Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[jane27]

Jane! Oh dear oh dear.. What a mess.
I am speechless, vent away.
Whatever you need to do, you certainly dont need your hd to behave like a moron right now. Perhaps he could save it all up and then take a little holiday! Like to Peru or someplace nice and far off....

Just to make sure you understand El (and I think you do), the mess is a hiccup, the attitude is the problem. This dog would have to kill a baby to really upset me (and there is no chance of that happening). He's a puppy. A beautiful, intelligent, emotional and loving puppy. And no one is going to damage him while I'm on watch. I WILL admit we're going through a learning curve. Peru sounds perfect. Thanks for making me laugh! xxxxx

[j-vo]

SL, I think everyone is different in hoe much support they need. For me, I have the opportunity to sneak online during short breaks at work, and when I'm not busy in the evenings which is almost never now that son is driving and basketball has not started, I have the time in the evening. As a full time professional, single mom, and two teenage girls I can understand how your time is limited! Just post when you can to keep sobriety on your mind and to let us know you're ok.

El, my MIL is a getting older, is older, and things that we don't have time to worry about, well she does. Yes, it's early to put the tree up, but it actually put that holiday spark in me and holidays have been nothing but difficult for me due to social anxieties , depression and drinking. So I think I may take advantage of this feeling and start to decorate a bit early too. We're having thanksgiving, Xmas, and a special get together with some special friends for mom this year as she has ALS and we want to make things special for her.

[NoSugar]

Your empathy for your MIL is very touching J-vo. It probably meant so much to her that you helped put up the tree without a fuss. And you did it without a numbing drink :smile:!

Everyone uses MWO differently so who's to say what is right? Plus it changes over time for each of us. I've seen too many examples of people coming back after disconnecting entirely to risk that, though (unless I had an alternative source of support). I can barely remember what my life was like even with participating here. I'm sure it would fade into a distant memory if I didn't actively keep it in mind. And that seems to be when the trouble starts.

[little beagle]

It's starting to be the Really busy time for me. Starting next week.
Jane puppies are energetic. Mine sure is. My house is a l most always torn up. Looks like a bomb went off sometimes. I know it won't last.
I'm going to visit family for Thanksgiving. And I'm really glad Al won't be part of that visit.
I'm really enjoying how busy this thread has been lately.

[Choices]

Have a bit of time to post, my daughter is transfixed on max and ruby, a cartoon for anyone that doesn't know all the episodes by heart. Feeling really good and just wanted to thank everyone for your support. I really needed help and I feel so lucky that I could turn here and crumble in a safe place. Thoughts today are about how much more energy and time I seam to have. It feels wonderful not to have a hangover and to have a clear head. Nothing is in the too hard basket at the moment, so I'm enjoying this space.

[scottish lass]

Thanks for the support - I know you guys are all ok with how things roll, I need to give myself permission to be ok with it:welldone:
I actually had a huge struggle to get home tonight - I have not had a good day, woke up grumpy and it did not improve. I was planning to pick up fresh fruit and bread for supper, and as I drove the long drive home I managed to keep working out why it was ok to get wine too. If I had not come back here, I would have done it - I am delighted to say, holding myself accountable to checking in, I have got home, doors locked, raided the freezer for supper and will keep my 14 days intact! Thank you Gloamers - I know I will be delighted tomorrow....crappy day does not need to equal wine....why does my stupid mind disagree???

[Choices]

Way to go SL! I know that bad day, just going to pick up a few things... And oh yeah.. Might as well get some wine... I've had a day of it. Not an easy habit to say not tonight to. Sorry you had a bad day. I hope your evening goes better. You can count on being delighted tomorrow morning for sure.

[treetops]

Hang on in there Choices and SL. I think as you know the pull to buy wine at these vulnerable times diminishes over time- at least it did for me.
My hardest moment this year was when I was in Hong Kong in June, alone in a hotel room, extremely tired, jet lagged and dealing long-distance with a colleague's sudden death and some unsuppportive fallout from this. I was very emotional. I couldn't contact my NZ friends and family because of the time difference. I briefly thought about AL and just giving up on myself and the responsibilities I have, but didn't want to go there. Somehow I processed what was going on to myself and managed to compensate the next day with some manic shopping.

Sorry you are having hubby dissonance - Jane - I most definitely know the feeling.

As for teenagers Choices -I wouldn't worry.They get far too much bad press and there are a lot of stupid generalizations made about them. I also disagree that girls are harder to deal with than boys. Its often an individual and cultural thing and not all girls are high maintenance. You will have heartaches and worries and maybe major problems- but you can't predict this. My daughter has been lovely to grow along with. You have lots of great years ahead.

[j-vo]

Good morning Gloamers,
I got to sleep in a bit this morning because we have parent/teacher conferences today. So we go in for two sessions and will end this evening at 8:00. I think I could get used to sleeping in. Love these unhung mornings with my coffee and doggy.

