Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[scottish lass]

TT - sorry you are sick. Hopefully it departs quickly!
I like happy TV and movies - I think my work provides enough of teh dark side that I need light relief!
Pav - I contacted the lead counselor who referred me back to my daughters counselor - who then recommended alternative school! Not the "help" I was looking for. The alternate school in our district is for expelled kids, and kids with attendance problems, drug issues and control issues - my daughter does not need that environment....so working with the tutoring organisation she is with to approach the school to get what is needed....oh my...
Lots going on - yet again, so dropping by and staying in touch....(keeping my inoculations up to date )

[jane27]

Lil, I miss you. We're due for a phone catch up. Gonna try calling you tomorrow.
Wishing all my Gloamer family a peaceful MAE. Xo

[jane27]

Morning Gloamers, this morning I have an appointment with the inspector who checked out the house when we bought in 2007. All the problems were pretty much laid out and if we had been smart we would have taken them seriously and negotiated for a significant reduction in price. Chalk that one off as a lesson learned. In the last year I have been using the report as a checklist and the purpose of the appointment this morning is to ask him some questions that I have regarding comments in the report, as well as specific things I am not sure about. At least he's unbiased. Snow here again. What have you all got planned for today? Xo Jane

[Dottie Belle]

Sorry I haven't been posting here. Been on the steppers thread a lot. I am so lost without my husband that I cant hardly function and the snow has me trapped in the house. I have so much that needs to be done and I am just lost. Nothing to look forward to and lost. I am alone and sad.....

[treetops]

Dear Dottie, my heart goes out to you. Its still so raw for you and being trapped inside does not help. Have you got people to talk to? Don't worry about all the things that have to be done unless they really are urgent. Can you make a list of the really urgent tasks - and try to either work out the order to do them in, or to get some help for this.
We are here as much as we can be for you. You need rest too, so sleep or rest when you can.

[narilly]

Oh Dottie, my heart goes out to you too. Hang in there, make sure you are taking care of yourself. It is so good to hear from you. I hope the weather gets warmer soon so its easier to get out of the house.

TT, hope you feel better soon.

I am meeting two girlfriends that I grew up with tomorrow. We drank a lot together. My friend wants to go to this restaurant which sells great Margaritas. Uh boy. Tequila was the worst thing for me when I drank! Anyway, I am looking forward to meeting them and drinking soda and lime or something like that. I have no desire to drink. I will just tell them that I am not drinking anymore for my health.

Talk soon,

[Dottie Belle]

My friends are calling and texting me so I have folks around sort of. His sister leaves tomorrow then I will be alone. If the damn snow would melt I could get to the gym and have some interaction with real people. I can not isolate or I wont survive for long. I have to go on and he would have wanted that for me. I just never in a million years thought I would be going at this alone....counseling appointment next week so I hope she can help me sort this out.

[treetops]

Dottie - yes, get out and mix with people as soon as you can. Give the counsellor a go - some click with us and some don't. Just see how you feel.
Nar - protect your quit on your date with the old friends. You might find you want to leave a bit sooner than you thought. But you are a strong woman and if you say, you don't drink - then thats it. I find these days that some of my old drinking buddies don't drink as much as they used to and places I used to like, bore me now. I still go out sometimes (hardly ever) with friends who drink a bit but I'm not there to watch them unravel or rehash why I don't drink anymore.
I'm sharing an apartment with a close friend for about a week in June when I go to Europe. She likes a few glasses of wine some nights but she was careful to ask me if that was OK before she drank when I first quit. She also made sure that we had food, as I used to get edgy if I was hungry and not drinking AL. She's been really supportive of my sobriety (although she lives in the UK and I live in NZ) and its just not an issue now. Good luck!

[patrice]

Hi all,
Dottie, I really hope it stops snowing so you can go out....
Hope everyone is ok
Xx
Pat

[jane27]

Dottie,
I think of you all the time and how challenging it must be to do anything under the weight of such an abrupt and tragic loss. I think you are doing an incredible job of putting one foot forward in front of the other, and it makes me feel good to see you posting. You are going to ache for a while- there is no getting around it, and life wont ever be the same as it was. I'm sure its impossible to imagine but you will get through this, and you will feel joy again one day. Not the same kind of joy, but joy none the less. Keep being the smart and determined woman you are, and look for humor wherever you can. I know your husband is proud of you and watching over you with love and guidance.

