Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[paulywogg]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi all,Thailand sounds fun,hopefully you and your mom can have a good visit together this time,overcast and dreary here in vegas today bleh,hope everybodys friday goes good

[j-vo]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi girls,
Lunchtime here. TGIF!

How ya doing today SL?

Pav, what a great night out with your girlfriends. I hope I get to that point. I'm feeling it might be easier than I thought awhile back.

Ava, Thailand! Sounds so great, and this'll be a chance for you and mom to really talk. How wonderful to hear!

I hope everyone has a great friday. I have basketball tonight, so may do a quick check in later. Love you all.

[NoSugar]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

paulywogg;1620699 wrote: I will hang with you guys more,after all i am a lady,and i have a mission,lets do it

jane27;1620817 wrote: Hi SL, Even though I haven't been vocal on this thread, after reading your post I wanted to weigh in.Hope you stick around, Pauly and Jane. For whatever reason, people who are posting here are having really good success. I hope people who are reading but not posting are, too, but we don't get to know about that. It's nice to get a chance to witness success .

narilly;1620704 wrote:
My husband finally figured his crap out and we have worked things out. It always a work in progress of course.

scottish lass;1620728 wrote: I will try to keep leaning, I am used to being the leanee, need to be the leaner a bit and glad to have you to do it with....:l

These are the big lessons for me - letting other people figure out their own lives without my feeling the need to try to orchestrate things so everyone is happy and as part of that, always acting like I am fine and can handle all of whatever is going on with no problem. I've been a mediator in too many relationships and am now learning to back off and let those other guys just duke it out. Or not.

There was a lot to read this morning - love it! Really, you guys are much more interesting and entertaining than the newspapers - even when we are discussing hard subjects, you give me important things to think about. Pav, your openness with your friends inspires me - I know that getting over the shame I feel about this part of my life is important. SL, Nar, and Ava, your stories about relationships remind me to do the work that any relationship requires and to make sure that both people are being treated the way they should be. It is so easy to take things for granted and to be careless with other people's feelings.

Have a great weekend not drinking, Loamers! Enjoy every minute. xx, NS

[NoSugar]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

jane27;1620985 wrote: Thanks NS. I'm in. Going away for a short vaca and will have limited access, but I will be popping in even if for just a quick hello. Thankfully I did an AF free trip to Florida during my quit of 2 years ago. I'm humbly optimistic that I'll get through it just fine. Because I want to & because of you guys.

You know, Jane, I took a few AF vacations before I gave up drinking - I didn't find it hard not to drink when I was away from my normal life. Those trips gave me a glimpse of how wonderful my life could really be it I could quit for good. Now my life is an eternal vacation... (Well, maybe NOT :H but it sure is about 10 times better than it was and my stress levels are so much lower, it is almost like a vacation!)

Narilly is going on a trip next week, too. I hope you both have a wonderful time - just remember that a drink won't really improve anything and the way you feel about yourself the morning after you didn't drink is priceless.

This is Narilly :

[scottish lass]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

checking in - thank you for all the support and telepathic hugs - they mean a lot, truly do.
I a sorry to say that today will be day 1 - but it will be day 1.
Pav - I did try the DIY divorce - but that takes two and even though he needs to divorce (thing he is on his thrid or fourth girlfriend) he did not do his part of the paperwork so that is why I had to go to a lawyer. Just need to keep on trucking and making a better life for the three of us...
Ava - your trip sounds wonderful - I had my 50th very, very quietly 21 months ago....
I for sure do not look anything like Narilly this morning, but I don't even when I haven't been drinking night before - however, I will wake up better tomorrow morning and many mornings after that.
Patrice - I will step in your footprints - I will be trotting along right behind you....

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Morning Loamers!
Great posts to read.
Thank you NS for sharing. Yes, everyday is a learning day here for sure.

J-Vo, you are sounding great.
Pav, Awesome you were able to talk like that to your friends. My best friend texted me last night and wants to go on a 2 day get away for our 50th. This will be in April. My birthday is on the 24th of April Ava. What is yours? I think we had this conversation before.
I am going to tell my friend that I don't want to drink on our weekend. I will have to work on being AF that weekend. She is the person I started drinking with and it has been a big part of our lives. But we have other things like shopping, exercising, eating, talking etc. that we can do instead of drinking.

