Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[HumbleRider]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

What in the Sam Hill? My brother got us a huge bottle of Crown Royal for Christmas. Oh boy, now we have two bottles of sweet wine and one of whiskey in the house. On any other day after Christmas, I'd probably have already downed a couple of shots (it's 7 in the morning) figuring hey, it's Boxing Day, who cares that we don't celebrate that holiday here, I do!

I didn't drink and I'm not a drinker. I had a dull ache for a moment when I opened the gift that I wasn't 'normal' and couldn't enjoy it, but I acted as if it were a wonderful gift. My brother quit drinking 12 years ago, so we didn't feel obligated to open it up and start chugging. No one else was drinking either.

SL, the nearest Trader Joes is a half hour away, but I'm hoping we get one soon.

Ava, I can't imagine what I would have done if my son had made it to marriage and spent Christmases with his wife's family. I would be so hurt. My mom used to get upset with me when I would split Christmas Day with my family and the in-laws. It wasn't pleasant. Good thing you don't drink. For Christmas, I got some pearl earrings, beautiful marble coasters with the imprint of Bellingham Bay (where son died), fighting Illini (u of Illinois) sweatshirt from my student who goes there, sweater, Victorias Secret underwear, beautiful pottery from Korea, love, etc, a good haul.

Dottie I hope you treat yourself to something nice. Eloise I love my walks with the dogs too. They make me laugh out loud, they love their outings so much. Pav, skating sounds so much fun and 24 days, yay!

J-vo, your aunt's 60th, ouch. What is weird about my brother getting me the Crown Royal is that one Christmas about 15 years ago, I had so much whiskey that I ended up blacking out and yelling at everyone, including my son, saying that he smoked pot so he had no room to talk when it came to my drinking. I passed out in the bedroom for a couple of hours, then woke up ashamed and drove us home. No one said anything and I remember thinking as I got in the car, "How unfortunate, but I'm not quitting drinking." How awful.

Okay enough self flagellation. NS and all, I did not drink yesterday since I'm not a drinker. No hangover on a Boxing Day. Thanks you guys.

[Dottie Belle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Sun is out but cold here. We are going out later with friends. Haven't decided what I will buy myself but it will be nice. Dh doesn't get it and I am just going to ignore it for now. But it does make me mad and hurt but I wont drink at it or because of it...not worth it..
His kids did call and his grandsons want to come visit this summer..dh wanted the one to stay all summer and I said NO. I dont want my whole summer take up like that and I am also not cooking for them either. If they want to visit for a week that is all I can take...because I know who will do all the work....anyway I will believe that when I see it anyway...empty promises....
Happy day after Christmas!!

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi all, feeling so good this morning!
Quick check in before we head off for our mini vacation.
Pav - do you live in SF?? Do I have a close by compadre?
I will have my phone, but hate checking in on that so may be absent for a few days. Stay strong all, I am looking forward to strong ladies on a mission carrying us thru an amazing 2014!

[lclem]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Humble

Checking out this thread as you suggested. Looks like a great place to visit. Curious about the U of I sweatshirt as that is where my daughter attends school. Strange, as I have been talking about her quite a bit. She started last year after taking the second half of the senior year off. We had mixed opinions as to whether or not she would be able to handle it. She started with a lighter load, had her own room, got aide from disabled services, and made it through the year! Now she is a sophomore and still doing fine. Thinking about her recovery should remind me that much is possible living one day at a time, we certainly did this with her. We kept hope alive, expectations low, and believed that each day she would get better and stronger. I believe we can do this with alcohol too. I want to keep my expectations high, but maybe just embrace the idea of just not being so hard on ourselves as we go through this process.

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

MAE ladies and I IC welcome over here. Just having my first cuppa and having a read and check in to see what you lovelies have been up to.

El we all have so much to be grateful for and al is not one of them, if we can only get that thought out of our heads. It still flashes into mine that i could reward myself, i deserve a wine. The last thing i deserve is a wine or 20. Can you come and walk my dog? I still need to get motivated but i am spring cleaning my house.

SL i hope you have a lovely mini break, most needed after the madness of xmas. Glad you ex did not spoil xmas for your girls. I am lucky I get on very well with my ex. We would probably still be together if he had of got his shit together but after 17 years that did not happen.

Pav hope you slept well. Xmas is so exhausting but the good thing is it is here next year! I am finally starting to sleep in after 3+ weeks but its lovely to wake without a hangover and i am grateful for that one.

