Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[scottish lass]

Morning all - yes Cowboys post was a reminder, wake up call and many other things. I feel so near to when 30 days was a huge goal, almost insurmountable and very elusive. Coming up to my year I have been feeling a little scared and working thru my feelings. Cowboys post helps me to realize going back is not an option.
I started running last year and the goal was a 5K. I did it, and did it pretty well. I had aspirations of maintaining and doing the occasional 5K and maybe up to a 10K - and at this point am NOT running. I am reaching my year and in my head is what next. I know what I want and what I will do but scared that it might be hard. The daily goal, then weekly, then monthly.....then what? I have to keep the carrot in front - just now it is Feb 21st, it can't be Feb 21st 2016 - that is too far off? Dear ladies who are in maintenance how do you do it??
LC - pecking on my phone - will send the quote later.
Hi j-vo, Pav,TT, Ava, Pat, narilly, LB, Jane,El and all else popping by

[abcowboy]

Hi Gloamers... first and foremost, thanks again from the bottom of my heart! I'm still feeling a bit humiliated/humbled/afraid and hopefully with time and counselling, I'll be better able to deal with those feelings. I will be here everyday, reading and absorbing, not always posting on all the threads, but will start openly sharing this new journey that I'm on in my "secret" thread. Thanks again my friends, you all deserve more than you realize!

[narilly]

Just want to say, Don't you Dare quit Us Cowboy!! We need you!

SL, I just have made being active a part of my life. I don't really have a goal per se but I make sure to do something almost everyday. This might mean just walking for 20 minutes but then it might mean a 20 km bike ride. Whatever works.
You can do it. That's so cool you ran 5k no problem. How awesome is that!

[scottish lass]

LC - I was actually trying to find another quote that kept me going in the past - but found this one instead...

Start with a dream...
Add faith and it becomes a belief
Add action and it becomes part of life
Add perseverance and it becomes a goal in sight
Add patience and life and it ends with a dream come true

A short one i used too -
Believe you can and you are half way there.

I think the one I was looking for yesterday is...
You never fail until you stop trying - Einstein

[scottish lass]

Heck Narilly - I love that you took "did it pretty well" to mean "no problem" :congratulatory:

[narilly]

Lol SL!
Hey your quote reminds me of the secret. Actually I use this way of thinking all the time. It works!

[patrice]

MAE all!,

I'm really into inspirational quotes and readings. I recommend this website

https://www.marcandangel.com

I Love it and it has helped me massively in trying to unravel and deal with my feelings and emotions. Counseling would have been my first choice but alcohol counseling is not available here so this is a very good second choice!
J- Vo or anyone .. Please check it out, I'm sure you will find something that resonates with you...
Had the worst sleep, awake every 2 hours so got up at 5am... Sitting on the balcony, this time of the morning here is so lovely. It's dark and warm , prayer call reverberating through the jungle, coffee ....oh and a cigarette . But Un Hung and happy that I made a good choice on Sat and Sun
Have a great sleep... Today I'm telling myself " Everything is as it should be"
Xx
Pat

[NoSugar]

I know what I want and what I will do but scared that it might be hard. The daily goal, then weekly, then monthly.....then what? I have to keep the carrot in front - just now it is Feb 21st, it can't be Feb 21st 2016 - that is too far off? Dear ladies who are in maintenance how do you do it?

Hi, SL
The timing probably varies among individuals but at some point, future goals become less important - the reward is the day-to-day living without the burden of an addiction. I can't imagine going back and giving up all I've regained (and gained for the first time), so incentives to stay AF aren't as critical anymore. However, I do still pull out the "look how much money I've saved" card when I want to buy something that I really don't need :wink:.

Xpost, Pat - so glad you're back!

[patrice]

Thanks NS!

[little beagle]

Sorry for not checking in much this weekend. It's been sunny and warm, I did housework and got outside. Yay!!!
J-vo I still stay home because I just don't want to be around lots of people drinking. My daughter wants me to go to a Mardi Gras ball with her at the end of this month and I just don't want that atmosphere of drinking right now. We'll see.
Not giving up. Not letting that monster rule our world. That's what matters. I see people who just give up, who don't even try.
SL I still have goals in this my second year. Maybe more then the first year. My first year was all about not drinking. Everything revolved around that. This year has been more about personal goals. Finally being able to deal with thoughts and feelings buried under alcohil for so long. Getting reacquainted with ME!
Ava give that pup a great big hug for me. I'm glad Robert is going with you. That he's able to return some of your caring. That has to make him feel good. Village idiots. Haha.

