Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[j-vo]

Thinking of you, LB. Call this weekend if you need to chat, or even if you don't need to chat, I'm here. Text. Whatever. I'm putting extra prayers in for you.

TT, our husbands, for the most part are good and have good intentions. I know I get too sensitive, especially on the drinking subject. Maybe if it were another subject, I wouldn't have attacked him. But this is a huge change, so I must make him realize that. He's only human and can forget the horrible shit I put him through. Good luck to your daughter next week when she starts her classes.

For the first time in 24 years, I woke up an hour late. The only time I was truly late to work was when there was an ice storm. Tonight, we are going to dinner, then down to Pitt to watch my work school district in the basketball finals. It's a big deal and I'm really excited for them. (Not son's team just to clarify. If it was our school district's team, I'd be a crazy, excited mess!!). Today is also the day a lot of my coworkers are going out. It doesn't happen often, but this one is big. I'm glad I have the excuse that I'm going to the basketball game instead, because they all know that's going on too.

Have a good Friday all.

[little beagle]

Beautiful sunny day today. I'm starting to feel a bit better. I went out to lunch with a friend and laughed.
Thanks for such great support everyone

[treetops]

Great to see that you got onto things yesterday when you were feeling blue. The company of a friend and/or a close family member can make so much difference. These people know you and love you. Laughter, even when we are sad or depressed can also IMO be a life saver. Its part of being human.

[NoSugar]

J-vo, I thought of you last night when I went to a HS B'ball game, too (sports at that level can be so much fun), and was so glad you were doing that instead of going to a wine tasting. I've been to a couple fundraising ones since I quit drinking --- talk about BORING! And, if people really were there to compare wines, they would be spitting it out, not drinking as many dixie cups full as possible! I'm convinced the pretension and posturing (along with the ridiculous adjectives used) at wine tastings can be tolerated for long only by those who've drunk enough to no longer care.

I hope your whole day has been a good one, LB :hug:. Living in limbo as you are right now is a tough thing. It's good you're seeing how strong and resilient you really are, that many people care about you, and that you'll be fine no matter what. I hope your husband can become the man you need and deserve.

Life is full here. I just commented on another thread that there's no way I could have pulled this off drinking. I suppose I would have just missed many of the lovely opportunities I've had and not met the responsibilities, leaving them to other more competent family members. What awful thoughts -and wasted life.

I hope all GLoamers are doing well. :heart: NS

[Pavati]

Hi, Gloamers:

My life has been FULL, too, NS. Sorry I haven't been checking in everyone.

J-Vo - So sorry about your mother. What a terrible disease. My dad is losing it cognitively. We used to have lively political discussions, talk about anything and everything, and slowly but surely he is slipping away from me. I realize that I miss our talks even though I see him all the time - it is almost like he is a completely different person who needs me in a completely different way. Not as dramatic or traumatic as ALS, but I still morn for him. I see him get confused and not know where/when to jump in to a conversation.

Love the waffle, Jane.

LB - So sorry for what's going on. I am glad you talked it out, and it sounds like you have a good plan AND a good attitude about it.

Off to work, kids' sports and family dinner. Happy Sober Sunday,

Pav

[j-vo]

I've had trouble logging onto MWO last night and today. Glad to be back.

LB, glad you're feeling better, friend. You deserve to be happy, so treat yourself well. No one can make you happy (3 P's) except yourself, and no one can make you angry. But...you can choose to be around the people that make you feel good and appreciate you.

NS, so glad you had a great time this weekend. I still have concession duty this coming Friday as the state games are still going on, but not for my home district. We're hosting my work district, and that's always fun to see the kids. Got to see lots of former students Friday night at Pitt and it was great. Nope, couldn't have done that had I been snooty wine tasting and getting snooty drunk.

Pav, that is heartbreaking, too. To know that don't have the mental capacity they once did, and engage in the conversations like you did in the past is soooo sad. Hugs for you, my lady.:hug: At least you don't have to talk about jackass Donald trump!!! Sorry if I offended anyone, but he doesn't care when he offends anyone. Ever.

Hi TT and all Gloamers!!

[treetops]

Hi there Gloamers - I too couldn't get on last night and was rather worried about the site.

JVo- you haven't offended me, to the contrary! We are not supposed to talk about politics on MWO and its not my country anyway - but as someone from afar I am rather worried about what is happening in the US this year, to say the least! It affects us all. I see he is quoting Mussolini now.
OK - I will poke my head in later.

[little beagle]

Glad we are up and running again. Thanks for all the support.