It sounds as though everyone is doing well. LB, I too, and grateful this thread is going strong.

I've been lazy this morning, and now it's time to get myself going. Have a great day and I'll check back tomorrow.

[narilly]

Good morning everyone! I am totally enjoying my Un Hung morning with my coffee and 'paper' which is really my ipad Mini. Soon it will be my Coffee and doggy, just like JVo. YES! I am getting a Daschund and his name is Elvis. I am SO excited, the little fella will be coming to my house Dec 14th. I have wanted a little wiener dog for years so this is great.


I can still clearly remember waking up hungover every morning with wine mouth and a headache ALL the time. Every morning I would say to myself "ok, no wine tonight" and I would then proceed to drink again. I don't miss that. It is so cool after being sober for awhile, I don't feel the pull I used to feel when I had a bad day or am tired. It just isn't the first thing that comes to my mind anymore. I guess it just takes some sober time to get here. I am still vigilant though. I don't want to go back. Hang in there SL, Choices, everyone, it does get better.

SL, I hear ya on the Sugar thing. Have you listened to Ivor Cummings. I have watched all his videos. Wow, he is very interesting plus has a great Irish accent.

JVo, I read your post a few pages ago about stages we go through in life and that is so true. My hubby is working now. Which is freakin awesome and he is So happy with his job. He flys in and flys out of Fort McMurray, 7 days here and 7 days at work. He really enjoys the job and is super happy plus is making some good money. I am working, we are getting a dog, kids are good and getting good marks in University, mom is healthy...I am counting my blessings right now. Life is great. The best part is that I am Sober and I can enjoy my life.

Have a good one. It is Rememberance Day in Canada. Time to pay our respects.

[NoSugar]

Maybe Elvis should be Ivor, Nar! I love his accent, too. I could listen to him lecture about anything :wink:!

[scottish lass]

GOOD MORNING ALL!!
Beautiful morning here and grumpy has vanished! So had to shout out.
Just got into office - early as no school today so no fussing to get everyone up and out - just me - gt out of bed 30 mins later and still left 30 mins early! Roads clear.
Sun is out - treated myself to a starbucks and choc croissant for teh ride to work - lots of things made me smile on the way - puffed up hawk, girl with bouncy ponytail jogging across bridge, Adeles new song!
Hopefully today will be a good one and my frame of mind will last - would not be like this if I had succumbed last night now would it!
Hope you are all having a great day too lovely Ladies and Gents! Going to crack down to work and maybe get out a little early...

[lifechange]

Hey Gloamers!
so glad to be here..
Sounds like a fabulous morning, SL.. super after having a bit of a difficult time yesterday! It's just what I needed to hear, as I'm not having the best evening. Drinking hasn't really crossed my mind.. but I do feel some sort of possible lurking thoughts.. which I'm shoving out the door.

Nar, you're so lucky to be getting a little Elvis. I love Dachshunds. They are soooo cute. Is he a puppy?

J-vo, I can't wait for the weekend and a long morning at home.. I've been up at 5 so that I can get in my meditation, which is wonderful, but doesn't leave me much time to spend with you all..
I'm so enjoying being in your company again.. It's definitely helping me to keep things in perspective and stay on track-

ok. Off to dinner with friends. I've somehow been talked into showing a group of friends how to make home-made pasta.. which is easy, but I'm dead dog tired. This group is made up of my best friends who know I don't drink.. who wouldn't let me drink if I stomped my feet and begged or offered to pay them 5000, euros. But still, I'm so tired I don't know how I'll be able to converse! I think I'll just listen tonight..

will check in later. hugs to you all.

[lifechange]

Now I'm back and everything went well. Though I realise that I was quite stressed out ahead of time. Just about life and my ex again.
On the walk over I listened to music and found I was looking for something to take away my unease. A coffee? A cigarette (i don't even smoke)? A drink? entered my mind for 2 seconds but I still have fresh in my mind how terrible that would make me feel. I finally ended up sitting up on a bench in the park, turning off the music and asking myself what exactly was the cause of my discomfort? It felt good to just sit with it. It really did pass.. not immediately, but it eased. Then I was somehow able to move on to a list of what I have to be grateful for. Which is a hell of a lot.
This sitting with discomfort and not trying to have "control" of a situation or how a person is acting is my main work right now. I think those are my top 2 reasons for needing to escape.. until now with alcohol.

I'm so incredibly relieved and happy to be going to sleep at the end of day 6 with a clear mind.. and so looking forward to a delicious coffee in the morning.

[j-vo]

Is liked how you just plopped yourself down on the beach and sat with your discomfort then follow up with gratitude list. Love that and will use that tool. Thanks LC.