Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

:question2:I'm trying to focus on the topic here. Is it "what made us realize that drinking isn't right for us?" Or "what works for us? or how did we unlock the chains that were wrapped around us?"

My mind is dead right now. Is that the topic?

Going to catch a little of The Anonymous People. Finally was able to rent it.

[NoSugar]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

CONGRATULATIONS ON 90 DAYS, MARYLOU!!!

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Morning loamers and Moamer (mr G nice to see you here)

Not much to say, still feeling like crap and not happy that the sun is shining and all i want to do is stay in bed. If i could cut off my head i would feel fine but......... bit extreme.

Rox i just dont think! ha ha. I dont read up on the science of drinking and what made me an alkie. Pouring al down my throat made me that. I know my past had a lot to do with it but letting that go at a rapid rate of knots, I dont have a diary, a list, a journal. I dont like to overthink as then i get stressed so not drinking is something i just dont do. I try and get enough sleep, eat reasonably well, ummm talk about exercise later and do what "normal" people do. I do make myself accountable by being on here daily but i try not to over-read either as then that makes my brain think that maybe i am being too blaise about not drinking and i will fail.

Yesterday i was sick and bored and my brain said "have a drink", it was a floating notion all day, as someone said now the excitement of the holiday is over i will come home to what? Everyday life yet again, not much excitement in that i must say. There was vodka, beer and bourbon in the fridge and that is where it stayed and that is where it will stay. I just do not drink!

Jvo drinking to excess is never good for anyone and some people recognise that fact and act on it and others dont until it is too late, like my brother. I didnt for years until my health and blackouts became an everyday part of life. I think I will always be chained to al in some way but its my choice to keep al locked up and put away. Maybe the question is why is stopping al easier for some than others, why do some get those horrendous cravings/urges that take us back to drink where others can control it.

Just babbling on as usual and need another cup of tea and i am going to set my mind to doing three things today. One is take poppy to get groomed and hopefully get maddy done too, unpack my damn suitcase and clean my kitchen to sparkling brilliance. Will keep you informed on how that goes! Drugs are good!

Now thats a story - when tye was little he came into my room one night and said "mummy i dont feel well" and i am 99% sure i was still drunk or hangover stage and i told him to "have some drugs, drugs are good". well that is a running joke in this family 15 years later especially when they smoke pot!.

later lovelies and mannie, have a great day. Mr G, stalking is just fine!

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Mary 90 days big hugs and smooches and congrats girl. 90 days feels the best! You deserve every smile that is on your dial today!

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Halfway through The Anonymous People and taking notes. I still love to take notes in the "old fashioned" way with paper and pencil! Am planted happily on my couch tonight and not moving an inch until I get clothes ironed and lunch made for tomorrow. In a funk, so tired today. I'm feeling a bit guilty thinking I should get on treadmill as DS's baseball game was cancelled due to rain, but can't seem to budge.

As I'm watching this, I was thinking...yep. They talk about the anonymity and how this has created a shameful idea of what the "disease" actually is. People still believe it's a moral failure, even with the scientific evidence of it being a chronic disease of the brain. We don't have proper health care. Only 2 percent is "preventative" care for alcoholism and 98 percent is cleaning up the mess from the addiction. How sad is that.

I wonder if we'll see a change in the direction of this negative during our lifetime or not. I see small steps being taken, but overall, how long will it take? And media is to blame also for negative portrayal of addicts and alcoholics such as Whitney Houston. They sensationalize and embellish stories to get the attention. So famous people who are alcoholics are tabloid fodder and puts the disease in a negative light. It sucks but it's true.

Anyhow, Roxy, every individual is different and everyone's needs are different. It's about finding what clicks with you. I think there are similarities in people's plans including posting daily about what you're feelings as others can help you through them. Also, posting to help others. Just like NS has in her signature line, "recovery is contagious and recovery is spread through recovery carriers." Reading and posting are a really important factor and so many successes here at MWO do just that. The toolbox is a great read. What has made a difference in me is the spiritual factor. I pray lots and lots, and I've opened up my eyes and ears to the Big Guy upstairs. It gives me great peace and I'm not questioning where the peace came because I know. That may not be your thing though. Search for it, Roxy. You'll find it.

Oops. Too late to get on my treadmill. Damn!

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Marylou,
Congrats on 90!!!! Wow! Another success. Three months later, how do you feel? Speech!

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Congratulations Marylou! Yippee!!! 90 days! xo

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Give me strength to deal with a hormonal teenager, who is failing school, more interested in her boyfriend than her F's and is breaking the agreements we have - this is breaking my heart - I am going between being scared and being mad.....:upset:

[little beagle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

SL :l being a mother is difficult. I went through very much the same thing with my daughter. How do you fail gym? Never figured that out. She grew up. Did not drink or do drugs, get pregnant. Did not graduate, but runs a successful small business. I count that a success. She chose her own path.
J-vo take it easy. You deserve it.
Narilly I agree. Enjoy life. I quit drinking because I wasn't. I am having a better time now.
NS I love your posts. Look so forward to reading them.
Jane have a good night.
Roxy it is nice to hear you are still with us.
Marylou :wave: 90 days is wonderful.

