Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Way to go Jane and J-Vo! Wow, you gals are doing so well.
Keep up the good work!

Jane, I read your HUGE post and holy smokes, you have been through the ringer! I have not had to deal with anything like that in my life. Your sister sounds like a very selfish person for sure. Don't let her sh-- drag you down. You are a strong, positive woman. Thank you for sharing. Onward and upward right?!

That movie you mentioned sounded really interesting too. I will look for that.
I watched the new movie with Leonardo deCaprio "Wolf on Wall Street". It was a bit much. The story was interesting but seriously, I didn't want to watch a porn movie!
I was in that business for about 10 years and so I could relate to some of the stuff. Alot of AL and drug abuse in that movie for sure.

J-Vo, Pav, you girls are so busy with younger kids playing sports. Such a good way to keep busy and away from AL for sure.

Life, I'll be over for some peach cheesecake!

Ava, sounds like you are doing well in Thailand. glad you are finding time to post. Wow, your brother sounds like he was a piece of work! Makes me appreciate my brother a little bit more for sure. Thank you for that. Sometimes we don't realize how lucky we are.

No hangover today. Was up early for breakkie.

My daughter is going to Europe for 50 days with a few other kids. It is kind of scary but she is a very mature smart kid. I don't 'over parent' her so she can actually make her own decisions. Some of the other kids have helicopter parents and they don't let their kids make any decisions or do things by themselves. It really takes away their ability to make their own choices and be confident in their decisions. Unbelievable.

Anyway, no hangover here. Feeling great.

Talk to you soon.

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

TMH, I think my drinking problem is like yours. The 75% time is great but the 25% time really sucks and then I think my ratio starts to change. More like 60% good and then 40% bad. I was so sick of the hangovers. It was time to change. I have been AL free except for about 10 occasions since Nov 1, 2013 and have had 1 hangover which sucked but was a good reminder.

I think eventually I will totally eliminate AL from my life. I am getting there. Talking to all you beautiful ladies everyday helps. AL causes so much destruction in all our lives. When I feel like drinking, I come and post here and read, that really helps for sure.

Hi ya Roxane!

SL, I do not Ever think you are being Selfish xo

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

The only way out is through

That is good Jane!

[NoSugar]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Finally home !

As I was never an over-indulger in a group, I don't have any of those personal stories but last night I realized that a glass or two of wine helped make the behavior of others more bearable. I watched people I don't really know deteriorate in front of me to the point of being nonfunctional. While it made me glad that I -and all of you- are getting away from this, it made me very sad about the state of the world. I felt like I was in a room full of desperately unhappy people pretending to have fun. And no one really was.

So glad you came back, Roxy. I hope you stay and post away until you get this done.

Narilly, I read your post at first as suggesting that you had worked in the porn industry for 10 years :H. It sounds like AL is still making an appearance in your life these days once in awhile but you've managed to wrestle control and avoid the hangovers. Is that right or am I reading too much in to your words? That is good but I hope you get to the point of not needing to even have the conflict at all - the peace of mind you can have is something I wish for all of us. Your stats over the last several months show that you've made amazing progress and I'm really happy for you.

SL, your advice to TMH of not setting an AF end-date is a good one. It would be hard to change your thinking in the way it needs to be changed to succeed if you're preoccupied with getting to the day you can finally drink. All that takes is will-power for a set amount of time. Becoming sober involves so much more than will-power ever can achieve. I hope you take this week a day at a time, TMH, and each day, including the day of the dance, ask yourself what truly will be improved by drinking.

Jane, to subscribe, I just clicked the link on the left side of the screen and worked through the windows. You sign in with your MWO name and password and then I put in Credit Card information. The class I go to at the gym is Spinning.

Hi to the other Loamers! Hope all is well :l.

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

NS, ok just to be clear, I was in the Financial industry not the Porn industry AND yes, AL has made an appearance in my life but I drink about 95% less than I did before.
haha! that was funny though about the porn industry, I have to be careful what I write!

I have drank a few times but was usually under super controlled circumstances. I am not trying to moderate. I am aiming to be completely AL free. I am working on it NS and thank you for the encouragement!.

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

MAE Ladies,

Wow, what a productive weekend! I can't remember the last time I had one and felt great about it.

Regarding the PAWS and articles that Pav posted, I started reading the first and began to get anxious. I think you all know about my severe social anxiety history, and one of the articles stated this about the symptoms regarding anxiety:

People become more anxious and less resilient, and anxiety is experienced as fear, uncertainty, a greater sense of rejection.

This is where I got anxious, as this has been one of my biggest problems with social anxiety...being rejected, embarrassed. Will I ever get a hold of this shit? That kind of scares me in a way, but then I feel stronger than ever. I feel as though I've worked through a lot of my 'crap' since October, with some slips. Frankly, I don't know what to think of that. It's just something else that I can worry about and I don't want to right now. So I'm going to put that worry away for now. I'm on my journey and I have lots of tools I will use ODAT.