[narilly]

TT, thanks for your words of wisdom. Ya, my friends probably drink way less now themselves. I am so glad I am not drinking, I would be trying to get them to drink more and then I would go home and drink wine. Gross.

Dottie, his sister is leaving tomorrow eh? It sure is tough being alone with too much time to think. I can't imagine the loneliness you feel. Hope the counsellor is good and that you really click with her/him.
Have a great night everyone.

[Pavati]

Hi, Everyone:

Dot - I think of you a lot, too. I can't imagine the pain and anger you must feel - and how disorienting it must be to lose someone who was a part of you. I am grateful to hear from you, and do hope you get some exercise soon. That will help at least a little.

SL - What? That doesn't sound right. I hope you find SOMEONE in that District to give you some support.

Jane and Lil - I am prone to collect things and DON'T organize them, but my husband does exactly what you describe. Maybe I'll buy that book for him. I have learned to let go and get rid of stuff for the most part - have had to as we live in a teeny apartment.

Just realized the time. Off to get A2 from practice!

Feel better, LB and TT!

xo
Pav

[scottish lass]

Hi - busy week, both personally and workwise - but I am not drinking, so I can handle it!
I am happy today and I love that feeling.

Thanks Pav - it feels good to hear that from you, I am pushing a bit, but if school does not help the tutoring clinic is coming through in leaps and bounds. They are picking my daughter up early (as I don't get home in time) taking her to do her homework at the center and then the tutor spends time reviewing the work instead of helping with the homework for the whole tutoring session - and they are only charging me for gas for this extra help. She has gone from four F's to all D's - it is not great, but it is the right direction!! And she feels positive that she can do this, so all feels good.
And my wayward employee is no longer employed
and the sun is out!!!

Nar - starting to let folks home know that I am coming and getting response of arranging to go out for drinks...will be quietly mentioning alternatives or that I am not drinking (and Tequila gave me the worst hangovers ever!)

Dottie - I am sorry for all you are going thru, and I would love to bottle a bit of my good cheer and send it your way. All you are feeling is so terribly normal - and even though it is hard, it is better than being numb. One of the terrible sides of loving is the emptiness when it is gone, but not loving would be worse. Hopefully you can manage to enjoy memories and keep moving thru this. You are being very strong and have a wonderful attitude to move on that will ensure you survive this..

[treetops]

Saturday morning here and I usually take my daughter to archery but its too wet and windy today. I have even lit the fire!
Jane - this might make you smile, I am about to take a bunch of stuff to the charity shop. And it feels really good! Don't let stuff rule your life!
SL - you sound really strong and positive in dealing with the school and thats great. and you are seeing small but incremental changes for your daughter - and that is what matters. Things won't change overnight but if she keeps with the (limited) support this should build up her confidence as well as her learning.
As for the holiday - eek, requests already for meeting up where AL may be an issue. You are doing right in forewarning them - but you are going to be tough. Try really hard to organize things where AL will not be the focus, or even available. And stress to family that not drinking is serious for you - i.e. non-negotiable. This is your second year and you have been through so much - so you will be a bit vulnerable around family and friends. The best gift they can give you is support - and all that often takes is just not pressuring you (saying things like 'just the one won't hurt' or 'we always celebrate at this place', or 'you will hurt my feelings if you don't toast to this' dragging up alcoholic-related incidents from the past). You will be tired and frazzled when you first arrive - so thats a time to be really on your guard. When is the trip - it must still be a while away so don't worry now.
OK - hope everyone else is well and enjoys the weekend. My partner is now sick (thats fun fun fun for me!1) but I think I am on the mend.

[scottish lass]

Sick males - almost as bad as sick nurses!!!
Holiday not till July - so time.
hair cut and spring blond in - sorry your weather is turning TT.
I paid off my car this month and got a message that I overpaid and a check was on its way. I need new sunglasses (prescription ones) so I thought, great I can afford them now so went to chose some. Check arrived and whoop-de-do, a great $1.22!!!