Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[scottish lass]

I shared a link a year ago - here is the follow up a year later.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/kelly-fitzgerald/6-things-i-learned-during-two-years-without-alcohol_b_7235048.html?ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000032

This is good to read.....did me good today:hug:

[treetops]

Hope you are feeling better today SL- you too Dots.

[little beagle]

Thank you for that post Jane. It was very well said and what I was thinking.
I thought today was gloomy here too, Dottie. I cleaned an outdoor living area in the middle of a huge thunderstorm. And it was so dark,I wasn't able to locate the light switches until I was slmost done. It rained do hard the water started to flood the area I was mopping. Fortunately it stopped before I was finished. And I found a turtle stuck in the water lines for the spa. I released him back to the green grass.
It was a fun day.

[narilly]

TT thanks for the article and you too SL, they were good ones. I like reading about AL, it helps me to remember why I quit.

A turtle on your lawn? That is so cool Lil B. We don't have turtles here.

I am going to sleep now. Goodnight everyone.

[scottish lass]

Poor little turtle!!!
Glad today is almost done - hoping tomorrow is a better one!
Good night (or day) ladies!

[Pavati]

Hi, all:

Well, it turns out that my husband's lump is the Big C. (I feel like I don't want to type the word, like I don't want to type the A word). We are numb and processing. All we know is that - we don't know how big, what type, etc. Naturally, the oncologist he was referred to is out of town, so it will be a while before we know anything. In the meantime, we are trying to act normal around family, etc., which is VERY hard to do.

I am exhausted and heading to bed. One thing I know for sure is that there is no farking way I would want a drink right now. I want my head on straight and clear for whatever is coming next.

Hugs,
Pav

[treetops]

Dear Pav, I am very sorry that you have this result and it will be hell waiting for the oncologist's prognosis and to see what the options are. I hope that you are not reading this tonight and that you manage to get some rest. It will be also be challenging I am sure to deal with your sons' reactions.
Yes you made the right call in not wanting a drink (or having one) and reminding yourself that you need a clear head in the days ahead. Take care of yourself my dear. And post here anytime. XXX

[available]

Hi Loamers

Pepper i am sorry to hear about your MIL, my thoughts are with you. My mum has everything planned, she knows i am not a planner at all.

Pav i was so hoping for a good result, god life sucks balls sometimes but take each day as it comes you cant do anything more. I look at how brave robert is and so admire his strength and determination. I know it doesnt make it any easier in the days and weeks to come. Fucking cancer is all i will say.

SL i am with you on hating full weekends, i really need some me time. Its funny but i thought when i stopped drinking that i would be so bored and now there never seems to be enough hours in the day. I couldnt even fit drinking in now if i wanted to which i dont.

Jane, how are those ducks, bet they are cute now. You are sounding good.

LB nothing better than snuggling with the dogs, they love winter. God turtles, i remember when the kids were little there was a turtle on the road and they made me stop and get it. we put it in the car and it was the smelliest animal i have ever encountered. Even the kids didnt want to keep it and they loved animals.

Dots, its cold and gloomy and horrible here also but winter is coming, sooner rather than later it seems.

TT its great isnt it to say you dont drink now and not worry what others think. I remember in my early days staring at wine, just so wanting a glass. now i would prefer to vomit than drink al. No deprivation with me, its just as satisfying to make a toast with a non al drink in a wine glass.

Hi Nar!

The man is coming over tonight so i have to think of what to cook or maybe i dont. Im tired. Its hard to have to think of someone else now but he has his advantages!

Take care loamers, stay strong
xx

[NoSugar]

Pav, I'm so sorry you didn't get the report you were hoping for. It just isn't what a person who is relatively young expects to deal with. Thank goodness there have been so many advancements in cancer treatment and that you live in an area with first-rate hospitals and clinics. When is Mr. P.'s next appointment?

Peppersnow, I somehow missed mentioning your post about your MIL. I'm sorry for your loss and am so glad your relationship had improved lately. You and Pav both are showing us how to deal with some of the toughest parts of life without the crutch of alcohol.

