Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[peppersnow]

Dottie, that sounds like a great way to spend your time. We used old seeds - like 3 years old, astually -- basil, tomatoes and peppers, and everything but the peppers have popped their little green heads out of the dirt. Will be rooting for your seeds as well. Glad you are feeling a bit better.

Jeez, Ava, that flight with your mom must have been completely terrifying! I laughed when you said you asked for a scotch (knowing you weren't serious). I'm glad you're home so you can hopefully relax a bit from your vacation!

Jane, that garden is beautiful. I never remember bulbs in the fall but you've inspired me. You must be in a warmer climate than me, though, as our trees don't even have leaves yet. Happy gardening!

:happy2:

[jane27]

OMG, just read about powdered alcohol.

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Powdered_alcohol

Have you guys heard about this? Makes my stomach turn. Kids think they're invincible. This is not a good thing.

Wishing everyone a good MAE.

[treetops]

Quick check in as its Sunday night here. Seems like some folk are getting their gardens ready. I have spring bulbs to plant and never got around to it - as I was distracted with other tasks. It will be spring soon if I don't get a move on. Trying to relax before a full day at work tomorrow. Hope the thing with your son went well Pav. My daughter was at a 48 hour movie making marathon all weekend - they got their entry in one minute late and so were disqualified! But I think she had lots of fun and made some new friends.

Big hello there also to SL:happy2: who hasn't posted here for a wee while.

[available]

Oh its nice to be home. Yes jane they did the PA announcement of a dr or nurse. It was funny as they asked me if i thought they should get a dr or nurse and i thought to myself "no a fecking hot air balloon ride would be better". FFS, hello YES! The good thing was we walked right through all the checks at the airport and customs. Mum is a lot better, acting like the Queen of Sheba on the lounge.

Pepper i also wanted a cigarette and one passenger said he would go out on the wing with me, very thoughtful of him and it was only -51 outside.

Having a quiet day and no work for another week. Mothers day next Sunday and my daughter turns 28 so that is something to look forward to then back to the grind.

[peppersnow]

Good morning, Gloamers!

Oh, Treetops, my heart is just breaking for your daughter and her friends, but I'm glad they weren't too disappointed. My kids are into movie-making as well and submit their stuff to contests, too, (Project 4 Awesome was the last time, I think) and I don't think my own daughter's reaction would have been as mature as your daughter's if she had missed the submission deadline. That's so great that she can focus on the fun she had!

I've been trying to post in the Nest now and then lately, as have set a goal of giving back more (which is a goal I've set before and failed). Anyway, I just wanted to share something I posted there this morning that read on a sobriety app on my phone that I liked, because it hit home for me: "An addict is someone who wants to be held while isolating. Addicts seem to be in a continual state of emotional conflict. We want that which is impossible. We want to be loved, but we don't want anyone to bother us." That was me. It's mind-blowing no how incredibly lonely we can feel even while with the people we love the most when we are drinking and hiding it. I wanted them, and I wanted my booze. But I didn't want them to interfere with my booze. I snuck drinking about 1000 times with my husband and kids when with them and it was SO lonely! Even though I wanted to be with them, I'd feel relieved if they left so I could openly drink.

My youngest daughter is on the front steps outside of our house right now on this fine sunny morning being musical...which is her favorite thing to do outside. She likes to figure out how to play songs on a banjo her grandma gave her. Right now with the windows open, I can hear her singing and playing Stairway to Heaven and it's actually really good. If I were still drinking, I'd have missed that because I'd still be sleeping or nursing a hangover while faking I didn't have one. And who doesn't want to hear Led Zeppelin on a BANJO? She's a also a David Bowie fan and has a killer banjo version of Major Tom. I love the reactions from neighbors walking their dogs, so outside to drink my coffee now and be serenaded. Have a nice day, all! :hug:

[treetops]

Haha Pepper I heard an interview with Alice Cooper yesterday (no I was not a great fan but he's great fun) saying that kids these days are ruining rock music with banjos and ukuleles. Of course he had to say it!
Good on your daughter. I love the diversity of music.
Good quote too about wanting to be loved but wanting to be alone - I don't think that's just common with people with alcohol problems. Very common in the area I work in.

[NoSugar]

Jane, it sounds like you're an avid gardener and the lilies are beautiful. We have a variety of day lilies all along our back fence - the various colors are amazingly. I planted what feels like a zillion zinnias today (my favorite garden flower) as well as various herbs, and some regular and Mexican sunflower seeds. I'm really hoping the latter make it. I saw them for the first time last year and thought they were gorgeous:

I am feeling the work - I'm stiff and I bet I'm going to be sore tomorrow. I love doing it though when it is sunny and hot so it's worth it. I'm glad you enjoy gardening, too, DB. We have to grab the good months in the Midwest, don't we???

Pepper, your resolution to "give back" in the nest is going to benefit others immensely (and is a great way to remind yourself why we did this in the first place!).

Wine used to be my "reward" after a long day of yard work - sitting back, surveying the progress we'd made, and having a drink. It all seemed so normal and civilized. And it would have been if I'd been able to stop there. This afternoon after we were done, I sat on the patio, soaking up the sun, and thought about how that was enough.

I hope you all had a lovely first weekend in May.

