Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[treetops]

Quick hello here and congrats Nar. Thats fab! Sorry I have been quiet but preoccupied with a few matters.

Glad I am post menopause. I didn't really have any noticeable issues however during the peri-menopausal years. It was a breeze in comparison to the years of menstrual problems that I had from when I started up until I had a baby at 42 years. My hormonal problems really eased up after then but menopause did not finish until well into my 50s.
I used to use AL as a pain reliever in my menstrual days. Any excuse I guess but I recall it did help.

Hope otherwise you are all well!

[little beagle]

Quick check in.
Hubby's counseling session went well. He likes it!!!!

[treetops]

Thats great Lil B. Its a big step and might just be the turn-around he and you need.

[jane27]

Thinking back on the days when I drank even though I had the flu. I'm so glad those days are behind me. Feel like I got hit by a Mac truck after a busy weekend. Saw Russel Peters do his show Saturday night (he's a comedian). He was very funny. Yesterday had SIL-BIL & their kids over for a pool day. Everyone had a nice time.I lasted 5 days on the Master Cleanse and think I peeled off 5 lbs. Ofcourse some of that is probably water weight. Carb compulsion is back in full force. Its very helpful to have alcohol to reflect on for reference. I feel like I could use a vacation from worrying. Im sure Id worry about not worrying lol. Love to all

PS Nar, I love the wardrobe capsule idea. Are there any websites you recommend?

[narilly]

Lil B, that is great news. I hope he keeps on keeping on and you see improvements in both your lives. Kick that addiction in the Ass!

Jane, I just Googled Wardrobe Capsule. I don't know exactly which ones I looked at. Mostly Pinterest I think. Russell Peters is funny, I used to really like him until he started getting Gross. Now I don't really watch him but I know he can be hilarious.

Well, I am getting ready for my new job. Organizing, thinking about work clothes and how I am getting to work. Nice problems to have. Easy to organize when I am not drinking!

Have a great night everyone. Nice to see you TT.

[NoSugar]

Will you be able to walk to this job, Nar?

[little beagle]

Narilly I remember you talking about wa
king to work and thermal underwear. I can't remember how you phrased it but you said the weather forecast for the day said hiw much bundling up you needed to do. I still think about that.
I'm so happy you got the job.
Jane I sure could use a vacation from worrying too. I've been thinking about you lately.
Hubby made a dr. Appointment by himself today. His therapist is recommending meds along with the counseling. A complete blood work up, etc. I like the complete approach. I do have hope that this will work.

[Pavati]

Hi, All--

LB - So great about the counseling session and the dr appointment. Hope he keeps it up.

Nar - I remember your describing what you wore to walk to work in the middle of the winter. I always thought of little Maggie Simpson - when they put so many winter clothes on her she essentially becomes a star fish. I hope you still get to walk...

Just googled capsule wardrobe. I think that's pretty much how I live because I HATE shopping, so my tiny closet is pretty much just OLD (emphasis on old) favorites. But I DO mix and match.

TT - thanks for the view from the other side. I hope it goes ok for me, too.

Jane - I know you know this, but I'm going to type it anyway. "Worry does not empty tomorrow of its troubles, it empties today of its strength." Right? I sincerely alleviated a lot of my worrying by working very hard to accept that I can't control everything. It has been a revelation. And of course, I still worry, but so much less. For me, the words of the serenity prayer (minus the God part of the prayer for this non-religious person) - Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference - or something like that. Each part has a lot of meaning for me - it wasn't just realizing that I had to let go of what I couldn't change, but also that I needed to courage to change things I previously thought impossible to change. And the WISDOM to make the right choices.

Anyway - happy Monday, ladies (and gents).

xo
Pav

[narilly]

Pav, the words of serenity prayer are good. I need to remember to say that. Right now we are in a huge economic downturn and there are just things I cannot change, like oil price or the fact our house is not paid off. On the other hand, I can control how much I spend, my nutrition, what I do with my time, my attitude, whether I drink or not etc. I start work on Monday and I find myself thinking about money and how much I am going to make and that is isn't enough and blah blah blah....
Anyway, I have to calm my mind down and just stop thinking about things in the future. I love your quote "worry does not empty tomorrow of its troubles, it empties today of its strength". That is powerful.

Have a great Tuesday everyone. I am organizing my clothes and getting ready for the new job. I already found some nice pieces which I forgot I even had!

