concentrated breathing and lots of repetitions of the serenity prayer-- it must have all worked at some point. My goal today is to stay present, not too far in the past or future. I will try not to make any huge, life changing decisions today-- instead I will enjoy the kids and the beautiful weather. They go to their dad's tomorrow for a week (we alternate weeks) so I will have time to think about all the other crap then.

Hope you all have a very peaceful, happy Sunday---
I will probably be here often. Just have a feeling..

[daisy45]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hey ladies, sneaking back in after going AWOL! Tryingto gather up enough determination to go again and make it last.............

[lifechange]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

hi Daisy! I am so happy to see you here again. Gather up your courage, your determination. Just get through THIS one day! You know how-- You can do it!!!:l

[lifechange]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Daisy, I know how hard it is to get back in there. I have just made it to day 4 again and am feeling positive. I think it is so important (and very difficult) in the first days to stay in the moment as much as possible so as not to become too overwhelmed. It has helped me to try not to think too much, to just do it-- and to reach out to as many people as possible as a lifeline-- Reach out for help to those you trust! Do whatever you have to do.:h