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    Just to let you know that I haven't taken off anywhere and I am definitely not drinking or thinking of drinking. Just very busy and preoccupied with various things. I an finding that its important for my own calmness to not go on-line as much as I have in the past - because it distracts me and eats up too much time. Sometimes I feel as if I am not achieving much and I feel sluggish if I spend too much time on websites (or Facebook) on the computer - partly because so much of my work has to be on the computer. The key for me is staying focused - and that was also a key in my sobriety. But I will pop in when I can and try to check in most days. Its sometimes hard to keep up with everyone's doings and tries and tribulations but I do my best - and try to offer little bits of support to others, as people have been really good to me on MWO.
    Just because we don't post much - it doesn't always mean the worst! We are not all harboring drinking desires - and I have opportunities most days to indulge if I want to. Drinking is not what I do anymore. People do change and I have great faith in the ability to change and move on. Not saying its easy though. Anyway I certainly don't believe in that old saying about a leopard never changes its spots.
    I am very sorry you lost your job Narilly. Thats so hard.
    Everyone take care - it must be Friday for most of you - Saturday morning of an autumn here!
    Last edited by treetops; April 17, 2015, 02:29 PM.

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      I agree it doesn't mean the worst, TT, and we shouldn't assume anyone who is quiet is drinking. I certainly don't assume that -- I know several people who have left MWO for one reason or another and are doing fine. My point is that if there isn't posting, there's no energy, and for me anyway, on online site wouldn't cut it for the reasons I mentioned. I'd need to find a different venue to keep myself on track and not take my current life for granted.

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        Thanks TT, glad to see ya poppin in.

        NS, I have had those same thoughts. Especially lately. I was thinking I could go have wine with my neighbor on a hot day outside, just once and then I would be done. No one would know. But then I thought, if I do that once I will do it again and again and then pretty soon I will be drinking on work nights and then waking up with hang overs. Ugh. I so enjoy not having hangovers. Love being UN Hung and the only way for me to be that way is not to drink.

        Have a great sober Friday night. The Calgary Flames Hockey team are in the Stanley Cup playoffs and so everyone is hockey crazy around here. There is a game tonight. Go Flames Go!
        Narilly

        "Nothing in this World Can take the place of Persistence"
        "You can have the life you want OR you can Drink"

        AF April 12, 2014

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          Nar, sorry to hear about your job. Not sure about the details, but very sorry !!

          No visiting the neighbour for wine, you can have chilled mint tea and it will be even more relaxing than wine.
          We all know how not relaxing wine is.

          Things are sort of getting better for me at home? Not entirely sure, I guess if you look at the big picture it is better.
          (AF since 17 May 2014) 2 years 5 months sober

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            Thanks NS, Nar and Eloise.
            Please don't get me wrong but I need the site too - I don't have a support group here and I absolutely agree that it helps to keep you accountable. Its weird though because with an internet site cos no one can eyeball you and see if you are telling the truth or not. But we all know that when people drunk-post its often a give-away.
            I also like sharing new information and if possible, now and again, giving some support.
            I do know what you mean about the temptation to drink a little - and not mention it here. I guess what kept me going in the first year, was knowing how ghastly it would be for me to try and quit again. I knew I could quit again (because I had a few big long quits before this last quit) and I actually don't agree with some folk that it gets harder to quit each time - for everyone (maybe some but not all). Psychologically its very demoralizing - but the thing is with each quit, you actually have more self awareness and have learned how to quit. In my case, with my final quit, I had reached the end of my own road with drinking (not rock bottom) and that was it for me. It was a relationship I was really over. Yet, I still get nervous about how I would cope with a truly awful crisis or loss. I don't worry about drinking anymore when I am alone, or travelling, and I don't have the desire to drink to celebrate (like at someone's adding or anniversary). I can think of a million other ways of celebrating!

            Eloise - keep your eye on the big picture!

