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    Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

    j-vo;1682574 wrote: Ava,

    El, I can't wait to see your weiner pic. You know I have a weinie, too! Yes, I'm a transexual...not! But I have a mini daucschund an he's my second child. Love him. Well, you have a bike, but you don't like to ride? Are there any nice trails that you could find that you would feel safe? For me, I never liked going to a gym to work out. The germs make me uncomfortable. I like Beachbody products and am using PiYo now - PIlates and Yoga and i've never done this type of exercise, but I'm finding I'm loving it.


    .
    Yup, I have a bike and I don't like to ride it seems. I had not ridden a bike since I was about 12, so who knew? My husband thought I needed it when we first arrived here. Everyone rides bikes here... I thought 'how quaint, what am I gonna do with that?!" but I didn't say anything. I rode it for a while but feel on the ice and now we are no longer friends. My bike and I.
    (AF since 17 May 2014) 2 years 5 months sober

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      Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

      El, maybe you and your bike will make up one day when it is nice out It can be such fun to ride a bike but falling sucks. I don't ride on the ice because of that.

      Ava, yes the people you work with sound really childish! At least you are not stooping to their level. Keep your head up and in the meantime this other job might come through.
      It is hard working with people who are like that because you can't get away from them. There they are everyday at work treating you badly. I hope you can get out of there soon.

      Daisy, that really is tough with your sister. I can see how it would be hard to watch. Hopefully she figures it out and you can help her if she asks. All your mom's relatives, did they move to Canada? I hear Ireland is beautiful, it is on my list of places to go.

      J-Vo, you are sounding great babes! Love ya.

      Hey, I listened to the Bubble Hour yesterday and there was a blogger named Mrs D. She wrote a book called Mrs D is Going Without. The pod cast was really interesting. At the end she talked about the word 'sober' and what it meant to her. I forgot exactly what she said but basically Sober was the best word Ever.
      I am Sober and love being Sober!

      Well, I have to get back to work so I will check in later, love you girls.
      Narilly

      "Nothing in this World Can take the place of Persistence"
      "You can have the life you want OR you can Drink"

      AF April 12, 2014

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        Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

        Heya Daisy!! Good to see you are fine and on track.
        Ah, end of day but a good one and I am grateful for that.
        (AF since 17 May 2014) 2 years 5 months sober

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          Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

          Nar, one moved to Toronto, the rest around Long Island. We have a massive familt over there as well as here. Facebook has been great for us getting to know them and keeping connected.
          Eloise, you too! Today has been another one of those days where I had plans and again inundated with visitors over a period of 5 hours. I am making a point of getting up and out so early tomorrow....have given up today and just gonna have a lazy one....won't do any harm.....at least I can catch up here.
          IT'S NEVER TOO LATE TO BE WHAT YOU MIGHT HAVE BEEN
          Relapse starts long before the drink is drunk!!.Fresh Start!

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            Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

            Ava glad to hear you are looking forward to a new phase in your life.
            Daisy its great you are having fun. Going out, having lots of visitors.
            Kailey keep close. The stress will pass.
            J-vo have fun basketball mom.
            No matter how far you go or how fast you run, you can't get away from yourself. ....said at an AA meeting. It stuck with me.

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              Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

              Hi, All

              Here's my rant for today (which does not relate to anyone's post here - y'all just get to listen because I'm not putting it in a thread where everyone is not on a mission to get alcohol out of their lives): My opinion is that if a person makes it all the way to MWO and signs up, s/he probably cannot moderate alcohol intake at all or without a great deal of daily effort, accompanied by occasional episodes or periods of over-indulgence.

              I know there are people who used to drink too much, even in a manner that appeared to be an addiction, but who decided to cut back and drink less each time, or less often, or both. It can be done by some people. I liken it to making a dietary change such as giving up sugar, a substance which has weakly addictive properties. It takes commitment and effort but certainly does not require a support group and all that entails.

              Didn't all of you try to moderate your drinking several times before you joined MWO? Maybe I'm wrong, but I can't imagine a person have it occur to them for the first, or even a few, times that they're drinking too much and immediately join a forum such as this. Unless you use drugs that take away the thrill, it seems really unlikely to me that anyone who reaches the point of joining MWO is going to become the kind of drinker who has one every now and again and doesn't stress about it in between, isn't disappointed if plans fall through and they don't get to drink, and isn't set off by a "slip" into a period of drinking addictively.

              Your thoughts? If anyone is a moderator with an experience that shows I'm wrong, I'd be interested in hearing your take on all of this, too.

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                Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

                NS love your rant girl and i totally agree. Of course i found this place drunk one night when i was getting to the worst place i could be and not knowing what to do. AA to me was not an option for some reason and luckily i found here. It doesnt matter if i did not drink as much as some (there were a few that drank more and i am running with that), i knew if i came on here i had to stop drinking not pussy foot around although there were a few times in the beginning when i did drink and pretended to be sober! I ran away to moderate, failed dismally and came back here a few years later totally determined to give up. I would never keep drinking on a non drinking site, seems a tad ludicrous to me.

                Denial? Attention seeking? Loneliness?