SL, I hope you are feeling a bit better today. It's a new day right? Sorry that FWad is messing up your life so much.
Seriously, I would have done something really bad to my husband I was so angry. My counsellor gave me some tools to deal with that. She said "the anger will come and you have to know how to deal with it" I am so glad she told me that, because seriously I would have killed him. Really. I was THAT angry. It scared the crap out of me.
The anger came after the sadness. I have never cried so much or heard myself cry so loud. (I did this when I was alone) I would just sob, it was terrible. I could feel my heart beating in my chest.
Honestly, I think I had a nervous breakdown. They say that most people do have a breakdown in these situations, its just not labelled that way.
Pauly and Jane, keep posting.
Humble, I am glad you like my FWad definition! Lol! It is a good one if I do say so myself!
Ava, April 24th if you missed it above, that's my big 50th.

Dottie, Beagle(love your pic), everyone. Have a great Sober day!

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

SL, Day 1 it is. Let's start again, no problem! We are with you Sista!.

NS, I LOVE the picture! Yes, that is me!!! Except my Duvet is a Chocolate Brown and I am a little darker that that Girly...I am more of a beige person..lol.
As soon as I don't have a dog (which will probably be never) I will Have a White Duvet Cover!
Thank you for that.

[NoSugar]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

narilly;1620994 wrote: SL, Day 1 it is. Let's start again, no problem! We are with you Sista!.

NS, I LOVE the picture! Yes, that is me!!! Except my Duvet is a Chocolate Brown and I am a little darker that that Girly...I am more of a beige person..lol.
As soon as I don't have a dog (which will probably be never) I will Have a White Duvet Cover!
Thank you for that.

Ok ok but you're still blissfully and deeply asleep after not drinking the night before !

[narilly]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

LOVE that!!
NS, you are the Best!

Here is an article I found interesting.

Vodka kills Russian men by the thousands, says study | Health & Fitness | Life | Toronto Sun

Yes, the stuff is poison.

[Starfish1]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hi Ladies :l

Gee, I think I missed reading yesterday evening and feel like I have been gone for ages. So many great posts.
Jane, :l I am so glad you are going to join in the great conversation here. This thread gets better and better! Hi Pauly! Glad to see you too!

Ava- Thailand! I can't imagine! That's awesome, girl...we have something to look forward to!

Nar- you crack me up, FWad :H

I have been spending more time reading and posting in the nest this week, trying to help Byrdie. Lots of fun, but a little more time consuming. It takes me so long to read all the posts and then when I finally finish, it seems everyone has already said what I was going to say, so it's difficult to come up with something new. Guess I shouldn't worry about it. I think even though we may all be saying the same thing over and over again, one person may add a slightly different twist and strike a different cord with someone. You never know.

I have been SO VERY TIRED this week. I really believe its all part of the process. I had a few itchy spots and rashes too. I am sure its just all the poison leaving my system. I am taking it as a good sign that I am on the mend.

I have also been very busy at work this week. What a drag. But I am not sure I shared the latest about my "runaway daughter"....Night before last, the friend who we have suspected has been harboring her this past month sent a message to me over facebook telling me how fed up she is with my daughter's behavior. Now this is supposed to be her "best friend in the whole world" and even she is now beginning to see problems. WOW!!! Actually, this is probably the best scenario of all. Now the friend sees the trouble with my dtr and if she can't help us get help for her, perhaps my dtr will at least listen to her friend, since she would not listen to her family. I think this is progress (I choose to think of it that way). Thanks for all the support you have given me during this past month, ladies- I really appreciate it.

Stay strong everyone! Fresh start, SL :l

xoxo Star

[NoSugar]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Starfish1;1621007 wrote:
I have been spending more time reading and posting in the nest this week, trying to help Byrdie. Lots of fun, but a little more time consuming. It takes me so long to read all the posts and then when I finally finish, it seems everyone has already said what I was going to say, so it's difficult to come up with something new. Guess I shouldn't worry about it. I think even though we may all be saying the same thing over and over again, one person may add a slightly different twist and strike a different cord with someone. You never know.
I think that is exactly right, Star - the message pretty much remains the same but each person's take on things is individual and what resonates with one person might not with another. I don't think it is possible to overstate how much better life is free of an addiction - we need to SHOUT it out and whisper it in one another's ear. You never know what someone will be able to hear best.

