Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

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Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

I for one never lost my faith in you Jvo that you would not succeed eventually and you have proven that it can be totally done with dignity and strength and determination.

Hey NS what you talking about. Ranting and Raving, yep, definitely for sure and it needs to be said as i think the newbies are not posting in the right places at the moment. Honest and true. they need help from the "been there done that mwoers" and to be around the success stories to realise that it can be done and its not ok to fail time and time again. We can only try our best to help but at the end of the day unless we are dedicated in having an af life, it is going to be an uphill battle to win.

i am not at work today and feeling blah but going to make a coffee and post something that has really gotten up my nasal passages in the last few days. I was mad now i am determined to prove this said "friend" wrong.

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

mmm don't know about you being a drug and alcohol counsellor.. though i suppose it would keep you on the straight and narrow.

This was the first comment in an email from the friend who is with my ex and who gave up drinking due to me stopping drinking. I let this one go as everyone is allowed their own opinion. i did not ask why she thought this as one of her comments to put me down which she tries to do constantly as she has always been jealous of me. No reason to be jealous of me i am afraid. I dont need to do a course to keep on the straight and narrow.

linda, while i agree that you don't need anything to keep you on the straight and narrow, i could go back and find all your stop smoking emails where you were never ever ever going to smoke again. no way it was too hard. never again.
so ..
I think a bit longer than .. I don't know how many months you are now. but not a lot really. you tell me all the time about your friends on Mwo who drink after 1 year, 3 years, 10 years. and then back to square one so i think maybe five months is a bit early .. not being hard just being realistic.

She does know how many months i am now, she decided to try and be tactical, whereas this comment made me as mad as hell. the protective me was so pissed about talking about my mwo friends like she did, insinuating that i will fail. Telling me i have said so many times i have given up smoking and failed, i wont mention the amount of times she has given up smoking and smoked again. she has now stopped drinking and smoking for three months with no support so she is a martyr. i am waiting for her to fail, my ex enables her and will wear her down. he may not, i hope so for her sake but i am sick of her negativity in my life, so she has to go.

Am i taking this way to personally, i dont know but when i was drinking i would have thought "yes you are right, i am a failure, i will fail, its only a matter of time". Now i think "fuck you sunshine, i will show you that i am so much better than what you think, i will prove you wrong". you can keep having my leftovers in life and be unhappy but i for one will never ever be like you.

I have a lfong history with this girl, known her since 11, she was abused by her brother at an early age, nearly left her 2 year old son with me when i was 18 as she could not cope (i knew nothing about that one), morbidly obese, stomach stapling (failed, you dont lose weight if you dont put in an effort), the son she was going to leave with me has wiped her from her life and her 2 grandchildren, she has mental issues and is with my ex husband who does not work and is exactly like what he was when he was with me and is starting to get some serious health issues due to her weight. Now have i ever done anything but support her, do i mention her weight to make her feel worse than what i know she does. No i dont, i am not vindictive, i am not cruel, mind you i sound so bitchy on here but i am over this shit that i have put up with daily. I was so angry last night, after 30+ years i am over it. I dont know, am i being touchy, is it a stage of this journey that my tolerance level is down and should i just keep going with what i have been doing for years or should i tell her what i really think and probably hurt her which is not me.

oh well that is all for now.

hugs nar on your 30 days, no sloppy kisses, i seem to have passed on my lergy.

xxx

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

You want what I would do in my mind or what I would actually do? I'll give you both...

What I would do in my mind is bitch-slap her to hell and back. Tell her she's a piece of shit that doesn't know anything. BUT... then I think, anyone in their right mind, a mind that is working properly, functioning well, is at peace, happy, and loves themselves would not type that to a long-time friend, because she is hurting for herself, for her life, and the pain that she is going through. What she has said to you is what she is saying to herself. That she's a failure. So...what I would actually do, and you may think I'm a bit crazy, but yes, I know I am, is pray for her, because she is hurting so much. I started praying for people that have not been nice to me in the past, and slowly, I see that they have their own pains and issues they are dealing with. So praying for them to get through their stuff is what helps me. I'm not saying this will make you girls best of friends, but it will give you peace of mind as you decide to move on from her and only wish her well. Sometimes we need to put our past and the people in it behind us if it causes us unwanted stress and hurt. Ava, you don't deserve hurt, you are healing yourself along with us, and we love you. We are here for you, albeit across the freaking world, but here, nonetheless. You're a strong woman, and I want you as a friend because you have so much sense, knowledge, determination, and strength. You're a wonderful mum and a dear friend. So that's how I'd handle the situation. Give it to God. Love you.

[little beagle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Narilly you are wonderful. Congratulations day 30. Get yourself a special reward. New shoes, perfume, something you would normally not get. Celebrate. You deserve it.

[Dottie Belle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Evening ladies,
Laundry today so exciting.
We have 2 trips planned for the summer. Both visiting dh's family. Not my favorite thing but they are his kids so that is what I signed up for. Driving the car on one and taking the RV on the other. Maybe we can stay at some state or national parks with the RV. Trips are not fully planned yet. I am going to take my tablet so I can stay in touch. Laptop has way too much personal info on it to take on a trip. Plan to set up tablet before we leave. First one is scheduled for the middle of June.
Gym tomorrow then taking dh to a chiropractor to check out the back spasms he has been having. Getting old sucks but does beat the alternative..;-))

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Dottie, throw in a load for me!

Speaking of loads...Jane, that was hilarious and j-Vo too.

