Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[NoSugar]

Thanks, SL! I agree with all of that but ... as a lifestyle, not a 10 day treatment :wink:.
Are you thinking of giving it a try?

P.S. I have a long ways to go on the caffeine...

[scottish lass]

It is blurb from a 10 day program that is a cleanse and diet change start - I am thinking of it, maybe after Christmas - just can't bear the thought of turning away chocolate for the holidays - and Narilly told me to get ice-cream and choc sauce:yay:

[satz123]

Ladies this is a great thread-I applaud you :welldone:and what MWO it's all about. Shared experiences-let's people know they are not alone in this.
I am sure new folk will get great comfort from knowing there is light at the end of the tunnell - as they are probably still living similar experiences.
Old timers like myself take comfort in the fact we made the right decision - this has deffo reinforced it for me

[satz123]

My problem really took off after my kids had left home, Pav. I think the fewer number of witnesses around enabled me to get away with it. I would have been caught "sneaking" with those extra eyes on me, I'm sure. My husband is neither very observant nor confrontational. That seemed good at the time but looking back, I wish someone had intervened.

I have no desire for one glass of wine - that just sounds irritating. Even the bottle I bought for guests recently looked really small. The thought of being hungover is horrible so the solution for me is to just leave it alone.

Could have written that exact post NS - including the extra eyes and the 'blinkered' hubby

[NoSugar]

We can be sober twins, Satz :hug:! It's good to see you here - I know like us you're on a mission to keep this mere chemical from screwing up your life anymore so it's a good place to hang out when you can (despite the darn time zone issues).

[Pavati]

Hi, All:

Home alone usually means vodka, takeout and bad TV. I had two out of three last night, only I'll modify the takeout with BAD. I got indigestion that meant a crappy sleep, but at least I didn't have the vodka to really screw things up.

I am looking forward to some alone time today to listen to podcasts and clean my closet. It is a wonderfully stormy day here - feels good to finally get some rain.

Hope everyone's having a great, sober Saturday.

Good to see you, Satz!

Pav

[Eloise]

Yup, a pretty okay sober Saturday over here in Europe. Albeit a bit lonely, but ... well... such is life sometimes.

[little beagle]

Rough morning for me. As I was cleaning the barbershop, vacuuming, the back door must have come open. Both dogs vanished. I thought I was losing my mind because the wind must have blown it back shut. Hubby ask on the phone if I was sure I hadn't taken them home. No I am not drinking.! I told him. I remember what I did. They went for a long 2 hour walk in the field behind the house and ignored me. Well maybe not quite 2 hours, but it felt like a LONG time. 0
We are all back safe and sound ready for a nice nap.

[little beagle]

Just so everyone knows, Mr. B has been trying to post, is doing alright, staying strong. He's just in an area with limited internet and has difficulty figuring out HOW to post sometimes.

[scottish lass]

Happy doggies LB - a lovely romp! Sorry for you though!
Having quiet weekend here - girls out last night and again today - would have been the perfect excuse for merriment a year ago, but enjoying the quiet time. Pav - I managed to even BBQ a chicken breast and had it with melon, delicious - thought of take out, but i do think wine helped that stuff go down most of the time!
Got my butt out of bed this am - hard because my lovely bed was warm and cosy, outside was dark, cold and WET! but managed a run, and I love the fact that I could do that!! Going to cook a good warm supper for when girls come back cold, wet and dirty - they are at a horse clinic. This is how weekends should be spent. Did a little shop, bought a single mini bottle red wine to put in the goulash and had no concerns at all. Bought a lovely plant for me instead of a bottle of wine.
Sorry you are lonely El - saw you on another thread...will keep my eye here to chat if needed. Pav, hope you are enjoying the closet cleaning - feel free to nip over and sort mine out too!! Lets try to not be lonely this weekend - and if it maintains ensure that we take care of the rest of HALT so we stay strong - deal??

[available]

Morning ladies/gents

Well a lovely Sundaymorning here, sun is shining, bloody budgies are chirping loudly and boys are sleeping. A perfect start to the day.

Some great stories girls on our last drinking days. Scary shit to think that we got to that stage. I think mine started in August with passing out at my nieces 21st and ended with a huge argument with mum and her saying she was never coming back and me saying "good, you are a vicious bitch". I think the total realisation of losing control in everything in my life was the last straw. I could not bullshit myself anymore that the anxiety, depression, bleeding gums, nausea, dry wretching, diahorrea, blackouts, sores that would not heal, children backing away, work falling apart was due to anything but my drinking. I had the full body anxiety also and i know my next step was to quit my job and just drink till i died. I was trying to find a good enough excuse to tell the family that was what my plan was. Luckily for me, NS gave me the encouragement that i needed to start on this journey and i am so glad i did. I love my life now, i never did when i was drinking. Sure some days are better than others but i know drinking did not solve one goddamn issue i had in my life, it created a hell of a lot of problems.