[narilly]

Hello everyone,

Sounds like we are all hangin in there. Glad you are feeling a little better Lil B. Slowly but surely the sun will start to shine again.

I had a big talk about booze last night with my son. He agrees that he has the same gene as me and has to be careful. This is HUGE! I am so grateful he recognizes it. It took me so long to believe I had a problem with AL, at least he has learned something from me. Hopefully he won't go down the long road of binge drinking like I did. He told me he hasn't drank for 2 weeks and that it was hard for him to have just one. He said he didn't like feeling like crap because he went out and had 10 beers. I guess he inherited my bad hangover genes.

Have a good one everybody.

[little beagle]

J-vo I watched my first episode of Intervention. I have to say it really is putting this whole thing into a new perspective.

[narilly]

Good Morning Gloamers. I am having a hard time coming over here to post these days, I am not sure why. I know I have to keep my support group close because that is key in my sobriety. There have been many times in the past 2 years where I really felt the pull and I probably would have drank but I did not want to come here and confess that I drank.
I think it is important to keep our connection and to keep supporting each other because there will be times where we really need it. Dr. Kelly (from the Bubble Hour) said that group support was key in keeping sober over the long term.

Stay sober Gloamers. Grateful we are here for each other.

[NoSugar]

Hi, Narilly

I think it's easy when we're feeling strong to drift away but just like recovery is contagious, so is dissociating, I think. There is less to respond to these days when there aren't many posts and most of us don't have much to say about our (blissfully boring w/o the addiction drama :wink day-to-day lives. It's great that none of us seem to be needing support right now but I know that I am more able to work up the energy to engage if someone seems to need a word of encouragement. That lack of connection is a risk, though - I know I feel stronger when I'm committed to something bigger than myself. And I think you're right that if we lose the connections, we're not as likely to ask for help if we need it or think to come here instead of making a bad choice. I'm not sure what the answer is but I sure don't want any of us to drink!

xx, NS

[blink]

checking in for that feeling of connection. lots of small things that are going wrong, some that are potentially large but im telling myself im just being hysterical. trying to sort things out are frustrating when no one answers calls or call you back. makes me start thinking why bother? let everything fall apart fall down go overdrawn. i havent drunk. it feels like i should put a 'yet', but i doubt it really. dont like that my stupid brain is even entertaining the idea though.

[NoSugar]

It is wonderful to hear from you Blink-Roxy (for any of you Gloamers who didn't realize it, Roxane had to change her name to get re-registered in this silly system).

Being hysterical is different from feeling overwhelmed with too much to deal with and it sounds like that's what you've got. I'm sorry you've got so much going on. Please try to deal with what's actually happening instead of what might happen (says the one who can catastrophize with the best of them :subdued

I get you on the not calling back. I am trying to pay people to help us with a couple projects and no one calls back! Do they not need the money? The economy isn't so great here but it sure seems like "small" projects (that are big to us) aren't considered worth it. It is so frustrating. And worse if what you're dealing with is more important like a medical issue.

You should be a GLoamer because Gloamers don't drink :smile: - that should take care of the dang "yet". You've gone through a lot without drinking since you quit and have forged those new neural pathways. I bet they are stronger than you think. But it sounds like you realize the old bad one still is there, waiting to be fired up. Please don't give it that chance - it's just not worth having to go through all of this again. xx, NS

[treetops]

Hi there Blink (and NS) - anxiety is one of the enemies of people who abuse AL and often worry is at the heart of anxiety. Like NS I try not to do this but I still worry a lot. I have to do a lot of future planning in my job and its often far from a rational prediction! My way of dealing with this is to try to make little roads into the problem - i.e. do something concrete and gather my facts and deal with my options. But this doesn't always help at 3am in the middle of the night. I try to think about totally non-related things at such times.
What I do know is that being sober really helps me deal with worry - things are far more manageable without the toxic input of AL. Drinking is just like pouring oil on a fire.
Its really frustrating when we have to wait for others to get back to us - I check my emails far too often! These kind of seemingly little niggles can build up and feel overwhelming - again, not great for people like us. Thats why its really good to let things out and we do that a lot here on the Gloamers thread.
As for the' dang' - its never enough - one drink doesn't cut the mustard and even if we think we have our drinking under control, it creeps back up. I am sure you know that well enough. For me, removing AL off the table made a huge difference. Life is far from perfect, surprises (good and bad) hit us all at some time.
Excuse the cliches - its breakfast time where I live and listening to the radio encourages this style of speech!