Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[patrice]

TT - I'm pretty wary of pharmaceuticals and will go on it for the minimalist time possible and if I try and it doesn't suit me I won't bother..
I'm really hoping it will help me deal with the heat better!

[Pavati]

Hi, all:

SL, that IS impressive. She own a house that was hers before they married, but she has only been working part time and because it is CA, it is community property. If he loses another job (likely), she's afraid she'll lose the house.

LB - It sounds like you work plenty hard. I'm sorry about your situation.

TT - Sorry about the work situation - I hate stewing when you can't do anything. Do you have to wait until Monday?

Nar - I didn't realize your son is in Thailand. What's he doing? Having fun, no doubt. A young person's paradise.

Ava - Yes, men ARE good for a thing or two...

Jane - You're sounding good these days, neck cricks notwithstanding. I need to tackle my little basement room one of these days...

Pat - Let me know how the HRT goes - might be something I'd explore as I seem to be all over the map emotionally these days. I am also getting bouts of extreme spaciness - almost feels like I'm high. Anyone else getting that? I napped today for the first time in probably a year. It felt good, but I always have such a hard time waking up...

NS - Hope you're having a fabulous weekend.

Dot - We're here with you and for you.

Pepper, Frances, G, Cowboy, LC, J-Vo, Ginger, Wags, and all you other Past and Future Gloamers - Hope you're all great.

xo
Pav

[abcowboy]

Howdy gloamers! Ah, time change morning, get up sleepy, but pour the java and enjoy the conversations on MWO, got to love sober life! This thread is rather enlightening for a guy seeing as most here are ladies, and not much in the way of conversation embarrasses me. So, on the subject of hormones and menopause……

A couple of years ago, I started feeling rather sluggish, no energy, lost my desire for sex, just wasn’t sure if I was happy about life in general. I figured it was the damage I was doing to my body with my dear friend Budweiser, or my thyroid med needed adjusting, so I figured I’d better go see Doc for a physical and complete set of bloodwork. Of course I wasn’t going to tell him that I knew I had a drinking problem, that would be admitting to some sort of failure, and I thought he’s the doctor, let him figure it out for himself. Well, he listened to my woes, did my physical, and sent me away to the lab to give up what seemed like half my blood! A week or so later, I got a call from the clinic that Doc wanted to set up a follow-up visit! Oh no, what terrible disease did I have, how bad did AL ruin my internal organs? Turns out I was experiencing manopause! My body was producing less testosterone and that’s why I was feeling the way I was, but go figure, everything else was fine, no liver damage, no terrible disease. He could put me on HRT or I could just give it some time and let my body adjust to the changes, things would eventually return to normal. He was right, after about 6 months, my energy came back, so did my libido (thank you Lord!) and so did my positive attitude. One would think that the experience would have made me think about my drinking, but of course it didn’t, my Doc was none the wiser, an open ticket to carry on! So you see ladies, even though what you go through is much more symptomatic, us men go through it as well! But it did give me more compassion for anyone going through it! Just a bit of humorous trivia as I got up an hour too early!!

As I was thinking about my gratitude post this morning, I realized a new word to describe my sobriety! Not think of it as a struggle, a battle, or a fight, but think of it as freedom! I was a slave to AL, I did whatever my Master wanted! Once I broke those chains of servitude, I was free! Free from the clutches of AL! No longer did it control my day, control my outlook on life, I was free to be the person that I wanted to be. I want to share this new found freedom with as many people as I can!

So my friends, enjoy your day, and your freedom!

[Dottie Belle]

Hi all,
I got up wanting to go to our church but I just dont think I am ready yet. I cant sit there and remember all the things we did together and not cry....just cant do it.
So no clue what I will do today. It i totally empty and that scares me. Being here all alone is no good either. what a mess...
I am hoping that the counselor can give me some way to cope day to day. I am so lost. I am not sure I can ever do the same things we used to do. Flea market yesterday was really hard and just looking around here makes me sad. I cant even touch his desk. Went through his emails last night and sent the bad news to a few of his friends that I didn't have emails for. I was alone for so many years before I met him and the last 20 have been the best of my life. Now alone again is just so painful...

[NoSugar]

I was alone for so many years before I met him and the last 20 have been the best of my life. Now alone again is just so painful...

Dottie, you must miss your husband terribly and notice his absence constantly.

I've talked often about Viktor Frankl's book, Man's Search for Meaning. He lost all of his family in the holocaust, something that is almost impossible to imagine. Much of what he wrote concerned how a person manages to truly live after experiencing such great loss. This part has always stuck with me and I think about it not just in the face of death but in light of any change that I'm resisting. I hope it can help you, too, to think about how what you and he had is still real and can never be taken from you.