SL, I understand you concern about being discovered on a professional level for sure. I don't think it would be the same in my position, but in yours, I can see your point. Keep up the good work SL! :l

Giraffe, you're getting through PAWS! Good for you and hang in there.

TMH, good advice is always given here! Please stop in and chat anytime. We've all come such a long way and are continuing to move in the right direction.

Roxy, great to see you and rant or do whatever it takes to stay AF!

Nar, the opportunities kids have nowadays is great, isn't it! All of my cousins kids have gotten to study or take trips abroad. I hope my DS gets to do the same someday. And I agree about kids making their own choices.

NS, I read Nar's post that way, too. Good thing we were wrong, but hey, I'd love Nar even if she were in the porn business!

Have a great night ladies.

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Today is turning out better than it started.
And then joy of knowing a real porn star:H Hi Nar, good to see you:l
Had to run to target on way back with one girl, ended up with clothes shopping for both - how did that happen But on way, saw that a strawberry stand was open - got three packs and they smell fabulous! Also three bunches of sweetpeas - and they smell like home Dropped one bunch off on the doorstep of a neighbour - it was Bryd who writes about doing things for others as part of her recovery...felt nice, and girls loved doing it.
j-vo, I have avoided reading about PAWS - there was a lot of discussion about it a while back, and I am scared if I read too much it could become a self-fullfilling prophecy - I don't wish to know that this journey could become more difficult - I am trying to chose to live in the moment.
Nar - I don't recall how old your daughter is? My 15year old is off to Washington a week on Monday - feels as if she is growing up - it was day camp, then a close overnight camp, then a car rides away - now a plane, but she is on the same land mass.
Smiling again today - this no drinking thing is working:H

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

You're so right SL and for me, it's not good for me to read those things that produce more anxiety for me. You're sounding so awesome my friend!

Nar...anties: you forgot these! Love ya!

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

:thumbysup::thumbysup::thumbysup: J-vo:yougo:
You are doing so well too - don't put more obstacles in your way:l

[Icanwithoutacan]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Just sayin goodnight ..... Going to start posting more in loamers

[little beagle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Narilly NS beat me to it. I was going to ask if you were in the porn industry.:H
Ava I am sorry you never got to resolve things with your brother. :l
we look forward to seeing more of you Ican.
I am doing a short post tonight. I am SO tired. Hubby and I have been practicing our communication skills this weekend. Actually talking about things instead of just fighting. Al never made anything in my life better. Being sober is making things better finally. It is starting to feel like we are getting somewhere.

[Running4life]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi Ladies:
Just a quick check in. Day 4 for me and feeling great. Tired from my 50 km bike ride this morning so will post more tomorrow. Going to bed early. It was nice to get up and have the energy to enjoy the beautiful weather and scenery on the ride.
Take care all,
R4L

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

You girls crack me up! Hee hee! Porn Star

Nice to hear more from you Ican.

J-Vo, you seem so confident. I would never guess that you had any kind of social anxiety. I am glad you are taking time to breathe. I try and breathe deep and listen to my heart beat. That relaxes me.

LB, my hubs and I used to fight so much more when I was drinking. He has cut down his drinking a lot too. He drinks about 80% less now. It was something we did together all the time. We get along so much better now. Funny, we went to Counselling to figure out how to deal with our fighting. Never would we have admitted it was because of drinking.
That's the kind of control it can have on a person. We were in such denial.

Anyway, it's late here so Goodnight sweet ladies.
Xo

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

R4L, 50 kms?? No wonder your avitar looks so tired!

[Pavati]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi, Everyone:

Sorry if I made you worry with the PAWS article.

J-vo it seems many people's drinking slips are all around 3 - 6 months in, and if you read the article you can see that is when PAWS is supposed to start. For me the knowledge of it is freeing - you can feel like that and work through it with the knowledge of what it is and the understanding that it will go away. I think I said this already, but when I was 18 I started getting panic attacks, and when I went to see a psychiatrist he read me the description of a panic attack out of the DSM. It was so great to hear that what I was feeling was so common that it was described in a book. NS said she started feeling blah around 90 days (or four month?) - could have been PAWS. I'm sorry if I worried you (and you, too, SL) with the post - it was meant to bring comfort. ANYWAY - congratulations on your LAST first week ever. :l

WAY TO GO JANE! 90 is amazing. Doesn't it feel great??

Nar - I'm glad you left the porn industry to do something decent. Good to hear from you and good to hear that you're doing well.

TMH - SL had some great advice. I think most moderation sites say that you should go 30 days without alcohol to get a good perspective on your use, and if that is hard it might be a message you should listen to. Actually, I know most moderation sites say that, because all of my Internet searching until now has been with the sole purpose of becoming a moderate drinker. Oops. Too late. I hope you find peace, whatever you choose.

R4L - Only 50K? Slacker! :H I'm glad you feel so good.

All you other loamers - good night. I am hitting the hay.

xo
Pav

Just x posted, Nar!