Love to both of you, NS

[peppersnow]

Pav I'm so sorry about your husband's diagnosis. The emotional and mental toll that cancer exacts from those it strikes and their loved ones -- the n not knowing, waiting, etc., is so cruel. I hope you are able to meet with the oncologist soon and get the answers you need. Not knowing what to prepare for is the worst, and I'll be thinking of you as you get through these days, especially without the pull of alcohol.

Thanks everyone for the sympathies regarding my MIL. Spent a lot of time at my MIL's house yesterday helping my SIL. We are a Native American family, but my SIL's kids aren't that interested in the culture and my family is, so she gave my kids and I all her beaded and sterling/turquoise jewelry, hair accessories, her regalia (dresses worn at pow-wows and ceremonies), etc. She was tiny so none of us will fit into the dresses, but otherwise my SIL was going to throw them out and I couldn't stand that idea. My kids also found all kinds of nick-nacks that they said were very special to them. I just purged my house of that kind of crap, and drew the line at the bowl of plastic fruit my oldest claimed was special to her (she already had two big boxes full of "special" things she can't live without). Then I felt bad and went back to get it, but I hid it in the garage and am going to stick it into a box when she moves back to college in the fall as her dorm-warming gift.

Nar and Jane, thanks for your posts re: the gossipy busy-bodies. I think you''re right, they hate having mirrors shown into their own faces. I think with this particular crowd of tongue-wagging PTA moms, the fact that I've fed into their stereotypes and they've always looked down on me doesn't help, but they only have power if I give it to them, right? There are worse things in life. And I'm happy sober, so f-them.

LB - it stormed here, too - but this morning when I tried to let the cat out (he wouldn't go) there was SNOW on my deck! What the hell? Even up here in the hinterlands that's bizarre for mid May. I just want summer NOW, thanks.

Take care, all!

[Dottie Belle]

Morning all,
Off to lunch with a lady from church who also lost her husband suddenly shortly after I did. I dont know her very well so this should be interesting.
Tonight dinner with a widow/widower group. Bad for the diet for sure. I will try to find something light on the menu but the salt is always an issue for me.
I am venturing out and each day is something new.
Cool and beautiful out today.
Pav I am so sorry about the diagnosis. You are correct that drinking wont help anything. We are all here for you.

[scottish lass]

Pav - so very sorry. I am here if I can do anything. We have talked often about a coffee and really willing if you need a shoulder....
I was really hoping for a different message yesterday and today, my thoughts and prayers are with you

[NoSugar]

Pepper,

I love silver and turquoise pieces - all the better when they have sentimental value. It's nice that your girls care about their past.

I've been thinking about the gossipers. I think people who notice generally do have a problem at some level themselves, even if not an outright addiction. The people who don't have one, can't imagine that it's any different than giving up any other thing that you react to negatively, and so probably wouldn't think it was a big deal one way or the other and would have no reason to talk about it. I've never heard gossip about peanut allergies!!

Feeling stereotyped is tough to take, though. The one you're referring to I think is proof that part of addiction is simply the biology of the person, not a sign of moral weakness. Native Americans had little or no addiction, obesity, diabetes, or heart disease before the introduction and rapid adoption of the standard American diet (including beverages...). The biology just can't evolve quickly enough to keep up with such rapid changes. Other native groups have similar experiences - another MWO friend told me that the same situation (and stereotypes) exists in Alaska.

You're living proof that biology isn't destiny. Actually, I think we all are. If we don't consume the thing we can't handle, we have the power, just like Pav's avatar says.

DB, it is wonderful to hear you say that each day brings something new :hug:.

[jane27]

Pav, My heart sank when I read your post. I'm thinking of you and confident that you guys will do everything possible to ensure the best outcome, which will hopefully be eradicating the damn c. Your Loamers family is here for you, rooting for you, and ready to support you in any way that we can. Big hugs xxx

[little beagle]

Yes Pav. We are here. You are in my thoughts.
Pepper I like turquoise and silver jewelry. My husband is from New Mexico and is Native American and Hispanic. His mother has some wonderful stuff. I think it's great your children are close to their culture. Hubby wishes he'd paid more attention as a child and learned spanish. Both his parents and all the elders spoke Spanish as well as English. Only half the children learned and even less of the grand children.