I have been SO VERY TIRED this week. I really believe its all part of the process. I had a few itchy spots and rashes too. I am sure its just all the poison leaving my system. I am taking it as a good sign that I am on the mend.

Are you still restricting sugar and sugary carbs? That can make you feel very, very tired at the beginning. For one thing, your body has to shift its metabolic machinery to burn fat instead of carbs (doesn't happen overnight) and, when you restrict carbs, insulin goes down and that often results in increased urination (hence, the quick water weight loss characteristic of low carb diets). If you notice that you're peeing more, you might want to increase your salt intake a bit. I found drinking a cup or two of normal salt chicken or vegetable broth worked wonders.

WOW!!! Actually, this is probably the best scenario of all. Now the friend sees the trouble with my dtr and if she can't help us get help for her, perhaps my dtr will at least listen to her friend, since she would not listen to her family. I think this is progress (I choose to think of it that way).

It sounds like you have hope for her. That is wonderful. You are being so strong in what is such a stressful situation. :l:l:l

[Starfish1]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Thanks, NS

Yes, I am still restricting carbs and decided this morning that I will add some more veggies to the diet. I also think (yesterday, at least) I may not be drinking enough (WATER!!!) It has been so cold, I just don't drink enough. I had not thought of the broth though. I have some at home and will drink some tonight.
I only went to the gym once this week, due to being so tired, but I figure at this early stage of the game, I need to pamper myself and not force myself to do junk I really am not in the mood for...that would set the stage for disaster, I'm afraid...so my reward for not drinking yesterday was not having to go to the gym feeling like I had been run over by a truck. Worked out pretty well. That bed felt much better than a bottle!

[HumbleRider]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Humble Waking Up

http://static.blipfotos.com/thumbs/g....54082010.jpeg

This is more like me when I wake up. I still can't figure out how to get the photos to show up, but here is the link. Can someone message me with how to do that? The normal way I'm used to just doesn't work at this forum. Nar, NS has you looking so fresh and lovely in the mornings. It's 90 days for me, and LB suggested I do something nice for myself, which I hadn't considered. So now I'm trying to think of what to do. Of course in the past, I would treat myself to a drunken stupor and raging hangover, so now I have to think of something else. Will check in later, I'm supposed to be working.

[Starfish1]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

:jumpwow::jumpwow::jumpwow:

HR has 90 Days!

Congratulations! And you definitely should do something special for yourself! Thanks for all the support you have given us the past 3 months. We love you!

[available]

Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

Hello loamers, well cuppa in hand and ready to face the 35 degree day. I want to go to the markets to get some fruit and vege but need to go early so hoping my daughter wakes soon as we are going to spend a few hours together which will be lovely.

Pat hello there, hope everything is going well with you, i really wasnt going to kill you, i dont kill people i love. I do so love thailand and the shopping and i think by april i will need a break. This will be mums last trip i think as she is 78 this year.

LB yes i agree planning is paramount to a holiday but damn i loved sitting around the pool at 9.30 drinking cocktails and they are sooooooooo cheap and i have it in my head that my mother will be enough to make me drink after a few days but i need to change these thoughts and i dont need al in a drink to make it taste nice. I am going to relax not to get pissed.

Jane i have been waiting for 5 years for karma to hit the Jwad i was with after my ex husband and still hasnt hit him but patience is a virtue so they say. How long is your mini vacation? Think positive about no al, funny how normal people dont even have to wonder how they are going to get through not drinking and us it is a huge focus. I plan on checking in twice a day when i am away and i dont care how much the net costs to do it. Lead me not into temptation............

Pauly hello, dreary, i cant imagine Las Vegas every being dreary. My mothers and my visit never ends well but hopefully things will change, i dont want her to die with things left unsaid and although she comes from a long living family you never know and may wake up one day and its all too late.

Jvo gees your energetic with all your basketball you are doing or would that be your lovely son ha ha! Yes lovely i totally agree with what you said and i hope i am as strong as you have been with your parents. We cant be afraid of rejection forever especially at our age.