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              Hi - I am here too - I had an internet free three days, and it made me so aware how much time I spend on the computer, so have chosen to switch off in the evening which is my prime viewing time, and engage with family - not sure how much they appreciate it mind you!
              I do read briefly - but I don't feel I have much to say, and I am enjoying my unplugged time.
              Nar - so sorry about the job
              TT - Happy birthday!
              NS - I have too thought of just the same experiment...
              Pav (and Ava) happy 500's!
              Up to eyeballs in spreadsheets - so not a good place for a nurse, so popped on to waste time and clear my head a bit, so saying hello.
              “The only courage you will ever need is the courage to live the life you want"

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                Sold our RV to a local dealer today. My neighbor drove it for me. Got an OK price. I so hated to do this but what good is it to me without him. He loved it and we had so many plans for this summer and next but now maybe someone else will enjoy it. Will have a good cry later I am sure.
                Hopefully will close on my parents house on Monday. Another bitter sweet thing. I hate to sell it but renting was a nightmare with the 2 of us and totally not manageable for just me. It had been on the market for 8 months...he died and I had a contact the next week....hhhhmmm makes me wonder....
                Dottie

                Newbie's Nest

                Tool Box
                ____________
                AF 9.1.2013

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                  TT, that is too funny that you said not to drink wine with my neighbor on her balcony. She just invited me over! Lol
                  You are a mind reader.
                  I'm at Physio. And I gotta go.
                  El- I was given notice at work because there is no work because of oil prices.

                  Gotta go!
                  Narilly

                  "Nothing in this World Can take the place of Persistence"
                  "You can have the life you want OR you can Drink"

                  AF April 12, 2014

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                    Hey, SL - look at the thread that somehow got bumped up today: https://www.mywayout.org/community/sh...ould-not-do-it!
                    I guess someone is talking to us!

                    A long day of travel lies ahead. Talk to you all later, NS

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                      Went to the zoo today to look at all the beautiful tulips they had. Went with a friend and her husband, her mother and mothers friend. I was in the back seat that I shall call the "widows" seats.....but they needed help getting around and seemed to enjoy the outing. They live in an assisted living place. I did enjoy getting out in the nice weather. Went to church tonight too. I need to be with people to feel alive again. Sitting here alone makes me feel really sad and alone. Poor dogs have been alone but they just sleep so I dont think they really miss me.
                      Closing on my folks house on Monday then I really need to think about my life.....I have gotten involved in a group from church and am going back to volunteering for my friend at a local hospital. These things make me feel good about myself and I dont feel so sad.
                      Dottie

                      Newbie's Nest

                      Tool Box
                      ____________
                      AF 9.1.2013

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                        Hi, Everyone:

                        I have been MIA - away camping with the family. It never would have occurred to me in a million years that I would enjoy camping without alcohol - I didn't think I would ever be able to fall asleep! Now I enjoy it so much more. I feel present with my kids, able to enjoy the fresh air, sky, trees and dirt. It was a great two days and now I am fried (I actually slept great the first night, but ended up on a tree root and my husband snoring massively last night).

                        NO EXPERIMENTS! I think about that, too, but I am luckily so logical that I know it would never work, and even if it would, the risk is too high. Even if I never drank again, I wouldn't want to be thinking about it all of the time.

                        So sorry about your job, Nar. That must be stressful. I hope it turns out to be a great thing in disguise...

                        SL - I understand about loging on too much. I am trying to cut back, too. NS reminded me that I don't have to read and respond to EVERYTHING. Sometimes just a check in and reading back a couple of posts is all. I'm glad you had a great trip, and sorry about all the paperwork.

                        No doubt you all are big parts of my sobriety.

                        xo
                        Pav

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                          It sounds like some lovely ladies have been having some fun this weekend and enjoying the weather. Dottie, getting out seems to be just the ticket for you and don't let yourself be put off by being in the 'widows' seats'. Enjoy what you can when you can. Your camping trip sounds great Pav - haha - I also used to use AL to get me to sleep when I was camping. Haven't been camping since I have been sober. My problem is my partner's truly loud and persistent snoring - we can't share a mutual sleeping space. So when we travel we have to book separate rooms but that gets expensive. I used to use AL to help me cope with the snoring but that solution is now gone. Anyway I am trying to convince him to have another check for sleep apnea - there must be something that can be done.
                          My family are all out tonight so I am catching up on some work - a review I have to do. I bought a new dress in sale yesterday but think I made a major mistake - and I can't take it back. Anyone ever do silly things like that????
                          Enjoy the rest of your weekend but mine is almost over.:sad:

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                            Almost brought a semi circle shaped sofa today. Thank God credit card was declined! What was I (were me & hubs ) thinking! xo
                            AF since January 7, 2014 *Never, never, never give up. ~ Winston Churchill*

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                              Jane - at least I know I am not the only impulsive shopper. My credit card went through! actually I am normally pretty cautious at shopping.

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                                So what does the new dress look like, TT? Glad you were spared shopper's remorse, Jane.

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