Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[abcowboy]

Howdy gloamers, popping in this morning to say life is good, life is good! And since I know narilly won't toot her own horn, I'm also here to say

on your 11 month milestone nar!! One month to go to the birthday!

[scottish lass]

Oh Pat! So sorry!
Narilly - yeah - party time coming! (thanks for the reminder acb)
Pat - come hear and teach there was a good article on huffington post about some research on homework that I found interesting. TT - the grades are what the US system uses for college admin as well as some other scores. In UK I got "O" and "A" levels for my ability for to get further education, whereas here it is grade point average that plays a huge part for next steps.
I am sure Pav is in same way (or sees the future for her son), but my oldest is excluded from sports, dances and so many HS activities due to her grades, so even though she struggles and tries hard, she is not able to join in activities and has not for two years now - it is so disheartening....

[scottish lass]

http://www.alternet.org/education/why-more-and-more-parents-are-opting-their-kids-out-homework

[Dottie Belle]

HI all,
Had a major meltdown today with all the legal stuff. I just look at his picture and burst into tears.
I know the grief groups/counselor will help but I am just so lonely and lost without him. I lived alone for many years before I met him but that was before my life revolved around him/us. I am not having a good day.
Gym later might help....hope so.

[jane27]

Hi Gloamers,

Happy 11 months Nar! Can you believe in just one more we'll be raising a glass of lemonade to a whole year!

Pat, I hope the food poisoning is coming to an end. Its such a terrible feeling when it happens and it seems like its never going to end.

G, I'll bet that little old lady still remembers you! I'm glad you survived those days and have your sights on the sober life.

On the subject of school, I still have nightmares about it...being back in 10th grade at 40 years old. Middle and high school were terrible for me...I absorbed little. The material felt grossly out of context and felt like water passing through a strainer. I got by via my love for note taking. I took good notes and would often rewrite them to make them look nicer. I never grasped what studying was- nothing stuck and so there was no context to build on. For this reason I hated school and it impacted my entire life. It amazes me that A1 & A2 get by so well. I'm glad that they do.

Ava, Is Thailand a sure thing? I recall reading that you were saving up for it, but didn't know if it was a done deal. I have happy memories of your last trip. It was a monumental achievement and it was so nice that you were able to check in frequently. That trip was good, good stuff. And not just for you and your Mom- It spilled over onto many of us as well.

Dottie, You have been so strong and I'm grateful every time I see you post. Time is going to pass one way or the other, I think staying sober is essential to getting through these rough waters without getting lost in the waves. Big hug to you. Please keep talking to us.

My mystery illness is back. I have no energy and could sleep for most of the day. There is a big difference this time however, because I am coming off of 4-5 months of feeling quite well, and consistently. I just have to let it run its course and do the best I can. I'm lucky that I don't have a 9-5 job to worry about. That's a huge relief. My Mom called me up, and that's weighing on me. Its hard to separate out what might be dementia, alzheimers or just old age. I'm not surprised that she wasn't interested in anything going on with me. There were many off base comments like "I was pretty pissed that you dumped me to go off and quit drinking.". She stopped talking to me out of the blue in October of 2013. I quit drinking in January of 2014. She didn't even know about it until a month or 2 ago. Whatever. That was just one blip in a herd of a hundred. (throughout the conversation). Where would I begin? So I just did the best that I could, and when I got tired told her we'd talk another time.

I think abut my friends Mom that died last year and feel sore about it, like the world is not the same without her in it. First time I ever had a feeling like that about someone that passed away.

Sorry to be a bummer. Love to all, and fat hug to you Lil B. Rahul still hasn't posted since his accidental sip of vodka. He travels a lot, but I'm fearing the worst. I hope I'm wrong.

[scottish lass]

Jane - :hug:
I hope my quit buddy is just busy.....
Dottie - :hug:"s too. I just want to say that your posts are so strong and you are healing - it may not feel like it, and after a day when you feel you are gaining ground, a poorer day must feel like the pits. I am so impressed that even with all you are feeling your last sentence is huge - you have hope and you are living (not just surviving but living)- the gym when you feel this way is truly enormous!

[little beagle]

I too am so glad each time I see you posting on here Dottie. You're still hanging in there with us.
Jane I'm sorry you aren't feeling good. I hope it doesn't last as long this time.
Pat I has food poisoning not too long ago from mushrooms. Ohhhhh that hurts. I hope it passes off quickly for you.
SL it sounds so unfair to be excluded from fun activities because of grades when she is putting so much effort into her studies.
Narilly are you having tiger ice cream to celebrate that 11 month victory?

[Dottie Belle]

So much going on today. Still working on the contract to sell my parents house. The buyers had the inspection and I got the list of things they want fixed or $$$$ for. My realtor is going to see about some of them and I am just so tired of this. I need to make this work regardless. It is costing me money to let it sit....My parents would be so disappointed but mother is gone and dad has Alzheimer's and doesn't remember the house most of the time..sigh.....I haven't been to visit him in weeks. I know he will ask where my husband is and I will tell him and a few minutes later he will ask again. The nurses know my situation and they are keeping me informed. Just way too much going on..but I am not drinking......yeah me!

[NoSugar]

Yeah, you, Dottie :hug:.

[Pavati]

Hi, Gloamers:

Yeah, to you, Dottie. Yes, I believe I said role model earlier. I am so glad to see you posting here, going to the gym, and generally dealing through your sadness and anger.