Humble good morning lovely. Boxing day i would normally spend in bed wondering what i did xmas night until the boys proceeded to tell me how pissed i was. mmmm! I would put off drinking till 4 or 5ish when i thought i was able to drive to get more al. How times have changed for us thank god. Wow you did do well for xmas lucky girl. What a thoughtful present the coasters but i am sure bought some sad memories for you, i really admire you for sharing with us your son with us. I know today that i have to text my daughter or something as this will go on forever, she is more like my mother than i care to admit. Normally she comes over xmas eve and goes to his family xmas lunch and yes i was very hurt but as i told her it is her life now.

Oh my blackout that finally got me on the road to being af was at my nieces 21st in August. Not my first blackout but one minute i was on the lounge and the next i was on the floor. OMG in front of her friends and the family. It made me realise what a drunk i had become, that i could not even go out and behave myself as an adult.

Dot make sure that gift to yourself is flashy and gold or silver and big lol. Oh the family visiting for summer. I wonder who will be looking after everyone and what dh would do to help? I think we know the answer so be strong on that one.

IC i am sorry but what happened with your daughter? I hate missing posts. Glad that she is doing well though. I just want my children to be happy, healthy and respectful. Whatever else they achieve in life is a bonus.

Well today i will not drink, i am hoping the af miniscule thoughts i have been having go away although i had a huge one last night of getting a bottle but i was just sad and hurt and i know that bottle would not make that go away. I am beginning to be grateful for the strength i have within myself to say no to al and not give in to the beast. Today i will not drink.

Yesterday i started to clean my tv unit out and it has ended up a job "bigger than Ben Hur". Walls need washing, floors need scrubbing, decided to move everything around, cleaning windows, verticals. My daughter came over and said "thought you were just doing the tv unit". Never ever is just a tv unit when i start. That is my mission today to finish this mammoth job i started but it will look great when i have finished. I did think yesterday a wine would be nice doing this! Then i thought if i had a wine i would have had 10 and yep there went that job. Wow i talk to myself a lot.

Love you ladies and thanks for reading my wafflings.

How are you NS, K9, Pat (come home) and anyone else i have missed, please check in.

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Ladies,
I'm away for a few days, but brought my ipad!!! So, we've all had those massive embarrassments. I think talking about them makes us remember the pain that we felt afterwards. We never want to go there again. I know I still cringe thinking of the many times that i acted stupidly around hubby's family, my family, my son, friends. Too many to talk about, but if we remember all of these horrendous situations that AL kicked our ass, we will be stronger and know that we need to always keep our guard up.
Visiting family about 5 hours away. Most of us don't drink, as the beast has caught up with 4 out of the 6 people here. See a pattern!!!!

SL, enjoy your vacation. You sound so happy!

Iclem, welcome! And agree. That's all we want for our children. Happiness and health.

Dottie, don't drink over that! Why? Because it'll put us in a bad place, vulnerable, and the GSR bros will be with us, laughing at us. We are not drinkers. So what are you gonna get!!!!!

Ava, you're flexin dem sober muscles quite nicely! Happy cleaning, lady!

To all the dear ladies, have a great day.

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hello ladies!
Turkey dinner turned out excellent and everyone enjoyed. It was really hard, all day there was wine around and rum, eggnog etc.
Avail- sorry about your fight with your daughter. I can see how that would be a really painful situation. Relationships can be tough for sure. Hang in there honey.
J-Vo- blacking out, ya the story of my life. Hey- but that is why we are here right? No more shit like that. Glad you won't be experiencing that this year!
SL- you are doing great!
Iclem- welcome!
Dottie, that's a tough situation. What happens when you talk to him? "husband, please buy me a prezzie for Christmas" Will he follow through?
My hubby bought me some moccasins, which are from a Canadian Company, Manitobah Mukulks. All Aboriginally owned and run. I like to support businesses like that so anyway I got some nice moccasins from there. (check out the website!). I also got tea and face cream from my daughter. That was nice.
Going out for Italian food tonight. I will not drink. Italian food always goes well with wine OR FIZZY WATER...yes, that's what I will drink!
NS, Pav, Gratitude is the word of the day!

Hugs,

[Pavati]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

MAE, Lovely Peeps!

SL - I live north of SF in Marin County, so I am very near. Maybe we can meet up in 2014!? Have a great trip.

J-Vo - You are right about bad memories keeping us on the straight and narrow. One for me was at a family member's memorial service. We had to travel and were staying at a hotel with the family. we went out to a bar and I got so plowed my husband's cousin's husband had to basically help me up the stairs. That was many years ago but I still feel guilty and remorseful. I hope you have a fabulous trip with your sober family! You sound strong as usual.