[Pavati]

Hi, All:

My son had a good time - they were a tad disorganized and I thought the Type A girl in the group was going to blow a gasket, but thank goodness for her as she pulled them all together in the end. I'm sure they didn't win (we couldn't stay for the awards), but they had a great time and learned a lot.

Pepper - that scene makes my heart melt. I love kids, I love music. Nothing better than mixing the two. What you posted certainly resonates with me - waiting for my kids to go to bed, leave me alone so I could drink more. Good thing there was never an emergency in the middle of the night...

All you gardeners! So jealous. One day I will make/have the time to at least grow some good veggies...

I am as sick as you can be from a cold. I agree, Jane, that doesn't sound nearly as bad as I feel. I get terrible, deep and persistent coughs. I called the dr today KNOWING what they'd say - take some OTC cough syrup, drink plenty of fluids, and get some sleep. I wanted them to offer a lung transplant, but no such luck. I feel like such a baby, but WAAAHHH... I used to drink with a cold - "helps me sleep." Absolutely NO interest now...

Another sober Sunday in the books. Hope you all have great weeks.

xo
Pav

[little beagle]

I use a squirt of dawn dish soap in a spray bottle filled with water. Kills those pesky aphids. Spray the plant down with dawn solution, let set for 5 minutescand rinse with cool water. Works on my hybiscus and my moon flowers.
Grat unhung weekend here. Hubby put the trellis back up that the storm blew down.Only on pepper plant casualty. Not too bad.
And a lovely matinée at the local theatre with my daughter for mother's day. A beautiful weekend.
Glad you made it home safe Ava.
Hope your cold is better Pav.
Pepper the banjo is a fun instrument. What a lovely morning.
Enjoy your gardens everyone.

[Dottie Belle]

I made the mistake of looking through the pictures on my computer tonight. I found so many pictures I had taken of him. He was so handsome and full of life. I took so many of him sleeping on the couch and doing silly things. My heart aches for him and the wonderful life we had. How cruel is life to have taken him from me. He was my life and future and I am having to attempt to live without him. I am living my worst nightmare and I just want to wake up and find that none of this was real but unfortunately I know all to well that this is real and horrid. I have had the love of my life and now I just dont know what life will bring me. But I need to be open to whatever it is. He would not want me to be alone and miserable. I never knew how much I could hurt.

[available]

[QUOTE=peppersnow;1610962]

I've been trying to post in the Nest now and then lately, as have set a goal of giving back more (which is a goal I've set before and failed). Anyway, I just wanted to share something I posted there this morning that read on a sobriety app on my phone that I liked, because it hit home for me: "An addict is someone who wants to be held while isolating. Addicts seem to be in a continual state of emotional conflict. We want that which is impossible. We want to be loved, but we don't want anyone to bother us." That was me. It's mind-blowing no how incredibly lonely we can feel even while with the people we love the most when we are drinking and hiding it. I wanted them, and I wanted my booze. But I didn't want them to interfere with my booze. I snuck drinking about 1000 times with my husband and kids when with them and it was SO lonely! Even though I wanted to be with them, I'd feel relieved if they left so I could openly drink.


Oh Pepper this really hit home with me. The isolation and the loneliness but wanting so badly to be there but not able to as al was way more important. I know i was loved by my family but why could a man not love me? So i drank and drank and drank. Now someone can love me for who i truly am, now i can be there 110% for my family. Now i am the person i have wanted to be for so very long and feck it feels good. And i have met a man so who knows what will happen but for now i am really happy. I never thought i deserved such happiness.

Oh NS if i had been drunk on that plane i would have been hysterical. People were looking at me as i was slapping mums face trying to rouse her but i was in control. I do also realise that when i asked for a scotch that there was no way it would have made anything better, it was a knee jerk reaction and even though the coffee was shite it did the job.

Today i feel relatively human but i am feeling a nap coming on. i am waiting to ring Robert to see how he is. I do miss him and i do need to organise this hot air balloon ride sooner rather than later. Not overly enthuses since i am petrified of heights but for him i will just pop a xanax and go into the wide blue or grey yonder. Never would i have considered this when i was a drunk.

I'm glad everyone is going well, would love to reply to everyone but time to call Robert and see if mum is breathing! She is much better though but she doesnt like being the patient!

xx

[jane27]

....need to organise this hot air balloon ride sooner rather than later. Not overly enthuses since i am petrified of heights but for him i will just pop a xanax and go into the wide blue or grey yonder. Never would i have considered this when i was a drunk.

Oh Boy! I hope you fare better than I did. We weren't even 75 feet high when I got dizzy, nauseous, sweaty. I spent the rest of the trip curled up in a ball at the bottom of the basket, fingers white knuckling the rim. Never occurred to me Id have that kind of reaction!

Wishing all a peaceful night (or a bright morning). xo

[treetops]

In my former life I went in a hot air balloon over the Masai Mara in Kenya. It was so magical seeing the animals running around below as we swept over the trees.
Not trying to show off - just to let you know that my life wasn't all doom and gloom!

Hope you feel a little better Dottie - you are grieving and rekindling memories - and it will hurt.

[jane27]

We have a Gloamer celebrating a year today!

Congratulations to Ginger!

[Ginger999]

Awww.... I think I'm more of a lurker on this thread than an actually contributor but I'll take the congrats happily, Jane.

I read this thread every day and always take away a pearl of wisdom from one or more of you amazing ladies/gents. Thank you for being here and being such great support!! Happy AF Monday everyone.