Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[starty]

Merry Christmas Gloamers. Hope you all have a magical day xx

[Choices]

Hi everyone and thanks for the support., your trip away sounds so nice TT.

It was a long day here for sure. My husband came back around 12 pm and then, because everyone had planned this dinner and it was pretty much all prepared we just went back to my SILs and opened gifts ... Etc..

My SIL was pretty tipsy and was drinking a huge glass of wine next to me. It smelled really bad. There wasn't a lot of drinking, but everyone of age was drinking. My MIL said to me that I would have to be the one to drive her home, because I was the only one not drinking. I felt so good that I could be her safe place. (She wasn't drinking). I just told her absolutely, And that that was one of the good things about not drinking. She just nodded.

I really felt for her. She has been with her husband for almost 50 years and me him at 16. She is a nurse so actually was doing CPR on him until the ambulance came. As the day went on, I could see her becoming more stressed out. She kept trying to call him, but couldn't get through. He doesn't have a cell phone...

So I suggested we just go and see him again before visiting hours were over. SIL didn't really like this, but I got my husband to step in and long story short...we left and went to the hospital. My husband drove.. He had nursed two beers for about 5 hours.. But it was really good I was clear headed.. Because my MIL was in a bit of a daze, my husband was too, and we of course had my girl with us.. Just a real time to be sober.

Anyway.. I found my FILs room and got to see him. He looked good. Just uncomfortable. But he could talk, and my MiL finally seamed calm. My daughter was a bit scared to see her grandad in a hospital bed with all the tubes etc.. And I was glad I could hold her, comfort her, and make her feel safe. She also became bored so I was glad I could take her for a walk around the ward and see the Christmas decorations. I am relieved everything turned out to be alright.

Hopefully FIL will be discharged tomorrow. It felt appropriate to be sober, I also felt like I was competent and could help when I could,,, if I had been hungover or drunk.. I would have become one of the things that needed to be dealt with.. Instead of dealing with things.

During Christmas Day watching the drinking, which wasn't in excess at all I did crave a bit.. But I think that's just the habit part of the whole thing lingering. Pav.. I agree I am just getting sick of all the drinking.. It's all a bit much even watching the normies.

[j-vo]

Merry Xmas to my Glimmering Gloamers. Have a blessed day!

[lifechange]

Merry Christmas, Beauties!

Choices, I'm so glad you could be fully present, with all your capabilities in tact.. Like you said, I love this, you were able to help with solutions instead of being one of the problems..

I'm with you and Pav right now, as far as being a bit fed up with all the alcohol. It's difficult for me not to be judgemental.. "WHY do you NEED to drink?".. but I have to try and remember that some people can enjoy a couple of sips with dinner.. go figure! Not my reality.. and I am proud of myself for finally being really honest about it.
Today, for a couple of minutes and for no reason, I felt like going out an buying a bottle of wine. I didn't even try and fool myself with enjoying it.. I knew I'd hide it, down it, have to go out for more.. crazy. Instead I had a nap, made a coffee, didn't go out for the bubbly water I really wanted-- I'm safe to go now..
I don't like how the thoughts come out of nowhere.. but as we are all learning, they are just thoughts that we don't have to/should not! act on.

We're about to eat a bit of dinner and then maybe play some games.. let's see.. wishing you all well!

[Choices]

Merry Christmas everyone. Boxing Day here now. I am really happy that I don't drink. I hope things are going alright for you Jvo. LC I know, the random thoughts are annoying, but your right they are just thoughts. My husband is in a really good mood. I'm very grateful we were able to go on this little holiday. He's really beginning to relax and chill out. Everyone is coming here later on to go to the beach and do some surfing. We have tons of left overs.. So I don't need to worry about food at all. It's a lot sunnier today too.. So should be a god day. I hope my FIL was able to sleep last night, as well as my MIL. I'm glad I'm posting as much as I can it is helping for sure on the remembering I don't drink front.

[treetops]

Choices you will never regret being sober on Xmas Day now. I hope the FIL is on the mend as best as can be.
LC - I don't begrudge others drinking. In fact I bought my partner some wine but he only had 2 small glasses. My daughter had juice (usually forbidden in our house cos of the sugar) and I had sparkling water at our Xmas lunch. Each to their own. It's the way people behave that annoys me more. But I also hate sitting near wine when I can smell it. Yuk. Imagine if you started smoking at the table and blew it over people s faces! Used to happen.
Too much chocolate but a big hike planned for today. Hugs to all.