Another NoSugar Gem - maybe we should start a thread just for those: Reading all the comments about gratitude made me wonder if that is a key difference between being sober and simply not drinking - one is just not doing something and the other is a state of being. Maybe true sobriety is our mission and the way to get there is not to drink.
Thanks for being there for us and summarizing things so nicely!

Humble - Ah, the gift of booze. I have a bottle that I need to pour down the sink when I get a chance, but I have to admit that I don't even want to take the top off the bottle at this point. I may have DH do it later. Sounds like you got some nice presents - I'm glad you can still appreciate Puget Sound after your son's accident - it probably makes you think of him...

Dottie - I agree with Ava - make it something nice and sparkly. You deserve it after the year you've had. As a matter of fact, why don't you make it TWO nice and sparkly things!

Eloise - I am intrigued by your post. What IS it you have to be grateful for??!! Inquiring minds want to know... I spent a great deal of yesterday being grateful as well. We have so much indeed, and sobriety is a great gift.

As NoSugar said, anyone who slipped COME BACK. There is NO judgement here - just support to keep everyone on track as much as possible. My sister forwarded this Pema Chodron quote of the week and it made me think of you all so I am sharing.

"It Can Go Either Way." Underlying hatred, underlying any cruel act or word, underlying all dehumanizing, there is always fear?the utter groundlessness of fear. This fear has a soft spot. It hasn?t frozen yet into a solid position. However much we don?t like it, fear doesn?t have to give birth to aggression or the desire to harm ourselves or others. When we feel fear or anxiety or any groundless feeling, or when we realize that the fear is already hooking us into ?I?m going to get even? or ?I have to go back to my addiction to escape this,? then we can regard the moment as neutral, a moment that can go either way.

Happy happy, All. Grateful for being here and sober. xo

[Pavati]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

X Post, Narilly. Gratitude IS the word for the day. Glad you had a nice one.

[Pavati]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Oh, and my favorite gift was an electric tea kettle from my husband. It's the simple things...

[lclem]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Thanks everyone for Welcoming me. Seems like a very loving supportive group. Congrats to all for af Xmas. Holidays are stressful

[bkyogagurl]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi ladies-

Hope you dont mind if I stop in. Spuddleduck & I have a thread going but I heard this is a nice place to stop in because I haven't achieved ABS yet but am hard at work trying to better myself. Sometimes I get a lonely when I trying not to drink and surf WMO quite a bit because I don't like to talk with my husband or family about it. Would like read back thru here and see what you ladies have going on.
Thanks.

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi BK and yes it is a great place to grab a cuppa and sit and read about all the lovely ladies lives and struggles but the struggles seem less with the support of here. I am from Aus so a different timezone to most on here which is a shame as sometimes it is nice to chat. When i first started on MWO i was the same as you, trying and wanting to get better, over al and what it did to me. Thanks to the support on here it has made me accountable in stopping.

Pav, i had to laugh about Dot getting to bits of bling, i totally agree with that as she definitely deserves it. Thanks for putting "It can go either way", so very very true. We are slowly overcoming the fear of life without al and that is a good thing right?

Its lovely to see some new faces and have some new stories to share. Well my boy is up to put the electricals in the tv cabinet so off to cleaning i go again.

[Dottie Belle]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Thanks everyone...I have not decided on the "bling" yet...but he did ask me what I wanted and I told him that I had told him before that a card was the very least he could to and if he didnt know me and what I like by now he was not paying any attention....I give up...I will jsut buy myself what I want. And so it goes...
Had a nice dinner out with friends...also went to the museum center to see the Christmas train displays.....
Thanks everyone for listening.....

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

HI Narilly! Sounds like you're going strong. I love your upbeat attitude of gratitude! Have a nice night out! Fizzy Water, my dear. This past summer, we visited relatives in Italy. No, we didn't understand each other, but stayed with them for three days. It was the best adventure and most memorable vacation I've ever had. Anyhow, they call it "water with or without 'gas.'" Yep!

Pav, thanks for that "It can go either way." Reposted to my journal!. You're sounding pretty strong yourself! And I suppose you're enjoying the time off work! I sure am. Oh, those mortifying events in our lives...they are no more.

Hi BKgurl and Iclem! Welcome and glad you're here!

What's up Ava! Still cleaning! Jeez! Take a break my dear lady friend.

Dottie, we usually don't buy each other gifts for xmas or bdays. We usually buy something for the house or go somewhere. In August, between our 50th birthday's (my husband's 50th is January 1) we're taking a trip to Las Vegas. He's been wanting to go there forever. So that'll be our gifts to each other.

Patrice, we miss you!!!!!