TT - I'm in education in the US - the NZ system sounds great - I know where to research.

SL - I HATE that she can't participate. Maybe some place on the weekend for rec sports?

Pat - sorry for your sickness. I ended up at an emergency room once from food poisoning - thought I was going to die. Leaving a pot on the stove sounds like something I'd do.

Hope all is well, LB.

NARILLY! Can't wait to raise my glass of sparkling water to you. I heard a funny story on a podcast about the Calgary song from the '70s - made me think of you. Did you grow up there? Here's the song: https://youtu.be/WA5VnKimBRs

Jane - sorry you're not feeling well. Rahul has been in and out for a while. I think he'll be ok, but I do wish he and some others would post a bit more - I worry, too.

NS - Hope you're ok, too.

xo
Pav

[patrice]

Hiya,
Dotty- raising my ginger water to you!! Some days will be like stones but some will be like diamonds...
Jane - I hope you are feeling better, I think you've had lots of stress with your flooding etc..hope the weekend is kind to you
SL - it's ourageous that your daughter can't participate in sports, dances, Eca's etc. I work for an international school which loosely follows the British curriculum. There was one teacher recently who suggested penalizing those who weren't getting C's and above. That idea was ridiculed and shot down in. Flames immediately !! Even though I am a teacher, I hate the way education is so goal orientated and there is virtually no emphasis on Critical ThinkiNg Skills. I teach the International Baccalaureate program and that has a large focus on wholistic education like community and service and philosophy, critical thought and mindfulness. I love teaching that course!
Well I feel like a right plonker! I've used food poisoning many times as my go to excuse when I had a day or two off work but now reAlise I have never had food poisoning. It was the most painful thing ever! I was lucky to be in a private hospital in my own room with a great view but the staff weren't so great at English ( but lovely!) the brief on the bed said No Lactose so what arrives with dinner is a steamy cup of milky coffee..haha. Along with Tumeric fried fish..mmm, wouldn't hVe thought that would be great for a gastro patient.
Anyway, haven't eaten for days and I'm starving! Had lunch but that didn't stay down long.. Guess rice, yoghurt bananas are the way to go....

Hi Lil B, Pav, Narilly, NS, Ava and everyone else
Xx
Pat

[bear73]

hey everyone,just quick post before work - I'm gutted that I drank 2 glasses of wine yesterday.

I think i was hungry and tired,up since 545 and train on way home cancelled so not home until 20.00.I'm trying to work out what went wrong for me - group bonding missing out thing. Out of the blue - and I wanted more booze - I'm trying to focus on picking myself up/rather than beating myself up. I had over 50 days of sobriety - I let my ' i can just have 1' voice BS win .
I feel crap on a small amount and I don't want to make myself feel crap anymore.Long busy day at work today too.
Hope you're all good.

[treetops]

Looks like there are a few of us here are working in the education sector - yep me too. Hope you are feeling better Patrice. I totally agree with you on the homework front. Its different at senior high school here - although no more 'homework' - there are assignments they can do during school time and this often has to be completed at home too (especially if the kids don't make use of their study periods at school). My daughter was up until 2am last night finishing a paper but she was very motivated and seemed OK the next day.

SL - I guess balance between school and a social life etc is ideal. This doesn't always happen. Can your daughter get some time to have fun or relaxation on the weekend?

I spent two hours tonight just hanging out with daughter, chatting after a really really casual dinner. It was I think good, some deep stuff but also some laughs. I told her that I knew I would die or get very ill if I kept drinking and I did not want her to have to see me ill, or struggling with rehab, or be devastated by me dying too young and while she was young (as much as we can control such things). It was talking about Terry Pratchett's death and alzheimers that brought this on (told you it was deep).

Bear - don't know what to say - but just concentrate on the future and the positives. You stopped at two glasses and some of us here would have a hard time doing that. Thats not a justification or comparison and we are each responsible to ourselves. Next time make sure you eat regularly . Growl, growl, growl!! I usually carry some nuts or muesli bars with me when I know a decent meal will be some time away. Hope the day goes well.

Dot - great to see you busy. Of course you will feel so sad and overwhelmed - maybe also a bit angry about what life has dealt you as well. Make sure you have some company over the weekend.

Hope you are feeling a wee bit better too LB. Hi there to all you other lovely Gloamers - NS, Narilly, Jane, Ava and all others.

[Dottie Belle]

Morning ladies,
Slept a little better last night. Dreams were a little strange but I cant really remeber them all.
Tax lady today then a meeting with the train folks tonight.
Tomorrow an event at church.
I am trying to stay busy but I also dont want to leave the dogs alone all the time. They miss me and know something is not right with their world. And it will never be the same again.
I feel so cheated and yes mad that my future had been totally taken from me....
The gym is helping me in many ways.

[narilly]

Wow! 11 months, I didn't even realize, thank goodness Cowboy Is around. Thank you very much everyone.

Dottie, Glad you have found something that helps you. The gym is good, and it is healthy too. I am sure you feel cheated, I would feel that way too. It really sucks.

Jane, ya, I can imagine it still hurts about your mom's death. I can't imagine. I am really close to my mom and am kinda worried how I will handle it when she is gone. She is a young 80 right now.

Hey, all you teachers out there. What a tough job that is. both my parents were teachers. My mom loved it and my dad hated it so that was interesting.

Anyway, another sober Friday for me. Have a great day everyone.