[narilly]

Well another sober weekend under my belt. I find it pretty easy not to drink right now but I certainly have my moments. I know I have to stay vigilant. Sometimes I just get this feeling like I just want to have some wine.
I have to push those thoughts quickly away before they manifest and I end up saying F'it.

I don't know when those thoughts will go away. Maybe never? I hope they become less and less over time anyway.

LilB, that's good you are going to set boundaries and not go to Mardi Gras. I think that would be tough.

Goodnight Gloamers.
Tomorrow I will be Un Hung!

[lifechange]

Hiya Gloamers,
I fell asleep at 9 last night with the girls and also had a restless night, Pat! I got up at 530 to enjoy my coffee with all of you. The warm weather on the balcony sounds wonderful.. I can only open the door to ours for 30 seconds! Pat, I also really like that website, but had forgotten about it--thanks for posting it again. You're sounding strong and ready to face the week..

Thanks SL for the quotes! I love the one about dreams..

I went to a nice meditation AA meeting yesterday that began with 20 minutes of meditation. It's something I really enjoy and get a lot of benefit from when I find the discipline to do it--but usually don't. I think I'll make it a regular part of my Sunday..

LB, I like what you said about using the 2nd year to work on personal goals and things about yourself that were hiding behind the alcohol. How nice to get to know yourself again. I'm so looking forward to that. I have realised that I don't really know who I am any more. I don't know my boundaries or how to find balance.. when to go easy on myself and when to force myself to do something that is probably good for me. but is it? Right now I'm also focussing on just not drinking. But it seems like a long time to 30 days and a year.. well.

hi and hugs to Nar, J-vo, SL, NS, ABCowboy, Ava! and all Gloamers checking in today. Wishing you all a good Monday!

[available]

Hi gloamers

Well my poppy is home from the vets, very quiet but i think happy to be back. she is growling at the other dogs so she is better than what she was. The good thing is i have an excuse to do nothing as she wants me near her.

Jvo is this quit harder this time as you definitely cant drink? there is no "feck its" or "opt outs" and if you drink the consequences are something you cant contemplate, understandly so! As we all say as we get along in days, if we accept the fact that we cant drink ever again it is easier to live with.

SL i stopped walking too, now i procrastinate but i am starting again. Why do you need a plan/maintenance when you get to a year? Do "normal" people plan and plan and plan, i dont think so. I am learning that if i just get on in life and i am happy and dont drink then i am accomplishing two things that i never had when i was drinking. Why do we have to feel we need to push ourselves so much now we dont drink?

I felt that i needed to go to the gym, give up smoking, learn to crotchet, knit this or that, get my kitchen in order, do a course, change jobs, walk when i thought ffs Linda, you get up at 5.30am, you go to work, you get home at 5.30pm, feed and talk with dogs, make their meal and yours, when really and who really does anything after that. I was putting way too much pressure on myself and we seem good at that so i have taken a step back and thought that if it gets done it does and if it doesnt then thats ok too. I lived on guilt when i drank, i will be damned if i will do that now. One day at a time! Just be happy you dont drink is my advice.

Cowboy i am happy you are striving for that equilibrium in life. When i gave up drinking i knew i had to be honest and truthful with myself and others and i have not waivered from that. Its hard to forgive ourselves but that comes in time and so does forgiving others. If others dont like the new me that is their problem not mine, i now say how i feel instead of just pleasing others and its a shock for some so be it. I am never intentionally hurtful but i will not be walked over anymore.

Nar i forgot to say happy 9 months, its so good to see you settled and cruising along.

Take care everyone
xxx

[paulywogg]

Available, I loved what you wrote right there! I tend to take on too much all at once and then I get overwhelmed with it all,I started walking again, then recently started jogging, uh no,I nearly fell over yesterday, best to start off slowly for me,then I'm trying to quit smoking and feel like a failure cuz I can't, feel guilty about my diet, feel bad cuz my house is unorganized, I just gotta try and let it be for now,thanks for putting into words what I was thinking, and I'm glad its not just me

[narilly]

Good Morning.
I guess that is why they say "one day at a time". It is not just about drinking, its about taking life one day at a time.
We all have to learn how to do that.

UN Hung Monday, love it! Have a great day Gloamers.

Cowboy, hope things are going well for you. Big hug from me.