LB i am so glad you found the dogs. My shitzu used to love going for a walk to find a new family. So stressful and so hard to toss up whether to drink and wait to see if she was at the pound or look for her. Those were the days! Thankfully now she doesnt wander. Our babies are our life. Glad Mr B is doing great and say hi to him for me. he should be very proud of himself for getting through this sober, its a great achievement in such hard circumstances.

I love it that now we can all just have a night without drinking and being shitfaced. Al doesnt come into the equation of a night for me now. I was talking to Liam last night and he has been 2 years ICE free in March. We were talking about the first year of being sober and being emotionally stunted and only now does he feel that he is "coming into his own". If he had of told me that 8 months ago i would not have believed him so my next journey is one of totally coming into my own and i am so looking forward to that one.

I had best go and clean my linen cupboard. i did my drawers to Pav and its the small things in life that make me happy now, so many clothes for one person!

Have a great day xx

[NoSugar]

I agree with Liam, Ava. The changes during the second year are more subtle but they make a big difference. Most people find that for the most part they don't have any interest in drinking. Without those thoughts distracting you or just cluttering up your mind, there is time and energy for so many more interesting and important things. I'm feeling much more like my remembered self now than I did a year ago.

El, I'm sorry you were feeling down today :hug:. I hope tomorrow seems brighter.

LB, thank goodness your dogs are ok! I had a scare with mine today, too, when she ran out on to some thin, cracking ice on a pond.

SL and Pav, isn't it great to reclaim the time we get to spend alone? Now that I like myself again, the company is good and it is great to have open hours to do the things I want or need to do. I used to look forward to it for all the wrong reasons but now it is a chance for much healthier self-indulgence :smile:.

[Pavati]

Full confession. I didn't lift a finger to clean. Instead I watched my son play basketball, went on a nice walk to the coast, and watched some episodes of my guilty pleasure TV. Such is life.

LB - Sorry for the stress - not really what you need. Glad Mr. B is good. Thanks for the check in.

I seem to continue to have more thoughts of drinking than I have in a long time, so I'm writing them here. I'm not going to drink, but it IS getting boring. My current guess is that with this one year milestone coming up I'm having a case of the fuck-its as Ava mentioned. Really? Forever? Maybe I could just have some now and then. A wedding? Blah, Blah, Blah. Just like always, when I play through the scenario, the answer is YES! FOREVER! And LIFE IS GOOD! Why would I want to screw that up with drinking. But those thoughts keep coming. I am most certainly not hungry, as I am apparently eating for hibernation. No anger - very content. Lonely? Not so much. DH is gone, but I don't get much time alone, and as written above, I am filling my time with relaxing things. Tired? Maybe a little, but not overly so. I'm just chalking it up to part of the process, and further confirmation that this is a tenacious beast. I think of it like Voldemort. Leave him alone and he's a quivering splat of ectoplasm by the fire, but just a little attention and he gets all power hungry and excited (I'm not sure how many of you have read the Harry Potter books, so bear with me).

Anyway - I'm with you all. Seriously amazingly happily sober. Glad to be walking straight down the hallway to bed, knowing I will feel great in the morning.

xo
Pav

[available]

I think Pav that we think, well we have thoughts of that we have gotten this far surely we have some sort of control. We now have control over most aspects of our new normal life so why not drinking too. I have had those thoughts coming up to a year also so you are not alone. I wont drink as i have way too much to lose but voldermort is raising his ugly head and its just really annoying.

Mia over now so a quick message. Off to see Robert off on his operation tomorrow so a long day of worry ahead. I do get to spend time with both the girls and get a haircut so that will make the time go faster. An early start for Mia and I. She is coming with me for mum support which is lovely.

[NoSugar]

I'm just chalking it up to part of the process, and further confirmation that this is a tenacious beast. I think of it like Voldemort. Leave him alone and he's a quivering splat of ectoplasm by the fire, but just a little attention and he gets all power hungry and excited (I'm not sure how many of you have read the Harry Potter books, so bear with me).

Pav, I've had the Voldemort image come to mind, too, but now that we dare to speak its name here, like you just did, we strip it of its power. Maybe you could find a phrase (mine is "I don't drink") to shut off those thoughts as quickly as possible - almost automatically.

Ava, you make a great point - as we feel more and more confident and in control, it does seem like we are "normal" in all ways and can handle anything. I guess I've finally come to see alcohol as not being a thing that is normal to drink - it is an addictive poison for me and toxic for everyone. Given all the other changes I've made over the years to regain and preserve my health, it would be crazy for me to drink at all, much less given that I know I'm addicted to it. Now that it finally is a choice again, the right choice is clear.

I hope Robert's surgery is a success that makes him much more comfortable.


Here is is a Harry Potter primer :smile:: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ONMwLBehZ_U