[Choices]

A hike sounds wonderful TT. I am really thinking I could live in this beach town. It is so relaxing. We had a really good time at the beach, and then back at our Bach for lunch. FIL wasn't able to be discharged. He stopped breathing twice during the night. So it was just the nieces and nephews, one niece is married and the couple apparently drink a lot. They mentioned getting some beer.. My first instinct was to tell them where to buy it.. But I just decided they could figure that out and I didn't need to be helpful on that front. They didn't end up getting anything. And to be honest I was glad. Funny., it was mostly because I didn't want to smell it. Or deal with the empty bottles. Yuck. And.. I'm just so aware of my early days this time. Not going to mess around with any false starts again! Hubs is out betting on the races and probably having a couple of beers. Not a worry for me... Only the breath.. It's so hot here.. My girl is asleep. Pure bliss for me as I know she had a big day in the sun playing and happy.. I can hear the birds and people laughing and playing in the water as I lay in bed windows open with the early evening summer sun. I don't want to go home tomorrow. Hopefully hubs wins big at the races and we can come back a few times this season. (Joking.. I don't know how much he spends on the races.., it's more of a novelty on Boxing Day for him.... And it's something he does with his dad. I hope everyone is having a good holiday!

[j-vo]

Good morning. Day after Xmas here. We visited mom and dad's neighbor's and had a nice four hours sitting and talking. I was very aware of the time, as I usually get antsy, and drunk after being in the same place for that long. But I noticed how relaxed I was, not needing to leave for any reason, whether it be to be able to drink more, or afraid that I'd drunk too much and looked stupid. No, it was pleasant conversation, good food, and I felt good. Grateful.

Choices, you also were aware of the the advantages of not drinking when visiting FIL. I think we need to always be aware of these situations, not take them for granted because they will give us more reason to stay sober. We need to keep building our sober memories.

LC, glad you let those thoughts just pass!

Nar, how Elvis?

Mom is doing ok. Her voice is really bad now. I guess some of the muscles in her throat and tongue are paralyzingly, and it's really hard for her to talk. When she does talk, it sounds like a person who is slurring their words, although it's also a bit scratchy. Mom and Dad were grateful for me coming down to be with them for the holiday, and I'm glad I could be here for them. Dad will have a chance to get out and golf this week, and he hasn't done for awhile.

Pav, I hope those fires get under control. It didn't look good on the news. The tornadoes also hitting Alabama is terrible as well. Again, we can't take anything for granted.

TT, I hate the smell of alcohol on people's breath and I can only imagine what my smelled like. CRINGE. But you're right. IT's others behaviors that can be annoying, and not the drink. Last night when we visited parents neighbor's, they had one here and there, not annoying at all. It wasn't the focus of the evening.

Have a great day all.

[Pavati]

Hi All:

Happy Boxing Day! Happy you could be with your parents, J-Vo. Choices, glad you could be sober for your whole family.

I had a fine time, glad it is over, and will be cleaning up for days. Now onward to some clean up, some work, and some relaxing.

Pav

[little beagle]

We had a very tropical Christmas here. Shorts and t-shirts. Air conditioning on all week.
Choices I feel happy for you. That's a great sober memory. A real reason for not drinking. Congratulations.
J-vo I think of you daily. I'm glad you got to be with your family for the holiday.
Narilly that Elvis sure is a cutie.
My daughter came vor Christmas dinner. It was good to see her.

[NoSugar]

I'm so glad you saw your daughter on Christmas, LB! I hope this is the return of peace and love for the two of you. Our Christmas was much less tense than a year ago and I am so grateful. Not all relationships will be perfect but there needs to be kindness and respect - and hopefully forgiveness for past hurts.

Choices and J, isn't it just the best to be part of the solution instead of the problem???

LC, it is great to hear how much you're enjoying your sober Christmas :hug:.

You're lucky to have gotten outdoors, Pav and TT. Chilly and rainy here. If it had been cold, we would have had a TON of snow. That would have been kind of fun but travel would have been awful.

Hope you're enjoying Elvis, Nar!

xx, NS

[j-vo]

Merry Xmas Soft Focus:happy2:

I posted this in the nest...

Last night we went to the community
restaurant, and lots of people were having wine, beer...I did catch myself looking at it, wondering about it (not that I would have drank), but just thinking are they feeling pleasantly buzzed now? That's not a good thing to do, and it leads one to the feeling of deprivation.

I woke up this morning also thinking of how many times my son had seen me trashed, and it upset me. I thought about specific times that I'd upset him. I know I can't change the past, but I can make sure that it never happens again. But still...

Memories will always be there. I guess it's up to us to just let them pass though our minds and move on.

Have a good day Gloamers.

[lifechange]

Hi Gloamers!

Just checking in to say hello.. I'm feeling like about a buck o five today but I know it's hormonal so I'm letting it pass.. slept a lot, drank an extra coffee.. watched a film, read a lot..

Glad to see you are all well and enjoyed Christmas..
will check in again tomorrow..

[little beagle]

Thanks NS.
J-vo you'll always have those memories, but you'll also have more sober memories. That's helped me feel much better about everything.
Hubby's mom had about 4 feet of snow overnight. She lives in New Mexico. I was thinking of all the mud that will makecas it melts. Yuck!

[Choices]

Quick check in.. I haven't been able to post all day.. we had a guest from out of town.