So glad to be Un Hung.

[jane27]

Pav, Thank you for writing it. Of course I know the words but I'm not sure if I ever really considered what they meant (weird). Your post made me realize that it can be used as a sorting tool & I like sorting! I guess its a relief to be able to categorize. As for today, I am feeling winded. I spoke with my Dad yesterday and he hasn't had a drink since February. Its almost impossible to believe. He says he made the decision because he was having problems feeling in his lower extremities- he referred to it as neuropathy - and that he feels it has improved since giving up drinking. Just last year he was sort of boasting about his station in life on the subject of alcohol (if it hasn't killed me at 75, I doubt its going to kill me now). I guess something scared him. He seems mostly the same- a little more down at times, a little bitter- but not too bad.
Wishing every one a great day. xoxo

[treetops]

Jane - thats great about your Dad. 75 is still youngish (well kind of) and the last thing one wants are AL complicated illnesses at any age. Plus the brain, the brain. It can only take so much AL abuse over the decades and we often forget this one - especially as dementia, memory loss gets so easily conflated with aging. Depression and bitterness seems to be something many elderly people experience - but not all elders by any means.

I was thinking about age and AL this morning. I thought how hard it must be to stop drinking when you are younger if its engrained in your lifestyle. I know from my own experience that it would have been tougher and I probably would not have had some of the fantastic experiences I did have, if I had cut myself off. This is not to condone drinking - just something I am looking back on. I guess thats why I have switched my position about AL in society from when I was newly sober. I was so anti-AL and I still wish it was not yet another destructive substance in society - but its there and its pervasive. I live with it, just as I live with other toxic things - some of which we do enjoy.

Last week I was at a work-related dinner and everyone except me (and a woman with an illness not related to AL) was drinking wine or beer. But they only had one drink each (I wasn't counting but I had to pay some of the bill!). One drink over two hours. Sure, some had had a few pre-dinner drinks but that was hours ago. The conversation was good and I just didn't care. I really felt that AL was not an issue for me (apart from the glasses I had to pay for, for others!) - I didn't notice it, much in the same way as I didn't notice it when others ate meat (I don't). I was asked about my vegetarianism rather than not drinking - and I said to friend "it just doesn't come into my life. I don't miss meat (how could I after almost 30 years red-meat free) and I have absolutely no desire to eat meat". And I thought my relationship with AL has come to that (I hope at least). Its not even about calling myself sober or a teetotaler - I don't use those words. I have been able to quit AL and most of the time - not miss it- and at that dinner - it just was not on my menu.
But if I was younger with a group of friends or about to be friends, if I was letting my hair down, planning to go out afterwards, maybe meet someone, stay up really late, be able to sleep in - how would I have been? At the same restaurant I was at, I could see groups of young people, especially women - doing just that. They were not causing a riot - they were having fun as far as I could see. Probably a few were not not drinking.
So I wonder about age, lifestyle and the reality of not drinking AL in many settings. Just a thought. I wonder if its harder to avoid drinking when we are younger. And why would you?

[NoSugar]

I didn't drink more than the very rare glass of wine (which at the time I didn't like but was trying to act like I had a clue about how the world worked) until my mid to late 30s. I went out with friends and had a good old time - just didn't drink. I agree with you though that it might be tougher to quit at a younger age, especially because with age, most people care less and less about what others think. That is my favorite part about getting older!

[Guitarista]

Yo Gloamer's!

Congratulations Narilly! Wishing you a bonza first day on the job.

TT, I sure had some gr8 times on the sauce as a youngster, but as I reflect, I know I would've fulfilled and respected my potential more, and kicked a lot more arse on the planet if I'd given up much earlier. When? I dunno. Either way, I sure don't dwell or regret my past in the main. Happy to be sober and present today.

Have a bewdy out there friends. :dancin:

[little beagle]

I too didn't start really drinking until my 30's. Honestly I probably wouldn't have but my husband did and he expected me to also. He actually gave me "lessons". But one thing is sure, I wouldn't have quit any sooner because I just wasn't ready to.
Jane I think it's great that you dad has quit. And I hope it brings the two of you closer. You have been on my mind a lot lately. I hope you are having fun with Red.

[jane27]

Hi Gloamers, LilB, glad to hear hubs' session went well, and nice to be in your thoughts too. Wishing everyone a good night. Xoxo