Hey Ava, you do know that it is all about her right? All that stuff she said is about herself it's not about you at all.
She can say what she wants but it is your choice whether you want to own that anger/guilt/frustration or whatever you are feeling.
WE have faith in you and more importantly YOU have faith in yourself. Move on girlie, it may be time to weed your garden. Your 'friend' sounds like a weed.

Lil B, I got a haircut today. Thanks for the nice words.
J-Vo, Jane, Ava, you gals too. Love you all very much. Honestly, this is one of the best things I have, my friendships here.

Xo

I will add my date too!

[Pavati]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi, all:

Ava - what color brick do you want for your friend? Hah, Fuck you, Sunshine is my new motto. I'd put it in my signature line but I might scare off some Newbies...

I understand why you are upset, but I vote for the J-Vo route. I don't pray, but I try to forgive. I try to understand where people who are like that come from - in this case I think it must be extreme jealousy. You are attractive, cool, sober, connected with your kids, smart, funny, kind and focused. From your description she appears to be none of the above. You and your behavior are scaring her. Rise above and move on - forgiving doesn't mean you have to be besties, it just means her behavior can't harm you.

Miss Nar! 30 days and onward. You are such a bright spot here - you sound so great. So excited that you have taken Mr. AL OFF the table. Whoot.

J-Vo - Way to go with the attitude - love your sparkly new signature.

Jane - I think for me that animated feeling comes and goes. I remember being super clear and extremely excited about 100 days. I like to believe I am a good driver, but I remember that I have been in a few fender benders. One during the Thanksgiving massacre weekend on a terrible hangover. So awful to remember that!

LB - nice moves.

NS, Dot, everyone - so happy to be here with you all.

xo
Pav

[roxane]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

hi all

have to respond to avas post.

its not about you ava, shes trying to make it about you, but it isnt.

its called deflection. she has all those feelings about herself and has dumped them onto you. so she doesnt have to deal with it.

youre taking it personally? of course! you were meant to! she believes shes telling it how it is, shes just telling the wrong person.

its not you to be vindictive or cruel, so dont be. it wont make you feel better.

mentally bitch slap her and know that is not a happy person and its not for you to try and make her so. fuck 'er.

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Thanks guys for you input, i needed to get my head around it and yes she is the needy one with the fucked life. I just need to make a note to myself to not say anything that she will intentionally put me down for although i am a better person than her so i will be civil. I normally dont reply to her barbs but this one got me big time but now i will just ignore it and proceed to not give her any information about my goings on. Or maybe i will just tell her how happy i am and how great my life is just to piss her off more.

I very much appreciate my loamers xxxx

[roxane]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

thats the spirit!

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Oh, Ava, we're growing up now! We're doing the mature, adult thing, dealing with problems and people the way we were meant to. Not getting caught up in other's problems, taking blame when we shouldn't, because now we care for ourselves, and have a better understanding of others. What a relief to have gotten to this point! And it ain't over yet! We still have lots more learning and appreciation ahead of us.

DB, your trips sound cool! Will you be driving lots? Yes, take the tablet, for sure. I don't leave home without mine, ever, even if I'm going to the store. What if I break down and I have to message you girls!!!!

LB, how are you doing today? Let me know.

Roxy, great to see you post.

Have a super-duper day.

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Ava, way to go! Its good you got your anger out here first before you went and "bitch slapped" her like Rox said!
Pav, yes it is awesome to have made the decision to take AL off the table and live a sober 'clean' life. I can't believe all the fruits and veggies I am eating now. This clean living is amazing.
I think I will feel really good after 90 days sobriety as my brain and body heal from the poison I have been pouring down my throat for about 38 years.
I am a good driver This weekend I am driving up north to visit my cousins who I have always drank with. I am going to tell them that I am not drinking anymore since I turned 50. I want to live the rest of my life AL free and that is what I am gonna do. I am the oldest cousin in my extended family. The closest in age is 4 years younger than me and some of them are 20 years younger SO I will set a good example now for all my crazy cousins. Many of them love to drink and I see signs in a few of them of trouble with AL. I have always been the rebel in my family, mostly because I was the oldest but now it is time to set a good example instead of a bad one.
I have added a few lines to my signature J-Vo, Jane! I will take a couple off later.
xo

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Jane, I just have to say that I love your writing. Have you ever thought of doing that professionally? You have a way with words chickie!
Thank you for all your encouragement I appreciate it more than you know- actually you probably do know!

Check out my signature, I spiffed it up.

[roxane]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

narilly;1661056 wrote: Ava, way to go! Its good you got your anger out here first before you went and "bitch slapped" her like Rox said!
Pav, yes it is awesome to have made the decision to take AL off the table and live a sober 'clean' life. I can't believe all the fruits and veggies I am eating now. This clean living is amazing.
I think I will feel really good after 90 days sobriety as my brain and body heal from the poison I have been pouring down my throat for about 38 years.
I am a good driver This weekend I am driving up north to visit my cousins who I have always drank with. I am going to tell them that I am not drinking anymore since I turned 50. I want to live the rest of my life AL free and that is what I am gonna do. I am the oldest cousin in my extended family. The closest in age is 4 years younger than me and some of them are 20 years younger SO I will set a good example now for all my crazy cousins. Many of them love to drink and I see signs in a few of them of trouble with AL. I have always been the rebel in my family, mostly because I was the oldest but now it is time to set a good example instead of a bad one.
I have added a few lines to my signature J-Vo, Jane! I will take a couple off later.
xo

bitch slap is courtesy of j-vo. i just repeated it.

and keep them on, theyre good to see

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

J-Vo- OF COURSE you said "bitch slapped" ha ha ha!

Its a handy phrase to use in certain occasions !