NS doesnt Nar look refreshed and happy and no sign of any dribble, i wish i could look like that at nearly 50. I wonder what face cream she uses. I totally agree that we are having some great success on here as a group and always a different topic of interesting conversation every day be it deep or just everyday life, everything makes me think. Not sure i like all these emotions coming to the surface though, they seem to have been bottled (literally) for years and years, always trying to make everyone happy while i was slowly dying inside but the positive is i am not dying inside anymore, i am living as we all should be.

SL i am sure you look beautiful just like we all do in the mornings. I was worried about my 50th birthday party the kids want to have also so April is a big month for me but i wont let me or the children down ever again, i just cant do it to them, i cant be weak as i am strong now. Glad you feel a bit better but just take it day by day and you know what put the divorce papers in a draw for a bit and think about you and the girls. Your ex sounds like mine, very needy, cant be by himself, always needs some poor sucker to look after him and emotionally stunted. He feels sorry for me as i am single, blah i say, i am happy alone, i dont need a man if he wont be one. Mind you after saying that i do still have a lot of affection for my ex, more so now he is not with me! I left our divorce up to him and suffice to say we are still married but it does not worry me, as i tell everyone i have been happily married for 22 years and thats due to living in different states. Keep trotting SL you will eventually canter through life and jump those hurdles! xx

Nar, we are getting old we are allowed to repeat ourselves. Mine is the same day as Hitlers, woo hoo. 20th april. My kids say there is a reason for sharing a birthday with him!. I think your friend will understand you are not drinking and support you, my sil said she was so proud when i told her i was not drinking but it was me i was worried about with drinking, god i must send her that email and explain why i did not visit her when she was down but that was early days also. I was thinking about what you said about your husband and his affair, you are such a strong woman, me personally i would have kicked him out even if i loved him but that was then. No one hurts me, the wall goes up and off i would have gone in my own world, not ready to work things out. I had a nervous breakdown after a guy i was with screwed around on me and told me everything in minute detail. I like you could not stop crying, lost 12kgs in two weeks, could not stop shaking and just wanted to die. Funny how our will to live wins out. Now i am waiting for karma to bite him on the arse! I had a white duvet Nar and dogs trashed it and what wrinkle cream do you use, i so want some please.

Star i love your avatar and i love the "we" have a trip and it is we really, we all have to plan this holiday together. I like heading over to the NN and reading and throw in a post if i think it will help, probably doesnt but some posts hit a cord, some people i want to slap too lol. TIRED god i was so bone tired from about 2 weeks to the 4th and then i could not sleep, fark that was difficult but i also had such bad headaches and like you i just kept thinking the al has been poured down my throat for years so what do i expect. I expected to look like NS's picture thats what, mmm still not happening. I hope things work out with your daughter, it doesnt matter how old they are we still love them unconditionally, now if only they could realise that mother knows best.

HUMBLE 90 FECKING days woo hoo to you girl that is wonderful news and now you can start writing the 100 day speech that we expect. You made me laugh with your drunken stupor comment, at least we knew what we were doing to celebrate every single day of our lives, thank god that changed is all i can say. Very proud of your achievement and cant wait for the long speech. God help you all when Pav makes hers! Lovely NS pm'd me how to do pics and yep you guessed it i still cant do it. Probably for the best really.

Be strong Jane and the torture we put ourselves through thinking about al is probably in reality not going to happen. Stay on those toes girl and keep checking in. We know you can do this. But most importantly have fun and enjoy your break.

I just so love waking up to everyones posts in the morning, it gives me the boost i need to start the day and lately my motivation has been lacking greatly. I looked on the laptop this morning to see what day i was up to and FFS its the 1st Feb and now i am totally confused as before i was one day more than the day but in saying that i gave up on the 1st December and now it is the 1st of Feb. Bloody unbelievable is aall i can say that i could be af for this amount of time, as i keep saying it seems like it is someone else. My daughter is now semi-awake whatever that means so i best get going before the heat kills every part of my being. Better the heat than al.

Take care everyone and you guys mean the world to me. I hope i havent left anyone out, i hate that.