                Oh NS i didnt moderate before joining MWO, i did not know there was such a word. My thought was i was going to give up but that never worked so i kept drinking. I learnt the word moderate on here and thought that that sounded just what i was after. Obviously it did not work for me as i am an alcoholic and i am addicted to al.
                AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2022 - 9 years of freedom

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                  Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

                  NS, I ended up here one day when I was hungover and just so sick and tired of being sick and tired. And, of course, this was the best website because I saw that I could moderate by taking sups and vitamins and topamax! So I ordered all the stuff from River Pharmacy and started to moderate. I tried to moderate for a few years. Honestly, it was just like before I started to moderate.
                  I Never could control my AL intake on a consistent basis, NEVER EVER! I stopped taking the supps and posting on here and just kept 'moderating'. It really never worked. I still was hungover at least once a week.
                  So then I came back here in November 2013 and was determined to quit. After a few setbacks I feel I am well on my way to live an AF life.
                  If someone comes to MWO they already have a problem. Very few people can cut back and drink moderately- Once you are a pickle you cant become a cucumber, right?

                  I am on a mission to get AL out of my life and i think most of us Loamers are! Right Gals & G?
                  Narilly

                  "Nothing in this World Can take the place of Persistence"
                  "You can have the life you want OR you can Drink"

                  AF April 12, 2014

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                    Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

                    Nar, for the moderation approach on this site, aren't the various medications part of the protocol? I can imagine it working to moderate if there is no buzz or reward. I think I could have quit w/o support if I hadn't been getting those!

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                      Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

                      Hi girls,
                      My experience over the last few years supports the pickle/cucumber theory. I did know I had a problem when I joined this diet. But it's taking/ taken a long time for me to understand what works and what doesn't. What is working for me is not picking up that first drink..I couldn't even begin to simplify it like this back in 2009...I'm just so grateful that I can make it really basic, for now.

                      I'm still so sick with a head cold, flu, sinus... I'm not sure. This is the third day of feeling so shite... Any
                      ideas of getting rid of this faster?? I'm taking zinc, vit c, lots of fluid...panadol night and day.

                      Have a great day all
                      Xx
                      Pat

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                        Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

                        Great job on your AF vacation, Pat. It sure seems like everyone comes home sick . Maybe in the bad old days our blood was even inhospitable to germs .

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                          Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

                          Yes NS, it's really odd, I don't often get sick.. I know Ava had her bug for ages...

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                            Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

                            NS, it didn't work for me. The meds and supps are supposed to help moderate But the buzz only comes from the booze. I LOVED that buzz and even if I felt it just a little, it was Game ON. Let the drinking begin!
                            So glad I am on the Abstinence thread.

                            I think it is something I had to go through though. I had to learn over and over again that I could not moderate. It is the only way I know that the only thing for me is Abstinence.

                            Pat, I hope you get better soon. Maybe try some fresh ginger in your tea with honey? I wish I could help more. Hang in there babe, I think you are on the right track!

                            xo
                            Narilly

                            "Nothing in this World Can take the place of Persistence"
                            "You can have the life you want OR you can Drink"

                            AF April 12, 2014

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                              Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

                              In response to NS's rant...

                              I have lots of thoughts on this. My understanding is that from the first moment you think you may have a problem, you've already had several drunken episodes, problems with relationships, in life and so on. For me, I didn't get it that it was the alcohol. Yeah, I'm a slow learner I guess. But when it did occur to me that I probably did have a problem, I began reading here in 2007. I read for a year before I joined. I believe I joined first and wanted to quit. Then I read about moderation and then I was a failed moderator. Then I read about all the supps and ordered like a crazy person and popped every supplement they support on this site, then it was baclofen, a dangerous drug, then it was AA, then it was moderation again, then it was October, 2013 where I finally knew and/or accepted I had to stop. So, lots of years wasted on many different philosophies, drugs, supplements, schools of thought...Ya see, I'm not one to fail that test. I'm going to make it work, somehow. I just had to find the thing that worked for me. I wasn't going to stop until I found it. And guess what! I never found a way out except for abstinence. Recovery. Knowing and believing that I'm an alcoholic. Acceptance of that. I probably knew it all along, but damn, I'm going to try every method that i can get my hands on.

                              Alcoholism isn't an easy thing to accept about oneself because of the stigma. We feel like we're the losers, like we're the ones that can't have fun anymore. And being new to this, that's just what it is. Now I know better. Now, after 105 days, I can say that I love my life more than I ever have. Yep, for sure it took me a long freaking time to accept it. But I think it's not only a progressive disease in the physical sense, but it takes most of us a long time mentally to accept ourselves as a person in recovery. So when people come back and say they wanna get it under control, what we may say, such as Byrdie's method of bringing up early posts, makes one think more, and question what their goal is, but the longer we're here, the more time we put in here, it eventually sticks. Yes, it eventually sticks as it progressively gets worse, and I know I didn't want to live that hellish life anymore.

                              Everyone's ability to accept is different. Some believe they can fight and win, and have to see for themselves it's not going to happen. Even If they're a fighter, they'll eventually see that it's not going to work, because of the progression of disease. If they're not fighting the fight, they'll get sloppy enough to want to quit if they find help. It's all up to the individual. No one can put anyone into rehab or make them recover. It's up to that person. No one could have forced it on me, but as i was exposed to this site, other information, people in recovery, I finally got it. That's 7 years and probably more because we should always add on with us, so that's 10 years I've had a problem and am finally doing it the right way. 10 years of struggling. I hope others aren't as slow as I am, but sometimes I think that's what it's going to take...experience, experimenting with various ideas, tools, ideas, and if continuing down that slippery slope happens, then hopefully finding out that recovery is the method method.
                              Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

                              Comment


                                Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

                                Pat,
                                Hope you start to feel better!

                                Daisy,
                                Great to hear from you. Yep, we can't make 'em quit. We can be good role models though. I was pushing on my sister for awhile and then just let it go. I think she's figuring out on her own, and I'm glad.
                                Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

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