Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[little beagle]

Love the beach. I haven't been able to go for so long.

[Pie]

Huge shout out to Myluck on the occasion of her 3rd AF anniversary! Couldn't be happier for you, my friend!!

[NoSugar]

Way to go, MyLuck - so happy for you!

[little beagle]

I love to see these milestones. Congratulations My Luck. You're awesome!!!!

[available]

Happy 3 years ML. a great number there!

Nice to see you LB, i hope everything has settled down for you and life is on a more even keel.

Yes we definitely need to get loamers moving again. Im keen as mustard.

Love to all

[abcowboy]

A big congrats on 3 years MyLuck!

[Myluck]

Thank you ❤️

[Myluck]

Thank you LB ����

[Myluck]

Thank you ��

[Guitarista]

Congratulations My luck! Wow!

[Pavati]

Wahoo, MyLuck! Hope life is full of hot yoga and fun.

LB - sorry you haven't been to the beach - I know you love it there, as do I. I live very close and was luck to get there this weekend and hang out with friends, see fabulous sunsets, and forget about everything for a while.

My loamer topic today (notice I left the G out of this one...) the joys of hormones in the middle aged years. WTF?! I feel like I am 13 again - moody, tired, achy, can't sleep, and sort of foggy. Blech. Thank goodness I'm not drinking through this as well.

Back to our regularly scheduled programming - Mr. G, glad to see you pop by. I love your enthusiasm.

My son is working through a lot of drinking right now. He's young and experimenting, and I think he went too far last night and doesn't feel very good about himself. I am happy to say that he has some good friends and will get through it with a good head on his shoulders. He is a real thinker and has a lot of emotional intelligence which can be hard to navigate. I hope he is safe.

OK, Gloamers. Hope all is well.

xo
Pav

[NoSugar]

My loamer topic today (notice I left the G out of this one...) the joys of hormones in the middle aged years. WTF?! I feel like I am 13 again - moody, tired, achy, can't sleep, and sort of foggy. Blech. Thank goodness I'm not drinking through this as well.

I did drink through that stage of my life, Pav, and it was NOT pretty. I blamed the 3 a.m. sweats on my hormones and while they might have played a role, they weren't the main cause - alcohol was. I used menopause as my excuse for that as well as for falling asleep/passing out on the floor in front of the t.v. each evening, feeling poorly, bad memory, etc. It probably looks to my family and friends like I had the worst change ever but the fact that I am finally able to admit to myself is that most of my misery was due to nightly drinking. You are really fortunate to have stopped first.

It sounds like you've got your head in a very good place for dealing with your son's introduction to drinking. I just wish that it weren't so culturally ingrained that fun depends on somehow altering our minds. I know of course that this isn't true for everyone but it is pervasive enough to be a serious problem. I hope your son stays safe, too. xx, NS

[NoSugar]

LB, I also miss the beach! Our family situation has changed such that a long drive to a coast doesn't work out so well anymore for a group trip. Maybe my husband and I will have to take the plunge and go one of these days.

So, I know there's no way you're drinking but have wondered how you're doing otherwise with all the recent ups and downs. I think of you often. xx, NS

[NoSugar]

Re: Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

When J-vo re-started this thread on 12/10/13, she listed these active posters:

FreeFly
Narilly
Dottie Belle
available
Pavati
patrice
Running4life
Rosie57
HumbleRider
acadiaofmaine
K9Lover
Scottish Lass
NoSugar

I miss you all!!! ...And Mr G, Treetops, Eloise, Lifechange, Jane, LittleBeagle, Starfish1, Gifaffe, Roxane, SweetPea, Wagmore, MossRose, Kailey, Peppersnow, Cowboy, Choices, Nora, MyLuck and others who posted on this thread a little or a lot over the almost 3 years it was active.

I miss knowing about your lives and the ongoing support we offered one another. And we had some pretty great success! Many of us continue to be contentedly AF and others have NOT given up trying. And that is the most important thing!

Maybe some of you want to re-commit to this mission we're on or maybe some new people would like to join us. The community we had made the experience of overcoming addiction (almost :smile fun. I've been reminded recently about the importance of not drifting too far from a sober community - and I think this was a good one.

In any case, I hope you all are well and living the lives you want and deserve. It would be great to hear from you. xx, NS

[NoSugar]

Re: Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

So, here's my update:

A few days shy of 49 months AF - feels good and normal. In fact, I have a hard time remembering what my life really was like 5-10 years ago. Feels like it wasn't even me (and in many ways, it wasn't!). I can intellectually go through what my days were like but I can only catch glimpses of the crushing feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, fear, and shame that had become constant. I know that's how it was, though, and I could no longer experience joy, gratitude, anticipation, excitement, or any of the other positive feelings that most people take for granted. Until they lose them.

So... do I miss drinking? No. I miss the escape. I miss the feeling of that first drink on a long-empty stomach (and deprived brain). I occasionally miss being one of a happy drinking crowd.

But the escape had become so brief - and even during the first drink I was anticipating the regrets and illness that I knew were coming. There was no longer any peaceful oblivion.

Drinking without eating was idiotic. I knew it but pretended otherwise. And drinking excessively was so at odds with all of my other efforts to maximize my health.

I still have my friends who drink. When they drink a lot, it really isn't all that much fun for me because they slowly drift into that alcohol haze that makes no sense at all to someone who isn't there. I get bored. Interestingly though, all of them drink much less than they used to. I wasn't the ring-leader but when not everyone is doing something, I think it makes everyone question what is going on and why. Plus, we're all getting to ages where health can't be taken for granted anymore - it takes effort!

I'm working, appreciating my husband, enjoying being able to spend time with grown kids and their kids (without making excuses as to why I can't visit or babysit or whatever...), and becoming involved again with issues that matter to me and activities I enjoy. I do things in the evening again - what a concept! Over the years I'd managed to adjust my life to being done with any responsibilities by 4 -5 pm. My days are at least 6 hours longer than they used to be!

I don't doubt my memory or ideas anymore and no longer assume I'm the one who forgot or misunderstood. I stand up for myself again and sometimes we do things My Way. Or we compromise. I don't always defer to others anymore.

I'm glad to be available to help a person in need any day, any time. And to not resent them for needing me.

I'm really upset about the world, and this country in particular, right now. I know many people who are responding to events by drinking more. If I hadn't quit entirely, I suspect that would have been my reaction. Instead, I'm getting involved. And that feels good. I'm so grateful to be sober, taking some action (even when symbolic) and not just whining about what a mess we are in.

I am so grateful to once again be a fully functioning person. It's shocking from this vantage point to realize how much "function" I'd lost.

Take care, NS