Ladies on a Mission: The Official Site

[NoSugar]

Made it home from a long day of flights. Visiting family had a nice meal ready, with wine on the table. One bottle. 6 adults. I thought about how stressed that would have made me before because it wouldn't have been nearly "enough". How I would have been sneaking off to gulp somee hidden "extra". I really can hardly believe I ever lived that way but I know I did. Thank goodness it's over.

Hope you're all doing well and especially you, J-vo. I'm so glad you have realized that it's time to be done.

[Choices]

Wow 3 years is huge! TT congrats! Any home renovations planned to celebrate?

[Pavati]

Hi,

I'm here. Another 13 hour day - they DO take a lot out of me. I am also worried about one of my sons today. I think adulthood will be fine for him, but I do think that he'll have a heck of a time getting there. Or we'll have a heck of a time getting him there...

YES, NS, that feeling of stress when only one bottle of wine was there. Although with my drinking friends and family there was almost never only one bottle of wine...

What's your favorite scary movie, LB?

And Jane, stick your nose in here, would ya?

Good night,

Pav

[jane27]

hi gang,
just a quick pop in to say hi. tt, fat congrats on celebrating 3 years sober. when i envision my sober future, i see you, lil b, ns & pav. that is a great source of strength to me.
welcome back jvo!!
hoping to settle in and post a long waffle tomorrow....
thanks for the shout outs pav!
love to all xoxo

[treetops]

Morning Ladies (and Gents if you are there). Early Sat morning - sun still not up. I want to get some writing done. Great to see you Jane - also welcome Choices. Dont be shy about sharing things here.
NS - I can relate to your story about the one wine bottle and 6 folk. Yep thats what many people actually do - and it used to make me so tense.
Pav - what makes you say that you are expecting a bit of a challenge with your son's path into adulthood? In fact why did I ask that question- :eek-new: - ??? The thing about kids I think (expert with only one of my own!) is that no matter what there will be challenges. They may not be text-book but they are there.
My daughter is going through a lot of intense final high school study during the next month or so. She has a big painting portfolio as well - and its really getting to her. Its tiring and emotionally draining. Once I could help with homework and those days are over now. What I can do is talk and we do (its wonderful to be able to talk about ideas and the bigger issues), but I have to be so careful not to interfere too much.
Ok I am procrastinating myself. Pot of coffee on the way and I must try to write a few hundred words.
Catch you later

[Pavati]

Hi,

Thanks for checking in, Jane.

TT - HAH, you said it about parenthood. So many rewards and so many challenges.

I am off to watch some TV with my kids and hit the hay early (after a good dinner). Hope you all have fabulous evenings.

Pav

[narilly]

Pav, I still worry about my son. Iguess it's just part of being a parent. Some times are easier than others.
after work today I had a thought that a glass of wine would be good to help me relax. I quickly put the thought out of my head but it kinda freaked me out. I guess it's part of staying vigilant.
JVo, I hope your Friday is going well.
Coffee sounds good TT. I love coffee in the morning. It's nice how you can talk to your daughter.

Have a great sober Friday everyone.
Choices, hello. Please drop by anytime.

[j-vo]

Evening All,
I had a really long day with work, then a niece's b-day party. Got home at 10 finally. I'm pooped! Anyhow, there was wine and beer at the party, but it wasn't hard to say no, as I have finally taken the choice off the table. I feel relieved. But I won't get too comfortable.

Tomorrow evening (thought it would be morning but it changed), I'm meeting an old friend in town with a few cousins and my sister. I offered to drive, and I feel good about that. I'm looking forward to a nice dinner out and hanging out with women I haven't seen in a good while.

One bottle of wine on the table for six people? Anxiety for sure. I'm glad that I won't have to worry about that anymore.

Night all.

[little beagle]

Pav I have to say that Anthony Hopkins' Hannibal Lecter series is right up there. Anthony Hopkins is an alcoholic too. I really admire him.
I have been thinking b about you a lot lately Jane. Hope all is well with you.
TT my daughter and I use to talk about everything. Hours a day, but lately she's been isolating herself from me. I feel sad and frustrated. And lonely for her company. She's mad at me because I haven't left my hubby. She says I've traded one addiction for another. Grrr!
I'm figuring out this sewing thing though. The dogs are going to have lots of jackets for this winter.

[treetops]

LilB, yes that would really hurt me too if my daughter cut herself off. I dont think supporting your husband can be described as an addiction (if that is what she means). Although his addiction is sort of your addiction, of course it isn't really. Thats not fair.

You guys keep your horror movies to yourself. I don't like them but I do like crime-type shows. I am squeamish when it gets bloody and never watch the operations on medical movies. I tried to watch the series "The Knick" as it really interested me, but I just couldn't stand the gore.
Am giving Breaking Bad a go as I have finished The Wire.

[STEADFAST]

Greetings, Gloamers,

Lots going on in this thread!