What you have experienced, no power on earth can take from you. Not only our experiences, but all we have done, whatever great thoughts we may have had, and all we have suffered, all this is not lost, though it is past; we have brought it into being. Having been is also a kind of being, and perhaps the surest kind

You're in our hearts and thoughts, Dottie. NS

[Dottie Belle]

Thanks NS...
Having a bad day. Sad and alone....

[NoSugar]

Please call a friend, Dottie. People want to help but are sometimes afraid to seem pushy or intrusive. I bet your friends would be so pleased if you showed them how they can help you. xx

[treetops]

Hi there Dottie. Here is a big hug from New Zealand! If you can talk to someone or just be with someone it might help as NS said.
Try to do some routine things like eating, washing etc. Don't fret about the big stuff.
Xxxxx

[scottish lass]

Dottie - don't try not to cry, it is not bad to cry.....can you take the dogs out for a walk?? Maybe somewhere different for a wee break, i am sure doing similar things as you did with your hubby must be really tough...

TT - blue eyeshadow ((((shiver)))) yes, I have memories! And my daughter wanted to do some night sky thing with a pair of cut offs - I was just imagining the mess!!! Good for you for doing it. I had a bad work situation that resolved last Wed and I am so grateful now - hopefully yours will sort out for the best too.

Pav - you need to let your friend know that material things don't matter nearly so much as self preservation and self like...still working on the second, but I am getting there..

Spring is in the air - my oldest has got the worst hayfever ever!!! She looked terrible this morning - a total mess, poor girl...

[narilly]

Dottie, I am thinking about you. I can't imagine the loneliness you feel. Big hug from me.
Can you call a friend to just have a visit? I wish I could come over and have a coffee with you.

Hey SL, that is pretty impressive that you have been so financially astute since you were so young. Pretty amazing.

Pat, I am glad your diet is working for you. I hve been doing this lchf diet, which is similar to Paleo and feel pretty good. I will see what my blood work says.
I find that B Complex vitamins help me with being tired. I actually notice when I run out of them.

Yes Pav, son is in Thailand and loving it. I know he is having a great time. That is one place I want to go. You and Ava have beat me there.

Have a great day everyone.

[Dottie Belle]

Several of my friends called today and I put out a request for hugs on FB and so many people responded. I feel better than I did earlier today.
I have lots to do tomorrow so that will keep me busy. And I can only do so much so we shall see. Lawyer is first to see what I have to do about the darn RV title. And call the tax gal and see if I can move my appointment until next week. I have to let go of this type A thing and chill or I will go face down too. Then what would my fur babies do....

[available]

Dots you can only do so much but i can imagine that the busier you are the more you dont have time to think.

Your dogs need you, they give you unconditional love and you give it back. I know my dogs are so much happier with a sober me and they have both needed hospitalisation this year. They are, i am sure, as bewildered and saddened by what has happened as you are. I wish they could speak!

Sending you a huge hug Dots. You are in my thoughts.

[treetops]

Good to hear from you Dots and do what you can.
As for Thailand - I prefer not to relive my memories there from 1986. It was a very unfortunate time in my life and yes, AL featured - both my own and well as the way others' addiction impacted on me. I also was hit upon by some truly ghastly men (racial background irrelevant). Strange, cos I travelled in India and even Burma with no problems. Went to Thailand again in 1996 - it was better.
Thats the past though...

[little beagle]

Today we went and helped out a friend of my daughter's. She is having a really rough time and helping her seemed to make both my husband and myself appreciate things just a bit more.
The issue I have been having has to do with my work. I HAVE been doing tooooo much. So I told one of my most difficult jobs that I'm no longer able to clean for tgem. I hate doing that, but enough is enough. I'm actually looking forward to this week.
Thanks Jane. I have been thinking of you.
Dottie I'm glad you are here with us. NS always seems to find the right things to say. I wish it was as easy for me. Just know that I wish I could help make this easier for you.
I'm just glad that even though I go through periods of down time, it always turns around and looks up again.
Ava I know that last year I was worried about getting through Mardi Gras al free. This year I knew it was going to be a easy peasy. It was. And fun. Second time through is much easier. You'll enjoy your time with your mom in Thailand and the worry won't even be there.

[patrice]

Hi all,
Ava I too am meeting my mum in 4 weeks time in Bali .. Also going to be a sober holiday , my second one, the first was cambodia last year. I' went to Bali 2 years ago and basically drank beer the whole time.. This time, no way.
LB- it's so great to be able to help anyone out just cos you can...
It's raining here tonight, what a relief, so rare I feel like staying up to watch it!
Dot is it today you go back to the gym? I hope so xx
Take care all
Xx
Pat