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

LB - this is exactly what I needed to hear - your daughter is a success, that is what I hope for my daughter. I would love her to go to college, but more than anything I want her to be happy. Jane - I was trying to tell her three years now for 45 plus years working - a job she likes and has fun at will be such a better life than 45 yrs working at MacDonalds! I want to help her to succeed, and I can, but she has to want the help, and right now it is way down on her list of priorities!

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

SL, I wish I could help you. Your daughter knows you are there for her.she might just be taking longer to mature than you would expect.

I was like that. I got into all sorts of trouble, got kicked out of school, drank too much. My parents never gave up on me. I was 22 before I really grew up. I finished my degree and got married. My parents greatly influenced me, they were there for me.
Somewhere in the back of her mind all those things you are teaching her are there. I know it's tough to see your kid waste their life/time though.

Ava, get better girl!

Pav, are we going to cross post?

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Nar - thank you!:l

[Pavati]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Evening, Loamers:

G – always good to have a Moam stop by, especially a music-playing, beach running, mystical Moam.

SL – That photo sounds lovely. I like NS’s idea (how many times have I typed THOSE words??) of using it to remember the good parts of your sobriety. Good on you for getting it for yourself. If it makes you feel any better, my sister was a crazy hellion teenager who dropped out of high school, two colleges, lived with a drug dealer, and now is a teacher and soccer mom in a rural community with a master’s degree. Mostly they get through it, especially with rock star moms such as yourself…

LB – Missized! That made me laugh out loud. THAT has been my problem…

Nar – Thanks for the kid info. You’ll hear more about my kids, I’m sure. Sorry about the former client. Living life now IS important – a good reminder. You’re lucky that your DH is an exerciser – that would give me more motivation (and of course he drives you crazy in other ways – that’s what they’re there for!) I’m sure I NEVER drive my DH crazy…

J-Vo – Sorry for your friend. That is so sad. Sorry you’re not feeling well – take good care of yourself.

Roxy – No thread killer. Just asking – are you drinking? The reason I am asking is that when I quit I found that I don’t tie myself in knots nearly as much – I would have described it as overly analytical (analyzing every last detail). Maybe after some sober time you’ll get more clarity. I followed NS’s approach to quitting drinking, so I guess I was analytical in that as well… Post anything, any time – that’s why we’re here…

Ava – I don’t get it either. I would think to myself, “I’ve had enough, one more will just make me feel crappy tomorrow, I don’t NEED any more, I won’t be able to sleep,” all the while pouring out another drink. It really makes NO sense to my logical mind – why wasn’t the nice, pleasant relaxation of one drink enough? Why didn’t I say – oh, no, I’m losing control of my body and mind – time to stop? The science is there, but it still makes no sense to me.

Marylou – CONGRATULATIONS on 90 days! What a great milestone. I was so excited. I hope you are doing well and recovering from your loss.

J-Vo – Cool that you’re watching that doco. I’d like to see it soon. I actually think that celebrities who live public, happy, sober lives CAN help (like Kristen Johnson from the movie). It feels to me as if there is a change happening in attitudes – that’s why a movie like that can even be made. Maybe you could watch the movie from the treadmill??

LB – Love your daughter’s story as well. Another rock star mom!

NS – I love your thoughtful posts, and how you somehow always find just the right thing to say. I’m so happy you’re here for me and with us!

I had a good therapy appointment today – I mostly talked about avoiding relapse by focusing on staying sober, no matter how strong or happy I feel. Alky posted on another thread that he doesn’t even want to be drunk – that being drunk sounds awful. I have to agree, and right at this moment I feel like even a nice “buzz” would feel like crap. That makes me feel secure in being sober, but after hearing about One Crafty Mother’s relapse (she was drinking vanilla extract FFS) after 4 years, I know to avoid complacency.

Anyway – Good night, loamers. Great to be here with you.

Xo
Pav

[Running4life]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi Ladies
I am back but feeling a bit sheepish. I succumbed again and it took me a few days to come to my senses.
Day one again and got the Antabuse into me. Just need to have the courage to take it every day.
Will take it in the morning before all the drinking thoughts set in.
Alcohol and exercise don't go well together. I had a few drinks last night while visiting friends for dinner.
This morning's early workout was not the most pleasant but I got through it. I don't want to feel like that.
I have a half marathon coming up in a couple of weeks, a 250 km bike ride in June to train for and I have signed up for my first Marathon in December. I don't think I will be able to do these things if I keep drinking. It is counter productive, so I am back again with my tail between my legs.
I am inspired by the progress you have all made and I am hoping to draw some courage from it.
Thanks for the support.
R4L

[roxane]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

R4L hi.

you have two things to aim for. well, three really.

ye,s im drinking. keep having day ones. thats why im tying myself in knots. i know all the theory, logically and emotionally. cant put it into practice for some reason. i have the attitude of not wanting to drink, hate it in fact. i like being sober.

.................. i dont know............