Firstly, I want to say a big welcome back to J-Vo. It's great that the very person who started this thread has returned. I understand that life events/changes prompt anxiety (e.g. the prospect of your son heading to college, etc.), and that we're far better placed to deal with them sober. I hope you gain strength and support from your friends here, and life gets better each day. :thumbsup:

No Sugar, yes it's so hard when our parents get old. What you said about wishing they could be our parents again, instead of the shift that occurs when adult children take the role of caring for parents, really resonated with me. I'm still the same little Steadfast inside, but am witnessing my Mum slowly disintegrate, a fragment at a time. Which takes me back to what i was saying to J-Vo.....I think when i quit drinking around 2 and a half years ago, it was because on a sub-conscious level i knew that the loss of my parents was drawing near, and i would've gone over the edge if i was still stuck in the 24 hour nightmare of alcoholism. On a lighter note, congratulations on your 1,000 AF days! I aspire to kick the sugar habit like you have, too one day....right after the next chocolate bar! Really, i do want to stop eating so much sugar!

Congratulations also to MyLuck on two years, and TT on three years! :yay: And thanks for the article you posted, TT, it was really well articulated.

Little Beagle, i see you continue to face challenges on the home front, but so pleased you still have your resolve and your determination. You have been a Godsend to numerous people on MWO, with your caring and compassion. :hug:

Soft Focus, i love your list of all the situations and scenarios you've survived without alcohol; that's a great way to affirm out quits!

And Pavati, yes, not drinking is like a Superpower. Thanks for making recognise that, it's so true!

Finally, a big "G'day mates!" to Ava and Mr G! :thumbsup:

Have gone a bit over-the-top with the emoticons today! Travel well everyone; we do it all so much better sober.

Steady
x o Footnote re. the emoticons - i had to remove two of them as i was over the allowable limit!

[j-vo]

LilB, thninking of you. Hang in there friend.

Steadfast, thank you. What you and NS are going through, I am as well. Mom was diagnosed on June 4 with ALS. The progression has been fast, as she needs PT, OT, speech therapy three times a week, a nurse is coming in three times a week to bathe her, and she uses a walker now. She's 71, and older for being diagnosed with this disease, but it hurts so much to see her losing her normal physical abilities. Although all of this is going on, and my Dad, who is her caretaker is managing well, they go to a support group and they really like it. Mom's spirits are excellent, and that's because of her faith. They live 5 hours away, and I've been travelling to see them quite often. It's tiring to drive that far, but I need to be there as much as I can. They'll be going to florida as they always have this winter, but she'll have the same care while they're there. I'll be visiting them in January. Prayers, thoughts would be appreciated.

I feel really good this morning. I'm grateful for this. Sitting with my pup, his name is Ramsay, named after my husband's idol Gordon Ramsay. We lost my Leo back in May. That was really tough. Miss Leo all the time, but and so grateful for this little love that sits in my lap.

I'm glad I made the choice to live. Have a great day.

[treetops]

Yes J-Vo it is wonderful when you make the choice to live.Thats what I did over three years ago. I had really bad health results from my drinking and the prognosis was bad. My daughter was only 14 years old and I knew I wanted to be there for her. I didn't want her teenage years or young life ruined looking after a drunk or a person who was dying as a result of this.Maybe I sound dramatic and maybe it wouldn't have been like that - but it sure brought me back to reality. And it made me think- I am not ready to die, there is so much I want to do, and just appreciate while I can. Not necessarily the big things, just the beauty of everyday things, nature etc. And I want to be there for awhile longer to care about cruelty, injustice, other people's suffering. I won't be able to change the world but my little blob on this planet might just help a tiny tiny bit - somehow.
Anyway thats far too serious for this morning and I send you, Steadfast and NS my warmest thoughts - with the trials you are going through with your parents. Mine are all dead and I never even knew my own grandparents - as they were dead when I was born.My daughter also has never really known her own grandparents - all gone. Thats probably also why I feel its so important that I am there (in some way) for her.

Again, apologies for the mini-sermon but this seems to happen from time to time on a site for people recovering from AL addiction!

[Guitarista]

And I want to be there for awhile longer to care about cruelty, injustice, other people's suffering. I won't be able to change the world but my little blob on this planet might just help a tiny tiny bit - somehow.

Oh yes Mam. I believe you have and will continue to.

Glad you chose to live J vo. Me too friend! Regard's to Ramsey.

Jane? W'dup?

Have a great weekend all.

[j-vo]

Good morning,
Sitting with Ramsay on my lap, unhung. Lovely dinner last night with some cousins, my sister, and a friend we all grew up with. I loved that I was a part of the conversation, not just sitting back drowning myself in alcohol. I heard what others were saying and could respond appropriately. Alcohol takes so much away from us. I'm going to be grateful for these small things, like conversation. And the food. It was so yummy. I never cared about the food, even when we went to pricey restaurants. Only my martini prior to dinner, my wine with dinner, and my after dinner drinks...more wine. Good food, good friends, and good conversations. Amen.

TT, I feel the same and i probably mentioned it. My son will be graduating from high school this coming year. I want to be present in his life more, even though he'll be off the college. I want to see him grow and live as he settles into a career, gets married (I would guess but never know) and enjoy grandchildren. I know I will never get to do that if I'd continue on this drinking path. No way.

Have a great day all.